


Ashes

by QianLan



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Action/Adventure, Canon Compliant, Canon-Typical Violence, Force-Sensitive Characters, Gen, Light Angst, M/M, Mutual Pining, Post-TLJ, Rebuilding, Slow Burn, Star Wars Rebels references, mentions of torture
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-12
Updated: 2018-04-06
Packaged: 2019-03-30 10:11:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 20
Words: 79,993
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13949394
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/QianLan/pseuds/QianLan
Summary: After the Battle of Crait, the First Order is securing its place in the galaxy.  Any being who speaks out, any system that dares defy their rule, will be brutally suppressed.But there are little pockets of resistance, spaces of hope scattered out among the stars, sparks from a fire that refuses to burn out.  And in the shadow of the ruins of a once-great city, the Resistance is slowly rebuilding.All across the galaxy, every single day, their friends and allies are joining the fight because on every planet, in every system, there are those who would happily resist the First Order's rule.While things are dire, this isn't the end.It is only the beginning.Because even though the Order has declared that the Resistance is dead, it isn't.Rather, it is rising from the ashes to lead a rebellion the likes of which the galaxy has never seen…COMPLETE





	1. Those Left Behind

 

 

 

_“Starbird, Starbird,” they whisper in the night._

_The darkness is coming; you must take flight._

_Ashes to ember, and ember to flame._

_“Starbird, Starbird,” they all proclaim._

_For those left behind._

_For those whose way is hard._

_For the beaten, the bruised._

_For those left scarred._

_For the believers, the defiant,_

_heretic, and fighter._

_For the true of heart,_

_waiting for the fire._

_“Starbird, Starbird,” we yell into the night._

_The darkness is coming; we must take flight._

_Rise from the ashes, see the mission through._

_Gather, Rebels, it’s time to start anew…_

 

 

 

**# # # #**

**# # # #**

**# # # #**

 

 

 

**Two Hours after the Battle of D’Qar…**

It was instinct more than anything that had Iolo yelling the moment they came out of hyperspace, “Debris!”  He jerked the stick to the right, barely dodging a piece of…

 

“Oh holy hell,” he breathed out.

 

Karé was screaming, and Iolo managed a quick look to make sure that she was still flying.

 

“What the kriff,” she started before Iolo could hear it over the comms: “Oh no,” she whispered.  “No.”

 

The silence that followed was loaded.  They both took in the scene in front of them: the space surrounding D’Qar was strewn with debris.  And it wasn’t from an asteroid collision.

 

“I thought,” Karé choked out.  “I thought they took out the superweapon.”

 

“They did,” Iolo whispered.  _This is something else_.  He closed his eyes.  He sucked in a breath and found his battlefield calm.  “You getting anything from the surface?”

 

“No,” Karé said, her voice matching his—this was no longer a homecoming; this was a battle, and they didn’t have time to be scared or sad or any of the thousand other little emotions they were both trying desperately to ignore.

 

Iolo’s scanners weren’t picking up any ships nearby.  He looked around, waiting for a First Order cruiser to pop out of hyperspace.  When one didn’t, he relaxed marginally.  “So,” Iolo said.

 

“So,” Karé answered, “we still need to get a visual on the base,” she swallowed, her next words thick, “see how much damage is done, if there is anyone left.”

 

“Kriff,” Iolo whispered.  _We are so fucking…_   He took a deep breath.  _Keep it light, Arana_.  “Hopefully refuel.”

 

Karé laughed.  “Yeah, maybe get something to eat, have a shower too.”

 

“I, for one, am due for a nap,” Iolo quipped back.

 

For the past two months, they had been assessing potential new suppliers in the Outer Rim.  They’d been on radio silence for the entirety of the mission and hadn’t even heard about Starkiller until just before they left Zonju V. 

 

As they bounced through atmo, Iolo scanned the terrain below.  While he usually loved the slight advantage his Keshian eyesight gave him, at this moment, he was wishing he couldn’t see quite as much as he could. 

 

He heard Karé hiss over the comms.  “Lo,” she whispered.  “Is…”

 

“Yeah,” he said, “it’s gone.”  He swallowed hard.  “All gone.”

 

“Kriff,” she answered, suddenly wondering what had become of Stiletto Squadron and hoping against hope that there had been an evacuation before… _before all of this_.

 

“Clear space up ahead,” Iolo’s voice said over the comms.  “We can set down and…”  She could hear him suck in a breath.  “And assess our situation.”

 

“Our situation is fucked, Lo.”

 

“Well, yeah,” he said with a humorless laugh, “but I’d like to know just how fucked we are.  Besides, maybe someone left…kriff.  I don’t know.  Maybe Poe or someone from Stiletto or Dagger thought to—”

 

“Lo,” Karé started.

 

“Just…just land already, Kun.”

 

**# # # #**

 

They built a fire on the edge of what had been the base.  Now, it was little more than a smoking crater, some scattered debris at its lip.  Both stared into the flames, their minds drifting through likely scenarios.  Neither spoke, and as the sky turned black, the only thing they could hear was the crackling of the flames and splitting of the logs.

 

Karé blinked, thankful that the smoke gave her an excuse to be teary eyed.  “Okay, best case scenario is that…”  She closed her eyes, knowing that best case scenarios were the stuff of fairy tales.

 

Iolo picked up the sentence where she’d left it, “Is that everyone got away and this was just the Order being colossal dicks.”

 

“Yeah,” Karé said.  “More likely is that the Order attacked, either before or during an evac.”

 

“Yep,” Iolo said, his eyes never leaving the flames. 

 

“But that means that…”  _Some of them got away?_

 

He seemed to read her mind.  “Hopefully,” Iolo said.

 

“But nothing on the comms?”

 

“Nope,” Iolo said, his black eyes glossy in the firelight.

 

Karé reached over and took his hand, remembering the last time it had felt like this, right after Muran’s death, right before they’d followed Poe to the Resistance. 

 

_Poe._

_Please be alive, Dameron._   She closed her eyes and licked her lips.  _What would Poe say?_   She took a breath and opened her mouth.

 

Iolo beat her to it: “He’d say that just because we’re down, we’re not out.  And that we need to take our sadness and let it fuel us,” he said, his eyes still on the fire.  “Some crap like that.”

 

“I hate it when you do that.”

 

“We’ve been flying together forever, Kun.  We think alike.”

 

“Still,” Karé said.

 

Iolo squeezed her hand.  “We’re gonna find them.”

  
Karé nodded.  She slipped her hand from Iolo’s, wiping her eyes.  “Okay,” she said.  “We need a plan.”

 

“Is there anything worth salvaging here?”

 

Karé shook her head.

 

“So, our first priority is fuel and supplies,” Iolo said.

 

“Yep,” Karé answered.  “And then, it’s finding those moof-milkers and kicking the Order’s ass.”

 

Iolo chuckled.  “Exactly.”  He pushed up from the rock he’d been sitting on.  “I’d suggest we bunk down next to the fire and leave at first light.”  He walked a bit closer to the flames.  “Decide in the morning where we’re headed?”

 

“Somewhere close that isn’t Order friendly.”

 

Iolo snorted.  “A magical place that doesn’t exist.  Got it.”

 

Karé stood and dusted herself off.  “Well, then, how about we just fly up to a First Order depot.  I’m sure they’d love to help.”

 

“I’m sure they would,” Iolo said, settling in.

 

As Karé sat down closer to the fire, her brow knitted.  “Lo,” she started.  _What if…_

 

“No,” he said.  “We can’t think like that yet.  They’re out there somewhere and when it’s safe, they’ll call us back.”

 

She turned and stared at him—her best friend in the entire galaxy.  “You really believe that?”

 

“Yeah,” he said.

 

Karé shook her head.  “Learn how to lie better, Arana.”

 

“I’ll work on that.”  He raised his head.  “For now, sleep.”

 

Karé leaned back, trying to focus on the warmth of the fire and not the feeling in the pit of her stomach telling her that something had gone terribly wrong and that it was probably about to get worse.

 

**# # # #**

 

Snap frowned as he set his X-Wing down in a clearing well enough outside the city of Myrra that he wouldn’t run into trouble.  He’d been on a reconnaissance mission when he’d gotten the notification about the evacuation.  The instructions had been sparse but had amounted to “get yourself to safety and await instructions.”  He didn’t have the fuel to make it to one of the designated Resistance relocation zones, so he found himself back on Akiva for the first time in years.

 

It took a few hours to trek into the city, and during that time, Snap tried to figure out who was still around that might know him, help him get some fuel.  _I grew up here, for crying the kriff out loud.  There’s got to be someone._

 

The air was slick with coming rains, and by the time he made it into the city, at just around twilight, Snap was wet through and through.  He kept to side streets and alleys mostly, but he was plagued with an uncanny sense of the place.  Nothing was where it should have been—everything was different and yet…

 

_I still know my way around._

 

Snap shivered, trying to ignore the thought that he was somehow replaying a part of his life, a part he’d screwed up the first time, and that this was some bizarre second chance.  He stopped, his hand resting on the rough stone of a building he remembered from his childhood, and he was suddenly overwhelmed by the need to talk to his mother or one of his aunts. 

 

A bala-bala sped by and Snap shook his head, wiping the perspiration from his face and scratching through his beard.  “Stop dreaming up ghosts, Wexley,” he whispered to himself.  With a sigh he started forward, hoping he really did know where he was going.

 

**# # # #**

 

They had been packing up their things, checking over their ships one last time, when the distress signal came through.  Karé’s hand fell onto her ship as they listened, and then her head fell forward.  Iolo started cursing in every language he knew.

 

As soon as the message had cycled through a third time, Karé pushed away from her ship.  “We need to be in the air NOW.”  She started for the ladder.

 

“No,” Iolo snapped.

 

Karé hung on the first step.  “What?”

 

“No,” Iolo said, moving towards her.  “We can’t just fly off to Crait.”

 

“The hell we can’t!”

 

“We don’t have the fuel to make it, and besides…”  He took a deep breath.

 

Karé’s eyes rained fire down on him.  “Do not tell me what I think you’re about to—”

 

“Two X-Wings against the First Order isn’t going to make a difference, and you know—”

 

“What I know is that they need us!”

 

“Exactly!  They need us, but they need us alive!  That means they need us not to do something stupid, like run off with no fuel into a fight we cannot possibly win.”

 

Karé jumped from the ladder and got into Iolo’s face.  “So we’re supposed to just sit on our asses while the entire Resistance gets decimated?”

 

Iolo swallowed hard, his eyes locked on hers.  “Kun, think.”

 

“I am thinking, Lo.  I need _you_ to think.”

 

“No, you’re not thinking,” he said.  “What would Poe do, hmmmmm?”

 

“He’d jump in his X-Wing and—”

 

“And tell the rest of us that it was too big of a risk, that we shouldn’t try to play hero.”

 

“And we’d ignore him.”

 

“Not this time.”

 

“Lo,” Karé growled.

 

“You know I’m right,” Iolo whispered.

 

Karé shoved him with a scream and stomped to the back of her ship, pounding it with her fists.

 

Iolo stood where he was, shaking, trying hard not to cry.

 

**# # # #**

 

Snap leaned against the wall of the underground passage he’d holed up in, listening to a scratchy transmission and feeling his whole body go slack.

 

A few hours earlier, he’d stumbled upon a repair shop and managed to break in and steal enough tech to build a rudimentary receiver.  He figured he’d at least be able to hear where the Resistance was going and then he could plan accordingly.

 

The message he’d finally gotten, though, was not the one he wanted to hear.

 

After the fifth cycle of the message, Snap turned his receiver off.  He slowly slid down the damp wall and closed his eyes.  _Now what?_   He put his hands on top of his head. 

 

_Please say you were still out on your mission, Karé.  Please tell me you are safe._

 

He felt his heart speed up and he forced himself to breathe, counting the seconds until his pulse slowed.  _What’s the plan?_

_What’s the plan?_

_What’s the kriffing plan, Wexley?_

 

**# # # #**

 

Karé walked back around her ship to find that Iolo hadn’t moved.  She didn’t mention the tears streaking his cheeks, simply wiped her own away.  “We can’t stay here.”

 

“I know,” he said.  Then, he pursed his lips.  “Our best bet for fuel is Melida/Daan.  It’s close and it’s relatively friendly.”

 

Karé huffed out a sigh.  “Yeah.”

 

“You know why it has to be this way, Kun.”

 

“Doesn’t mean I like it, Arana.”

 

“I know,” Iolo said.  “We get the fuel, and we make our way to Crait, slow and careful.”

 

“Seriously, Lo, can you stop with the mothering?  I get what we need to do, and I get why we need to be careful, but…”

 

“Yeah,” he said.  “I know.”  He took a deep breath.  “So, we good?”

 

“We’re good,” Karé said.  She reached for the ladder to her ship.  “They’re going to make it,” she said with absolutely no conviction

 

“Of course,” Iolo said, and they both knew it was a lie.

 

 


	2. Starbird

 

 

Dy smiled at the children gathered around the fire.  It was the night of the harvest festival, and he’d volunteered to keep the smallest of the children busy.  Most of the other beings his age wanted to be a part of the festivities—drinking and cavorting, celebrating the end of their busiest season—but Dy preferred the calmer atmosphere of the small amphitheater at the edge of the village.

 

The theater had fallen into disrepair years ago, but it would always be his sanctuary, the place where he could come when village life became too much.  And he never minded sharing it with the younglings—their minds were open; they still had the capacity to believe.  Hard years of toil and near starvation hadn’t wrung that from them yet.

 

And so it was that on this humid night, he stood on what had been the stage of the theater, the children seated in a semi-circle around a fire, as he told story after story.  And with each story, they became more enraptured. 

 

Dy leaned forward, taking advantage of the firelight, gesturing widely, as he began a new one.  “It is said,” he began.  “That long, long ago, at the other end of the galaxy, there existed a creature that could never die.”

 

The children’s eyes grew wide.

 

“It was a bird,” Dy said, slowly circling the small group, “but not like any bird you or I have ever seen.”  He picked up a stick and began sketching in the dirt next to the fire.  “It looked like normal birds,” he said.  His sketch became more and more detailed, and the children rose to crowd around and look.  “It had a crested head, a long, flared tail, and two large wings.”  He stopped drawing and knelt next to the children.  “But it was a magical sort of creature, born and reborn in the heart of a super nova.”  Some of the children made a noise at this, and Dy leaned in, whispering, “You couldn’t kill it, because every time it appeared to be dead, it was actually renewing itself, rebuilding its strength, so it could arise again even stronger.”

 

One of the older children raised her hand.  “What’s it called?”

 

Dy smiled.  “The starbird.”

 

There were gasps at that.  Then, in whispers, the children each tried the name out, murmuring it as if it held magical powers.

 

“There’s even a song,” Dy said, starting to hum. 

 

“Sing,” said one of the children, and soon the others joined in, “Sing!  Sing!”  They all knew Dy had a wonderful voice.

 

Dy grinned and started the song his father had taught him as a child, “Starbird, Starbird, they whisper in the night.  The darkness is coming; you must take flight.  Ashes to ember, and ember to flame.  Starbird, Starbird, they all proclaim.”  He stopped, fearing the rest of the song might be a bit too bellicose for younglings.  Instead, he inclined his head, as if imparting a dear secret.  “They say that in times of need, when things are at their darkest,” he looked up into the night sky, “they say that the starbird will once again spring forth from the ashes to spread hope throughout the galaxy.  All we have to do is believe.”

 

The children made an awed sound.

 

“It’s just a myth,” Teean, one of the more cynical village teenagers, said from the other end of the stage.  “No one believes that.”  He crossed his arms, sneering at Dy’s group.

 

Dy sighed and stood, wondering how long the sullen young man had been spying on them.  “I do,” he said.  “I believe in the starbird.”  He walked over towards Teean.  “And I believe in everything it represents: hope, perseverance, sacrifice.”  His eyes flared, challenging the teenager to say more.

 

Teean scoffed and stomped back towards the festival.

 

Dy turned towards the children.  He beckoned them over, kneeling once again.  His face was serious as he said, “Over time, your parents and the elders and,” he looked off in the direction Teean had left, “even some of the other children, they’re going to tell you to stop believing in fairy tales and myths.  They’re going to tell you to keep your head down and do your work and…”  He sighed.  “That’s all good and well, but,” he leaned further in, as if imparting a dear secret, “but try to keep your heart open to the possibilities of the galaxy.  Because there is a lot of pain and a lot of scary things out there, but there is also love and hope and wonder.”  He tried to meet the eyes of each and every child before he stood.

 

He motioned back towards the fire.  “And remember, above all else, that the starbird is a very potent symbol.”  He dug in his pocket, showing the children a ring he’d inherited from his late father.  It was silver with a black stone set in the middle, but if you hit a secret latch, the stone opened to reveal a red rebellion symbol set into the silver band.

 

The children gasped.

 

Dy nodded.  “A starbird.”  He returned the ring to its usual form.  “Believe in it,” he said, “even when you think it’s dead and gone.  Because as long as there are those of us who believe, it can never die.”

 

For a moment, the entire group stood there in silence, Dy’s words hanging over even the youngest of them.

 

And then, like that, the spell was broken.

 

Dy stood, clapped his hands, and with a smile said, “Now, who wants to hear the story of the two lazy wampas?”

 

He laughed as he was met with a chorus of “I do!”

 

**# # # #**

 

Poe leaned against one of the walls of the passage just off the cockpit and closed his eyes, thankful that most of the Falcon’s passengers— _most of the Resistance_ , he thought ruefully—were asleep in the lounge or the cargo hold.  He’d been smiling and talking about hope for far too long, and he really needed some time where he didn’t have to be on.

 

He ran a hand through his hair and tried not to let his mind settle on any one thought.  He couldn’t afford to think about all of the beings who were dead or the fact that they were an army without any ships or guns or…bodies.

 

Poe rammed his fist into the nearest wall.  He winced as his knuckles stung and then stared at the dent he’d left, a bit unsettled by the fact that the walls were that pliant.  He’d always thought of the Falcon as this legendary ship and now?  He stood, mesmerized by the dent, suddenly hating the Falcon and its patchwork wiring and the fact that it was a million years old, and _why can’t we have one nice thing?_

_Why does it have to be the ship that’s held together by spit and a prayer?_

_How in the kriff are we gonna do this?_

 

His breathing picked up and he spun, leaning back against the wall and closing his eyes.  _It’s all gone._

_They’re all gone._

_What in the kriff are we supposed to do now?_

_How are we supposed to do this?_

 

Poe jerked as he felt a hand upon his arm.  He opened his eyes and blinked.  “Sorry,” he said.  “I just…”

 

“Poe,” Leia said, “it’s okay.”  She searched his eyes, and he hated that she seemed to read him so easily.  “You look like you need a break.  In fact, I insist on it.”  She took his arm and led him to the cockpit.  “Chewie,” she said, “could we have a minute?”

 

The Wookiee growled and rose, walking back towards the lounge.  Leia pointed to the co-pilot’s seat and Poe took it.  She sat in the pilot’s seat and studied him.  “How are you?”

 

“I’m fine.  I just—”

 

“Poe,” she said, in that loving-but-exasperated way of hers.

 

He sighed, scrubbing a hand over his face.  “I don’t know, ma’am.”  He leaned back in the chair.  “Numb?  Trying real hard not to think.”  _Failing.  But trying_.

 

She smiled a sad smile and nodded.  “It never gets easier.  But at some point, you learn how to pretend it doesn’t get to you so well that you start believing your own lies.”  She sighed.  “It still gets to you, but,” she shrugged, “it’s muted?”

 

Poe nodded.  “I’d take muted.”

 

She smiled.  A part of her wanted to pull him into a hug and tell him that everything was going to be okay, but the bigger part of her knew that she wasn’t going to be around forever and she had to teach him how to do this—how to be the person that beings looked to in a crisis, how to be the next leader of the Resistance.  _Why is it always such shitty timing_ , she asked herself. 

 

Poe ran both hands through his hair and she could feel the conflicting emotions battering him.  She put a hand on his arm and squeezed.  _I’m so sorry, Poe._  Leia sighed.  “I wanted to tell you, before I tell anyone else, that I’m stepping down.”

 

“Stepping down?”

 

“As the head of the Resistance.”

 

“As the… _what_?”

 

“Poe.”

 

“No!  You…you can’t.”  Poe gripped the armrest on the co-pilot's seat so tight, Leia feared he might rip it off.

 

She reached over and put her hand over his.  “Poe, I have to.  It’s time.”

 

“It’s time?”  He gave a crazed little laugh.  “Are, are you serious?  This is the worst possible time for you to be…”  He shook his head.  “We just lost most of the Resistance, not to mention the fact that Luke is dead and…and _now_ you want to quit?”

 

Leia frowned at him.

 

Poe leaned forward, desperate.  “No,” he said, “They look up to you.  You inspire them.”  _You’re all we have left._

 

“And I’ll still be here, but I think it’s time that someone else took control.”

 

“Someone else?”

 

She raised an eyebrow.  “Poe, you are not this dumb.”

 

He closed his eyes, running a hand through his hair again.  He pulled a bit this time.  _Find your calm, Dameron.  Find your calm_.  He sucked in a shaky breath.  And then another.  He opened his eyes and asked, “And just what exactly are you thinking?”

 

“I’ll resign my rank and stay on as your advisor, _General_ Dameron.”

 

Poe stopped breathing.  He’d been in the military half his life, and quite frankly, he’d always been convinced he wouldn’t live long enough to make Colonel, let alone General.

 

“Poe?”

 

He leveled her with a withering stare.  “Yesterday, I’m busted down to Captain for being reckless.  You slapped me.  Hell, Leia, you shot me!”

 

Leia cringed.  _It was a bad day for a lot of us._   “Poe, I—”

 

Poe put up a hand.  “I’m all for teachable moments, ma’am, but…”  His pulse picked up again.  _She wants me to lead the Resistance.  Wants me to…_   He sucked in a breath and shook his head.  “I can’t…”

 

“Yes, you can, Poe.  We both know it.”

 

“Do we?”

 

“Yes,” she said.

 

A part of him wanted to scream.  Another part wanted to run. 

 

And then, it dawned on him.  As much as this was an honor, it was also the most terrible burden she could foist onto another being.  He opened his eyes and stared into Leia’s.  _Why me?  Why do I have to be the one to…_   Before he could finish that thought, he leaned forward and in a small voice most beings never got to hear, he asked, “What if I screw up again?”

 

Leia chuckled.  “Do you want to know how many times I’ve screwed up, Poe?  How many hours do we have?”

 

“But…”

 

“But nothing.  What do you think I’ve been trying to prepare you for this past year?  All the lectures?  Hell, even demoting you!”  Leia leaned forward, clutching Poe’s hands.  “I may not have landed every lesson I tried to teach you, but I was trying to make sure that you knew what it means when there is no one above you, when there’s no higher authority.  When there is no one around to clean up your messes.”  She closed her eyes.  “You and I are a lot alike, Dameron, and…” She tensed.  “I’m honestly not sure I’m the best role model—”  She could feel Poe open his mouth to protest.  She opened her eyes and shook her head.  “Poe, I’ve made a lot of mistakes, but, but…”  She let out a breath and then seemed to find her resolve.  “But I wouldn’t be doing this if I weren’t sure that you can handle the job.”

 

Poe grimaced, but his eyes never left hers.

 

Leia gave him a smile.  “We both know it’s about the worst thing I could do to another being.”  She looked back out towards the lounge.  “Hand over the…”  He shoulders sagged a bit.  “What’s left of the Resistance.”  She turned back to Poe, “And I know that…”  Leia frowned.  “I needed you to see that leadership at this level means curbing some of your impulses.  Pausing.  Sometimes it means doing the unpopular thing.”  She looked down.  “A lot of the time, it means sending good people to their deaths.”  She looked back up at him, hopeful.

 

Poe made a strangled noise.  “You’re asking me to—”

 

“Poe, I know you’re tired, and I know that this has been the single worst day any of us have ever had, but we don’t have the luxury of time.  When we land, we need to hit the ground running, and I think that will work better if it’s you in charge instead of me.”  Her eyes met his.  “You can do this.”

 

The strange thing was, deep down, Poe knew she was right.  He could do this.

 

And that was what scared him the most.

 

_No more hiding behind anyone else._

_It’ll be all on you._

_Poster boy of the Resistance,_ he thought ruefully.  _That’s what they all think._ Poe took a deep breath and stared at her for a moment.  _She sees something more._

 

Poe wanted to see it too.

 

He gave her a tiny nod.

 

“Good.”  She reached out, taking his hands again and squeezing them. 

 

But before she could say anything else, he added, “But this means that I’m in charge, yes?”

 

Leia couldn’t help her smile.  “Yes, Poe.”

 

“Any and all arguments and questions end with me?”  He didn’t want to admit how much the incident with Holdo had stung him and he wanted to make damn sure that moving forward, there was no question of his position in the Resistance.

 

Leia nodded.  “Yes…sir.”

 

Poe closed his eyes.  “Never call me that, ma’am.”

 

Leia laughed.  “You’re going to be amazing, Poe.”

 

He squeezed her hands, not believing that for a second.

 

# # # #

 

Finn sat on the floor with his back against Rose’s bunk.  Rey sat next to him.

 

“So, you and he can…”

 

“See each other?”  Rey shrugged.  “It’s…  Snoke said we formed a bond.”

 

“Like a romantic bond?”

 

“No,” Rey said, shoving Finn.

 

He smiled and put his hand over hers, holding it on his arm.  She squeezed it and leaned her head onto his shoulder.  “I don’t know what it is exactly, but I can see him and he can see me.”

 

“Is it dangerous?”

 

“I don’t know,” she said.

 

Finn shuddered. 

 

Rey moved her hand down Finn’s arm and linked her fingers in his.  “Now, tell me about your friend,” she looked up at the bunk above them.

 

“Rose,” Finn said reverently.

 

Rey smiled.  “Rose,” she repeated.

 

“She’s a maintenance worker, _was_ a maintenance worker for the Resistance.  Now, I…”  He looked back up at the bunk, wishing Rose would wake up.  “She and I figured out a way to bypass the Order’s tracking system but, but it didn’t end up working.  Nearly got us killed.”

 

Rey squeezed Finn’s hand.  “I’m glad it didn’t.”

 

“Me too,” Finn said.  He looked down at their joined hands.  “She saved my life.”

 

Rey nodded, feeling the waves of conflicting emotions rolling off of her friend: guilt, relief, affection, anguish.  She leaned in and moved her other hand in to pat Finn’s arm.  “She’s going to be okay.  I can feel it.”

 

Finn nodded, fighting his tears.  “She has to be,” he whispered.

 

**# # # #**

 

“I have never in my life been so grateful for crappy, unmarked X-Wings,” Karé said as they navigated a marketplace on Melida/Daan.

 

Iolo grunted in response, keeping his eyes on the crowds around them.  It wasn’t like they were wearing Resistance badges or anything, but he was still nervous.

 

Karé nodded to a stall up ahead on their right.  Iolo nodded back. 

 

She spared a look at her friend.  Iolo was tight.  Not that he didn’t have every right to be, but in a place like this, the locals were bound to notice.  Karé stepped a bit closer, bumping her shoulder into his, whispering, “Hey, tone it down a bit.”

 

He turned to her with a frown.

 

She raised an eyebrow.

 

“Fine,” he hissed.  He took a deep breath and forced himself to relax.  His shoulders sagged a bit and he plastered a smile on his face.  “Better?”

 

“No,” Karé said.  “Lose the smile.  It’s creepy.”

 

Before Iolo could retort, Karé stepped up to the stall and flashed a dazzling smile at its owner. 

 

“And you think my smile’s creepy,” Iolo muttered.

 

Karé elbowed him as the owner walked over.

 

**# # # #**

 

Twenty minutes later, they had their provisions and were making their way back to their ships when a broadcast came through over almost every screen on the planet.

 

General Hux was standing on the bridge of a Star Destroyer.  “Citizens of the galaxy, today is an historic day.  Not only has the terrorist organization known as the Resistance been wiped out, but a new leader has emerged, one who will restore order to the galaxy.” 

 

Karé shared a worried look with Iolo.

 

“Supreme Leader Snoke is dead.  Today, Supreme Leader Kylo Ren takes his place.”

 

Iolo’s hands balled into fists.

 

Kylo Ren’s masked face came onto the screen.  “For too many years, the galaxy has been plagued by the policies of the New Republic.  Now, they are gone and with them the last vestiges of an outdated philosophy.  The First Order is the new authority in the galaxy.  All systems will bow to our control.  Those who don’t will pay the price.”

 

Karé opened her mouth, but Iolo shook his head.  He nodded to the beings around them, most of whom hadn’t bothered to stop and watch the message.  Of those who did, most chortled, joking.  “So what’s different,” Karé heard one of them say as he went back to his work.

 

Iolo nodded grimly towards the port and the two started back to their ships.

 

**# # # #**

 

Snap laughed and thanked whatever mystical being it was that looked out for two-bit Resistance pilots.  He’d managed to find a cache of goods he’d hidden in the underground tunnels as a teenager and it looked to be mostly intact.  He cracked open the box and found some tech, rusty but useable, and some credits.  “Thank the maker that something is going right.”  He counted the money, figuring it would be enough to get him started. 

 

He’d get a bala-bala, ride out to his aunts’ place and see what was left there, and then, he’d set up in the city.

 

If the reports were true and the Resistance was dead, he was going to have to start from scratch, making friends and slowly recruiting people to the cause. 

 

_Shouldn’t be too hard, considering what the First Order did to the Hosnian System_ , he thought.  Snap then bit his lip, remembering how hard it had been during the Rebellion, how many beings had simply wanted to look the other way.  He closed his eyes.  _It’ll be different this time._

_It has to be._

 

**# # # #**

 

“Kriff,” Jess jerked awake and almost immediately regretted it.  Everything hurt. 

 

_Where in the fuck am I_ , she thought as she pushed herself up.  The floor was dirt and there was precious little light filtering into the room, what little there was coming in through small slats in the door.  _What the kriff?_

 

She licked her lips and realized that her mouth tasted like day-old bantha droppings.  “Seriously,” she croaked and then, there was a dawning realization.

 

_This isn’t a med bay._

_I’m not on a ship._

 

She looked around.  This time her head whipped from side to side, taking everything in.  _Oh kriffing hell, no._

 

_This is a cell._

_This is a fucking cell._

Fear spiked through her system and she pushed herself up, grabbing at a metal slab set into the wall next to her and pulling herself up onto it.

 

_I’m in a kriffing cell._

_This is so not good._

 

**# # # #**

 

Finn jerked awake, Rey’s name on his lips.  For a moment, he was still in the freezing cold of Starkiller, sure that she was dead.  Then, he took in where he was.  He looked beside him but Rey was gone.  He rubbed at his eyes, wondering how long he’d been out.  Then, he heard a sound from above him.

 

A moan.

 

Finn blinked and then, he jumped up.

 

Rose’s eyes were fluttering.

 

_What was the name of the kriffing medic?_   Finn looked around desperately.  “Uhhhh… Someone?  Anyone?”  And then he remembered: “Lieutenant Elieth?”  He shouted, “Lieutenant Elieth!”

 

The Cerean came running from the cargo hold.  She looked over at Rose and smiled.  “Bas and Tarnan!”  A young Duros and a human came running.  “She’s awake.”  The three of them pushed Finn aside to assess Rose’s injuries.

 

Finn stumbled back, watching them.  He fell back against a wall, relief washing over his features as a smile spread across his face.  _She’s gonna be okay_. 

 

After what felt like an eternity, the medics stepped away.  Lieutenant Elieth turned to Finn.  “She still needs to take it easy.  No excitement.”

 

Finn nodded and as soon as they stepped aside, he rushed to Rose’s bunk.  “Rose,” he said.

 

“Finn,” she said, her eyes lighting up.

 

Finn shook his head, looking down at her.  “Don’t ever do that again.  You scared the kriffing hell out of me.”

 

Rose offered him up a sweet smile.  “Sorry.”

 

Finn took her hand and squeezed it.  “I’m just glad you’re going to be okay.”  His face was bunched in concern.

 

Rose stared up at him and then a strange look passed over her face.  _Something’s wrong._

 

“What,” Finn asked.  “You need something?”

 

Rose shook her head, remembering what had happened out on the ski speeders.  _I kriffing kissed him._

_Crap._

_Maker, why did I do that?_ “No, I’m good.” _I’m just going to die of embarrassment now.  GAH!_

 

Finn sat on the edge of her bunk.  “Good.”

 

**# # # #**

 

Poe stood in the passageway that led from the lounge to the cockpit.  He’d heard Finn yelling and had come to see what all the fuss was about.

 

He watched Finn take Rose’s hand and something in his chest clinched.  He leaned back against the wall, happy that neither Finn nor Rose could see him.

 

_It was a stupid fantasy_ , he told himself.  _A stupid kriffing fantasy._

 

He flashed back onto that strange time in-between Starkiller and the evacuation: stolen moments spent in the med bay next to Finn’s comatose form, sewing his leather jacket back together and telling Finn everything—from what he ate that day to his hopes and dreams for the future.  During those brief visits, he’d come to realize that what he felt for Finn was more than friendship, and sometimes, late at night, he’d started to let himself believe that maybe Finn felt something too, that their reunion on D’Qar and that crazy feeling he’d felt when Finn had taken his helmet off on the _Finalizer_ hadn’t been all in Poe’s head.

 

But now he had all the evidence he needed.  _Rose._

_Of course, it’s Rose._

 

And if it wasn’t Rose, it was most certainly Rey. 

 

_Frag, those were the first words out of his mouth_ , Poe reminded himself.  _Where’s Rey?_

 

Poe let his head fall onto the cool metal wall, wishing he could knock himself out for a while, make the pain go away.

 

Instead, he pushed off the wall.

 

_Doesn’t matter anyway.  I have a Resistance to lead._

His hands were shaking as he made his way back to the cockpit.

 

 


	3. The Bruised

 

 

Leia walked into the cockpit and raised an eyebrow.  Poe quickly stood and ushered her into the pilot’s seat.  “Thanks,” he said.

 

“This is it,” she asked.

 

Poe chuckled.  “My Resistance, my rules, right?”

 

Leia put up her hands in mock surrender.  “I was just…”  She sighed.  “You’re right, General.”  She gave him a smile.

 

Poe stood in the doorway.  Leia and Chewie had the pilot’s and co-pilot’s seats.  Kaydel and Nien had the seats behinds them.

 

“Since the three of you aren’t going to be a part of the new command structure,” Poe said, “and Kaydel is going to be my number two—”

 

Kaydel made a noise.

 

“Right,” Poe asked.

 

“Sure, boss,” Kaydel said. 

 

Poe put a hand on her shoulder and squeezed it, offering her a smile.  “Anyway, I wanted to wait to start bringing in any other beings until we’d hashed out a few things ourselves.  That way there’s no question of who is in charge,” he leveled a look at Leia, who rolled her eyes.

 

“After a quick assessment of what we’ve got,” Poe started.

 

“Not much,” Kaydel said under her breath.

 

“Yeah,” Poe sighed.  He rocked back on his heels.  “When we land, we’re going to need credits, fuel, ships, equipment…basically everything.”

 

Chewie muttered something and Leia nodded.  “Chewie has some credits stowed away,” she said.

 

Nien raised his hand.  “Me too.”

 

“I can’t ask you two—”

 

Both Nien and Chewie made a noise at that.

 

“Fine,” Poe said, shaking his head.  “I just hate that this is what we’ve come to.”  He took a deep breath.  “But I’m guessing I’ll get over it.  Soon.”  He chewed his lip for a moment.  “So, assuming you two can get to your credits, and Leia, I’m assuming you have something stashed away too?”

 

Leia nodded.  “We’ll be okay for a few months,” she said.

 

“Good,” Poe breathed out.  He looked over at Kaydel.  “Start thinking up a list of essential items.  We’ll have to run it by the rest of command, once we figure out who that is, but I want to get started.”

 

Kaydel nodded, already typing into her datapad.

 

“That brings us to where exactly it is we’re going.  We can’t keep flying blind here.”  Poe bit his lip.  “And I’m not inclined to try to find any old Rebel bases.”

 

“No,” Leia said, “Ben will be looking for that.”

 

Poe nodded.  “So, I’m open to suggestions.”

 

The group thought for a moment and then Leia said, “I might know of a village.  An old Alderaanian settlement.” 

 

“Where,” Poe asked.

 

Leia couldn’t help her smile.  “Jedha.”

 

Kaydel stopped typing and looked up at Poe with wide eyes.  _Jedha_ , she mouthed.

 

He asked, “Is there anything still there?”

 

Leia nodded.  “A group of Alderaanians who thought it was the perfect place to settle after the destruction.”

 

“Of course, they did.”  Poe leaned back into the doorway, considering.  “Well…”

 

“We don’t have a lot of options,” Kaydel said.

 

“No, we don’t.” Poe said.  He looked to Nien and Chewie, who both nodded.

 

Poe pushed off the door. “Jedha it is.”  He shook his head.  “Way things are going, I’m going to end up on Hoth before this thing is through.”

 

“Maybe even Scarif,” Kaydel added.

 

“Let’s make it through Jedha and we’ll see,” Leia said with a wink.

 

Poe shook his head.  “Come on, Kaydel, let’s figure out how we’re going to make this work.”

 

**# # # #**

 

There was a new announcement blaring on the HoloNet across the galaxy.  Pictures of Resistance soldiers flashed on the screen as General Hux’s voice announced, “We are offering lucrative bounties on the heads of any known associates of the Resistance, dead or alive.”

 

Maz said to Ipa, “Turn it off.”  _They’ll get to my picture soon enough._

 

The young Devaronian quickly scampered across the space and flicked off the datapad she’d left on the table.

 

Maz sighed, her head resting in her hands.  “Anything yet?”  She shifted in her chair, adjusting the leg she currently had propped up.  There was a thick bandage on it, and she hissed in pain as she moved it.

 

Ipa made to help Maz, who shooed her off.  Ipa said, “Choor said he’d be back before nightfall.  He still has a few hours.”

 

Maz shook her head, feeling a headache coming on.  The “disagreement” with the union had not gone well.  She’d managed to flee to safety with about a dozen or so loyal employees, but they didn’t have much: one transport, a few dozen guns, some credits, and some stale rations.  They were on the far side of Takodana, trying to plan their next move.  One of her bartenders, Choor, had gone into a nearby village to try to get some bacta. Maz feared he would come up empty, and her leg was not the worst of the wounds her group had suffered.

 

Maz didn’t even realize that Ipa had sat down next to her until she said, “What about the Resistance?”

 

Maz pushed her lips together, hating that in their moment of need, she’d been unable to answer the call.  “I don’t know,” she said.  “But they’re not done, not yet.”  Maz could sense Ipa’s unasked question.  “I can feel it.”

 

Ipa nodded and then stared at the fur on her hands.  “With the Resistance hurt,” she let out a breath.  “With the Resistance hurt, things are about to get worse.”

 

It was a question.

 

“A lot worse,” Maz answered.  She turned and stared at the young Devaronian.  “But that doesn’t mean we give up.”  She leaned back in her chair, squaring her shoulders.  “We’re going to heal our wounded and then we’re going to start rebuilding and once the Resistance has set up a new base, we’re going to help them.”

 

Ipa smiled.  “I’d like that.”

 

“Good,” Maz said.  “Now, go and see how the others are doing.”  As Ipa went to the next room to check on the other members of the group, Maz frowned, reaching out into the universe.  She was no Jedi, but she’d always had a way with the Force, and for the past few days, it had been disturbed—rippling out from an epicenter where something momentous was happening.

 

Now those ripples were dying down, and Maz was trying to make sense of this new feeling she had.  Something had shifted in the galaxy. 

 

For good or for ill, she couldn’t quite tell.

 

**# # # #**

 

“General Dameron?”

 

“Poe.”

 

“General Dameron?”

 

Poe gave a small growl and Kaydel snickered.

 

“Poe,” Poe repeated.

 

“General Dameron,” C-3PO tried again.

 

Poe groaned in defeat.  “Yeah?”

 

“General…um, Princes—no…”  The droid paused.  “ _Former_ General Organa said you might want to see me?”

 

Poe had commandeered one of the bunks off the hallway to the cockpit as his new command station and had spent the last few hours going over the roster of survivors with Kaydel, trying to figure out a new chain of command.  He nodded to the droid.  “Yeah, I’d like to know about the droids we have on board, as well as any of the droids in your spy network that may still be out there and able to provide us with intel.”

 

“Of course, sir!  I’d be happy to help.”  The droid tottered into the close quarters and stood near the bunk that Poe and Kaydel were currently using as a table.  Pieces of flimsi and all four of the Resistance’s current datapads were sitting on it.  Poe could almost hear the droid frown as it said, “Oh my.”

 

“Yeah, supplies are…running low,” Poe said.

 

“That may be an understatement, sir.”

 

**# # # #**

 

They’d been in hyperspace for a few hours when Karé suddenly asked, “Do you think he’s okay?”

 

“He,” Iolo asked, knowing full well who she was talking about.

 

“He,” she breathed out.  “Snap, you nerfherder.”

 

Iolo sucked in a long breath.  _Oh please can we just land on Crait already?_  

 

“Lo?”

 

“I don’t know,” he said.  “I…”

 

“Lo,” Karé said, with a waiver in her voice. 

 

“Hey,” Iolo said.  “We know that some of them made it to Crait.”

 

“Yeah,” Karé said.

 

“And if anyone is going to survive—well besides Bee—”

 

Karé laughed.

 

“It’s that boy of yours.  He made it through the Rebellion, didn’t he?”

 

“Yeah,” Karé said.

 

“Got to keep some hope alive,” Iolo said.

 

Karé snorted.  “You really are turning into Poe, you know?”

 

“I know.  Felt dirty even saying it.”

 

Karé chuckled, and as the sound of it died down, her brow creased in concern.  _Please be alive, Wexley._

_Don’t be dead._

 

**# # # #**

 

Leia found it hard to stay in any place on the Falcon for too long.  There were way too many memories for it to be comfortable.  Besides, she could hide behind the façade of checking on the remaining members of the Resistance when a space became too drenched in the past for her to handle it.

 

Currently, she was in the cockpit with Chewie.  How he handled all the ghosts haunting the Falcon, she'd never know, and they didn't talk about it.  That was their unspoken agreement.  They'd share a look or a nod, but neither would talk about the holes ripped in their chests, that hollow feeling that some integral part of them had been snatched away.

 

Leia watched as C-3PO tottered down the hall towards the bunk Poe had commandeered.  Dameron had Kaydel in there, trying to rebuild the Resistance's command structure.  She frowned and turned to look back out the viewport.  While she didn't doubt the sincerity of the soldiers on the Falcon, there was precious little command experience on board, and Poe was going to have a devil of a time getting them where they needed to be as quickly as it needed to happen.

 

Leia tented her hands in front of her face, supposing she should feel guilty about foisting the whole thing off on him, but she refused to give in to guilt.

 

_Not now._

 

Her eyes narrowed as she reflected, for what felt like the millionth time, on her decision to step down.  _It's the right thing to do._

 

_I'm not going to be around forever._

 

She pursed her lips, glancing down.  _It's time for new blood._

  

Poe's voice floated towards the cockpit, and she took solace in it.

 

It had been over a year now, since she'd "recruited" him away from the New Republic, and almost immediately, she'd recognized something in him that spoke to her on a gut level.  Sure, his recklessness pissed her off, but mostly because it was like holding a mirror up and facing herself.  But Poe also had something she didn't have: some fundamental kindness that she lacked.  Leia smiled against her hands.  She knew she had a good heart, but she also knew she had a capacity for ruthlessness when the situation called for it.

 

_He has too much Vader in him_ , she remembered Han saying.

 

_So do I, dear.  So do I._

 

Leia closed her eyes.  Poe was different.  He had Shara Bey and Kes Dameron in him, and Leia was pinning her hopes for the future on that.

 

_New blood._

 

Leia smiled as fond memories of Kes and Shara flowed through her mind.  She hadn't known either of them well, but they'd both managed to leave an impression.  And somehow Poe had managed to inherit Kes' unwavering loyalty and Shara's sharp mind, along with a multitude of their other talents.  But it was their hearts Leia remembered most clearly.  Kes and Shara weren't in it for the glory or to make names for themselves—although they ended up doing both—they were fundamentally good beings who were simply fighting to make the galaxy a better place.

 

_He has that same heart._

 

Leia sighed.  _Without my ambitions or anger._

 

She laughed at herself.  You're too old to start feeling sorry for yourself.  And then, she reminded herself yet again that this had been the plan all along.  _He can do this._

 

_Of course, he can._

 

_But can I?_

 

Leia closed her eyes.  _I have to._

 

**# # # #**

 

“Hi,” Poe said, standing and gesturing to the crate across from his.  “Thanks for coming.”

 

Rey smiled.  She and Poe hadn’t really had much time to get to know each other, but since the Falcon had left Crait, she’d been hearing stories from Finn and some of the others about him—they painted Poe as dashing, a bit reckless, and the best pilot in the Resistance, maybe even the galaxy.  She also knew how highly Leia regarded him. 

 

But, frankly, the man standing awkwardly in front of her didn’t fit her expectations.  There had been plenty of headstrong young men on Jakku, the type who condescended to her, called her sweetheart, and constantly tried to cop a feel, but Dameron didn’t read anything like that.  No, there was something sweet and unassuming about him; she felt instantly at ease.

 

Rey sat, her hands on her knees.  She lightly slapped her hands and rocked back on the crate a bit.  “BeeBee-Ate said you wanted to see me?”

 

“Yeah,” Poe said, sitting.  He ran a hand up the back of his neck and Rey had to fight a laugh.  He was so kriffing nervous.

 

“Poe?”

 

“Yeah,” he asked, looking up and meeting her eyes.

 

“I’m not going to bite.  I swear.”

 

He smiled, dropping his hand.  “Yeah,” he said.  “Sorry.  It’s just…”  He shook his head.  “Kaydel and Threepio and I have been trying to come up with a chain of command and,” he licked his lips, picking up a piece of flimsi from the nearest bunk, “and I have absolutely no idea what to do with you.”

 

A painful feeling, one that was a constant companion throughout Rey’s life, flared in her chest, and she was suddenly hyperaware of just how different she was.  _Even here, I’m the outsider_.

 

“I mean,” Poe continued, “you’re a kriffing Jedi!  And I don’t want to waste that.  Plus, everyone tells me that you’re a terrific pilot and you’re good with tech and you speak binary.”  Poe shrugged, his eyes meeting hers.  “Kriff, I’m pretty sure I could put you anywhere and it would be the best decision I’ve made all day.”

 

Rey fought back the tears in her eyes.  “Oh,” she said.

 

Poe leaned forward, concern clear on his face.  “Oh no.  Kriff,” he said, coming off his crate and reaching for one of her hands.  “No, I didn’t mean to…that was a compliment,” he said.

 

Rey quickly wiped her eyes with her free hand before resting it on Poe’s.  “No, I, I…”  She gave Poe a big smile.  “I’ve spent most of my life feeling unwanted.  I’m still getting used to…”  She gestured around.

 

Poe closed his eyes, whispering, “Kriff.”  He started to move forward, his hands moving to either side of her, before he paused.  “Can I?”

 

Rey nodded and Poe pulled her into a hug.  He squeezed her tight and then leaned back, making sure he had her eyes.  “Well, let me assure you, you’re very wanted here.  _Very_ wanted.”  One of Poe’s hands was still on her arm.  He gave it a slight squeeze.  “You’re part of the family now.”

 

Rey nodded again, not trusting herself to speak.

 

Poe leaned back, trying to assess if it was okay to go on.

 

Finally, after wiping her eyes yet again, Rey said, “Okay, so…”

 

“So,” Poe said, “where to put you?”

 

Rey’s forehead bunched.  From what little she’d seen of who was on the Falcon and the brief introductions she’d had over the past few hours, it seemed that the Resistance was going to need beings everywhere.  They had three medics, a handful of pilots, a few ground troops and…  _That’s it._   She tried not to let a sense of dread that this was all too much take hold.

 

“Although, if you don’t have a strong preference, I did have an idea?”

 

“What,” she asked.

 

“Well, Leia, Chewie, and Nien have already asked to be left out of the command structure.  They’ll act as advisors and ambassadors, but they all have their reasons for wanting to stay…well, frankly, for staying out of my way.”

 

“Makes sense.”

 

“Maybe that’s what we should do with you as well.”

 

“Oh?”

 

“I mean, you’re the last Jedi, right?”

 

“Well, technically I’m not a Jedi.”

 

“But you know what I mean,” Poe said.  “It might be wise to let you be an independent agent, come and go as you need.  That way, I can pull you in when I need you, but I can also let you be when you need to,” he shrugged, “go off and do Jedi stuff?”

 

“Jedi stuff?”  She smiled. 

 

“Is that not the technical term,” he asked with a sly smile.

 

“Oh, no, that’s the technical term.  I just didn’t know a layman like you would know it.”

 

Poe threw back his head and laughed.  “Well, they didn’t make me General just for my good looks.”

 

Rey laughed.  “No, they certainly didn’t.”

 

Poe held out his hand.  “You know, Rey, I think you and I are going to get along famously.”

 

Rey reached over and shook it.  “You know what, Poe?  I think you’re right.”

 

**# # # #**

 

Finn stood in the galley, reheating some caf and trying hard not to eavesdrop on Rey and Poe.  He heard the two of them laugh and felt a strange sort of jealousy flare up in his chest.  It was irrational, he knew, to want Rey to himself, just as it was equally irrational to want Poe to himself, but for some reason, the two of them laughing so easily…  It felt as if he were being left behind.

 

Finn swallowed and poured some of the caf into a mug.  He took a sip and winced.  _Bitter._

 

He spared another look towards “command,” which was what they were calling the bunk Poe had commandeered, before heading back to the lounge and Rose.

 

_Rose._

 

If Finn were being honest, he was mainly on edge because of her.  He knew he loved her, just like he loved Rey, but… _not like she wants me to love her._

 

The sense of guilt he felt at that hung about his neck like a loadstone.

 

He held out a mug.  “It’s terrible,” he said.

 

She sat up and took it with a smile, taking a sip and then wincing.  “Horrible.”

 

Finn smiled.  “I told you.”

 

Rose watched him.  He was doing everything in his power not to look at her, and he seemed so troubled.  “Finn,” she said, staring into her caf, watching as it sloshed inside the mug.  “What’s wrong?”

 

“Wrong?”  He turned.  “Nothing’s wrong.”

 

Rose snorted and set down her mug.  “Don’t lie to me.”  She took her medallion out of her pocket and started rubbing it with her thumb.

 

Finn sighed and finally met her eyes.  He licked his lips.  “When you saved me, back on Crait…”

 

“Yes?”  She couldn’t help the hope that fluttered in her chest.

 

Finn ducked his head down.  “And you told me why you did it and then you…”  His voice was barely a whisper, “kissed me.”

 

“Yes?”

 

Finn let out a breath and looked up.  “I’m flattered, really I am, and you have to know that I think the galaxy of you but…”

 

For just a moment, Rose stopped breathing.  She’d known, deep down, that her crush was one-sided, but a part of her had hoped.  _Do something heroic and maybe he’ll notice_ , she thought ruefully.  She shoved the medallion back into her pocket, wiping her eyes.  “Oh no.  Yeah, of course,” she said.  “I…”

 

“Rose,” Finn said, reaching over and squeezing her shoulder.  “You and Rey and Poe are the best friends I’ve ever had, and I don’t want to lose that.  I just…”  He let go of her shoulder and looked down.  “That’s not how I feel.”

 

Rose nodded, still wiping her eyes.  “Of course.”  She sniffed.  “And I still want to be your friend, too.  No matter what.”  She forced herself to smile.

 

“Yeah?”

 

“Yes,” Rose said, hating how much it hurt.

 

**# # # #**

 

An announcement broadcast throughout the Falcon: “Everyone, if we could all meet up in the cargo hold, I’d like to talk about logistics before we land.  See you in five.”  Poe turned off the comms, then rose and looked to Chewie.  “I guess it’s time.”  The Wookiee gave him an amused grunt but then reached over and gently squeezed his arm.  “Thanks,” Poe whispered.

 

A few minutes later, what was left of the Resistance was gathered in the cargo hold.  Poe licked his lips, looking over to where Leia was seated next to Nien on a crate.  She had an amused look on her face.  Poe took a deep breath, before he raised his hands.  The hold fell silent.  “Hello, everyone.  As you might have figured, given the state of things, we’ve had to rethink our command structure a bit.”

 

There was some muffled laughter at that and Poe smiled.  He turned to Leia.  “The General—”

 

“Former General,” Leia interjected.

 

“I was gettin’ to that,” Poe said.  “The _former_ General has decided to step down as head of the Resistance.”  There was some murmuring, but all-in-all, it seemed that everyone had expected that announcement.  “Chewie, Nien, and Rey are also going to remain outside of the command structure.”

 

“What does that mean,” one of the younger ground techs, Vyssa, asked.

 

“It means that they won’t hold rank, but they’ll still be available to assist and advise as needed.”  Poe took a very deep breath.  _I can do this_.  He found Finn in the crowd and focused on him.  Finn smiled at him.  He relaxed.  “That means that effective immediately, I am the new head of the Resistance.”

 

A large cheer went up from the group.  Poe blushed and ducked his head, praying they weren’t all making a huge mistake.

 

“Does that mean,” Finn started.

 

“It means,” Leia said, “that he is now _General_ Dameron.”

 

There were some hoots at that.

 

Poe laughed and then raised his hands.  It was good to see everyone acting normally.  “Okay.  Okay.  I’ve been working with Kaydel and Threepio to come up with a basic command structure that should serve us until we get a bit bigger.”  He looked over at Kaydel.  “Lieutenant Connix is being promoted to Colonel, and she’ll be serving as my immediate second in command.”  There were several pleased noises and hushed congratulations to her at that.  “Directly under her, I’m assigning C-3PO the rank of Colonel as well.”

 

The droid fussed, “Well, I—”

 

Poe said, “It’s unconventional, but seeing as you already run the only network of spies we have, I’m putting you in charge of clandestine operations and, of course, diplomatic relations and protocol.”  Poe winked at Leia at that.  She rolled her eyes.

 

“Sir,” the droid said.  “I really can’t—”

 

“Shut up and take the damn rank,” Leia said.

 

C-3PO looked from the Princess to Poe and then said, “Yes, of course.  Thank you, General.”

 

Poe smiled.  “You’re welcome, Colonel.”  He looked over to Finn.  “Finn is also being made a Colonel.  He’ll—”

 

“What,” Finn said.  “Are you crazy?”

 

Poe looked up to the ceiling.  “This would go a lot faster if all of you would quit arguing about your promotions.  I’ve looked over the rosters.  I’ve talked to my advisors and trust me, I know what I’m doing.  Are some of you jumping up the ladder quickly?  Yes.  But we don’t really have the luxury of taking our time here.”  He turned to Finn.  “Okay, buddy?”

 

Finn shook his head, still in shock.  “Okay, General.”

 

“Good,” Poe said, with a slight smile.  “As I was saying, Colonel Finn will be running our tactical and security systems.  He’s our First Order expert and we’re going to use him.”

 

“Rose is now Commander Tico; she’ll be in charge of infrastructure and supply.”

 

Rose squeaked and covered her mouth.

 

“Don’t worry, Commander,” Poe said.  “You can do it.”

 

Rose’s cheeks heated as she realized everyone was looking at her.  She wanted to sink into the floor.  Finn looked over and smiled at her.  She tried to smile back.

 

“Koo,” Poe asked.  The petite blonde raised her hand.  “You’re now a Commander as well.”  Poe nodded to her.  “Commander Millham will be in charge of running Communications and Logistics under Kaydel.”

 

Poe looked around.  “That’s it for upper command.  Directly under Finn, Tansirch, you’re being promoted to Commander, and you’ll be in charge of ground troops.”  Poe smiled.  “C’ai,” he said to his wingman, “you’re now a Commander as well, and I’m putting you in charge of the fleet.”

 

“Kriff,” the Abednedo whispered.

 

“Elieth?”

 

“Yes, sir?”

 

“You’re now a Colonel.  I’m putting you in charge of medical and you’ll report directly to me.”  He nodded to Elieth’s two companions.  “Lieutenant Bas and Sargent Tarnan will be directly under you.  You’re our entire medical staff, so…”  Poe shrugged.  “Do the best that you can with what you’ve got.”

 

“Will do, sir,” Elieth said. 

 

Poe looked around the room.  “Everyone else, I’ll be talking to your respective commanders over the next few hours but I’m going to leave it to them to work out a command structure within your prospective areas.  If you aren’t sure where you belong, see Colonel Connix.”

 

Poe stopped and ran a hand through his hair.  “Now, onto what’s going to be happening when we land.”  He looked at Leia.  “Ma’am, if you wouldn’t mind explaining why we’re going where we’re going?”

 

“Of course, General Dameron,” Leia said, rising.  “Years ago, after the destruction of Alderaan, its surviving peoples spread throughout the galaxy, and today you can find vestiges of these Alderaanian communities everywhere from the Core to the Outer Rim.  One such community took up residence just outside the ruins of Jedha City.  Their numbers have remained small over the years, but they’re still there, and I’m certain they will take us in.”

 

“How can we be sure that Kylo Ren won’t seek them out,” someone in the back asked.

 

“Ben,” Leia said with a wince, “never cared much about Alderaanian history; I doubt he knows about this settlement.”

 

“And right now,” Poe said, “we’re going to take what we can get.”  He looked around the hold.  “We’re going to land, make contact with the settlers, see if we can get some supplies, maybe some tents or structures or such, and then we’re going to start rebuilding.”

 

There was some general grumbling as everyone realized just what that meant—they had precious little food, no real weapons or ships; they had the Falcon and little else.

 

Poe’s voice cut through the din, “It’s not ideal, but we’re gonna make it work.  Because otherwise, it means we just roll over and let the Order win.  And I for one am not going to let down my fallen comrades by doing that.”  He leveled a stern eye on the group.  “Now, any of you are free to leave, any time you want.  But for those of you who stay, just know that as little as we may have, what we are doing is vitally important to the galaxy.  Right now, we’re just about the only thing standing between the Order and total domination.  So, we’re gonna rebuild and then we’re going to go out and take the Order down!”

 

“Yeah!”  Finn stood up and started clapping. 

 

Soon, the entire room joined in.

 

Poe looked over to Leia, who gave him a quick salute.

 

 


	4. For Those Whose Way is Hard

 

 

As the ramp lowered and beings started making their way off the Falcon, Finn turned to Poe and raised an eyebrow, surveying the dusty plains of Jedha.  “Really?”

 

Poe chuckled.  “At least it ain’t Jakku, buddy.”

 

Finn laughed.  “True.”  He looked around again as the dust picked up in the wind.  “Well…”

 

Poe playfully shoved him forward.  “It’s a kriffing paradise after all that time on the Falcon.”

 

“Oy,” came a voice from behind them.  “Who is bad-mouthing the Falcon?”

 

Finn pointed to Poe, who held his hands up in the face of Rey’s scowl.  “I only meant that it’s nice to be planetside.”

 

“Okay,” she said, giving Poe a long sideways glance. 

 

As she turned to talk to someone else, Poe hissed, “Buddy!”

 

“Not my fault you were dissing the Falcon,” Finn said.

 

Poe shoved him again and said, “Come on, troublemaker, let’s see what’s what.”

 

Rose watched from the top of the ramp, her arms crossed.  BB-8 rolled up next to her and asked if she was okay.

 

“Yeah,” she said, “just…”  _Just putting two and two together_.  Poe and Finn were laughing at some joke C’ai was telling and it all made sense.  _Can’t blame him.  Either of them._   She looked down at the droid.  “Wanna go take a look at the Falcon with Rey and Chewie?”

 

BB-8 trilled a happy _yes_ and the two started down the ramp.

 

“Hey, Rose,” Poe called out.  She looked over.  He was waving at her.

 

She jogged over.  “Yes, General?”

 

Poe grimaced at the title.  “I wanted to sit down and have a quick meeting now that we’re here, try to figure out how we’re going to make this thing work.”

 

“Sure,” Rose said, trying to sound enthusiastic.

 

“Great,” Poe said.  He grabbed Finn’s shoulder and then turned around, studying the group.  “Koo!  Threepio! Meet us over by that rock!”

 

He nodded towards a large outcropping and started towards it.  BB-8 rolled up next to him.  [And what should I do?]

 

“Hey buddy!”  Poe stopped and knelt.  “I was kind of hoping you’d go help Rey and Chewie and Artoo with the Falcon.”

 

BB-8 made a depressed noise. 

 

Poe had already had to answer a flurry of questions about why C-3PO had managed to get a rank and BB-8 didn’t, and Poe suspected his best friend was still sulking a bit.  “Well, I’d ask you to stay here,” Poe said, “but Rey asked for you specifically.”

 

[Friend-Poe is a terrible liar.]

 

Poe laughed.  “That I am, buddy, but I still think you’d have more fun with her than with me.  Okay?”  He rubbed the top of BB-8’s dome and then gave it a quick kiss.

 

BB-8 beeped once in agreement and took off.

 

Poe turned to find his senior command team—save C-3PO—all giving him slightly amused looks.  “What?”

 

“Nothing, General,” Finn said.

 

“Nothing at all,” Rose added.

 

“That was adorable,” Koo said.

 

Poe blushed and then nodded to the rock.  “Okay, let’s try to figure things out.”

 

**# # # #**

 

Poe’s group had been talking logistics for well over two hours.  “…I mean, it’s not ideal, but I’m hoping that between Kaydel, Koo, and Rose, we can manage some degree of rudimentary organization here.”  He looked up and smiled. 

 

The others turned following his eyeline to see Leia, Nien, and two other humans walking towards the ship. 

 

Poe rose and jogged over. 

 

Leia said, “Village elders, I’d like to present General Poe Dameron, the head of the Resistance.  Poe, this is Bail Soma and Liana Antilles.  They are the elders of the village of Aldera.”

 

“It’s an honor,” Poe said, bowing.

 

“The villagers have agreed to help us and have even suggested a good place to set up our base nearby.  Kaydel stayed behind to get started on the planning, and they were hoping that you would join her,” Leia said.

 

“Of course,” Poe said.  He turned back to Rose, Finn, Koo, and C-3PO.  “That leaves you in charge.”  He tried to ignore the nervous looks that Rose, Finn, and Koo shared as he turned and smiled at the villagers.  “Please, lead the way.”

 

**# # # #**

 

The red streaks on the salt plains looked like blood, and Karé did her best not to be sick as she and Iolo flew towards the old Rebellion base.  The blast doors were gone, melted into the side of the mountain, and by the looks of things, the Order had thoroughly destroyed whatever was inside.

 

“We should still,” Iolo started.  She could hear him swallow hard.  “We should still take a look.”

 

“Agreed,” she said.  She scanned the area.  “Set down on that patch to the west?”

 

“Sounds good,” Iolo said, and then so quietly Karé almost missed it, “Fuck.”

 

**# # # #**

 

An hour later, Iolo and Karé stood inside what was left of the Rebel base.  She kicked a piece of metal.  “They were thorough.”

 

“Yeah,” Iolo said, bending down to examine what had been an old ski speeder.  He stood back up.  “But no bodies.  No blood.”

 

“Thank the mater for that,” Karé said.  She looked around with a frown.  “So, they got away?”

 

_Please, maker, let’s hope so_.  Iolo nodded.  “Looks like it.  Now the question is, where?”

 

She walked over to what had been the command room of the base.  The Order hadn’t been as thorough in here—the comm system was still working.  She flicked it on, hoping that they’d hear something.

 

After a few minutes, she kicked the console.

 

Iolo sighed.  “We need a plan.”

 

“Yeah,” she said.  She leaned back against the console and bit her cheek, shaking her head.  “I’ve got to imagine that any of the other Resistance bases or evac zones are probably…”  She let it hang there.

 

“We can’t be sure how safe anything is at this point.”

 

“Kriff,” she said.  “This just keeps getting better and better.”

 

“Yep,” Iolo said.  He frowned, looking around.  After a moment, he said, “They left in a hurry and by the looks of things, the Order came through and trashed things, but not with any kind of precision.”

 

“Yeah?”

 

“So, it seems to me that we could hole up here for a few days, a week maybe?  Get some sleep and recharge and,” he shrugged, “plan our next move.”

 

Karé bit her cheek harder.  She did not like the idea of staying in this place.  It felt haunted by the ghosts of the Resistance.  “But we don’t have many options, do we?”

 

“Huh?”

 

“I’m just agreeing with you.”  She pushed off the console.  “We bunk down and regroup and hopefully, someone will send out a signal.”

 

“Yeah,” Iolo said.  “Hopefully.”

 

**# # # #**

 

A few days later, the Resistance had a base.

 

Sort of.

 

The villagers had directed Poe and Kaydel to a series of caves set in a hillside to the southeast of Aldera and had provided some speeders and tech to get them started.  It wasn’t pretty, and most everyone was still sleeping on the cave floors, but they had a comm system up and running and were already sending teams into New Jedha City for supplies.

 

Thankfully, both Chewie and Nien had been saving for a rainy day, which meant the Resistance had credits—at least for the next few weeks.

 

As Poe walked the passageways of the new “base,” he had to fight the feeling that they were a bunch of children playing at being soldiers.  Their med bay was a large chamber with a table the villagers had gifted them and precious little else, and command was a hodge-podge of equipment pilfered from Crait, the Falcon, and Aldera.

 

_And don’t even get me started on the idiot they’ve got running things_ , Poe thought as he walked in, nodding to Kaydel and Koo, who seemed to live in the command center.  “You two ever sleep?”

 

The two shared a look, smiling, before Kaydel said, “Sleep is overrated.”

 

“It’s for the weak,” Koo added.

 

Poe gave a good-natured sigh.  “And for the old.”

 

“You’re not that old, General,” Kaydel said, handing him a datapad with the day’s duty roster and must haves.

 

“We’re out of caf?”  Poe rubbed his temple with his free hand.  “Is it on the supply list?”

 

“Yes, but it’s a non-essential,” Koo answered.

 

Poe raised an eyebrow at that.  “Maybe for you.”

 

She smiled.  “I’ll talk to Rose about moving it over.”

 

“Thank you.”  Poe frowned.  “Speaking of which, where is Commander Tico?”  Kaydel and Koo shared a concerned look that Poe didn’t miss.  “Something I need to know or something it’s better I don’t?”

 

“Better you don’t,” Kaydel said.  She nodded to Koo and started out of command.  “I’ll be back soon.”

 

Poe turned to Koo and opened his mouth.

 

The young woman put up her hand.  “She said it’s better you don’t.  Trust her.”

 

Poe shook his head.  “Fine.  While we’re waiting on her, let’s go over the updates on the repairs to the Falcon.”  He looked around.  “Where’s Finn?”

 

“Right here,” Finn said, walking in.

 

Koo tried not to roll her eyes at the way Poe lit up around the other man. 

 

“Buddy,” Poe said, walking over and slapping Finn on the back.  “I was hoping you’d do an inventory of our weapons supply—”

 

Finn chuckled.

 

“As bad as it might be,” Poe said, “and then find out how repairs to the Falcon are coming.”

 

“Sure,” Finn said.  “Anything for our venerated leader.”  He threw Poe a wink and started back out of command.

 

Poe stood there watching him until Koo came up behind him, clearing her throat.  “General?”

 

“Uh, yeah,” Poe asked, startling.

 

She smiled.  “Nice view, huh?”

 

Poe blushed and started stammering.  “Um, what’s on the roster for today?”

 

**# # # #**

 

Rose’s room—if it could be called that—was little more than an alcove set off of the main hall leading into command.  It didn’t afford much privacy, which was why Kaydel didn’t even bother looking there for the missing woman.

 

Over the past week, she and Rose and Koo had, by the necessity and enormity of the job put before them, been practically joined at the hip, and in that time Kaydel and Koo had realized that something was profoundly wrong with the other woman.

 

At first, they’d both assumed it had been the death of Paige, and while that certainly compounded things, it wasn’t the full story.

 

_In fact_ , Kaydel thought as she plodded down a passageway, _she’s avoiding dealing with Paige by focusing on…_ Kaydel sighed, wishing she knew what else was bothering her friend.

 

Kaydel found Rose sitting beside one of their inherited speeders, covered in grease and wiping her eyes.  Kaydel crossed her arms and kneeled in front of Rose.  “We’re going over supply lists and the General was asking about you.”

 

“Kriff,” Rose said, making to stand.  “I’m…I…”  She turned to the speeder.  “I lost track of time.”

 

“Mmmmmm-hmmmm,” Kaydel said.  She put a hand on Rose’s shoulder.  “Look, you can tell me to mind my own business and I’ll drop it, but,” she frowned, “something is bugging you. And,” she said as Rose opened her mouth to respond, “it’s more than the overall general shitty situation we’re in.”  She met Rose’s eyes.  “You want to talk about it?”

  
Rose shut her eyes against a new batch of tears.  “Not really,” she managed.

 

Kaydel let go of her shoulder and rose.  “It’s okay.  I get it.”  She started to leave. 

 

Rose called out.  “He doesn’t love me.”

 

Kaydel froze.  _Oh kriff._

_Oh kriffing kriff._

_I am so not the person for this._

 

She closed her eyes, inwardly cursing, and forced herself to turn around and walk back to Rose.  “Who?”

 

Rose wiped her eyes again.  She shook her head.  “I’m such an idiot!”

 

Kaydel knelt again.  “No, you aren’t!”

 

Rose rolled her eyes.  “I told a guy I met eighteen hours earlier that I loved him and then I kissed him.”

 

“Oh,” Kaydel said _.  Kriff._   She turned and sat down next to Rose.  Kaydel thought for a moment.  “This guy you’re talking about is Finn, right?”

 

“Yeah,” Rose said, miserably.

 

Kaydel nodded.  _Is there anyone in the Resistance not in love with him?_   “So, uh…want to tell me about it?”

 

“No,” Rose said, wiping her eyes.

 

Kaydel gave it a moment.

 

Rose groaned.  “It’s so stupid!  I mean, I built him up in my head because Poe kept telling everyone about Finn-the-hero and how amazing he was and then he’s standing there next to the escape pods and…”

 

Kaydel leaned her head back against the speeder, listening, as Rose poured out the story of how she fell for Finn.

 

**# # # #**

 

Finn ducked down and walked under the Falcon, which they had hidden under a tarp at the foot of the hills where the new base was housed.  He shook his head as he dusted dirt off his pants.  Not so long ago, everything in his life had been precise, orderly…clean.  Finn chuckled.  _Not anymore._

 

Rey was holding a welder’s mask in front of her face, blue sparks spitting out of the Falcon as she worked.

 

Finn approached from behind.  “Hey!”

 

The sparks died out and Rey turned, lowering the mask.  She smiled.  “Hi!”

 

“Do you ever sleep?”

 

There was an instant—less than a second—of fear in Rey’s eyes.  No, she hadn’t been sleeping.  She was afraid of what…or rather, _who_ she might see in her dreams.  The smile returned quickly enough.  “I sleep.”  She turned back towards the open panel.

 

“Since we moved the Falcon and started setting up in the caves, I don’t think I’ve once seen you take a break,” Finn said.

 

“You’re one to talk,” Rey said, frowning at the wiring.

 

“Fair enough,” Finn said.  He came up next to her, peering in the panel and having no idea what he was looking at.

 

Rey couldn’t help her smile.  “Are you just here to stare at the wiring?”

 

“No,” Finn said, grinning.  “Poe wanted to know how the repairs are coming and I wanted a rundown of the weapons capabilities of this thing.”

 

Rey snorted.

 

“Yeah, I figured, but it was still an excuse to say _hello_.”

 

“And avoid Rose?”

 

“I’m not…Poe asked, and…”  Finn sighed, leaning on one of the legs of the landing gear.  “That obvious?”

 

Rey laughed.  “I am a Jedi,” she said.  She put down her equipment and studied her friend.  “I thought you said she was fine when you told her?”

 

Finn shrugged.  “It just feels…”  He shook his head.  _Everything’s happening so fast._

 

Rey frowned.  “One day you’re a Stromtrooper and the next day you’re a hero in the Resistance?”

 

Finn nodded.  “One day I’m a hero and then nearly everyone’s dead and I’m a Colonel.”

 

“Whiplash.”  She could sympathize.  To go from nobody to somebody was still taking some getting used to.

 

“Yeah,” Finn said, he looked down at the soil beneath them.

 

Rey reached out and squeezed his arm.  “Would you like to come meditating with me tomorrow morning?  It might help.”

 

Finn smiled.  “Yeah, I would.”

 

“It’s early.”

 

Finn laughed, pushing off the leg and starting back towards the outside.  “Former Stormtrooper.  I only need a few hours sleep a night, if that.”

 

Rey laughed.  “I’ll try to remember that.”

 

Finn started out.

 

Rey called after him, “A few missiles and the laser cannons.”

 

“What?”

 

“Weapons on the Falcon?”

 

“Oh yeah,” Finn said.  “So basically…”

 

“Not much,” Rey picked up her equipment.  “Definitely not enough to take on the Order on its own.”  She turned and sparks started flying again.

 

Finn watched her and wondered what it would’ve been like if she’d taken his offer to run. 

 

He shook his head, blinking as he emerged from under the tarp.  Somehow, he knew that that life wouldn’t have been any better.

 

He took a deep breath.  _We never would’ve stopped looking over our shoulders._

 

**# # # #**

 

Poe tried not to focus on the fact that most of the Resistance could easily fit into command.  Instead, he tried to sound positive.  “We’ve made some good progress in getting things set up.  Everyone has a space that they can claim as their own.”

 

“Doors would be nice,” a voice from the back called out.

 

Poe shook his head with a smile.  “Doors would be kriffing fantastic, but unfortunately low priority.”

 

There were chuckles.  The new joke around base was how nearly everything in their lives was now “low priority.”

 

“Anyway,” Poe said, “since we’ve got the communications systems up and running, we’d like to start reaching out.  Quietly.  Seeing who else is out there who is on our side.  So if you have any ideas, be sure to find Colonel Connix or Commander Koo or me.  For the next few weeks or so, our priorities are still going to be setting up the basics—food, shelter, medical supplies, getting some sort of coherent schedule up and running.”

 

There were a few chuckles at that.

 

“Definitely be in touch with Commander Tico about scheduling as that’s going to be my next big push.”  Poe looked around.  “But don’t lose heart.  It’s gonna be tough for a while, but we’re gonna do this.  Kriff!  We already have a base and we already have two new members from the village who have signed up.” Poe voice was earnest as he said, “We’re gonna do this.”

 

And for a beat, everyone felt lighter. 

 

_They believe him_ , Leia thought with a smile.

 

“Okay everyone, get back to work,” Poe smiled at the group and turned back towards the table they’d cobbled together at the center of command.

 

_Big speech is over_ , Poe thought to himself.  He closed his eyes, and for a moment, all his fears—the dread that this wasn’t going to work, that Leia had staked everyone’s futures on a failure—welled up.

 

_No_ , he growled to himself.

 

He opened his eyes.  His hands were shaking.  He picked up a datapad, hoping it would help.

 

_It’s going to take us years to get back to where we were at.  Kriffing years and…_

 

Leia walked over and put a hand on his arm.  “Good speech, General.”

 

“Thanks,” Poe said, his smile not reaching his eyes.

 

“A word?”

 

Poe nodded and followed her.  He knew she could see it, and a part of him loved that she felt so… _maternal_ wasn’t the right word, but Poe still latched onto it.  A part of him, though, wanted to tell her that he’d handle it.  _That’s what this is all about, right?  I’m in charge.  I’m supposed to shoulder this without falling apart and…_

 

They were in a small passage just off command.  Leia paused, looking both ways, before she was content they were alone.  She leaned in.  “We’re not back at zero, Poe.”

 

“Feels pretty damn close.”

 

“Well, for starters, I’m not standing out in the middle of the Outer Rim shouting about the First Order with no one listening.”

 

Poe gave a mirthless chuckle.  “Except now, most of the beings we wanted to listen are dead.”

 

Leia frowned.  “Cynical isn’t a good look on you.”

 

“Any time you want the job back…”

 

Leia smiled a harsh smile.  “I lived with Han for years, Poe.  I’m an expert at snarky pilots.”

 

“ _Ex_ -pilots,” Poe said.  “It’s snarky Generals now.”

 

“He was that too.” She was trying to get a read on the situation.  _Does he need to get pissed?  Yell at me?  Does he need a hug?_

 

Poe sighed and ran a hand through his hair, looking up at the ceiling.  “I’m trying here, Leia.”

 

“I know,” she said.  “I just…we have to keep the hope alive.”

 

He leaned in close.  “And I’m doing that.”  He pointed to command.  “I just gave them the big _don’t lose faith_ speech.”

 

“Well, I need _you_ to believe it.”

 

He ran both hands through his hair.  “I’m trying!”  He walked a few steps away and then back.  “But I’m facing the fact that we’ve got no weapons, what few allies we have are scattered and scared, and…”

 

“And we’ve been there before,” Leia said.

 

“Not like this!”

 

“What in the hell do you think it was like when the Rebellion started, Poe?”

 

“This isn’t your kriffing Rebellion,” Poe snapped.  Leia looked like she’d been slapped and Poe instantly regretted saying it.  “Ma’am—”

 

“No,” she said, “you’re right.”  _This is different_.  She looked up at him.  “But Poe, this is never going to work if you don’t believe—”

 

“It’s not that I don’t believe, it’s that…”  He pulled at his hair, shaking his head.  “It’s…”

 

Koo came down the hall.  “General?”

 

“Not now,” Poe growled.

 

She backed away towards command. 

 

Leia lifted an eyebrow.

 

“What?  Like you never lost your temper?”

 

Leia sighed.

 

Poe leaned his head against the nearest wall.  “I’m just…tired,” he said.  “I’m tired of sleeping on the ground in a room without a door and without any caf to wake up to and…”

 

Leia reached over, not really hugging him so much as just leaning into him.  “I know,” she said.

 

He was stiff for a moment and Leia wondered if she’d overstepped yet again.  “You and I have a fucked up relationship,” Poe muttered into the wall.

 

“Tell me about it.”

 

He turned and hugged her, placing a small kiss on the top of her head.  “I’ll be okay,” he said.

 

“You will,” she said, looking up at him, feeling that complicated thing she felt for him that made her wonder if she was projecting onto him or using him as a surrogate for Ben or some muddled combination of the two.

 

Poe offered her a smile.  “Thanks.”

 

Leia shook her head.  “Go get back to work, General.”

 

Poe started down the hall.

 

“And apologize to Koo.”

 

“You’re not my boss anymore,” Poe called back, but he was already planning on begging Koo’s forgiveness. 

 

He wore a smile as he walked into command and immediately, it fell.  _Something is wrong._   Kaydel was staring at her datapad, her lips set in a thin line.  Koo was pale.  When she spotted Poe, her eyes darted from Kaydel to Poe and back. 

 

_Fuck. Please say they haven’t found us._

 

“Colonel,” Poe started.

 

Kaydel swallowed.  “It’s Yavin IV,” she said, her voice hoarse.  “The Order, they…”  She shook her head.  “They took out the Great Temple and most of the surrounding region.”

 

Poe stopped breathing.  He grasped a chair nearby, clutching it as if his life depended on it.  _Dad._

 

Kaydel looked back at her screen.  “It’s too early to know about casualties but the estimates are…”

 

“Millions,” Poe said.  _Probably more_.  He was shaking.  Leia walked over, reaching for him.  He stepped away from her.  “Just give me a minute,” he said, walking out.

 

Most of the Resistance was still in the room; they’d been chatting with each other after Poe’s meeting, but now the place was deathly silent.

 

Finn had been talking to Tansirch and Thernalli about weaponry; he was still holding a datapad up for them.  He looked to the two of them, confused.

 

C’ai whispered, “Poe’s from Yavin; his dad’s still there.”

 

Finn shoved his datapad at Tansirch.  “No,” he muttered and took off after Poe.

 

Commander Millham turned to the rest of the gathered group and said, “Let’s get back to work, okay?”

 

No one moved.

 

“Okay,” Kaydel repeated.

 

Beings started mumbling and making their way back to their work stations.

 

**# # # #**

 

Finn froze at the end of the corridor.  Poe was standing about halfway down, his head bent to the wall, hands balled up into fists on either side.

 

_Maybe I shouldn’t?  We don’t even know each other all that…_   The thought died before he could finish it.  For the last week, it had been _Kaydel-and-Rose-and-Koo_ and _Poe-and-Finn_.  The women would circle up and do their thing while he and Poe did theirs. 

 

And a part of Finn had been amazed at how easily he and Poe fell in together, how effortless their friendship seemed, but another part remembered how it had basically been that way since they’d first met on the _Finalizer_.  It wasn’t like they agreed on everything, but they just…fit.

 

_Hell, this past week, I’ve spent more one-on-one time with Poe than I’ve spent with any other being in my entire life._

 

He took a breath and trusted his gut.

 

Finn slowly walked towards Poe, opening and shutting his mouth half a dozen times as he tried to figure out what to say.  In the end, he said nothing, and when he reached Poe, he simply put a hand on Poe’s back.

 

Poe’s frame shook with a silent sob, and Finn would never know if he pulled Poe towards him or Poe pulled him, but the next thing he knew, Poe was in his arms, head on his shoulder, crying.

 

Finn wrapped his arms around the other man tightly, feeling a very familiar hatred of the Order flare up inside of him.  One of his hands found its way to the back of Poe’s head and he pulled Poe even closer, murmuring the kinds of lies you tell someone in pain about how everything is going to be all right. 

 

Finn squeezed his eyes shut, wondering what _all right_ even looked like anymore.

 

**# # # #**

 

Leia stood with Kaydel and C-3PO in the command center. 

 

“It would seem,” the droid said, “that the Order was targeting General Dameron specifically.”

 

Leia frowned.  “Perhaps.”

 

“Or,” Kaydel asked.

 

“The temple complex on Yavin IV holds a great deal of symbolic significance.  The Battle of Yavin was a turning point and…”

 

“And you think that the Order might be targeting Rebellion-era bases,” Kaydel asked.

 

“Maybe,” Leia answered.

 

“But General,” the droid started.

 

Leia raised an eyebrow.

 

“Ma’am,” C-3PO corrected, “it wouldn’t be logical to attack empty bases.  It would be a waste of manpower, if nothing else.”

 

“No one ever said Ben was logical,” Leia muttered.

 

“Ma’am?”

 

Leia sighed.  “Colonels, I think it might be wise to reach out to any allies we can, warn them that the Order might be targeting Rebellion-era bases and the sites of significant Rebel wins.”

 

“We’ll get on it,” Kaydel said, taking C-3P0’s arm and moving back towards the center of command.

 

Leia spared a look back towards where Poe had walked off.  She could feel the anger and the grief pouring off of him, and she was glad she ignored her first instinct—to run after him and comfort him.  _Finn’s a better fit._

_New blood_ , she reminded herself. 

“Ma’am,” Kaydel said and Leia jerked her attention back to the command center.

 

Leia shook her head.  “I’ll be in my room.  I think you and Commander Koo are in charge for the time being.”  She walked out of the room, missing Han and Luke so fiercely she was sure she was about to break.

 

 


	5. For the True of Heart

 

 

 

He could hear the hum of the laser axe coming closer.  His breath sped up and he saw the absolute terror on Rose’s face.  She closed her eyes, a sick blue glow falling over her.  He wanted to reach out, to apologize, to find a way to soothe that terror away.  He took a shallow breath, hoping against hope that Poe and the others would find some way to get away and that Rey would be okay.  He closed his eyes as he heard Hux give the order, wishing for a miracle.

 

The axe came wooshing down…

 

Finn yelled awake.  He sat up, panting, sweat covering his face, and he looked around, expecting Stormtroopers and Hux and Phasma and finding himself alone in his quarters.  As his breathing slowed a bit, he dug his fingers into the blanket next to him.  He told himself, _this is real._   _I’m awake_.  Finn licked his lips and turned, throwing his feet off the cot and cradling his head in his hands.  _It was a dream._

_You got out._

_Rose got out._

_We’re safe._

_We’re all safe._

He waited for his breathing to slow down.

 

It was becoming a nightly ritual for Finn.  The content of the dreams might differ—sometimes it was the execution, sometimes it was his mission on Pressy’s Tumble or finding Poe’s body in the TIE fighter; sometimes he was still out in that snowy forest fighting Ren.  No matter what the dream was about, though, it almost always ended with someone Finn loved getting killed.

 

He felt tears leaking out of his eyes and he moved to wipe them away.  Even though the rational part of him knew that this wasn’t the Order, that it was okay to cry here, it still felt too radical an act. 

 

And Finn feared that if he ever really started, he might never stop.

 

Finn pushed off the cot, finding his clothes and pulling them on.  He stepped out into the corridor.  He chuckled.  _It’s a kriffing passage in a cave._ He shook his head.  That was the other thing he was desperately trying to get used to—the orderly world of the Order was oppressive, but the Resistance felt a little too cobbled together at the moment.  _Hell_ , he thought, _I’ve been wearing the same clothes since Crait._

 

Finn very deliberately veered off the passageway that would take him to command and instead took one of the back passages that would take him outside.  He wasn’t sure what time it was, but the chances were good that Rey was training.

 

_She’s always training._

 

Finn frowned.

 

Everyone was trying to hold onto hope.  They were all putting on brave faces and making jokes and putting in hard work, but the realities of the situation were wearing everyone down.  And they were all dealing with it in different ways.

 

_Poe with his fake smile._

_Rose and her tears._

_Rey’s training._

Finn rubbed a hand over his face.  _And my dreams._

 

_We need a win_ , he thought.

 

_Especially after yesterday._

 

He had no idea how long he’d stood in that corridor holding Poe, but he’d never been that close to pure grief before.  They weren’t allowed to show their emotions in the Order, and that had meant that somewhere a long time ago, Finn had learned to repress his.  Even when he’d watched Ren cut Han down—there hadn’t been time to grieve; there had only been time to react.

 

Even later, after waking up, grief was still something held at arm’s length.  Rose tried to hide her feelings about her sister during their mission; Leia simply kept on moving, never once mentioning Han’s name.  Rey got a far-off look in her eyes when someone mentioned Skywalker, but… _But no one is taking the time to mourn_ , Finn thought.  _We’re all pretending_.

 

Yesterday with Poe, Finn found himself both fascinated and uncomfortable because for the first time in his life, he was having to deal with an emotion head on.

 

It didn’t matter that it wasn’t his.  Seeing Poe come apart like that was unsettling.

 

Finn swallowed hard and tried not to think about it: Poe’s eyes red and swollen as he finally pushed away, wiping at them and forcing a smile.  “Thanks, buddy,” Poe had said, backing away.  “I’m…yeah, I’m okay.”

 

Finn had stood there, not knowing what to say or do, and watched Poe walk away, and what he really wanted to do was scream, to unleash years of pent-up rage and fear and sadness.  But instead, he’d balled up his fists and clenched his teeth.

 

_The kriffing bastards._

 

He had made his way back to command, to sympathetic looks and beings who he could tell wanted to ask him about Poe, but who kept their mouths shut.  He’d thrown himself into his work and it had been late when he’d finally collapsed onto his cot.

 

_No wonder I’m having bad dreams._

 

Finn stood at the mouth of the cave, staring at the valley floor ahead of him, scanning the rocks for Rey.  He saw her not too far ahead, sitting on a rock meditating.

 

He walked forward.

 

She opened her eyes.  “Trouble sleeping?”

 

He nodded.  “You?”

 

“Yeah,” she said, patting the space next to her.  “Want to learn?”

 

“Sure,” Finn said, climbing up the rock.

 

She gave him a weak smile.  “How’s Poe?”

 

“Don’t know,” Finn said.

 

The smile fell into a frown.

 

“How are any of us doing,” Finn said.

 

Rey nodded.  Then, she took a breath.  “The secret is to focus on your breathing…”

 

**# # # #**

 

It was a terrible habit, and truth be told, Poe hadn’t had a cigarette in months.

 

_Wait, no_ , he thought.  _That’s a lie.  I had one in-between Takodana and Starkiller._

 

He closed his eyes, trying not to relieve the nerves of that moment—the first quiet he’d had since Jakku, when he’d been avoiding dealing with the aftermath of his torture and the absolutely soul-crushing sense of defeat that threatened to smother him at having given up BB-8.  Those terrible feelings had slotted uncomfortably alongside the elation at seeing Finn alive again.  It was all a huge mess, so he’d found his cigarettes and a lonely part of the hangar and he’d had a smoke.  He had smiled at passing techs, hoping they thought it was just the nerves he always felt before a big battle. 

 

Today, though, there was no one to hide from.  Most of the base was still asleep, so Poe took a shaky breath, clutching the pack in his pocket, trying to do the math on when the Resistance would possibly be able to buy more cigarettes and who he’d have to bribe so that no one found out he was smoking.  _Jess would have a fit._

 

_Jess._

 

_Maybe she…_

 

He closed his eyes and tried not to think about that.

 

Poe made it to the cave entrance and paused.  Finn and Rey were seated about a hundred yards ahead on a rock meditating.  The first light of the day was starting to creep across the valley floor, and it made for quite a picture.

 

Poe paused, cigarette in hand, and stared at them, a bit in awe.

 

There was a calm to the scene that Poe felt he could nearly reach out and touch, but he didn’t dare move for fear of spoiling it.

 

He slowly lowered his hand and put the cigarette back into the pack.  He leaned against the cave wall, wishing that he could be a part of their secret club, and refusing to acknowledge the jealousy pooling in the pit of his stomach.

 

_They’re kids._

_Got their whole lives ahead of them._

 

_And I’m…_

 

He took in a long breath and looked down.

 

_I’m…_

 

He let the breath out.

 

_What am I?_

 

He looked back up at them, wishing he knew what it was he actually wanted, what he could actually have, and pushed off the wall, slowly turning and walking back towards command.

 

**# # # #**

 

Finn opened an eye and saw Poe turn and leave.  He frowned.

 

All of his relationships were complicated these days—just suddenly being able to have relationships was enough to throw him off—but with Poe…  _With Poe, it’s something else._

 

He stared at the empty entrance of the cave, wishing he knew how he felt.

 

**# # # #**

 

Snap was trying hard not to be overwhelmed by a sense of déjà vu.  He’d set up shop, again, and was peddling junk, again, and he was slowly accumulating better stuff and hiding it in the passages below his shop again too.

 

_Again, again, again._

 

Snap couldn’t help but smile.  _Reliving my teen years._

_Now all I need is for Mom to show up…_

 

Nyss came running into the shop, and Snap had a moment of disappointment, missing his mother fiercely, before he schooled his expression and said, “Hi.”  Nyss was a twenty-year old human that Snap had managed to hire and recruit in the short time he’d been back.  Nyss wasn’t the brightest bulb in the bunch, but he was enthusiastic and he believed in the cause.

 

_And we’ll take what we can get these days_ , Snap thought.

 

Nyss’ eyes were wide.  “You heard?”

 

“Heard what,” Snap said, frowning over the parts he and Nyss had managed to pilfer the night before.

 

“It’s all over the holonet,” Nyss said, moving towards Snap’s datapad.  He flicked it on and held it up to Snap.

 

Reports of the First Order’s attack on Yavin IV filled the screen.

 

“Kriff,” Snap said.  “Holy, freakin’…”  He took the datapad from Nyss and scrolled through one of the stories.  “They bombed the temple complex?”

 

“Yeah, obliterated it,” Nyss said.  “Claim they’re going to wipe out all traces of the Rebellion in the galaxy.”

 

Snap was overcome with a sudden rage and the need to go fight.

 

“Snap,” Nyss said.  “You okay?”

 

“Yeah, just…”  Snap unclenched his hands and handed the datapad back.  He frowned at his shop.  “We gotta do something.”

 

Nyss nodded, clearly unsure what needed to be done.

 

_Stick to the plan, Wexley._   “How are we looking for those components I asked for?”

 

Nyss pursed his lips, going over the inventory in his head.  “Pretty good.  Should probably go out tonight, though, see what else I can find.”

 

Snap nodded.  “I’ll go with you.”  He tried to ignore the voice in his head that kept repeating, _again and again and again_.

 

**# # # #**

Nien came in with a nod, sitting on the crate across from Poe.  He crossed his arms with a frown.

 

Poe was thankful that the Sullustian didn’t like to speak Basic because he had a feeling otherwise, he would’ve gotten a talking to.  He sighed, sitting, and said, “Yeah, I know.  I look like hell and I need to sleep.”

 

Nien chuckled.

 

Poe leaned forward.  “I have a favor to ask, and I don’t feel comfortable asking anyone else.”

 

Nien leaned forward, clearly intrigued.

 

Poe bit his lip, looking at the floor of his quarters.  He said, “I know that the likelihood that…”  He shook his head, running a hand through his hair.  “Hell, this is a longshot, but…”  He looked back up at Nunb.  “I’ve got to know for sure.”  He leaned forward even more, speaking quickly, “I know we really don’t have any ships to speak of, but I was talking to Bail.  From the village?  And I’m pretty sure I’ve talked him into loaning us that little transport the Alderaanians have, and I was wondering if you would mind taking it and going to Lothal?”

 

“Lothal,” Nien asked.

 

Poe nodded.  “Look, it’s stupid, but Dad and I, we had this contingency…”

 

_He’s hoping Kes got away._ Nien closed his eyes.  _The damn kid is hoping his dad’s alive_.

 

A part of Nien wanted to tell Poe to face the facts, but Nien knew he wouldn’t.  He let out a long breath.  _It was supposed to be different this time._   He thought about that feeling of elation after the end of the war with the Empire and that growing sense of dread that had been coming up on him for the last several years, the feeling like the galaxy was stuck in some cruel loop, destined to repeat the same kriffing mistakes over and over again.

 

Nien opened his eyes and looked at Poe.  He could see that spark of hope in the younger man slowly extinguishing. _The kid needs this_.  He nodded.  “Coordinates?”

 

Poe grinned, pressing a datachip into Nien’s hand.  “Thank you,” he said.

 

Nien rose.  “Tomorrow,” he said, holding the chip up.

 

“Thank you,” Poe repeated.

 

As Nien left, Poe sank back onto the crate.  “Please be there, Dad.”  He pulled the ring from under his shirt, kissing it.  He closed his eyes, leaning the ring against his forehead, and begged the universe to let him have this one thing.

 

_Please._

He was startled by someone clearing their throat and opened his eyes to see Finn standing in the doorway.  Poe shoved his mama’s ring back into his shirt and stood.  “Finn, buddy, what can I do for you?”

 

Finn nodded to the crate Poe had been sitting on and took the one opposite it.  “Ummmm,” he frowned. 

 

“Buddy?”  Poe’s face crinkled in concern.  “Everything okay?”

 

“Yeah, it’s just…”  Finn sighed.  “No.”  Finn leaned forward.  “I don’t think anyone’s okay.  Not really.”

 

“Oh,” Poe said.  He scrubbed his hands over his face and nodded.  “You’re probably right.”

 

“And I was thinking,” Finn looked over at Poe, “Maybe if we acknowledged it?  Or, I don’t know, just did something?  Maybe it would be a little better?”

 

Poe was unable to hide how in awe he was of the man sitting across from him.  “Damn,” he breathed out.  “Yeah,” he shook his head and slapped his hands on his legs.  “Yeah, that’s a great idea.  Really great.”  _I should’ve thought of it._

 

Finn smiled and for a second, Poe forgot his self-loathing.  “Damn,” he breathed out again.

 

“Huh?”

 

“Oh.  Nothing.  Just…”  Poe stood, smiling.  “No, you’re completely right.  We need to…”  He sighed.  “We need to take some time to acknowledge everything that’s happened.”  Finn stood and Poe reached over, squeezing his arm.  “Great idea, Colonel.”

 

Finn ducked his head with a bashful smile and Poe pulled him in for a sideways hug.  “You’ll get used to it, _Colonel_.”  He chuckled, letting Finn go.  “Imagine how I feel having everyone call me General.”  He shook his head and motioned to the hall.  “Come on, let’s go see if there’s any food in the mess.”

 

Finn laughed.  “Is it okay to admit that I still think beings mean Leia when they refer to _The General_?”

 

Poe laughed, as he led Finn out of his room.  “Is it bad to admit that I do too?”

 

The two of them laughed even harder as they made their way down the hall.

**# # # #**

 

Kaydel, Rose, and Koo all noticed that Poe was carrying himself differently the next morning.

 

“Maybe he got laid,” Kaydel said to Rose.

 

Rose shook her head.  She’d seen Poe roaming the halls in the middle of the night—something of a nightly ritual with him—and she'd spied Finn out training with Rey.  She was pretty sure if either were going to bunk down with anyone it was going to be with each other.

 

“General,” Koo yelled.  “You’re going to want to hear this.”

 

Poe jogged over to the console and put the headset to his ears.

 

“This is Maz Kanata trying to reach the Resistance.  Repeat: Maz Kanata trying to reach the Resistance.”

 

“Is this live?”

 

“Yeah, old Rebellion frequency.  I’m trying to boost our signal enough so she’ll hear us,” Koo said.

 

“And so the Order won’t be able to listen in,” Kaydel said, furiously punching buttons.  She smiled.  “There.”  She looked up at Poe.  “You can talk, General.”

 

“Maz?  Maz, is that you?”

 

“Poe?  Poe Dameron,” Maz cackled.  “It’s good to hear your voice.”

 

“It’s good to hear yours.  How are you?”

 

“I think I should be asking you that,” Maz said.  “Reports are—”

 

“We aren’t dead yet,” Poe said.

 

“But you came close,” she asked.

 

“Yeah,” he said.  “Way too damn close.”

 

“I’m still on Takodana, but I’m going to need to move soon.”

 

“You want to come here,” Poe asked.

 

“Not yet,” Maz said.

 

“You sure?”

 

“I have my reasons, Poe.”

 

“What if we sent someone to see you?”

 

“That might be good.”

 

“Things are a bit tight, but I’m sure we can find a way to get someone out there.”

 

“Good,” Maz said. “I’ll send coordinates.”

 

“Good,” Poe said.  He grinned.  “Really glad to hear from you, Maz.”

 

“You too, Dameron.  You too.”

 

**# # # #**

 

Poe wore a big smile as he stood at the head of the table.  “The coordinates Maz gave us put her on the far side of Takodana.  My best guess is that the _negotiations_ with the union didn’t go well.”

 

“Seems we’ve all had a rough few weeks,” Kaydel muttered.

 

“We need to send someone out there,” Poe said.

 

“That will leave us without a ship,” C’ai said.

 

“Maybe not,” Poe said.  He nodded to Kaydel.

 

“Rose and I have been going over the numbers and reaching out.  We think we’ve tracked down an old VCX-100 freighter and a T-65B X-Wing—”

 

Poe winced.

 

“They’re both still functional and in good shape,” Kaydel said.

 

“And they’re both older than all of you,” Poe added, nodding to his command staff.

 

“Beggars can’t be choosers, General,” Rose said.  “And we’re getting a decent deal on them.”

 

Poe looked around the table.  Finn, Tansirch, C’ai, and Koo all looked noncommittal.  “Fine,” Poe said.  “How soon can we have them?”

 

“Tomorrow,” Rose said.  “If we’ve got the credits, our seller is ready to deal.”

 

“Good,” Poe said.  “Rose, you and C’ai ride out with Chewie tomorrow, get us the ships.  Then, day after next, we’ll send someone to see Maz.”

 

Leia stepped over from the other side of command.  “I think Chewie and I should go.  It makes the most sense to take the Falcon, and…”

 

_And you’re trying to distance yourself from command_ , Poe thought.  “I was thinking the same thing,” he said.  “Hadn’t gotten around to asking you yet.”

 

Leia nodded.  “I’m sure Chewie will be on board.”

 

“Good,” Poe said, turning back to the others.  “Now that we’ve got that sorted, I’d like to hear other ideas for what we should be doing moving forward.”

 

“Now that we’ve got the communications system up and we’re fairly certain the Order can’t monitor us, Rose and Koo and I are going to start putting out feelers, see who is out there,” Kaydel said.

 

Poe nodded.  “I’ve got some names for you.”

 

“So do I,” Tansirch said.

 

“Me too,” Leia said from across the room.

 

Poe turned to her.  “Do you just want to sit down already and be a part of the meeting,” he asked with a smile.

 

Leia nodded and sat down next to Finn.

 

“Threepio,” Poe said, “I’m assuming this means that you can reach out to your network.”

 

“Yes, sir.  I’ve already had some luck with that, actually.”

 

“Yeah?”

 

“One of my operatives suggests that we may have some allies on Mandalore.  If the Order is concentrating on known Rebellion sympathizers…”

 

“Then, Mandalore would be a prime target,” Poe said.  He nodded.  “I’d like you, Finn, and Tansirch to coordinate on that one.  Figure out who we’d need to talk to, what we’d need to do if they wanted to talk.”

 

“Yes, sir,” the droid said.

 

“Okay,” Poe said, “sounds like we all have things to do.  Let’s get to it.”

 

**# # # #**

 

A few hours later, most of the Resistance stood on their makeshift tarmac.  “You know we’re leaving first thing tomorrow,” Leia said as Poe led her out towards the others.

 

“Yes, ma’am, I do,” he looked around, trying to see if everyone was there, “but there’s something we need to do first.”  He leaned over to Koo.  “Is this everyone?”

 

She nodded. 

 

“Good,” Poe said.  He raised his hands, stepping forward, and the murmurs of the crowd died down.  Poe licked his lips.  “Sorry to have called you all out here on such short notice and all, but with everything that happened, we never really got a chance to…”  He looked down, taking a deep breath.  “We never got a chance to stop and say goodbye, and I think it would be good for us if we did that now.”

 

A strange sort of awareness descended on the group as they realized that this was a memorial.

 

Poe said, “I think there comes a time for all of us when the losses, the casualties, all of it starts to weigh you down.  You look around and some of the familiar faces are gone—the beings you laughed with, drank with, fought beside, loved.  They’re suddenly not there anymore, and…”  He licked his lips again.  “And there can be times when you start to wonder if it’s worth it, if it might be safer, or heck, saner,” he said with a slight smile, “to run, to hide, to just,” he sighed, “to just give in.”

 

Poe scanned the crowd, trying to meet as many pairs of eyes as he could.  “But I look around at those of us who are still here.  All of us have had loss, all of us have had pain, but we somehow all still manage to remember the love as well.  I think that’s why we keep plugging away, why we refuse to quit—because if we give up, if we give in to our sadness and our fears, then what’s left?”

 

He swallowed, his voice rough and earnest.  “What’s left is a group of beings who don’t value life, who sure as hell don’t value love.”  He gestured at the group.  “That’s why we’re all willing to fight, to sacrifice, to lay down our lives.  None of us do this because it is easy.  None of us do this because it is safe.”  His eyes met Finn’s and he smiled.  “We do it because it’s the right thing to do.”

 

He reached over, putting his hand on Leia’s shoulder.  “And that’s why, before the General, Chewie, and Artoo leave tomorrow, I wanted to take a moment to remember those who have given their lives for the cause, but also to remind you all of why we’re doing this.  Because I think the best way to honor our fallen friends and comrades is to remember what they stood for, what they fought for.  What they _died_ for.  They stood for life, and for love, and for hope.”

 

He gave the group a smile.  “As long as any of us stand and fight back, there is hope.”  He bowed his head and closed his eyes and said loudly, “To those who went before us, may we do honor to your memories!”

 

The crowd repeated, “To those who went before us.”

 

Then, Rose said, “To hope!”

 

The entire tarmac repeated, “To hope!”

 

As Kaydel began to read from the list of those confirmed dead, Poe took Leia’s hand in his and squeezed. 

 

“To hope,” he whispered.

 

**# # # #**

 

“Kriff,” Iolo said, standing and running towards the ruins of the blast door.

 

“What,” Karé said, reaching for her blaster.

 

“Someone’s coming.”

 

“You sure?”

 

He turned and shot her an annoyed look.  _Of course, I’m kriffing sure._   He pointed to his eyes.  _Keshan!_

 

Karé rolled her eyes and made for some cover.  “How many?”

 

Iolo squinted.  “One.  Light craft.  Crappy pilot.”

 

“Still should probably take some cover,” Karé said.

 

“Oh, yeah,” Iolo said, running off towards the other side of the main hangar.  He looked over at Karé.  “So, how you wanna play this?”

 

“Well, if they start shooting, we shoot back.  Otherwise, let’s just play it by ear.”

 

“Sounds good,” Iolo said.

 

“Yeah,” Karé said, turning and pointing her blaster towards the incoming ship.

 

**# # # #**

 

Finn climbed to the top of the hillside where the base was housed.  He smiled as he spotted Poe, looking up at the night sky.  “Thought I might find you here.”

 

Poe patted the dirt next to him and Finn stretched out next to him.  Finn said, “That was a nice speech today.”

 

“Thanks.”  Poe looked over at Finn.  “It was a good idea.”

 

Finn blushed as he shrugged.

 

“It was,” Poe insisted.

 

“So,” Finn said, trying to change the subject, “how does one become good at the rousing speeches and such?”

 

Poe made a disbelieving noise.  “I,” he said, suddenly flummoxed, “I never know what to say.  I just…”  He shrugged.  “Speak from the heart?”  He bit his lip, thinking back to the memorial.  “I mean, at the end of the day, you want to believe that it means something, you know?”

 

Finn nodded.  Eventually, he said, “You want to think that you made a difference.  Times like this, I think it’s easy to feel like you’re using one finger to plug up a wampa-sized hole in a dam, but…”  He breathed out.  “But then, I remind myself that all it takes is one little nudge for everything to change.”  He shrugged.  “Me realizing I couldn’t kill for them.  You,” Finn chuckled, “having to get back to Jakku.  Hell, Bee and Rey finding each other.  All those little things don’t mean much on their own, but together,” he smiled, “together they lead to us destroying Starkiller.”  Finn shook his head.  “Kriff, think of all the beings who had to show up and do something small for that to work.”

 

Poe looked at Finn in awe.

 

Finn turned.  He saw Poe staring.  “What?”

 

Poe shook his head.  “No, it’s just…”  He turned back to the night sky.  “Maybe it should be _you_ giving the speeches.”

 

Finn nudged Poe’s shoulder with his own.  “Yeah, right.”

 

“I’m serious,” Poe said.

 

Finn laughed.  He turned his head, staring at Poe.  After a few moments, he asked, “You really believe what you said, about not giving up hope?”

 

Poe considered the question long enough that Finn started to worry he’d offended him, but then Poe said, “On my best days, yeah.”  He put his hands behind his head, staring back up at the stars.  “When I’m tired or worried, it’s a bit harder.”

 

Finn chewed on his lip.  “How about now?”

 

Poe looked over at Finn.  He smiled and then earnestly said, “I’d like to think with you and Rey around, we could do anything.”

 

Finn smiled back.  “Well, Rey definitely.”

 

“Buddy, you’re a huge reason any of us are here.”

 

“So are you,” Finn said.

 

Poe chuckled.  “Well, then, I guess between the three of us…”

 

Finn laughed, putting his hands behind his head.  “Between the three of us, we shouldn’t have much trouble at all.”

 

“Exactly,” Poe said. 

 

“Let’s win this war already, Poe.”

 

Poe stared up at the night sky, a huge smile on his face.  “Let’s win this war already, Finn.”

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next week: Maz and Leia; Karé and Iolo have a run-in with ???; Poe and the command team get closer; Finn goes out on assignment; and Rey dreams...


	6. Taking Flight

 

 

Rey stood in the cockpit, trying to smile as Chewie prepped the Falcon for takeoff.  “I’m going to miss you,” she said.  Chewie pulled her into a hug, telling her how much he’d miss her as well.  When Rey leaned back, she had a genuine smile on her face.  “Don’t let Maz steal you away, okay?  We need you back here.”

 

Chewie laughed at that and kissed the top of her head before playfully shoving her out of the cockpit.

 

C-3P0 stood at the base of the ramp with R2-D2.  “Take care of General Organa and Chewbacca,” the golden droid said.  “And yourself.”

 

R2-D2 let forth a series of beeps and C-3P0 placed a hand on his old friend’s dome.  “We’ll be fine,” C-3P0 said.  “I have every faith in General Dameron.”

 

BB-8 came rolling up, making a mournful sound.

 

“BeeBee-Ate,” C-3P0 scolded.  “It’s not the end of the world.  Artoo is more than capable of handling himself.”

 

BB-8 let out a plaintive sigh before rolling towards R2-D2 and gently bumping into him before rolling away.

 

“It appears you will be missed,” C-3P0 said.

 

R2-D2 beeped at that.

 

“Well, I didn’t say you’d be missed by me.”  He shooed the other droid.  “Now, go on!  Before they leave without you.”

 

R2-D2 gave an amused beep and started up the ramp.

 

**# # # #**

 

Poe leaned against a rock formation, watching the droids.  “You ever get the feeling that they’ve got more heart than the rest of us,” he asked.

 

Leia smiled.  “Probably,” she said.  She looked over at her protégé.  “Once we’ve found Maz, I was thinking that Chewie and I would go look up Lando.  See if he might be able to help.”

 

Poe nodded.  He’d been waiting for her to tell him something like that.  “You aren’t in the way here,” he said.

 

“Too many instances where I’m going to want to take over,” Leia said.

 

“You know, you can still have your old job back,” Poe said.

 

Leia shook her head.  “Part of being a good leader is knowing when to move on.”

 

Poe laughed at that.  “And?”

 

“And,” Leia added with a sigh, “I think it’s time that we started telling new stories, crafting new heroes for children to look up to.”

 

“Rey and Finn and Rose and Kaydel,” Poe said.

 

“And you, moof-milker.”

 

Poe frowned.  Given everything that had happened in the past month, he wasn’t sure he wanted to be anyone’s hero.

 

“Besides, it will go more smoothly with me gone,” Leia said.

 

Poe pushed off the rock and started walking towards the Falcon.  “Maybe,” he said, knowing that she was right.  Everyone was still looking to her and with her gone, he’d finally be fully in charge.

 

Leia looked up at the Falcon, hating how many memories the old ship stirred up.  “Your mother ever tell you about the time we flew together?”

 

“Naboo.  Right after Endor,” Poe said.

 

“During the battle, she got hit, and I’m pretty sure there was a moment when she didn’t think she was going to make it,” Leia said.  “And she was worried that I’d have to write you and Kes a letter.”

 

Poe tensed, feeling a strange fear for the safety of his mother even though she survived the battle, even though he knew she had come home.

 

“She didn’t want to be a burden to me.  Actually said that.”  Leia shook her head.  “And Han used to talk about Kes and…”  Leia looked at Poe.  “To win a war like this, we’re going to need some exceptional beings on our side and a lot of luck, but…”  She reached over and took his hands.  “But more than anything, we’re going to need beings with good hearts.  Beings whose first instinct is to protect, to love.”  She gave him a smile.  “You remind me of her, Poe, and not just because you’re a tremendous pilot, but because you care.  You care more than any being I’ve ever met.”  She squeezed his hands.  “And that’s why this is going to work.”

 

Poe stood there, tears in his eyes.  “Thank you.”

 

“You’re welcome.”

 

Something about the look in her eyes told him something else.  “You’re not planning on coming back.”

 

Leia shook her head.  “I don’t know.  But I wanted you to know that all the same.”

 

Poe nodded.  He then straightened up and bowed, placing a light kiss on the back of one of Leia’s hands.  “May the Force be with you, your highness.”

 

“May the Force be with you too, Poe.”

 

**# # # #**

 

The transport landed, none too gently, just outside the blast doors.  Iolo turned to Karé, who was crouched behind some crates across the way, and shook his head.

 

She shrugged.

 

A figure emerged from the ship and quickly jogged towards the remains of the base.  Iolo couldn’t get much of a read—humanoid, male, average height, athletic—the guy had a small blaster strapped to his thigh and held a blaster rifle in his hands.  And the way the guy carried himself…  Iolo frowned. _Whoever he is, he’s military._

_That doesn’t bode well for us._

 

He turned to look at Karé, who nodded.  He held up three fingers, slowly counting down.

 

At zero, the two of them rose, blasters pointed at the intruder, who immediately stopped and raised his hands, the rifle falling to his side.

 

“State your name and your business here,” Iolo called out.

 

The man cocked his head to the side, seeming to size the two of them up.  “You what’s left of the Resistance?”

 

“Name and business, old man,” Karé said.

 

“Old man?”  He chuckled.  “Kes.  Kes Dameron.  I’m looking for my son.”

 

Iolo and Karé looked at each other, both desperately wanting to believe him, but knowing that this could be a trap.

 

“If you’re Poe’s father,” Iolo started.

 

“Tell you something that only a friendly would know?  Hell, son, I haven’t talked to Poe much since he left the Republic.  How would I know what he’s told you or not?”

 

“We flew with Poe in Rapier Squadron, sir,” Karé said, her blaster still trained on him.

 

The man squinted, trying to see her better.  “That would make you Kun.”  He turned.  “And you Arana.”

 

“Kriff,” Iolo said, lowering his blaster.

 

“And he wears his mama’s ring on a chain around his neck,” Kes added.

 

“Fuck,” Karé said, lowering her blaster and running out to meet Poe’s dad.  “It’s an honor to meet you, Sergeant.”  She started to embrace him, stopped, and held out a hand.

 

Kes lowered his hands and shook his head, chuckling.  “It’s just Kes.”  He pulled her into a hug.  “Good to see you.”

 

Kes let go of Karé and shook Iolo’s hand.  “Is he here?”

 

Iolo shook his head.  “None of them are.  We got here about two days too late.”

 

Kes kicked at the dirt.  “Figures.”  He shook his head.  “Got Leia’s message and figured that meant things were about to get bad.”  He studied the base.  “Any idea where they went?”

 

“None,” Karé said.  “We’ve been holed up here trying to figure out our next move.”

 

“So, it’s bad,” Kes asked.

 

Iolo nodded.  “The base on D’Qar is gone and the best we can figure, the Order attacked during the evac.  Hell,” Iolo said, pointing towards the communication terminal.  “The Order keeps broadcasting reports that the Resistance is dead.”

 

Kes nodded.  “Yeah.  I heard some of that.”  He frowned, looking around as if he hoped Poe would suddenly pop up from behind some crate. 

 

“I’m Karé,” she said.  “And this is Iolo.”

 

“Good to meet you,” Kes said.  “When he managed to send messages, he talked about you.  And the other one…”

 

“Muran,” Iolo said.

 

“Yeah,” Kes said, hating opening old wounds.  He shook his head as he noticed all the blast marks.  “Order did a hell of a job here, didn’t they?”

 

“As best we can figure, the Resistance slipped out the back and then the Order came in and made a mess of everything.”

 

Kes looked around.  “Anything worth salvaging?”

 

“Not really.  Why,” Karé asked.

 

Kes turned and stared back out at the salt plains.  “Poe and I had a contingency plan.  If everything ever went to hell.  A meeting place.”  He turned back to Karé and Iolo.  “Figure that’s worth a shot.”

 

Karé and Iolo traded a look, and finally Iolo said, “Anything’s better than Crait.”

 

**# # # #**

 

“Sir!  Sir,” C-3P0 called out.  “I’ve had word from my contact on Mandalore and it seems that at least one of the clans would be willing to talk if we’ll send someone.”

 

Poe groaned.  Even though Nien, Leia, and Chewie were technically all retired, the Resistance was already missing the manpower, and now, if they had to send someone to Mandalore...  “And we don’t have the ships,” he muttered.

 

“Sir?”

 

Poe shook his head and walked to the table they were using for most of their meetings.  Kaydel, Koo, and Rose were already nearby.  “Finn,” Poe called out.  “You’re gonna wanna be in on this as well.”

 

“What is it?”

 

“Threepio got word from Mandalore, and,” Poe turned to the droid, “which clan is it?”

 

“Eldar, sir.”

 

“And Clan Eldar is willing to talk.  But that means we have to send someone.”

 

“And that means we’re down a ship,” Rose said.

 

“Exactly.”

 

“What about Aldera,” Kaydel asked.  “They have an extra transport.”

 

“No, they don’t,” Poe said.  “We’ve already borrowed it.”

 

Kaydel raised an eyebrow.  “We have?”

 

“Secret mission,” Poe said.

 

There were some shared looks around the table, but no one pressed it. 

 

Finn said, “If Threepio has made the connection, he needs to be the one to go.”

 

Poe grimaced and was happy when the droid said, “Oh, I couldn’t possibly go alone, Colonel.”

 

“I agree,” Poe said.  “Which means that we rule out the X-Wing.”  _Which leaves us unable to evac, if it comes to that._    “Plus, it means we’d be down two beings.”

 

Rose said, “But we’re talking about potentially gaining allies, right?  That would be bodies and conceivably, weapons and ships.”

 

“Yeah,” Finn said.  “I think the risks are worth it.”

 

Poe hated how cautious he’d become over the past few weeks.  “Fine, but that still leaves us with who to send.”

 

“Me,” Finn said.

 

“No,” Poe said.  “The whole point of creating a command structure is so that our commanders are the ones directing movement.  They aren’t the ones out there in the field.”

 

“With all due respect, Poe, we don’t have enough beings to make that distinction at this point,” Finn said.  “Our entire ground force is four beings, and we have three pilots.”

 

“And none of them have any sort of diplomatic experience,” Kaydel added.

 

“And Finn does,” Poe asked.

 

“He has a reputation,” Rose said.

 

Koo added, “Beings have heard about him.  It might carry some weight.”

 

“And Threepio will be there for the trickier diplomatic stuff,” Kaydel added.

 

“Plus,” Finn said, “I’ve already been working on this with Tansirch and Threepio."

 

In his gut, Poe knew it was a good call, but he’d nearly lost Finn twice in recent memory and he wasn’t eager to send him off into the unknown yet again.

 

 _You’re being a shitty leader_ , Poe told himself.  He took a deep breath.  “Yeah,” Poe said.  He nodded.  “You’re right.”  He looked over at Finn.  “You and Threepio, be ready to leave tomorrow morning.  Rose, get them both up to snuff on flying the transport.  Kaydel, poke around and see what the Order’s presence is like out near Mandalore.  Koo, you’ll be taking over for Finn temporarily, so check in with Tansirch and C’ai.”  He looked around the table.  “Got it?”

 

Everyone nodded.

 

“Good.  Dismissed.”

 

Poe marched away from the table, calling back, “Colonel Connix, I’ll be back in ten.”

 

“Sure, General.”  She shared a look with Koo, who shrugged.

 

Poe felt for the pack of cigarettes in his jacket.

 

Rey had come into command to tell Rose about a droid she’d managed to pick up in New Jedha City.  She watched Poe leave and saw the scowl set on Finn’s face.  She slipped out of command and doubled back into a passage that she was almost certain would lead her to Poe.  She spotted him near one of the back entrances to the base, leaning against a wall, smoking.  She was just about to tell him to back off of Finn when she watched him throw the cigarette at the ground, give a strangled yell, and pound the cave wall with both fists.  She jumped back, yelping, “Poe?”

 

Poe turned, not even bothering to hide the scrapes on his knuckles.  Rey raised an eyebrow.  “Yeah, Rey?”

 

“Are you…”  She started forward.

 

“I’m fine, Rey.”  He leaned his forehead against the wall.  “You need something?”

 

“Poe,” she started.

 

“Not now, Rey.”

 

“Yes, now, Poe,” she said.

 

He looked over at her.  She wore an annoyed frown.  She crossed her arms and leaned against the wall, her eyes boring into him.  A part of him wanted to confess all his sins, just unload on the girl.  Instead, he shook his head.  “I’m not Leia,” Poe said.

 

“No,” Rey said, “you’re not.”  Poe’s eyes flew up to hers and she saw something fierce and angry there.  “But,” she quickly added, “that’s not a bad thing.”

 

Poe snorted.  “Well, it’s going beautifully so far.”  He walked over and stomped out the cigarette. 

 

“Everything considered, it is, actually.”

 

Poe stopped.  He asked, “Is that your pep talk?”

 

“No,” Rey said.  “I’m not trying to give you a pep talk.  I came to check on my friend.”

 

Poe felt some of his tension release at that.  “Yeah.”  He let out a long breath.  “I’m being an asshole, aren’t I?”

 

“A bit.”  Rey said, and then it clicked into place.  “You’re worried about him.”

 

Poe felt as if he’d been slapped.  _Am I that obvious?_   He nearly asked.  Instead, he said, “Yeah, well, there’s no room for that now.”  He stepped closer to her.  “I have to think about the Resistance instead of what I—”

 

“Poe, from what little I’ve seen and heard about you, you’ve always put the Resistance before yourself.  You wouldn’t be here if you didn’t want to help other beings.  None of us would.”  She stepped forward, her voice going soft, “It’s okay to want something for yourself.”

 

Poe didn’t know how to answer that.  He’d gotten so used to the idea that he was some selfish hotshot that her words sounded foreign and untrue.

 

“I’m not lying,” she said.

 

“Don’t,” Poe said, turning and pressing his forehead to the cave wall, trying to find solace in the coolness.

 

“Don’t what?  Tell you the truth?”

 

“No,” Poe said, turning to look at her.  “Don’t do that Jedi mind stuff.”

 

Rey laughed and turned, leaning against the wall.  “I’m not reading your mind, Poe.”  She snuck a glance over at him.  “You’re not that hard to read without the Force.”

 

He puffed out a breath.  “Great.”

 

“Sorry,” Rey said.

 

Poe shook his head.  “Just trying to be…” He turned, leaning back against the wall.  “Just trying to be…”  He ran a hand through his hair.  “Kriff!  Inspiring?  I don’t know!  Whatever it is that they need,” he said, nodding towards command.

 

Rey put a hand on his arm.  “I don’t know why you think you have to change.”

 

“Leia and Holdo seemed to think that—”

 

“Well, they’re not here now, are they,” Rey said.  “And Leia left you in charge for a reason.”

 

“Yeah,” Poe said, scrubbing a hand across his face.  _Because there was no one else._

 

Rey grabbed Poe’s arm and started pulling him down the passage.  “Come on.”

 

“What?”

 

“We’re going to go eat and you’re going to stop trying to be _Poe Dameron, heroic leader_ , and you’re just going to be _Poe Dameron, normal guy_ , and we’re going to talk.”

 

Poe let her pull him from the wall.  “Does that mean you’re going to be _Rey, normal woman_ , and not _Rey-the-Jedi_?”

 

She smiled.  “Yes.”  She tugged his arm harder.  “Now, come on.”

 

**# # # #**

 

Finn had stewed for about three minutes before deciding to go have a talk with Poe.  He’d wandered the halls until he’d heard Rey talking to Poe.  He’d heard a lot of the discussion.  Now, he watched Rey dragging Poe towards the mess, the two of them laughing and joking.  He frowned.

 

“They fit well together,” Rose said, coming up behind him.

 

Finn nodded.  “Makes sense.”

 

“Hmmmm?”

 

“Both pilots.  Both into droids.  Both brave.  And good.”

 

“And both of them think the world of you.”

 

Finn made a disbelieving noise at that and started back towards command.  “I’m just glad he’s got someone to talk to.”

 

Rose fell in next to him.  “Why don’t you go after them?”

 

“Don’t think I’m his favorite person right now,” Finn said, wishing Rose would just let it be.

 

“He doesn’t want you to leave.”

 

“Yeah,” Finn said harshly.  _Doesn’t think I can do it._

 

“Because he doesn’t want you to go away again,” Rose said.  “He’s going to miss you.”  She looked down.  “We all are.”

 

“Right,” Finn said.

 

Rose rolled her eyes.  “You really don’t get it, do you?”  She marched off to go talk to Koo.

 

“What’s with her,” Finn asked, Kaydel, who was standing at the entrance to command.

 

“You’re an idiot, Finn,” Kaydel said, going off to talk to C-3P0.

 

“Great,” Finn said, putting his datapad down none too gently.  “As long as everyone’s in agreement.”

 

**# # # #**

 

The Falcon set down next to a few dilapidated structures in the crook of a hill.  The sky was blue; the grass was green, and for a moment, Leia reflected on how peaceful the galaxy could seem.  “From a certain point of view,” she murmured.

 

Chewie warbled a question.

 

“Nothing,” Leia said, moving towards the ramp.  “Just something Luke used to say.”

 

As the ramp lowered, Leia watched as a group of about a dozen beings made their way out of the structures.  Maz waved.  She was on crutches.

 

Leia sighed as she made her way over, giving Maz a light hug.  “Hello.”

 

“Hello,” Maz said.  She winked at Chewie before turning back to Leia.  “I think you and I have some catching up to do.”  She said to her people, “Start loading up our transport.”

 

“Chewie,” Leia said.  “Could you help them?”

 

The Wookiee growled in agreement and Leia turned back to Maz, who pointed inside.  “Finn and Poe didn’t find the Master Codebreaker?”

 

“No,” Leia said.  “Finn and one of our technicians found a slicer.  The Order caught them.  Nearly executed them.”

 

Maz shook her head.

 

“And while they were doing that, Poe led a mutiny.”

 

Maz chuckled.  “Good for him,” she muttered.  She studied Leia as they both took seats in a long, dim room.  “But now?”

 

“Now, there’s about thirty of us.  We’re on Jedha, and Poe is in charge.”

 

“Good,” Maz said.

 

Leia raised an eyebrow.

 

Maz leaned forward.  “How blunt do you want me to be?”

 

Leia shrugged.  “I think I can handle it.”

 

“He’s what the Resistance needs.”

 

“I agree.”

 

“He reminds me of you.  That’s why you recruited him.  He’s got your reckless streak.”

 

“I’ve been trying to break him of that.”

 

“I don’t know why,” Maz said.  “He throws himself into the fight to try to protect the beings he loves.  He doesn’t ask anyone to do anything he wouldn’t do himself—usually tries to run in first so they won’t be in danger.”  Maz smiled.  “He’s got to learn to stop with the self-sacrificing, but,” she said, “there’s a lot of that in the Resistance.”  Leia thought about Han and Luke.  “You still have Finn and Rey?”

 

Leia nodded. 

 

“Good,” Maz said.  “They’ll help balance him out.”  She had a twinkle in her eye as she said, “Reckless in different ways.”

 

Leia laughed.  “You have to be a bit foolhardy to do this, don’t you?”

 

“Exactly,” Maz said, slapping the table.  After a moment, she leaned back.  “What’s the plan, Leia?”

 

“How many beings do you have here?”

 

“We have fourteen, including me,” Maz said.  “And every last one of them is ready to sign up.”

 

“Good,” Leia said.  “We’re down to two ships and not much else.”

 

“I can help with that.”

 

“Figured you could,” Leia said.  “Chewie, Nien, and I have given Poe enough credits to get things started but…”

 

“But now, they’re going to need bodies and connections and resources,” Maz said.  “Which is what I’m good at.”

 

Leia nodded. 

 

“But I’m more interested in you.  What’s _your_ plan?”

 

“Chewie and I are going to go poking around Anoat sector, see what Lando is up to.”

 

“My guess is trying to lay low.  If Ben is in charge, he can’t be safe.”

 

“No,” Leia said.  “Nothing connected to Han or me is.”

 

“Is that why you’re leaving?”

 

Leia shook her head.  “Poe needs a fresh start, needs to be free to make his own decisions without me coloring things.”

 

“You’re still going to color things.  That boy idolizes you,” Maz said.

 

“I’m pretty sure I managed to change that.”

 

Maz frowned, wondering what had happened, but she sensed that Leia wasn’t going to talk about it.  She sighed.  “Maybe that’s for the best.”

 

“Maybe it is,” Leia said.  “Now,” she said, leaning forward.  “Any information on where we might find Lando?”

 

**# # # #**

 

“Be careful,” Rey said, squeezing just a bit harder and not really wanting to let go of her friend.  _We haven’t had enough time._

 

Finn slowly pulled back, keeping a hand on her shoulder.  “I will.”  He looked over at the other end of command where Poe, Kaydel, Rose, and Koo were all frowning over a datapad.  “Try to keep an eye on them, okay?”

 

Rey looked over.  “Of course.”  She frowned as she spotted Rose look up and then excuse herself from the meeting.  “I’ll keep them safe.”

 

Finn squeezed her arm and let go.  “Keep yourself safe too.”

 

“I will.”

 

Finn started towards the door.

 

“You aren’t going to say goodbye to them?”

 

Finn shook his head.  “I checked in with the General and Commander Tico earlier.”

 

Rey gave him an annoyed glance.

 

Finn leaned in.  “It’s complicated, Rey.”

 

“Not if you don’t make it complicated,” she hissed.

 

Finn huffed.  “You know that’s not true.”

 

“And you know you’re making it worse!”

 

Finn brushed a quick kiss to Rey’s cheek.  “Rose won’t look me in the eye these days and Poe is annoyed that I’m leaving.  I really don’t see how…”  Finn shook his head.  “Look, it’s not like I’m leaving forever.  I’ll be back.”

 

Rey frowned.  “Fine.  But hurry back.”

 

“Will do,” Finn said, throwing her a quick salute before sending C-3PO a nod and leaving.

 

**# # # #**

 

“Hey?  Commander?”

 

Rose quickly wiped her eyes and turned to see Poe jogging up to meet her at the mouth of the cave.  “Yes, sir?”

 

“Poe,” he said.  “I’m so kriffing tired of _General_ and _sir_.”

 

Rose smiled despite herself.  Wiping her eyes again, she walked towards him.  “Yes, Poe?”

 

He nodded towards the passage to command.  “Come on,” he said.  “I want your opinion on some things.”  As she got close he reached over and gave her a quick hug.  “I want to put those problem-solving traits of yours to use.”  Poe then added, “And I want to plead my case about the necessity of caf.”

 

Rose laughed.  “Would you rather have fuel or caf, Poe?”

 

“That’s a trick question, right?”

 

**# # # #**

 

They worked the farms about eighteen hours a day.  It was exhausting, and as they rode the transport back to the prison facility, Jess usually just leaned back and let the it jostle her, too tired even to wipe the mud from her face.

 

But today, Bode and Piper had been pestering her for stories and she’d gotten caught up telling them about the prison break at Megalox Beta.

 

“The droids had disabled the gravity shields and we were the only ones with gravity belts.  Made it pretty damn easy to get Grakkus out of there.”

 

Bode laughed as the transport hit a particularly rough patch of road.

 

“Then what,” Piper pried.

 

Jess looked over at the young woman—seventeen or eighteen at the most, Jess figured.  “Then, we started to escape, but Poe realized that Terex was attacking the prison, so we went back.”

 

“You went back,” Bode asked.

 

“Yeah,” Jess said, a faint smile on her face.  “Poe has this thing about collateral damage, doesn’t like it.”

 

“Even the likes of Megalox Beta?”

 

Jess chuckled.  “Even the kriffing prison guards who’d turned on us!”  She shook her head.  “He’s a big one for doing the right thing.”

 

“And that’s why the Resistance is dead,” said A’truna, a Cerean with a nasty scar on her cheek.  “It was led by spineless dreamers who didn’t realize how the galaxy worked.”

 

Jess would’ve thought she was too tired to start something, but then she heard herself say, “You’d know a lot about being spineless, wouldn’t you?”

 

A’truna made to rise but one of her firends put a hand up to stop her.

 

Jess said, “And the Resistance is rebuilding.”

 

“Oh, and I’m sure they’re going to come and rescue us all,” A’truna said.

 

“No,” Jess said.  “We’re gonna have to figure that one out ourselves.”

 

A’truna harrumphed.  “No one’s escaped this camp since it was built.”

 

Jess smiled.  “Well, then, it’s about time someone did.”

 

A’truna groaned at that.  “You’re gonna get yourself killed.”

 

Jess crossed her arms and leaned back against the metal wall.  “We’ll see.”

 

Piper stared at the small woman, who seemed so confident, despite their surroundings.  She turned to look at A’truna, who was whispering with some of the other prisoners and shooting nasty looks in Jess’ direction.  “She’s got it out for you,” Piper whispered.

 

Jess opened an eye.  “Yeah.”  She made a mental note to watch her back around A’truna’s friends.

 

“You aren’t worried?”

 

Jess sighed.  “Not a lot of good that’s gonna do me.”  _Although it is going to make getting out of here trickier_.  She smiled over at Piper.  “Don’t worry.  I’ll figure something out.” 

 

Piper leaned back, imitating Jess’s stance.

 

Jess couldn’t help but smile. 

 

 


	7. Whisper in the Night

 

 

Rose raised an eyebrow as she scanned the list on the datapad.  She walked over to where Poe was studying the latest intel on First Order movements.  She cleared her throat.

 

Poe turned.  “Mmmmm-hmmmmm?”

 

She held out the datapad with an unimpressed look.

 

Poe’s eyes darted from the pad to her and back again.  “So, what I’m I lookin’ at?”

 

“General,” she said.  “As much as I sympathize with your situation—”

 

“Caf is a necessity,” Poe practically whined. 

 

Rose closed her eyes and took a deep breath.  _Never meet your heroes_.  “Sir, as I was saying—”

 

Poe let out a theatrical sigh.  “There’s gotta be a way.”

 

Rose shook her head and then made a show of removing caf from the essentials list and returning it to the non-essentials list.

 

“Ow,” Poe said.  He clutched his chest as if he’d been shot.

 

“You’ll thank me when we have more than ration bars to eat,” Rose said, walking back to her station.

 

“You’re no fun, Commander,” Poe called after her.

 

“Nope,” she called back with a smile.  As she returned to her duties, she chanced a glance over at the General.  Over the past few days, he’d been calling her in on more and more decisions and while he was certainly playful, he did actually listen to her.   _And I’m pretty sure he’d follow Kaydel into the pits of hell._

 

Kaydel walked over.  “I’m sending you that intel we got about a possible food supplier.”

 

Rose nodded.

 

Kaydel then whispered, “And if you slip in one bag of caf and we keep it under lock and key, we could get that man to do anything we wanted.”

 

Rose wore an evil grin as she said, “We should be getting it tomorrow.”

 

Kaydel chuckled as she walked back to her station.

 

Poe watched the two women, profoundly grateful to see Rose laughing.  Now that he was General, he was somewhat out of the loop as far as gossip was concerned, but he knew that Rose was upset.  From what he’d been able to guess, it wasn’t only the loss of Paige—as if that wasn't bad enough—she was also pining.  Poe sighed.  _Rey is so kriffing lucky_.

 

He then blinked.  _Speaking of which…_   He asked the room, “Anyone seen Rey today?”

 

“Training,” Koo said.

 

“You sure?”

 

“She’s always training,” Rose added.

 

Kaydel nodded.  “I honestly don’t think she sleeps.”

 

“You’re one to talk,” Poe said.

 

Kaydel raised an eyebrow at him.

 

“Fine.  I am too.”  He shrugged, deciding to go find the Jedi and check in.  “The Resistance never sleeps.”  He turned back to the room.  “Good motto.  We should think about using it on the next set of recruitment posters.”

 

Koo chuckled.  “The Resistance never sleeps.  They barely eat and there’s no caf.  Sign up today!”

 

Poe shook his head.  “You’re way too cynical, Commander.”

 

**# # # #**

 

Finn waited until he and C-3P0 were back in their quarters before leaning into the nearest wall and groaning, loudly.

 

“Master Finn, I’m sure that—”

 

Finn put up a hand and slowly turned towards the droid.  “Finn.  No _master_.  We’re the same kriffing rank, Threepio.”  He ran a hand up his face, rubbing his temple.

 

“Yes, of course, mas…Col…Finn,” the droid said.

 

Finn pushed off the wall, walking to a table in the middle of the space.  He sat down next to it, scrubbing his face with his hands.  _What in the kriff am I supposed to tell them?_

 

“Sir?”

 

Finn closed his eyes, feeling his headache worsen.

 

“Finn?”

 

Finn shook his head.  “I really don’t want to have to comm back to Poe with nothing.”

 

“I wouldn’t say it’s nothing, sir,” C-3P0 countered.

 

Finn sighed.  “Fine.  Yes.  Clan Eldar is willing to talk, but they want to play it safe, and they aren’t willing to be the only ones explicitly standing up against the Order, so they’re reluctant to outright join us.  But the other clans aren’t being receptive and basically, no one is willing to make the first move.”  He turned to the droid.  “It’s a stalemate.”

 

C-3P0 raised his arm as if to debate that point before pausing and lowering it.  “I’m afraid you’re right, sir.”

 

Finn huffed out a breath.  _First mission is an absolute failure.  Great._ He put his hands to his temples rubbing.

 

There was a knock on the door.  Finn looked over at C-3P0 and whispered, “We expecting anyone?”

 

The droid shook its head.  “No, sir.”

 

Finn got up, calling out, “Yes?”

 

The door slid open and a small woman entered.  She looked nervous.  “Colonel,” she said.  “Excuse me for intruding.”

 

“No, not at all,” Finn said.

 

“After the meeting this afternoon, I expect that you’re a bit…frustrated with how things are going.”

 

“You could say that.”

 

She offered him a small smile.  She held out a datachip.  “I’m hoping this might help.”

 

Finn took the chip and as he looked up to thank the woman, she was already out the door.  Finn looked to C-3P0, raising an eyebrow.

 

“Oh dear,” the droid said.

 

“Let’s see what’s on it,” Finn said, plugging it into his datapad.

 

**# # # #**

 

Rey didn’t know how long Poe had been standing there, watching as she swung her lightsaber in a series of moves over and over again, but as it finally registered that he was there, she jerked out of her routine. 

 

“Sorry,” he said.  “Didn’t want to interrupt.”

 

“Is something wrong,” Rey asked, slightly breathless from the workout.

 

Poe shook his head.  “Just thought I’d check on you, see how everything is going.”

 

Rey started to give him the standard _I’m fine_ , but instead, she frowned and said, “Something…something’s happened.”

 

“Something good?  Something bad?”

 

Rey shook her head, walking over to her bag and hoisting it over her shoulder.  “I don’t know.”  She walked back over to Poe.  “I keep getting these sensations and…and…”  She groaned.  “I feel like if I train harder or meditate longer, it will come to me but…”  She balled her hands in frustration.

 

“Hey,” Poe said.  “You’re doing amazing.”  He reached out and put his hand on her shoulder.  “We wouldn’t be alive if it weren’t for you, and you’ve only been doing this…what?  A few months?  Give yourself some time.”

 

“But we don’t have time,” Rey said, far more fiercely than she intended.

 

To Poe’s credit, he didn’t flinch or move away.  He gave her a soft smile and squeezed her shoulder.  “I have faith in you, Rey.  And yeah, our backs are up against the wall, but…but you’ve gotta have faith that this is going to work out.”

 

Rey smiled and nodded towards the path back to base.  Poe let his hand fall off her shoulder and they started forward.

 

“So why are you so chipper this morning,” Rey asked.

 

Poe shrugged.  “Everyone is getting along, and we’ve actually got a base up and running.”  He bumped his shoulder into hers.  “And right now, your man is out there getting us new allies.”

 

“Finn is not _my_ man,” Rey said.

 

“Oh,” Poe said, “I didn’t mean to offend you or—”

 

Rey smiled brushing it off.  “No, I just…”  Rey stopped and turned to stare at Poe.  “I think beings have been making a lot of assumptions instead of just talking to each other lately.  Don’t you?”  _Please get the hint, Dameron._

 

Poe nodded.  “You’re right.”  _She doesn’t want anyone to know_.  He gave Rey one of his practiced General smiles. 

 

Rey fought against rolling her eyes.  _Not me, you idiot._   She started forward again. 

 

**# # # #**

 

Finn and C-3P0 stared at the datapad.  They’d both read the information several times, but neither had spoken.

 

Finally, Finn looked over to the droid.  “Sabine Wren?”

 

The droid leaned closer.  “Oh yes,” C-3P0 said, accessing his memory banks.  “Sabine Wren.  Mandalorian.  Clan Wren.  Imperial defector.”  Finn smiled.  “She was eventually recruited by Hera Syndulla as part of the Spectre Unit.  She and several other members of the group disappeared after the Battle of Endor.  Supposedly, they all went their separate ways, but…”

 

“But?”

 

“There were always rumors,” C-3P0 said. “It was a small group, very close, and,” the droid paused for a moment, “it always seemed to me that they would’ve kept in touch, maintained some form of contact.  Both with each other and with the leaders of Rebellion.”

 

“Explicit contact?”

 

“Perhaps not, sir, but…”

 

Finn had come to realize in the past few days that for all of the ways that everyone seemed to see the golden droid as this fretful, ineffectual worrywart, in reality, there was probably no other being as well suited to this kind of mission as C-3P0.  The droid was well versed in Rebellion and Resistance history, and he was a diplomat; besides, Finn thought to himself, _the droid knows all of the best secrets_.  “So, what you’re saying is that if Sabine Wren and the other members of the Spectre Unit were still alive, there would be a very good chance they’d be keeping tabs on us.  Yes?”

 

C-3P0 looked around, clearly worried that he might be overheard.  He tottered closer to Finn, who leaned in.  “That is precisely what I’m saying, sir.” The droid did his best approximation of a shrug.  “Of course, this is all based on rumor and supposition.  Perhaps hopeful thinking, but…”

 

Finn looked back down at the datapad.  “But there’s a chance that this is legit.”

 

“Yes, sir.”

 

Finn studied the information for another moment before looking up, “Then, I think you and I need to make a little trip.”

 

**# # # #**

 

She’d fallen onto her cot sometime in the middle of the night, exhausted, hoping for sleep, but it didn’t come easily.  And when it did, her sleep had been plagued with bad dreams—vines twisting around her ankles, pulling her down, down, down.  Finn screaming her name. 

 

She kept trying to respond, but she couldn’t make a noise.  She was gulping, gasping, trying to call out to Finn, but nothing ever came.

 

And then, all at once, she was standing in _his_ room.

 

She immediately went into a defensive stance.

 

He stared at her, the same unemotional look he usually wore.

 

Rey stared back at him, trying to school her face into something neutral and hating that her horror showed so easily.

 

“You’re alive,” Kylo Ren said.

 

“Why wouldn’t I be?”

 

“There weren’t many of you left, and—”

 

“And so you thought the rest of us would just shrivel up and die?”  _Are you an idiot?_

 

_No_ , he thought at her and she could feel his anger rising.  But he stopped himself and then thought at her, _we’re going to find you.  We’re going to find you and we’re going to end the Resistance._

 

_No, you’re not._

 

_There’s too few of you left and not enough resources._   He laughed.  _You know it’s true.  I can feel it._

 

“GO AWAY,” she screamed, and the link severed.

 

Rey pushed herself off her cot, shaking, hoping that no one had heard her.  _I can’t stay here._   Tears streaked her cheeks.  She picked up her lightsaber and started out, telling herself that there was no way he could still be watching her—even though it felt like he was.

 

**# # # #**

 

Poe looked at the three women sitting around the conference table with a mixture of awe and exasperation.  Between Kaydel, Rose, and Koo, they had pretty much figured out how to keep the Resistance running for another few months, but they were dealing with razor thin margins of error and a few less-than-reputable sources.  Not to mention that all three of them were holding his caf hostage.  He’d been amazed they’d managed to find any, actually.  _But one kriffing cup a day is not enough for…_

 

Poe sighed, staring back at them.  _Pick your battles, Dameron_.  Poe rubbed his hands over his face and looked at the chrono across the way.  “What say we table the rest of this for tonight and get some sleep?”

 

“We can keep working if you’d like to sleep, General,” Koo said, so sweetly that anyone other than Poe might not have caught the dig.

 

Poe sighed.  “Commanders, Colonel, I understand that the Resistance wouldn’t exist if it weren’t for you, but I’m also well aware that between the three of you, you’re getting about two hours of sleep a night.”

 

“We can handle it,” Kaydel said, not looking up from her datapad.

 

“Connix,” Poe said, “one day soon one of you, or kriff, all three of you are going to collapse and then where will we be?”

 

“Not going to happen,” Kaydel said.

 

Poe snorted and she looked up.

 

“Sir, with all due respect—”

 

“With all due respect, Colonel, I’d like to remind the three of you that I outrank you.” 

 

Kaydel’s eyes got momentarily wider.

 

“And,” Poe continued, “while I might have a…shall we say, _looser_ command style than Leia, it doesn’t mean I can’t pull rank.”  Poe stood, shifting into his _serious_ voice.  “You’re all going to get at least four hours of sleep tonight.  If you don’t want to all take it at once, do it in shifts, but if I hear that any of you tried to work through the entire night, I’ll…”

 

Rose smiled and lifted an eyebrow.

 

“I’ll think of something,” Poe said, utterly flummoxed.  He shook his head.  “For crying out loud, I’m trying to get you to sleep!”

 

“Fine,” Rose said, “I’ll take first shift.”

 

“Thank you!”  Poe stared at Kaydel and Koo.  “Was that so hard?”

 

“I’ll take second shift,” Koo said.

 

“And I’ll take third,” Kaydel said, winking at the General.

 

Poe groaned and walked out of command.

 

Kaydel put down her datapad.  “He’s right.”

 

Rose looked down at the table.  “When we’re busy, it’s…”

 

Koo sighed.  “It’s like we don’t have to think about it.”

 

“I hate being alone in my bunk,” Kaydel said.

 

“Me too,” Rose said.

 

Koo stretched and stifled a yawn.  “But he is right.”

 

“Although he’s getting less sleep than we are,” Rose said.

 

Koo lifted an eyebrow.

 

“He paces at night,” Rose said.  “Through the parts of the cave system we haven’t moved into yet.”

 

Kaydel frowned.  “It’s hard when there aren’t any beings to take up the slack.”

 

“And when the guy you love is out on assignment,” Rose added.

 

Koo and Kaydel shared a look.

 

Rose shook her head.  “Not me.  The General.”

 

“Oh,” said Kaydel.  “I didn’t know you knew.”

 

“I’m pretty sure the only being that doesn’t know is Finn.”

 

Koo laughed.  “That’s usually the way.”

 

As Koo’s laughter died down, the three stood there, thinking about love and lonely bunks and all of the beings who weren’t with the Resistance anymore.  A pall fell over the group.

 

“I should go sleep,” Rose said, already walking towards the door.

 

“See you in four hours,” Koo called after her.

 

Kaydel picked up her datapad but she didn’t really see what was on it.

 

And somewhere, deep in the passageways, Poe ran his hand along the stone walls of the cave and tried not to think about all the beings who were counting on him.

 

**# # # #**

 

The next morning, a good portion of the Resistance was standing out on their makeshift tarmac, welcoming a new ship.  “Hello,” Maz called from the top of the ramp of her small transport.

 

“Hello,” Poe called out.  “It’s good to see you!”

 

“It’s good to see you too,” she said, coming down and pulling him into a hug.  She stepped back.  “You look like hell, General.”

 

“Thanks, Maz.”  The rest of Maz’s group started to descend.  “Welcome to the Resistance,” Poe said.  “This is Kaydel and this is Rose. They’re going to help you get settled, assign you somewhere, and they’re the ones to go to with any logistical questions.”  He smiled.  “We’re really grateful you’ve all decided to join us.”

 

He nodded to Maz and the two of them started towards command. 

 

“Leia sends her regards.  She’s gone to the Anoat sector to try to find Calrissian.”

 

“Think he’s there?”

 

“I think if they start looking, they’ll find him.”

 

“Cryptic as ever,” Poe said.

 

Maz stopped walking and grabbed Poe’s arm.  “Now, tell me about you.”

 

“What about me?”

 

Maz cocked her head to the side.  “How is being a General treating you?”

 

Poe chuckled.  “It’s terrible,” he said, rubbing a hand over his face, “but I’m glad I’m here to do it.”

 

Maz smiled.  “I like that attitude.”

 

“What other attitude would I have, Maz,” Poe asked.

 

“Some people seek rank out.  I don’t think you’ve ever been one of those.”

 

Poe shook his head.  “No, ma’am.”

 

“But you know you can handle it, all the same.”

 

“Yes,” Poe said.

 

Maz laughed and pulled Poe along towards command.  “Exactly.”

 

“So, I pass muster?”

 

“You passed muster with me a long time ago, Dameron.”

 

Poe smiled and pulled her into a quick hug.  “Okay, then, now that the approval process is through, why don’t you tell me what’s on your mind?”

 

Maz looked around the command center.  “Is this it?”

 

“For the time being,” Poe said.

 

“Where’s the Jedi?”

 

“Training.”

 

Maz stared at Poe, so he added, “She’s nearly always training.  She’s…she’s trying to figure out her place in all of this and I’m giving her space.”

 

Maz nodded.

 

“And where’s Finn?”

 

Poe said, “He and Threepio are on Mandalore trying to make an alliance with one of the clans.”

 

“Hmmmmmm,” Maz hummed.  “My guess is they’ll have a hard time of it.”

 

“That seems to be the case,” Poe said.  He crossed his arms.  “Maz, quit stalling.”

 

She stopped, still trying to take in how small the Resistance had become.  “You need bodies.”

 

“Yes, we do.”

 

“But you also need to make sure that if the Order attacks, they don’t wipe you out.”

 

“Not much to wipe out these days, but yes,” Poe said, leaning against a console.

 

“I think my people should stay here and I should too.  For a time.”

 

Poe lifted an eyebrow.

 

“You’re going to need other bases.  Other groups.”

 

“And you’re offering to set one up for us?”

 

Maz nodded.  “I’ve been around long enough to know how to make these things happen, and I have a few locations in mind.”

 

Poe studied her.  “I don’t doubt it.”  He thought for a moment.  “It’s a bit ahead of our schedule,” he started.

 

“I’m not leaving yet,” Maz said.  “You still need help here, but when the time is right…”

 

“I think it’s a great idea,” Poe said.  “And I guess that leads to my next question, which is where do you see yourself fitting into the command structure.”

 

Maz sighed.  “Honestly, I don’t.”

 

“That’s gonna make things harder.”

 

“I know.”  She shook her head.  “What rank were you thinking?”

 

“Colonel,” Poe said.  “That would mean you’d answer to me and me alone.”

 

Maz nodded.  “I’ll take it.”

  
“Good.”

 

“Now,” Maz said.  “Why don’t you show me what you’ve got up and running so far?”

 

**# # # #**

 

Poe found her sitting at the top of the hill that housed their base.  She’d wrapped her arms around her legs and was staring off into the distance towards New Jedha City.  Poe sat down beside her, leaning back onto his hands.  He studied her.  It was dusk and the light served to bring out the color in her cheeks.  It was easy to see why Finn would be attracted to her.

 

She wore a frown and her eyes were narrowed, as if she were watching for something on the horizon.  Poe had a bad feeling about this conversation before it even began.  “Did Maz find you?”

 

She smiled—something easy and true.  “Yes, and we had a good talk.”  For a moment, Poe thought that perhaps everything was in his head, but then Rey took a deep breath.  She bit her lip.  “I need to leave.”

 

Poe closed his eyes.  _Not yet._   “If you don’t mind me asking, why?”  Rey turned to him, and he could see her warring with herself.  “You don’t have to tell me.”

 

“No, it’s just that…”  She looked down.  “How much did Finn tell you?”

 

_I do not want to have this conversation._ Poe swallowed, reminding himself he was an adult and the kriffing head of the Resistance.  “About you and him?”

 

Something passed through her eyes and she smiled again, for just a second.  “No,” she said, looking back out towards New Jedha City.  “About me and Kylo Ren.”

 

Poe felt, at once, better and worse.  “You and…”

 

“We have a, a…bond.”

 

“A bond?”

 

“We can communicate sometimes.”

 

“Kriff,” Poe said, tensing, feeling the need to run to command and tell everyone to evacuate. 

 

Rey must’ve sensed his anxiety because she grabbed his arm.  “No.  He can’t see anything more than me.  He doesn’t know where we are.”  Poe let out a relieved breath.  “But…”

 

“But?  There’s a _but_?”

 

“I still think it would be safer if I wasn’t here.”

 

“Rey,” Poe started.

 

Rey shook her head.  “No, let me finish.”  Poe nodded.  “There’s another thing.  I’ve…I’ve felt others.”

 

“Others?”

 

“Other Force sensitives.  They’re out there, and if I can feel them…”

 

“He can too,” Poe said, feeling suddenly sick at the prospect of Ren recruiting.  Or worse, kidnapping.

 

“I need to go out and try to find them and…”  She hugged her legs a bit tighter.

 

“Train them?”

 

She gave a mirthless laugh.  “Because I have so much training.”

 

“I think you’d surprise yourself.”

 

She leaned her cheek on her knees and looked at Poe.  “I don’t know the first thing about being a Jedi.”

 

“So, don’t be a Jedi.  Be something else and help them be something else too.”

 

She smiled.  “So now, you’re the optimistic one.”

 

Poe shrugged.  “It’s been a good day.  The Resistance nearly doubled in size.”

 

Rey laughed.  She moved her chin up onto her knees and looked out at New Jedha City again.  “I’ll need a transport.”

 

“Did you ask Maz?”

 

“Do you think she’ll let me?”

 

“I think so.”

 

Rey nodded.

 

They both stared out into the landscape as the twilight turned to night.

 

“When do you think you’ll leave?”

 

“As soon as possible,” Rey said.  “I…”  She put her head down again.  “I need to get away from here.”

 

Poe reached out and put his hand on her back.  “Just remember that when you want to come back, you’ll always have a place here.  You’re part of the family.”

 

“Thanks,” Rey said.

 

Poe pushed up, leaning over to place a light kiss on her head.  “Take care of yourself and keep in contact, okay?”

 

“Yes, General,” Rey said.

 

Poe groaned at the title and headed back inside.

 

Rey pulled her arms even tighter around herself and watched as the lights twinkled from the city in the distance.

 

**# # # #**

 

Iolo looked around at the grasslands that surrounded the rock formation they’d landed next to.  Everywhere, as far as the eye could see, it was beige.  Iolo sighed.  “So, now what?”

 

“Now,” Kes said, putting his binoculars down.  “We set up camp and wait.”

 

“How long,” Iolo said.

 

Karé shoved him.  “We just got here, nerfherder.”

 

“Yeah, but…”

 

“Let’s give it a few days at least,” Kes said. 

 

Iolo sighed and started back to his X-Wing for his pack.  He hated that he’d gotten his hopes up.

 

Kes raised an eyebrow at Karé, who shook her head.  “Lo,” she said, jogging over.  “What’s up,” she whispered.

 

“If Poe made it off of Crait, he would’ve had more than enough time to get here, and, and, and…”  He leaned in.  “I don’t like just sitting here doing nothing.”

 

“You mean, like we were on Crait?”

 

“Fine,” Iolo said.  “But now that we’re here and,” he held his arms out wide, gesturing to the vast sea of nothingness surrounding them.

 

“Lo, we can’t just—”

 

“Karé, I get it.  It’s his dad, but at some point, we’re going to have to face facts, and what the facts are telling us is—”

 

“Incoming,” Kes yelled.

 

Karé and Iolo ran towards him and saw where he was pointing.  A small craft was coming in for a landing nearby.

 

“Friendly,” Kes asked.

 

Iolo shook his head.  “Don’t know.”

 

“Then, I say we make ourselves scarce,” Karé said.

 

“Good idea,” Iolo said.

 

“Kes, you take that point,” Karé said, nodding to their north.  “Iolo, you go east and I’ll go west.”  The three of them scrambled to take their positions as the ship landed.

 

**# # # #**

 

“Poe said you’re leaving,” Rose said as Rey put the last of her things on Maz’s transport.

 

Rey nodded.  “I need to…I think there are others like me out in the galaxy and I think I should go find them.”

 

Rose nodded.  She bit her lip and then walked up the ship’s ramp.  “I think you should start with Canto Bight.”

 

“Canto Bight?”

 

Rose nodded.

 

Rey gave the other woman a strange look.  “Just a feeling you have?”

 

“Yeah,” Rose said and then she met Rey’s eyes.  “No… But I’m not…”

 

Rey smiled.  “Maybe you and Maz should talk while I’m away.”

 

Rose nodded, suddenly feeling overwhelmed by the implications of what Rey was saying.

 

**# # # #**

 

Rey came into command to find that it was deadly silent.  She was ready to take off and had come back to say her last goodbyes.  Then, she saw one of the screens they’d set up at the far end of the room.

 

Six beings were lined up, kneeling.  Their hands were caught in binders behind their backs and every one of them was dirty, dried blood and who knows what else staining their clothes and their faces.

 

General Hux’s voice came on over the image, “Today, we show you what happens to those who would resist the First Order’s rule in the galaxy.  Today, we show you what happens to traitors and terrorists.”

 

A Stormtrooper walked out brandishing a laser axe. 

 

“Today, we show you that the First Order will brook no opposition, and that this is what will happen to those who disobey.”

 

The axe came down.

 

Poe jumped.

 

Koo’s hands flew to her mouth to cover a scream.

 

Rose started shaking, trying hard not to remember what it was like to have one of those things humming just over your head.

 

Hux kept talking, but Poe didn’t hear it.  Instead his whole being was focused on the fourth prisoner in Hux’s group.  “Kaydel,” he whispered, “is that?”

 

Kaydel started nodded.

 

Dabrey Sinns had been a technician, out on assignment with the cruiser _Defiance_.  Poe closed his eyes as the Stormtrooper made it to her.  He heard Rose, Koo, and Kaydel as the axe came down and that was his limit.  He spun on his heel and marched out of command, trying to get his breathing under control.

 

_Jess was attached to that ship._

 

His hands were shaking.

 

_Fucking hell._

 

Every fiber of his being wanted to jump in an X-Wing and find the nearest First Order outpost and fire on it until there was nothing left.

 

Rey’s hand landed gently on Poe’s back, but he still startled.  She leaned in.  “They’re going to need you.”

 

Poe nodded, wiping his eyes.  “Those are our people,” he said.

 

“I know,” Rey said.  She sighed.

 

He turned and walked back into command, to find a stunned silence in the room.  Koo was crying into Kaydel’s shoulder.  Several other beings were hunched over, hiding their faces.

 

Poe took a deep breath.  “I wish I had something to say that would somehow make this better.  I wish I could tell you something to comfort you right now.”  He swallowed hard.  “But about the only thing I can tell you is this: when it comes down to it, you have those beings in the galaxy who would line up the beings who disagree with them and execute them in front of a crowd and you have those beings who will fight against that kind of behavior with their dying breaths.”  He wiped a tear from his eye.  “I know that we may be down and we may be hurting, but if we give up, then shit like that is gonna continue until there’s no one left, so you can be sure as hell that I’m not gonna back down and I’m not gonna give up until we wipe the First Order out of this galaxy once and for all.”

 

“Let’s get those bastards,” Kaydel said.

 

The atmosphere in the room turned, from shock and grief to anger.

 

Poe nodded.  “Okay, let’s get back to work.”  He reached over and squeezed Rey’s hand.

 

She looked up at him and squeezed back.

 

 


	8. The Defiant

 

 

Amir clutched his drink a bit tighter and clenched his jaw, keeping his smile firmly in place.  Since Alli’s death, these family functions had become nearly unbearable.  He looked around the room.  Keesa and Kaya were fawning over some low-level First Order officer, keeping him busy while Father and Mother hammered out a deal with his superiors.  In the old days, all of this would’ve been done through middle-men, but with the destruction of the Republic and the near eradication of the Resistance, there was no more reason to hide.

 

Amir threw back his drink and walked back to the bar for another.

 

“Careful, brother,” Asha said, slinking up beside him.  “You know you can’t hold your drink.” 

 

Amir eyed his older brother carefully.  “Does it really matter?”  He jerked his head back.  “Looks like the deal is all but done.”  He grabbed his new drink from the servant and gulped it down.

 

His brother chuckled.  “You’d think you’d show a little more gratitude for the process, brother.  Or do you think those drinks just magically appear, at your whim?”

 

Amir clutched the empty glass in his hand, hating himself but hating his brother more.  “Those are the bastards who killed Alli,” he hissed at Asha.

 

Asha rolled his eyes.  “Alli had no business being in the Hosnian System, and while his passing is tragic, business is business.”  There was something dangerous in Asha’s eyes as he leaned in and whispered, “And you’d do well to remember that none of our lives are worth much if we start causing trouble.”  It was as close to brotherly love as Asha was capable.

 

Amir gave a curt nod, handed off the glass to one of the countless servants who seemed to materialize when needed, and said, “Tell Mother and Father I wasn’t feeling well.”

 

Asha nodded.  “Of course,” he said.

 

As Amir started out of the room, he heard the officer flirting with his sisters brag, “The Supreme Leader gave the order this morning.  By the end of the week, Bespin and Endor will be obliterated.”

 

Amir’s sisters laughed and cooed over the news.

 

Amir quickened his pace, fearing he might really be sick.

 

**# # # #**

 

A figure emerged from the transport and started scanning the area.

 

Kes squinted from his hiding place and then he felt a whisper of hope bloom in his chest _._  “Nien Nunb?”  Kes came out from behind the rock formation.  “That you?”

 

“Yeah,” Nien answered, squinting up at Kes.  “Dameron?”

 

Kes started laughing.  “Nien kriffing Nunb!”  _I knew you were alive, Poe!_  

 

Nien was pretty sure he was going insane.  _There’s no kriffing way that he’s here._

 

Kes scrambled down the formation and over to the Sullustian.  “Nien!”  He jogged over, taking Nien’s hand and shaking it vigorously.  “It is good to see you.”

 

Karé and Iolo followed.  “I take it this means that the Resistance is still alive,” Iolo asked, a huge smile on his face.

 

Nien knew his mouth was hanging open, but he was having trouble remembering Basic in his shock at seeing all three of them.  “Uh, yeah,” he said.  His eyes met Kes’s.  “Poe sent me.”

 

Kes closed his eyes and said a quick prayer of thanks, plucking the ring he wore around his neck off his chest and giving it a quick kiss.  Karé and Iolo hugged each other.  Nien shook his head, still trying to convince himself this wasn’t a dream.

 

“Nien, is Snap…”  Karé bit her lip.

 

Nien shook his head.  “Don’t know.  Not with us.”

 

She swallowed hard.  Iolo grabbed her shoulder, squeezing. “That doesn’t mean anything, Kun.”

 

She nodded, turning away and wiping her eyes.

 

Iolo asked, “Who else?”

 

“C’ai, Nodin, and Cassian, as far as the pilots go.”

 

“Kriff,” Iolo said.

 

“Lot of beings out on assignment though,” Nien added.  “We’re still trying to reach out, establish contact.”

 

Iolo nodded, not trusting his voice.

 

Kes read the mood and tried to sound optimistic as he slapped Nien on the back and said, “So, let’s talk about getting back to see Poe and the others.”

 

**# # # #**

 

Finn stepped out of the transport and frowned.  “So this is Bandomeer?”

 

“Yes, sir.  Although I do believe it is different near Bandor, but…”  The droid scanned the desolate, rocky terrain.  “It is quite empty.”

 

Finn grabbed his binoculars and scanned the area.  He grimaced.  This was starting to feel more and more like a trap.  He looked over at the droid.  “Stay near the ship.  I’m going to have a look around.”

 

“Sir, are you sure—”

 

“I’ll be fine, Threepio.”  _I hope._

 

**# # # #**

 

Veronat was hot and humid and Leia wondered why she’d thought her usual wardrobe would suffice—years of living with Han had given her more than a glimpse of the galaxy’s less-than-reputable corners and that usually meant dirt, grime, and extreme weather conditions.  Smugglers, pirates, and shady businessmen rarely did business in pleasant weather.

 

She and Chewie had been sweating in a cantina on the dingier side of Tropis-on-Varonat waiting for a friend-of-a-friend who supposedly had information on Lando’s whereabouts.  Leia gripped her blaster tightly under the table, trying to maintain a cool façade.  Chewie did his best not to roll his eyes.  He trusted his friend and he trusted that most species in the galaxy didn’t want to piss off a Wookiee.

 

Leia tensed as a figure in a long, hooded cape entered the cantina and Chewie warbled out a low warning to relax.  She ignored him and watched the figure, who slowly maneuvered through the dimly-lit place.  “He’s coming,” she said, but Chewie didn’t turn to watch.  She envied his calm.

 

The figure stood in front of their table and said in a low voice, “I heard you were looking for Lando Calrissian.”

 

Leia’s heart nearly stopped.  _Lando, you son-of-a…_   She swallowed hard.  “Yes, we are.”

 

“Then, might I suggest we take this meeting elsewhere?  There are a lot of disreputable types in this place.”  The figure leaned forward far enough so that Leia could watch him wink.  She simultaneously wanted to hug him and slug him.

 

“Lead the way,” Leia said. 

 

**# # # #**

 

Twenty minutes later, after twisting through enough back alleys and side streets to make her head spin, Leia was seated in the back of a non-descript housing unit on the outskirts of Tropis-on-Varonat.  Lando had taken off his hood and was sitting, studying her and Chewbacca.

 

Leia raised an eyebrow.

 

Lando raised one.

 

Chewie rolled his eyes and warbled out an annoyed grunt.

 

“Fine,” Lando said, leaning forward.  “I figured it was safest to go into hiding.”

 

“That’s a good idea,” Leia said.  “Ben seems to be targeting important Rebellion sites.”  She didn’t miss the way Lando’s eyebrow had quirked up at Ben’s name.  “My guess is he’ll also be pursing friends and associates of mine and Han’s.”

 

“And I’m number one on that list.”

 

“Yes, you are,” she said.  She leaned forward.  “I’m guessing that by you meeting us that…”

 

“That I’m saying I’m ready to get back into the fight?”  Lando laughed.  “Don’t think I have much choice, do I, your highness?”

 

“I don’t think any of us do.”

 

Chewie growled in agreement.

 

“So then,” Lando said, “what’s your plan?”

 

Leia smiled.  “What makes you think I have a plan?”

 

“When have you not had a plan?”

 

Chewie stifled a chuckle.

 

“Fine,” Leia said.  “How many of Han’s old…associates do you think might be willing to stand up against the Order?”

 

Lando leaned back in his chair, considering.  “A lot of those beings have retired or died.  The ones that are left are still around because they were smart enough to stay outside of galactic politics.”

 

“So, none of them?”

 

“I didn’t say that,” Lando said.  “I just…”  He tapped his finger on his leg.  “I think a better question might be, how many of our old friends can we convince that…Kylo Ren is unstable and likely to cause them trouble?”

 

“You have some beings in mind?”

 

“I do,” Lando said.

 

“Good,” Leia said.

 

Lando’s eyes narrowed.  “It’s bad, then, I take it.”

 

She nodded.

 

“Any reason you’re here instead of back whatever the rest of the Resistance is holed up?”

 

“One, because I was fairly certain you wouldn’t show yourself to anyone but me or Chewie.”  Chewie warbled his agreement.  “And two, because…because it’s time for a change.”  She shook her head.  “It’s hard living up to the stories.”

 

Lando nodded. “Especially when half of them aren’t true.”

 

Leia smiled.  “Yes, but…”  She sighed.  “The galaxy needs new stories, new heroes.  Fresh blood,” she said, looking into her old friend’s eyes and finding an understanding there.

 

Lando nodded and rose.  “Let me make some calls, put out some feelers.  We should be safe here for a few days and then, we’ll set out.”  He stopped and cocked his head.  “Where’s your ship?”

 

Chewie told him.

 

“The Falcon?  She’s here?”  Lando looked flummoxed, happy, and profoundly annoyed.  “That shrinks our timetable a bit.”

 

“Ben will leave the Falcon alone,” Leia said.

 

“You sure about that?”

 

Leia nodded, a faraway look in her eyes.  “Yes.  That’s about the only thing I’m certain of.”

 

**# # # #**

 

“So,” Kaydel said, coming up beside Poe as he wandered the outer perimeter of the base, “you’re allowed to lecture us on not sleeping, but…”

 

“Do as I say and not as I do, Colonel,” Poe said with a smile.

 

“You know you need your sleep, right?”

 

“Yeah,” Poe said.  “Just…”  He shook his head.  “It’s not like flying.”

 

“Huh?”

 

“When you’re in a dogfight, there’s about a thousand little things going on and you have to be hyper-aware of all of them and,” Poe shrugged, “if you’re good, you just get into this rhythm and…”  He shook his head, searching for words.

 

“It’s like the Force,” Kaydel said.

 

“Yeah, I guess.”  He stopped walking.  “But with this, it’s like a million different things and, and…”  He sighed, running a hand through his hair.  “And I can’t handle all of them, as much as I might want to—”

 

“That’s what we’re here for,” Kaydel said.

 

“And I’m grateful.  Really.  None of this happens without you and Koo and Rose.”

 

“But,” Kaydel asked.

 

“But,” Poe said, clearly tired and worried, “It still feels like there are things we’re missing, things we should be doing and…”  He put both hands on top of his head and stared out into the darkness.  “I can’t let this…”  He closed his eyes.  “We have to make this work.”

 

“We will,” Kaydel said, unnerved by the way everything since Starkiller seemed to have changed.  Especially Poe.  Poe was always the one who was giving optimistic speeches and patting people on the back, assuring them that things would work out, and while he was still doing that, now, there was a darkness that had settled over Poe Dameron that truly unsettled Kaydel.  _Maybe he’s always been like this?_

 

Poe looked over at her, squinting in the darkness, trying to make her out.  “What?”

 

Kaydel was torn.  Finally, she decided just to say it.  “Poe,” she started, before she realized she didn’t know how to ask.

 

Poe gave a strange laugh and lowered his hands.  “It’s okay, Kaydel.”  He reached over and playfully pushed her shoulder.  “I…I…I…”  He laughed again, starting back down the path.  “I’m the happy one, right?  Only, now I’m not and…”  He suddenly stopped.  “Fuck, Kaydel, I _…”  I am not about to unload on her, not out here in the middle of the night._

 

“Poe,” she said.  “What is it?”

 

He shook his head.  “No,” he said, starting back towards base.  “It’s fine.”

 

“Poe,” she said, staying still.  “Please.”

 

He turned, looking back, and he could barely make her out.  He slowed and then stopped.  He let out a long sigh and started back towards her.  “We have three medics, Kaydel.  None of them have any experience with…”  He licked his lips.  “With mental trauma.”  His breathing hitched for a moment.  “And even if they did, we have a whole base full of traumatized beings.  I mean, that would fill their every waking moment and—”

 

“So that means you don’t get to feel?”

 

“I’m in charge now,” Poe spit out.  “I get to feel when everyone else is asleep.”  Poe made a noise and turned, looking out into the darkness.  “Not like it will change anything,” he muttered.

 

Kaydel suddenly realized that this went far beyond the stress of starting a new base.  “Poe,” she whispered, suddenly terrified, “what happened to you?”

 

Part of Poe’s brain was screaming that he needed to shut up and tell her to go to sleep, but then he heard himself blurt out, “There wasn’t time,” he said. 

 

“Time?”

 

Poe shook his head.  “Kaydel, it’s late, and—”

 

“Poe, there was no time for what?”

 

Poe closed his eyes.  “Look, Kaydel, it’s…it’s complicated.”

 

“Poe,” she said again.  “Please.”

 

Poe opened his eyes and Kaydel felt as if he was staring into her soul.  “Things on Jakku.  They…they went bad.”

 

“Bad,” she whispered.

 

“I was captured and, and…”  He breathed out.  “The Order wanted the map.”  _Please understand what I’m trying to say._

 

“And that’s when Finn showed up,” Kaydel said, suddenly unsure about the story Poe had been telling since he’d come back.

 

“Yeah,” Poe said.  “Eventually.”

 

_Eventually_.  Kaydel closed her eyes, careful not to curse out loud.

 

“They wanted the map and…”  Poe gave a strange laugh, running a hand through his curls.  “I beat Leia’s record with an interrogation droid, so I guess I’ve got that going for me.”

 

“Oh Poe,” Kaydel whispered.  She started to reach out and he backed away from her.

 

“And when that didn’t work…”  Poe blinked, his eyes looking far away and for a moment, Kaydel was afraid she’d lost him.  She reached out again, about to touch Poe’s arm when he seemed to shake himself out of it.  His voice was nearly normal as he said, “Then Finn was there, and he rescued me and—”

 

“Poe,” Kaydel said, taking his arm.  She looked up at him, searching his face.  “How long before Finn came?”

 

Poe swallowed hard.  “Kaydel,” he breathed out.

 

“How long,” she said.

 

Poe shook his head.  “I…I…”  He closed his eyes, stretching his head back.  His voice broke as he said, “A few days, I think?  I, I…blacked out.  Can’t be sure.”

 

“Fuck,” she whispered.

 

Poe just sort of crumpled to the ground, falling on his butt.  He brought his hands up to the sides of his face and started rocking as he talked.  “After the droid, Hux sent in some Stormtroopers, and they,” he stopped moving, hugging his arms to himself, “they were good.”  He breathed out.  “Then Ren came and, and, and…”  He sucked in a long breath.  “He got what he wanted.”  He hung his head.  “I thought they were gonna kill me.  I thought I’d betrayed Bee and the galaxy and,” he looked up at Kaydel, who was standing in front of him, tears burning her eyes, “all of you.”  He reached up for her hand.  “I thought I’d signed your death warrant.”

 

“Fuck, Poe,” Kaydel said, coming down in front of him and pulling him into a hug.  “And then, Finn is there.”  Poe gave a chuckle as tears streaked his cheeks.  “Wonderful, kriffing Finn!  And he needs a pilot, and the next thing I know, he and I were breaking out and…and we’re crashing and I’m in the desert, sure I’m going to die before anyone finds me, and then it’s Takodana and then Starkiller and then the evac and…”  He hiccupped back a sob.

 

Kaydel felt cold.  In any spare moment they’d had after Starkiller, Poe had told anyone he could about the miraculous Finn who’d broken him out of the _Finalizer_ , but he’d never once mentioned the torture, never once told the story as anything other than a grand adventure that ended with him and Finn running into each other’s arms on D’Qar.   _Of course, they kriffing tortured him._

_And of course, he didn’t tell anyone about it._

 

Kaydel was shaking as she hugged Poe again.  “Fuck, Poe,” she repeated, because she didn’t know what else to say.   

 

He leaned into it.  “There was no time,” he murmured.

 

“I know,” she whispered, patting his back.  “I know.”

 

**# # # #**

 

He’d been walking out in the rocky terrain for about twenty minutes when Finn heard the scrape of a boot on rock and spun. There were three humanoids, concealed behind intricate wrappings and armor, pointing blasters at him.  Finn raised his hands.

 

“What are you doing here,” one of them asked.

 

“I’m Colonel Finn with the Resistance.  I’m trying to find Sabine Wren.”

 

The smallest of the three stepped forward.  “And what’s your business with her?”

 

Finn nodded in the direction of the transport.  “My associate and I were on Mandalore, trying to find allies, but—”

 

“But no one will make a move until someone else does,” the humanoid said.

 

“Yeah,” Finn smiled, “but then someone handed me a datachip, said Sabine Wren was here and that she might help.”

 

The tallest of the three asked, “So the Resistance is rebuilding?”

 

“Trying,” Finn said.

 

“And how do we know this isn’t a trick?”

 

“Honestly, I don’t know.  I’ve only been with the Resistance a few months.  Before that—”

 

“Wait!  You’re FN-2187,” the tall one said.

 

Finn grit his teeth.  “My name is Finn.”

 

The smallest one said, “But you used to be FN-2187, right?”

 

“Yeah.  How…”  _How would they know that?_

 

“You should come with us,” the smallest one said.

 

“What about my associate?”

 

“We’ll send someone for them.”

 

Finn lowered his arms and followed the three into a maze of rocks.

 

**# # # #**

 

They hadn’t spoken for at least an hour.  They’d just sat in the darkness, Kaydel holding onto Poe and rocking the two of them.

 

Eventually, though, Poe said, “Let’s go get something to eat.”

 

She nodded and they silently made their way to what currently served as the mess.  By the time they sat down, Poe was wearing his usual smile.

 

Two minutes later, he was joking and trying to lick the juice of some kind of fruit—Poe hadn’t thought to ask its name—off his arm.  While Kaydel was trying to laugh along with him, she couldn’t help thinking that he might break at any moment.

 

“Connix,” Poe said, his eyes still on the fruit.  “I’m fine.”

 

“No, you’re not.”

 

He looked over at her.  “Fine,” he said, rubbing his eyes.  “I’m not fine.  And it’s gonna be a long time before I am, but…”

 

“But?”

 

“None of us are fine,” Poe said, gesturing around.  “We’re all dealing with some—”

 

“You were tortured,” Kaydel said, a bit louder than she intended.

 

He winced.  Then, he took a deep breath.  “Yeah, and Finn was brainwashed and Rey grew up starving on a junkyard planet.  Leia lost her husband and brother within a week of each other.  Rose’s sister is gone.  C’ai lost a brother and his partner and…Do you want me to keep going?”

 

“No,” Kaydel said.  “But it doesn’t change the fact that—”

 

“I’m not trying to downplay it, I’m just…”  Poe sighed.  “I’m not gonna break.” 

 

“You might, if you don’t get some kriffing sleep.”

 

Poe picked up a mug of something cloudy and grey, taking a sip.  “But you can handle not sleeping?”

 

“My General ordered me to get some sleep, and I have been,” Kaydel said, leaning back with a self-satisfied smirk on her face.

 

He smiled at her, one of those genuine eye-crinkling smiles that made everyone fall a little bit in love with him.  “Fine,” he said.  “I will try to sleep—”

 

“No.  You _will_ sleep,” Kaydel said.

 

He chuckled.  “Fine.  I will sleep.  I’ll even go talk to Elieth, see if he has anything that will help.”

 

“Good.”

 

Poe smiled into his mug.  “Thanks.”

 

“We’re family.”

 

“Family,” he whispered.  He took another drink before sighing.  “I think all of us have been keeping things inside.  And I don’t know.  Maybe the rest of you have better ways to deal with it but…  It’s…"  He chewed his lip for a moment.  "I’m not used to the…I’m not used to Black Squadron not being here, and Bee can only listen to so much.”  Poe looked up.  “But seriously, it was good to talk.”

 

Kaydel nodded.  She spared a moment’s thought wondering if Pava, Wexley, Karé, and Iolo might still be alive before she said, “For what it’s worth, I think you’re right.  We’re all feeling the pressure.”

 

“It’s easier when you have a mission or if you’re in the middle of a battle, you can just focus on that, but…”

 

“But the downtime sucks,” Kaydel said, taking a bite of fruit and laughing as it dripped down her chin.

 

“And just so you know, I actually do think this is gonna work.”

 

She looked up at him, and he looked a lot like the Poe she used to know, so much so that she could almost believe him.

 

Seeming to read her mind, he said, “Seriously, Connix, we’ve accomplished a lot in the last few weeks.  Hell,” he said, motioning around, “we have a mess!”

 

She smiled and nodded.  “We do have a mess.”

 

Rose walked in on the far side of the space and picked up some fruit and bread before joining them.  “Good morning.”

 

“Morning,” Poe said.

 

Rose studied them.  “Did either of you sleep?”

 

“No,” Kaydel said.

 

“Nope,” Poe said.

 

Rose rolled her eyes.  “I don’t suppose that if I told you to get some sleep that—”

 

“I’ll take a nap later,” Kaydel assured her.  Then, they both turned towards Poe.

 

“After we have the morning briefing,” he said, raising his hands in surrender.  “I know better than to go up against you two.”

 

“Good,” Rose said, biting into her bread.  “Speaking of which, I had an idea I wanted to run past you.”

 

“Yeah,” Poe asked.

 

“I know that we need to be careful about communications, so we don’t give away our location, but Koo and I have been working on something and…and I think it could work.”

 

“What?”

 

“I was thinking that we should start broadcasting a Resistance signal, some sort of message to the galaxy not to give up hope.  We could put it up remotely, so if they did trace it, it wouldn’t lead back to us, but…”

 

“But it would be a way to tell people that while we’re down, we’re not out,” Poe said.  He smiled.  “I like it.”

 

Rose smiled.  “Koo and I will work up the preliminaries later today.”

 

Poe nodded and then turned to Kaydel, “See?  I told you this was gonna work.”

 

“Just eat your breakfast, General,” Kaydel said with a smile.

 

**# # # #**

 

He followed the three beings for what felt like hours until they finally crept into a passage between the rocks and then down into a cave.  _It’s always caves these days_ , he thought.  As the passage opened onto a large space, he gasped.  It looked a lot like the old base on D’Qar.  There were dozens of beings at consoles and all sorts of equipment.  “Kriff,” he breathed out.  _You are so much better off than we are_.

 

The shortest of the three laughed and took off the wrappings that had been covering her head.  The woman shook out a shock of short pink hair and held out a hand.  “Sabine Wren.

 

Finn smiled.  “Finn.”

 

She nodded and pointed to a console.  “Bayla, can you pull up those bounties the Order just distributed?”

 

A series of images of most of the remaining members of the Resistance flashed on the screen.  Finn flinched as Poe’s face and then Rey’s flashed by.  “Can you show all of them on the same screen,” he asked.

 

The screen flickered and then, he was looking at about fifty bounties.  _Leia, Rose, even the droids._   Then, his breath caught.  There he was, listed as FN-2187.  Finn’s hands balled into fists.

 

Sabine reached over and put a hand on his arm.  “I figure you must be doing something right to get that kind of attention.”

 

Finn relaxed a bit.  He looked around.  “So, what is this place?  What’s going on here?”

 

“Well,” Sabine said.  “After the war, most of us went our separate ways.  We all had our reasons for laying low, but over the past few years, we kept hearing rumors.”

 

“More than rumors,” came a deep rumbling voice from the side of the room.

 

Finn turned to spy a tall humanoid covered in purple fur.  He blinked.  He’d never seen a being of that species before.

 

“Colonel Finn of the Resistance, let me introduce you to Garazeb Orrelios.”

 

“Call me Zeb.”

 

Finn held out his hand and Zeb shook it.

 

“Zeb tracked me down just before the Hosnian System,” Sabine said.  “I’d already been talking to beings, recruiting.  Turns out, he had been too.”

 

“Easy enough to see the writing on the wall,” Zeb said.

 

“Why not just try to find Leia?”

 

Sabine said, “We’ve always worked best _outside_ a formal command structure.”  Zeb and Sabine shared a look.  “And we had _other_ reasons for wanting to keep a low profile,” she said.

 

There was something there that Finn knew he was missing.  “And now,” he asked.

 

“And now,” Zeb said, “I don’t think any of us have much choice.  With the Republic gone and…”  He rubbed a hand over the back of his neck.

 

“And with the Resistance nearly dead,” Finn finished.

 

“Yeah,” Zeb said.

 

“When one of my people on Mandalore said that you were there, I figured it was a good opportunity,” Sabine said.  “I guess the question now is how do we work together moving forward.”

 

Finn said, “Well, I have some ideas about that...”

 

 


	9. The Believers

 

 

“No, no, no, wait,” Ega said, shaking her head.  “You’re saying that he flew into a hole in the side of the thermal whatsit—”

 

“Thermal Oscillator,” Snap said, smirking as he polished a bolt they’d salvaged that morning.

 

“Yeah, and he flew around, inside the thing and…”  She was shaking her head again.

 

“Blew a bunch of stuff up and then flew back out,” Snap said, laughing.  “That’s what we do.  We blow stuff up and save people.”

 

Nyss said, “Wow.”

 

Ega shoved him.  “Really?  _Wow_?  That’s it?”

 

Nyss smiled and shrugged.  “Wow.”

 

Ega turned to Allet, “And you?”

 

“I’m still trying to figure out how the thing worked,” Allet said in zirs quiet voice.

 

“I can’t help you there,” Snap said.  “I’m just recon and flying.”

 

“But you’ve been around,” Nyss said, a hint of wonder still in his voice.  “You fought in the Rebellion too.”

 

Allet’s eyes grew wide.  “You did?”

 

Snap nodded.  “I was about your age, actually.  And it was just at the end.  Battle of Jakku and stuff.”  _I’m so kriffing old._

 

“Wow,” Allet said.

 

Ega rolled her eyes.  “Guys, seriously!”

 

Nyss playfully shoved her.  “We’re in the presence of greatness, Ega!  Show some respect.”

 

“Yeah,” Allet said, joining in, “respect your elders.”

 

Snap groaned.  “Okay, that’s it.  Back to work,” he said.

 

Nyss and Ega gumbled but they both wore smiles. 

 

Allet smiled and threw him a salute.  “Yes, sir.”

 

Snap watched the three of them move back around the shop and smiled.  It wasn’t much, but three bodies were better than none, and with the reports about Endor and Bespin, beings were getting worried.  _We’re gonna do this_ , he thought, hoping that somewhere out there, the Resistance was waiting for him and his new unit to show up.

 

**# # # #**

 

“Um, General?”

 

Poe would never admit that it still usually took him a few seconds to realize that that meant him and not Leia.  “Yeah?”  He looked up from the diagram he’d been studying with Rose.

 

“Ummmmm,” Kaydel started over.

 

Poe whispered, “Be right back,” to Rose and jogged to meet her.

 

Kaydel frowned, holding a datapad close to her chest.

 

Poe fought the urge to roll his eyes and ask _what now?_   Instead, he gave her a half-smile and reached for the datapad.  He scanned over it.  “What am I looking at?”

 

“An old Republic friend of mine put me in touch with someone and…and he wants to meet?”

 

“Meet?”

 

“You,” Kaydel said.

 

Poe shook his head and gestured around.  “Kind of running the Resistance here, Connix.”

 

“Yeah, and I wouldn’t be bringing it to you except,” she pointed to the datapad, “look at the name.”

 

_Amir Rennal._

_Why does that sound familiar?_

_Rennal._

_Rennal._

_Rennal._

 

“Kriff,” Poe breathed out.  He looked up at Kaydel.  “As in?”

 

“The very same.”

 

“Kriff,” he said again, reading the information more closely.

 

“And he wants to meet with us?”

 

“Specifically, you,” Kaydel said.

 

Poe tensed at that.

 

“I know,” Kaydel said.  “I’d be inclined to just turn him down flat, but…”

 

“But that’s a lot of money,” Poe said.  The Rennal family were famous.  Infamous really.  They were the richest of the rich and they’d made that money off of the last few wars, selling to both sides.

 

Poe frowned.  “But, he can’t…”  _There’s no way one of the Rennals breaks rank._

 

“Amir’s youngest brother,” Kaydel said.  She grabbed the datapad and flicked through the screens.  “Alli,” she said.  “He died on Hosnian Prime.”  She handed the pad back.  “Most of the family has been willing to look the other way as far as the Order is concerned, but Amir…”  She shook her head.  “He’s different.”

 

“Or at least that’s his story,” Poe said.

 

“I believe him,” Kaydel said.

 

That was enough for Poe.  He took a deep breath.  “When does he want an answer?”

 

“In the next day or so.”

 

“Kriff.”

 

“General,” Koo called out.

 

He couldn’t help himself.  “Yeah, now what?”

 

“We have a transport inbound.  Colonel Finn requesting permission to land.”

 

No on in command missed the way Poe’s face lit up at that.

 

“Well, give it to him.”  Poe turned back to Kaydel.

 

She shook her head.  “Go,” she said.  “We’ll talk about this later.”

 

“Thanks,” Poe said, already taking off towards their makeshift tarmac.

 

**# # # #**

 

“Finn,” Poe yelled as soon as Finn stood at the top of the ramp.

 

Finn smiled and started down towards Poe, trying not to think too hard about how much he’d missed the other man.  The two of them crashed together in a quick hug, chuckling, and Finn felt something strange in his stomach—like nerves, but nicer.

 

Poe pulled back, keeping his hands on Finn’s arms.  “You didn’t say much in your last transmission.”

 

“No,” Finn said, looking back towards the ramp where C-3P0 was cautiously tottering down.  “I figured this news needed to come in person.”

 

Poe was worried for a moment and then he spied a third passenger.  A tall, purple…  _Is that a Lasat?  Is that…_   Poe’s eyes went wide and he looked at Finn.

 

“Um, General Dameron,” he said, stepping away from Poe and gesturing up the ramp, “I’d like you to meet—”

 

“Garazeb Orrelios,” Poe squeaked.

 

“I see my reputation precedes me,” Zeb said, coming down the ramp.

 

Poe let out an undignified laugh and then ran up to the Lasat.  “Sir, it’s an honor,” Poe said, holding out his hand.

 

“Zeb,” Finn said, “This is General Poe Dameron, head of the Resistance.”

 

“Dameron, eh?”

 

“Yeah,” Poe said.  “My parents fought in the—”

 

Zeb smiled.  “I know who your parents were,” he said.  “Good soldiers.”  He looked around.  “So this is it, eh?”

 

“Yeah,” Poe said.  “Still re-building.”

 

Zeb nodded and Poe gestured towards the entrance to the base.  “So, I mean…”  Poe shook his head, trying to find the words.

 

“How come I’m back?”

 

“Yeah,” Poe said.  “Most reports were that…”  Poe shrugged.  “After Endor, no one knew if you guys were alive or dead or what.”

 

“After Kanan and then…”  Zeb shook his head.  “I think once the war was finished, we figured we’d all earned some peace and quiet.  Besides, Sabine didn’t want to attract too much attention.  Neither did Kal.  So, we stayed out of politics and out of the limelight.”

 

Poe nodded.  “Well, we’re happy you’re back.”

 

“Oh, that’s not all,” Finn said. 

 

“What?  You got us more guns?  More ships,” Poe asked with a wry smile.

 

“Damn near,” Finn said as they walked into command.  “Sabine Wren has a cell set up on Bandomeer.”  He looked over at Kaydel.  “I’ll give you the codes.  She’s got about sixty or seventy beings there and a full set up.”

 

“Better than this dump,” Zeb muttered.

 

Rose put her hands on her hips and opened her mouth when Poe interjected, “Rose, Kaydel, Koo, I’d like you to meet Garazeb Orrelios.  _From the Rebellion_.”  He gave Rose a look, telling her to cool it.

 

“It’s nice to meet you, sir,” Koo said, holding out her hand.

 

“Hello,” Rose said through clenched teeth.

 

Kaydel cocked her head to the side.  “I thought you were dead.”

 

Zeb laughed.  “Not yet.”

 

“Anyway,” Finn said.  “They’re ready to start coordinating with us, even share some supplies.”

 

 _Sabine Wren and Garazeb Orrelios._   Poe was just about ready to float away.  _This is too good to be true_.  “Fantastic,” Poe said.  “Although things may be turning around on that front.”

 

“Oh,” Finn said, looking around.  _Where’s Rey?_

 

“Yeah,” Poe said, “but I guess we should call a formal meeting of command staff and do this right.”  He looked around the room.  They were all there.  Poe opened his mouth.

 

“Where’s Rey,” Finn asked.

 

Poe felt blindsided.  “Oh yeah,” he said.  _Should’ve seen that coming_.  He reached into his pocket and pulled out a datachip.  “She left this for you.”

 

“She’s gone?”

 

Poe could hear the hurt in Finn’s voice.  “Yeah, buddy, she…I guess she was worried about the Force bond with Ren and—”

 

Finn was outraged.  “And you just let her go?”

 

“Buddy, I don’t think _I_ had the power to _let_ her do anything.  This was her choice.  Besides, she thinks there are other Force-sensitive beings out there, and she wants to get to them before Ren does.”

 

“But…”

 

“Finn,” Poe said, putting a hand on his shoulder.  “Just see what she’s told you, okay?”

 

Finn nodded and started back towards his quarters.

 

Poe watched him, wishing he could get over this stupid, damn crush.  _I guess the meeting can wait._   He turned to their new guest.  “Zeb,” he said.  “Why don’t I show you around?”

 

**# # # #**

 

Rey was smiling and waving into a holocamera.  “Hello, friend!”  Her smile almost instantly fell.  “I’m sorry,” she said.  “I know you’re going to feel like I ran away again, and I sort of did, but…”  She shook her head.  “We had another…bond?”  She sighed.  “I think I may be a danger to the Resistance if I stay, and,” she put her hand up, trying to silence Finn before he could speak, “and I know what you’re going to say, but I think it’s better this way.  Besides, I can feel other Force-sensitives out there, and I need to get to them before Ren does.”  She smiled again.  “Besides, I think we both know I can take care of myself, right?”  She laughed.  “But I want you to take care of yourself and,” she got a sly look on her face, “look after Poe too, okay?”

 

Finn blushed at that.

 

“I’ll be checking in when I can.  And I mean it, Finn.  You better take good care of yourself, okay?  No heroics.  No nearly getting killed.”

 

“You either,” Finn whispered at the blue-glowing image of Rey.

 

She smiled again.  “I love you.”

 

“Love you too,” he said.

 

She waved again, and the image cut off. 

 

Finn closed his eyes and leaned his head forward into his hands.  _Why can’t we ever be in the same place at the same time?_

 

“Colonel,” Koo said from his doorway.

 

Finn jerked his head up.  “Yeah?”

 

“The General is calling a meeting of command staff.  Sent me to get you.”

 

Finn nodded and stood.  “Of course.”  _Duty calls._

 

**# # # #**

 

“Maz,” Zeb chuckled.  “What are you doing here?”

 

“Garazeb Orrelios,” Maz said with a wide smile, crossing to the far side of command.   “I was wondering when you were going to show up!  Where’s Sabine?”

 

“Out on Bandomeer.”  He leaned in to give Maz a hug and then whispered, “And doing far better than this lot.”

 

Maz slapped his arm.  “Considering how badly the Order hit them, they’re doing just fine.”

 

Zeb nodded and sat down.  “Why aren’t you on Takodana?”

 

“Had some trouble myself,” she said.

 

“So,” Zeb started.

 

“So, what’s left of my most loyal staff are here and I’m helping the Resistance find suppliers.”

 

“Karabast,” he said under his breath.

 

Maz reached over and took his hand, squeezing it.  “Don’t worry.  Poe knows what he’s doing.”

 

Zeb looked over at the man standing at the head of the center table.  He was talking to a group of humans—none of them looked to be out of their twenties.  Zeb said, “I don’t doubt him.   Knew his father.  Saw his mother fly.”

 

“Then, you know.”

 

“Yeah,” Zeb said, quietly.  “But it was supposed to be over.”  He thought of Kal, suddenly missing his husband more fiercely than he had in a long time.

 

Maz nodded.  “You live long enough, it all repeats.”

 

“Yeah, it does,” Zeb whispered.

 

**# # # #**

 

“Okay,” Poe said, looking around the table.  “I think this is everyone.”  He straightened his shoulders and took a breath.  “Here is the latest.  We only have limited intel on Endor and Bespin, but from what little we were able to scrounge up, this isn't another Starkiller."  There were relieved sighs from around the room.  "More like coordinated attacks from several dreadnaughts.  The planets are still there, but..."  Poe took in a deep breath.  "But, almost everything is destroyed."  There were some worried rumblings throughout command.  "But, on a happier note, Maz, Rose, and Kaydel have been reaching out to possible suppliers and things are starting to look up on that account.  Ships, fuel, and weapons are going to be our biggest priority moving forward.  Well, and recruitment.”  Poe pulled up a map of the galaxy.  “To that end, Leia and Chewie are trying to find Lando Calrissian in the Anoat sector.  From what our new recruit, Zeb Orellios, has told me, Sabine Wren has about sixty beings set up on Bandomeer and she’s going to travel back to Mandalore on our behalf and see if she can get something started there.”

 

“She’s done it before,” Zeb muttered.

 

“Rose has also come up with a plan,” Poe looked over at her and nodded.

 

“Koo and I have figured out how to set up a series of transmitters to broadcast a remote Resistance signal.  This wouldn’t be for communications but to get our message out.  Namely, that we aren’t dead and that we’re looking for beings to join up.”

 

There was a general murmuring of approval around the table.

 

“We expect it to be up and running within the month,” Rose said.

 

“Thanks,” Poe said.  “I know it’s hard to sit around waiting, but we are slowly gaining new members, and to that end, I’ve talked a bit with Zeb, who is going to start helping with the training of our ground troops.  With the beings that Maz brought and our new recruits from Jedha, we actually have enough bodies to start training.  Zeb, I’ll want you to coordinate with Finn and Tansirch on that.”

 

Tansirch nodded to the Lasat, who nodded back.

 

“And that brings us to the good news,” Poe said.  “We’ve been contacted by a wealthy benefactor who may have a new source of funding for us.”

 

“Who is it,” Finn asked.

 

“Amir Rennal of the Rennal family.”  There were a number of whispers around the table.  Poe put up his hands.  “I know that they aren’t exactly the most trustworthy of families and that they’ve sold to both sides in the past.”

 

“And are probably still selling to the Order,” Maz added.

 

“But,” Poe said, “ _he_ reached out to us and he seems genuinely interested.  There’s a good chance there’s a schism in the Rennal family, and if there is, I’d like to take advantage of it.”

 

“So how do we meet him,” Finn asked.

 

Poe winced.  “That’s the tricky part.  He wants to meet with me, alone, on Phu.”

 

“What,” Finn said, and there were several other murmurs of discontent at the table.

 

“I know it’s not ideal, but—”

 

“You’re actually considering going,” Finn asked.

 

“Yeah,” Poe said.  “It might be the boost we need to finally get some real ships and weapons and—”

 

“With all due respect, _sir_ ,” Finn said.  “I thought the whole point of creating a command structure was so that our commanders are the ones directing movement.  Aren’t you the one who said we shouldn’t be out in the field?”

 

Normally, Poe wouldn’t let it get to him, but he was operating on zero sleep, and Finn throwing his own words back at him was just a bit too much.  “And I’ll remind you, _Colonel,_ ” he said, trying to keep the anger out of his voice and failing, “that you were the one who told me that we don’t have enough beings in the Resistance at this point to make that distinction.”

 

Finn snorted and Kaydel jumped in.  “Rennal won’t talk to anyone but Poe.”

 

“It could be a trap,” Finn said.

 

“At this point, I’m willing to take that risk,” Poe said.

 

Finn slammed his hands on the table and walked away.

 

For a beat, the whole room was silent.  Then, Poe grit his teeth and said, “Rose, why don’t you fill us in on the weekly supply memo?”

 

**# # # #**

 

Rose found Finn jogging around what had become their gymnasium.  She crossed her arms, watching him and when he came close enough, she asked, “And what was that?”  Finn didn’t stop jogging, so she called out, “I’m not going to chase after you, Finn.  I can wait.”

 

He slowed and then stopped, putting his hands on his thighs, panting.

 

She walked over.  “I repeat, what was that?”

 

“It’s an idiotic plan, Rose,” Finn said.

 

“We’re kind of desperate, Finn.  Once Chewie’s and Leia’s money runs out, we’re stuck.  This guy reached out to a friend of Kaydel’s, and she thinks it’s legit.”

 

Finn snorted.

 

Rose walked over and got into his face.  “Do you really want to question Kaydel’s ability to—”

 

“I’m not questioning Kaydel!  I’m just not happy about one of my friends walking into a trap!”

 

“Poe can take care of himself,” Rose said.

 

“Yeah,” Finn bit out.  “He ever tell you about how we met?”

 

Rose looked at Finn for a beat, shook her head, and started out.

 

Finn closed his eyes with a sigh.  _Real fucking good_.  “Rose!  Wait!”  He jogged after her.  “Wait.  I’m sorry.”

 

Rose turned back around, still clearly pissed off.

 

“I’m just…”  He let out a long breath.  “Come on, I can’t be the only one who sees what a bad idea this is.”

 

“Rennal will only talk to him,” Rose said.  “Trust me, Kaydel, Koo, and I have been over this a thousand times.”

 

“He jumps into things without thinking,” Finn said.

 

“No, he doesn’t,” Rose countered.  “He’s been doing so much thinking and worrying, and…”  She groaned.  “He really has thought this through.  We all have.”

 

Finn groaned.  He knew she was right, but he couldn’t shake the panic he felt at the idea of Poe going out there alone.

 

Rose asked, “Finn, have you ever considered that maybe there’s something else going on?”

 

“Like what,” Finn asked.

 

Rose raised an eyebrow.  “Like maybe your feelings about him—about this whole situation—aren’t completely professional?”  Finn squinted.  Rose groaned.  “You aren’t this dense, Finn!”

 

Finn started to argue the point and then something clicked.  _Oh._

_Oh kriffing hell._

 

Rose nodded.  “Yeah, that’s what I thought.”

 

**# # # #**

 

“Okay,” Poe said.  “In my absence, Kaydel, you, Threepio, and Rose are in charge.  Just…”  Poe pressed his lips together and clear worry crossed his face.  “Just don’t let it all fall apart until I’m back, okay?”

 

Kaydel shot him an unimpressed look.

 

Poe leaned in.  “If I worry about you guys, I don’t have to think about the fact that there’s a chance this is a trap.”

 

Kaydel gave him a soft smile and put her hand on his arm.  “We’ll try to keep things going, General.”

 

He smiled.  “Thanks, Colonel.  When the war is over, remind me to buy you a drink.”

 

“Among other things,” she said.

 

Poe looked around the tarmac once, and Kaydel nearly said, _he’s not here_ , but thought better of it.

 

“May the Force be with you, sir.”

 

“You too,” Poe said, climbing up the ladder into the X-Wing.

 

 


	10. Ashes to Ember

 

 

“Ma’am,” Koo said, “we have four ships coming in and…”  Koo seemed to be listening to something.  She then burst into a huge smile.  “Nien Nunb and friends requesting permission to land.”

 

Kaydel grinned.  “Give them permission and tell Finn he’s back.”

 

“Will do.”

 

**# # # #**

 

Finn stood watching as two X-Wings and two transports came in for a landing.  He looked over at Kaydel with a huge smile.  “Looks like we picked up some strays.”

 

“Yes, it does,” Kaydel said, barely containing her excitement.

 

Nien came out of his transport first, waving at the group.  C’ai Threnalli and Nodin Chavdri were already running towards him.

 

Finn laughed.  He couldn’t remember the last time everyone was this excited.

 

As the hatches popped on the X-Wings, Kaydel’s eyes grew huge.  “Karé!  Iolo!”  She started running towards them and soon, a gaggle of pilots and ground crew were huddled around the X-Wings.

 

Zeb came out of the cave entrance and stood next to Finn.  “You aren’t going to say hello?”

 

“New to the Resistance,” Finn said.

 

“But you’re a Colonel.”

 

“Yeah.”  Finn laughed.  “Lots of rapid promotions lately.”

 

Zeb shook his head.  “Some things never change.”  Zeb squinted as a figure came out of the second transport.  He blinked.  Whoever it was looked familiar.  _Real bloody familiar_.

 

The figure walked towards them.  “Any of you seen Poe Dameron?”

 

“No,” Finn said, wondering who the stranger was.  “General Dameron is out on assignment.”

 

“General?”  The man started laughing.  “I know everyone has delusions of grandeur and all, but…”  He turned and yelled over the crowd at Nien, “You didn’t tell me they made him a kriffing General, Nunb.”

 

Finn was starting to get pissed.  _Just who does this moof-milker think he is?_

 

Suddenly Zeb started laughing.  “That’s who you are!  Kes Dameron!”  He reached out.

 

Kes suddenly realized who was in front of him.  “Garazeb Orrelious,” he said in disbelief.  “I…”  He shook his head.  “Who in the kriff isn’t going to show up to this thing?”

 

Finn stood there in shock.  _Dameron._   That meant he had to be a relation, and the best possible guess was Poe’s father.

 

Zeb turned to Finn.  “This is Colonel Finn,” he said to Kes.

 

“Colonel, Former Sergeant Kes Dameron.” Kes said, offering up a quick salute and then reaching out a hand.  “What’s this about my son being out on assignment?”

 

Finn sighed.  “It’s a long story.”

 

Kes sighed.  “It usually is.”  He smiled.  “I don’t know about you, but I could use a drink.”

 

Finn smiled.  “Let me show you to the mess.”

 

**# # # #**

 

An hour later, Kaydel was doing her best to introduce everyone to each other and explain the new ranks to Iolo and Karé.  “I’m sure when Poe gets back, he’ll want to integrate you into the—”

 

Iolo raised a hand.  “We’re just happy to be here, Connix.”  He smiled.  “I mean, Colonel.”

 

Karé nodded over at the table currently housing a Lasat, a guy she’d never seen before, and Poe’s dad.  “Who’re they?”

 

“The purple one is Garazeb Orrelios,” Kaydel said.  “He was with the Ghost crew during the Rebellion.”

 

“Hera Syndulla,” Iolo said.

 

Karé nodded.  “I thought they were all dead.”

 

“Turns out, they aren’t,” Kaydel said.  “Sabine Wren is alive too.”

 

“Kriff,” Kaydel said, drinking whatever it was that was passing for caf these days.  She pulled a face and Kaydel said, “Don’t start.”

 

Karé chuckled.  “Poe is giving you hell about it, isn’t he?”

 

“Every day,” Kaydel said.

 

“Who’s the other guy,” Iolo asked.

 

Kaydel smiled.  “That’s Finn.”  That alone usually garnered a response, but then she remembered that both Karé and Iolo had been out on assignment since before Starkiller.  “Oh boy, do I have a story for you!”

 

**# # # #**

 

Rey frowned as she flew low over the surface of Caonica.  _Another desert._

For a moment, she was filled with the most irrational fear that somehow she was back on Jakku, that she was going to have to go back and live that life again.  She forced herself to take a deep breath.  _It’s not the same._

_It’s different._

_I’m different._

 

She focused in on the coordinates for a landing pad on the outskirts of Canto Bight and thanked the Force that her powers of persuasion seemed to work across comms.  She’d just been given clearance to land.

 

**# # # #**

 

Rey tensed as she left the port, realizing that the biggest city she’d ever visited was Nima Outpost.  “And that doesn’t count,” she muttered under her breath.  Her feet took her over cobblestones and through alleys filled with bright shining lights, but even though it was beautiful, it felt claustrophobic.

 

She could see a casino in the distance and smiled, thinking of Finn’s stories about his adventures here.  She started towards it when she felt a tug, like someone had tied a string around her arm and was pulling just slightly.  She frowned, turning, and started down a street towards an alley filled with rubble.

 

**# # # #**

 

It took her a half-hour to make it to the stables—or what was left of the stables.  Three children were slowly clearing stones and debris while a Cloddogran with a whip stood, yelling at them.  Rey’s temper flared and she marched in.

 

The Cloddogran immediately began threatening her. 

 

Rey’s hand went out and his whip flew out of his hand and into hers.  “You will leave the stables immediately.”

 

“I will leave the stables immediately,” the Cloddogran said in sluggish tones.

 

The children froze, immobile even after he was gone.

 

Rey dropped the whip and ran to the nearest, a girl with red hair.  “Are you okay?”

 

The girl winced, backing up.  Rey stilled.  She knelt, trying to make her voice sound non-threatening.  She looked to the two others, boys, who were staring at her.  “Are you okay,” she repeated.

 

One of the boys started nodding.  “Good,” Rey said.  “I’m here to help.”

 

“Help,” said the girl, still clearly terrified.

 

Rey smiled.  “Yes, help.”

 

She looked at the three children and realized it was the smaller boy whose presence she’d felt.  “You can feel it,” she asked.

 

The boy smiled and nodded.

 

“Would you like to leave here and never come back?”

 

All three nodded, and Rey realized she couldn’t just take the Force-sensitive one.  She closed her eyes.  _I can do this_.  She let out a breath and stood.  “Okay, then.  My name’s Rey.  What’s yours?”

 

The girl said, “Arashell.”

 

The taller boy said, “Oniho Zaya.”

 

The Force-sensitive one said, “Temiri.”

 

Rey smiled.  “It’s good to meet you, Arashell, Oniho Zaya, and Temiri.”  She rose, looking around.  Soon, the Cloddogran would be back and he might bring friends.  “Come on.  We’d better get back to my transport.”

 

The children scrambled to follow Rey as she started off from where she’d come.

 

**# # # #**

 

 _What in the kriff am I doing_ , Rey thought as they wound their way through the city.  She spared a look back at the children.  _I don’t know anything about taking care of children_.

 

She took a deep breath.

 

_I can do this._

_I can do this._

 

Temiri reached over and took her hand, squeezing it and smiling up at her.  “Thank you, ma’am.”

 

 _I can do this._   Rey smiled.  “You’re very welcome, Temiri.”

 

**# # # #**

 

Maz looked up from her tea and smiled.  “I was wondering when you might stop by.”

 

Rose sat down across from her, holding out a hand.  “Rose Tico.”

 

Maz nodded and held out her hand.  “Maz Kanata.”

 

“Rey said I should…”  Rose bit her lip.

 

“She thought you should talk to me because she thinks you might be sensitive to the Force.”

 

“I’m not like her,” Rose said, hoping she didn’t sound bitter.  _Rey is amazing._   _And I’m…not._

 

“No,” Maz said, “not like her, but the Force doesn’t work in all beings the same way.”  She leaned forward.  “Sometimes you just know things, yes?”  Rose nodded.  “My guess is you’re more like me.  You can feel it, perhaps learn to read it, but not wield it in the same way as someone like Luke or Rey.”

 

“Read it?”

 

“If you reach out with your senses, you can almost see it, rippling through the galaxy.”

 

“Can you teach me?”

 

“Of course,” Maz said.  “I’ve just been waiting for you to ask.”

 

**# # # #**

 

 _Just once_ , Poe thought as he ducked into the seedy little cantina, _I’d like someone to set up a kriffing meeting at a spa or a nice restaurant or…_   He sighed. 

 

Poe ordered a drink, trying to ignore how his hands were shaking.  _I’m a kriffing spy_ , he told himself. 

 

_Was. Was a spy._

_Not anymore._

 

He gripped his drink just a bit tighter as he scoped out a dark table near the back.  He hoped Rennal would know who he was, as he had no idea what any member of the family looked like.  _Way too rich for my blood._

 

He threw back most of his drink, wishing he’d ordered something stronger.  He stared at what liquid remained, swirling it around in his cup.  _Please don’t be a trap_ , he thought.

 

A tall guy, about Poe’s age, stalked in, and Poe immediately took notice.  The guy was dressed just like everyone else, but something about him was off—his shoulders were a little too squared, he was meeting other beings’ eyes.  _Are you my guy_ , Poe wondered.

 

The guy was handsome, no denying that.  Close-cropped blonde hair, a sharp jawline, lean.  A few years ago, Poe would’ve been checking him out for other reasons.  _A few lifetimes ago_ , Poe thought harshly, throwing back the rest of his drink.  When the guy looked his way, he locked eyes with him.  The guy smiled.  He walked to the bar and ordered something.

 

A few moments later, he walked over to Poe’s table with two drinks in hand.  He set one down in front of Poe and took the seat across from him.  He gave Poe a nod and took a long sip.

 

Poe stared at the drink and then looked back up at the man.

 

The man raised an eyebrow.  “Not a fan of Whyren’s Reserve?”

 

“Kriff,” Poe said, raising the glass and taking a sniff of it.  “Why not just ask if they have any double-N one-eight-two.”  He took a sip, closing his eyes and letting the whiskey burn down his throat.  It was the most expensive drink he’d ever had in his life.

 

The man laughed.  “They only keep the Reserve here because they know I like it.  Double-N is something they stock at home.”

 

Poe fought hard against rolling his eyes.  He was a colony kid, a rube, compared to this guy.  “Rennal, I take it?”

 

The guy nodded.  “Dameron?”

 

Poe nodded and took another sip.

 

For a moment, they just sat there, enjoying their drinks.  Finally, Poe said, “So…”

 

Rennal looked up at him.

 

“You wanted to meet with me, and here I am.  Let’s talk.”

 

Rennal said, “I was actually going to invite you back to my hotel.”

 

Poe choked on his drink.  “Uh, buddy, I think you might have the wrong—”

 

Rennal rolled his eyes and leaned in.  “Far less listening ears and prying eyes.”

 

Poe sighed.  _Yeah, I should’ve caught that_.  “Fine,” he said, gesturing towards the door.  “Lead on.”

 

Rennal stood and finished his drink.  Poe did the same.  Rennal then grabbed Poe’s hand and flashed him a sly smile.  “Have to sell it, though.”  He placed a quick kiss on Poe’s cheek.

 

Poe’s skin burned, but he plastered a smile on his face, wondering why the galaxy felt the need to torture him like this.

 

**# # # #**

 

Jess stood, frozen, as the Stormtroopers pulled Piper from the lines and drug her back towards their transport.

 

A’truna laughed to those around her.

 

Jess couldn’t hear what she was saying, but her hands balled into fists at what she imagined.  She wondered if A’truna had offered up Piper’s name.  Everyone knew she was working with the Order.  It’s why she had so many friends.

 

_It’s why they’re all scared of her._

 

Jess felt a shove and she rocked forward.  “Get back to work,” one of the guards grumbled. 

 

Jess moved to comply, hoping against hope that Piper’s questioning wouldn’t be too bad.  So far, they’d already lost three beings to overzealous interrogators.

 

 _Not to mention Dabrey_ , Jess thought.  She closed her eyes, as a familiar wave of nausea overtook her.  They’d forced all the prisoners to watch the execution.  Jess still had nightmares about it.

 

As her hands went through the motions of picking, she wondered if anyone else from the ship had fared any better.  She hadn’t seen any of the others in a while, but the prison was huge.

 

These days, she tried not to think too much about the Resistance.  It just made her angry or sad.  Instead, she focused on breaking out of this place.

 

Bode had a good eye—as did Jess—and they’d already managed to see some weaknesses in the system.  But they didn’t have enough bodies to make a move yet.  So far, she knew she could trust Bode, Piper, and a pair of Twi’lek siblings, Isan and Usa’la, that were recent additions to the crew.  She was sure that when they enacted their plan, they’d pick up a few others too.

 

But there was always the lingering specter of A’truna and any other possible informants.

 

Jess took a deep breath.  _I will get out of here_.  She focused on her work, repeating it like a mantra.

 

_I will get out of here._

_I will get out of here._

_And then, I’m going to watch the Order burn._

 

**# # # #**

 

Back at Rennal’s hotel room, which was in a less gritty part of town, but nowhere near as ritzy as Poe had expected, Rennal offered Poe another drink.  “It’s not as good as the Reserve, I’m afraid.”

 

“I’ll manage,” Poe said, figuring it was still better than anything he’d had in months, maybe even years.  Poe looked around.  “You sure this place is clean?”

 

“Swept for bugs earlier and,” he nodded towards a device on the nightstand, “that would tell me if anything’s changed.”

 

Poe tried not to look too in awe of the technology.  “Must be nice to be rich,” he muttered.

 

Rennal laughed.  “It is.”  He pulled off his jacket and sat on the bed, motioning for Poe to take an overstuffed chair nearby.  “So,” he shook his head, “you really came.”

 

“I really did,” Poe said.

 

“I didn’t think you would.”  He downed his drink.

 

“Why not?”

 

“There’s a bounty on your head and,” he quirked an eyebrow, “rumor is you’re running things now.”  He looked Poe up and down and Poe had the strongest urge to throw a punch.  “Hmmmm,” Rennal hummed.

 

Poe cocked his head to the side and then leaned forward.  “Are you trying to piss me off?”

 

Rennal laughed.  “No.  I’m just…you aren’t what I expected, Poe Dameron.”  He raised an eyebrow, hoping that Poe got the message.

 

_Is he coming on to me?_

_No_ , Poe convinced himself.  “Ummmmm, look,” he said, “that’s all fine and well, but I’ve got a base full of beings who are counting on me to get back soon, so what say we cut through all the bantha fodder and get to business.”

 

“Fine,” Rennal said.  He wasn’t going to let on that he was a bit disappointed.  He didn’t necessarily have a type—unless _everyone_ counted a type—but something about Dameron made him want to banter and play.  It felt good after so many weeks of feeling hollow.  He shrugged, putting his empty cup on the nightstand.

 

“I asked for you because you’re the one who took down Starkiller.”

 

“There were a lot of beings who—”

 

“Fine,” Rennal said, “It was a team effort, but you’re the one who fired the shot.”

 

Poe shrugged, taking another drink.  _Doesn’t make me a kriffing hero._

 

“My brother was on Hosnian Prime when,” Rennal looked at his feet.  “He’d been meeting with some Senators.”  Rennal shook his head, wiping his eyes.  He stood and walked back to the bar.  “Want another one?”

 

“No,” Poe said.

 

Rennal leaned against the bar.  “He was the black sheep of the family.  Hated how we made our money, wanted things to change.”

 

“Sounds like a good guy,” Poe said.

 

“He was.  The best,” Rennal said.  He got quiet, lost in memories of his little brother.  After a few seconds, he shook himself out of it.  “After the Order blew up the system, my family decided it was easier to forget him than to sever ties with them.”

 

Poe sighed.  _Sounds about right._   He looked over at Rennal.  “I’m sorry.”

 

“Yeah,” Rennal said, pushing away from the bar and walking back over to the bed.  He sat.  “They signed another deal with the Order last week, and…”  He looked down into his drink.  “Alli was naïve and all…”  He let out a breath.  “But he wasn’t wrong.  And, and…”  He shook his head, tears welling up in his eyes.  “I can’t do it anymore.”  He looked up at Poe.  “That’s why I reached out.”

 

Poe realized that this could all be an elaborate ruse, that this guy could be a really good actor, but something rang true.  His gut told him he could trust Amir Rennal.  He nodded.  “There’s no way to say what I’m gonna say next without sounding mercenary, but what exactly are you offering?”

 

Rennal smiled, taking a long drink.  “Straight to the point.  I like that.”  He finished the drink.  “What I’m offering is my own personal fortune, plus Alli’s, and a few caches of weapons and ammo that I’ve squirreled away over the years.”

 

Poe didn’t want to get too excited yet, but this was potentially game-changing.  “How much are we talking about?”

 

Rennal shook his head.  He stood and grabbed a datapad, handing it to Poe.  Poe started scrolling through the list on the screen and he simultaneously wanted to laugh and cry.  “Holy kriff,” he whispered as he realized he wasn’t even half-way through.  He looked up at Rennal.  “And you can get to all of this?”

 

Rennal nodded.  “Alli didn’t trust the family.  Don’t know why he trusted me, but he did.  I’m the only one who knows where his money is, and even before all of this, I started saving for a rainy day, so to speak.”  He walked to the bar.

 

“Isn’t your family going to be mad?”

 

“Sure,” Rennal said.  “But my hope is that we can transfer most of this to you before they catch on.”

 

Poe leaned back in his chair, scrubbing a hand over his face.  “That might be tricky.”

 

“How so?”

 

“I can count on one hand the number of ships the Resistance currently has access to, and two of those are X-Wings.  Plus,” he shook his head, “we don’t have the manpower or the technology to do,” he looked down at the datapad, “to do what this would take.”

 

Rennal shook his head.  “Look, all I need is one or two beings who can help me transfer the credits and then one or two more who can help with the physical assets.”

 

“But,” Poe started.

 

“Do you want this or not?”

 

“Of course, I kriffing want it!”  Poe sighed.  “It’s just a matter of keeping my soldiers safe.  In case you haven’t heard, we’re running on fumes, and I will not jeopardize the few beings that I have for this.  I just won’t.”

 

Rennal smiled.

 

“What,” Poe said, not even bothering to hide his annoyance. 

 

“You remind me of Alli.”

 

Poe leaned back, stretching his neck.  “How long you think we have before your family gets suspicious?”

 

“A few weeks,” Rennal said.  “I disappear from time to time, so it will take them a while to catch on.  Plus, I’ve already moved a lot of the tech and weapons, and even if they hear about me moving more, I’m hoping they’ll chalk it up to me being paranoid.”

 

Poe closed his eyes.  _This could be the thing that turns things around_.  He looked over at Rennal.  “And what’s in this for you?”

 

Rennal took a drink.  “Besides sticking it to the First Order?”

 

“Yeah.”

 

Rennal pinched his lips together, contemplating his drink.  “I don’t know.”  He looked over at Poe.  “Just something I need to do.”

 

Poe nodded and stood.  It was a gamble, but at the end of the day, he had to trust his gut.  He reached out his hand.  “Okay, Mr. Rennal.  We have a deal.”  Rennal heartily shook his hand.  “How do we get in touch with you?”

 

Rennal laughed.  “Oh, did I not make myself clear?”

 

Poe looked confused.

 

“I’m joining up.”

 

**# # # #**

 

“Excuse me, Colonel,” Kes said, coming into command.  “Could we have a word?”

 

Finn froze.  Kes looked pissed and Finn couldn’t for the life of him figure out why.  _Unless…Oh kriff.  He found out I was a Stormtrooper._   Finn sighed.  “Yeah, sure.”  He handed his datapad to Tansirch and nodded towards a side passage.  While so far, no one in the Resistance had made a big deal about the fact that Finn was ex-First Order, for weeks, he’d been waiting for the other shoe to drop.

 

 _I guess that happens today_ , Finn thought as he led Kes out of command.

 

As soon as the two were alone, Kes grabbed Finn’s arm and pulled him into a big hug.  “Karé and Iolo told me what you did for Poe, son.”  He squeezed tight.  “Thank you.”

 

Finn was still trying to process what was happening.  Eventually, he calmed down enough to say, “You’re welcome, sir.”

 

Kes pulled out of the hug.  “Drop the _sir_ , son.  It’s Kes.”

 

Finn nodded.  “Sure,” he said.  “Kes.”

 

“Now,” Kes said, wrapping an arm around Finn’s shoulders.  “If you aren’t too busy, I’d like to hear _your_ version of the story.”

 

Finn smiled as Kes pulled him towards the mess.  “Well, there was this mission on Jakku…”

 

**# # # #**

 

After arguing for the better part of an hour about why Rennal joining the Resistance was a bad idea, Poe caved.  Rennal packed his things and then offered to give Poe a ride back to his ship before the two of them set out for Jedha.

 

They were navigating the city’s back streets to get to Rennal’s ship when they turned a corner and came face-to-face with a squad of Stormtroopers.

 

Poe saw them a moment too late, and even in civvies, he must have had a recognizable face, because one of them yelled, “That’s Poe Dameron.”  Suddenly, blasterfire filled the air.

 

Rennal grabbed Poe’s arm and started running.  “Guess you’re a popular guy.”

 

“Yeah,” Poe said.  “You blow up their superweapon and take out a dreadnaught and they get all pissy.”  He jumped into an alley just a split second before a blast took out the wall behind him.

 

Rennal yelped, following him.  “Kriff!”

 

“You’re the one who wanted to join up,” Poe said.

 

“I figured I might get at least a week of training before the bad guys were shooting at me.”

 

“Welcome to the Resistance!”

 

Rennal shook his head.  _What in the kriff did I get myself into?_

“Fuck,” Poe said as another shot hit way too close for comfort.  He grabbed Amir’s arm and started running down another alley.

 

“You know where you’re going?”

 

“No kriffing clue,” Poe called out.

 

Amir then moved in front of Poe and jerked them both to the right.  “Then, I should lead, flyboy.”

 

“Flyboy?  Really?”  A shot blasted past their heads.  “Kriff,” Poe yelled, ducking.  “Fine!  Flyboy!”

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next week... Will Amir and Poe get away?
> 
> Plus, Lando, Leia, and Chewie get creative; Finn and Kes bond; Rey hears from an old friend; and Rose sends out a message.


	11. Waiting for the Fire

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We've crossed the half-way point in this story, so I feel like now is a good time to remind everyone to please be mindful of the tags moving forward.

* * *

 

 

Lando flicked a switch in the cockpit and Chewie gave him a look.

 

“Hey,” Lando said.  “I was the one piloting this rust-bucket before you and Han decided to steal her and,” he gestured around, “ruin everything.”

 

Chewie warbled out a response.

 

“Right, an idiot on Jakku,” Lando said.  He looked over his shoulder at Leia, who was obviously enjoying his banter with the Wookiee.  “So, your highness, who do you think should do the talking when we get there?”

 

Leia raised an eyebrow, considering.  Lando was just about the smoothest operator she’d ever met, but ever since he’d gone legitimate, there were certain smugglers who wanted nothing to do with him.  On the other hand, she had a reputation, even amongst the criminal element, but that didn’t always work in their favor.  “I don’t know,” she said.  “Play it by ear?”

 

Lando laughed.  “Sure.  Play it by ear.  Sounds like one of Han’s plans.”

 

Leia nodded, trying not to think about him.

 

“If you don’t mind me asking,” Lando said, without turning around.

 

“Ben,” she said quietly.  “Stabbed him with a lightsaber.”

 

Lando let out a long, low whistle.  “Those were the rumors, but I didn’t want to…”  He had vivid memories of Ben as a child and for the past several years, he’d had a hard time reconciling them with the monster that was Kylo Ren.  Lando looked over at Chewie.

 

Chewie made a sad noise.

 

Lando reached over and squeezed the Wookiee’s shoulder, grateful that he hadn’t had to watch his friend die.  _Kriff, Chewie, how are you handling all of this?_ He cleared his throat.  “Coming out of hyperspace on my mark…and mark.”  The ship rattled a bit as it decelerated, and it took all of them about two seconds to realize that they’d managed to appear in the middle of a mess.  First Order ships, pirates, and all sorts of civilian ships seemed to be in a massive free-for-all.  “Evasive maneuvers,” Lando yelled.  “Chewie, get down in that turret.”  The Wookiee was already moving.

 

Leia took Chewie’s spot, scanning the space in front of them.  “Holy hell,” she whispered.

 

“Seems like Ben is looking for us,” Lando said as he jerked the ship out of the way of oncoming debris.

 

Leia reached out, nudging the Force just a bit.  “No,” she said.  “This is just a coincidence.”  The ship shook as a shot rumbled past it.  “But all the same, how fast until you can get us out of this?”

 

“Don’t want to get us out of it,” Lando said.

 

“What?!?”

 

“Our contacts are in this sector, and we need to be here,” Lando said.  “Besides,” he said with a smile.  “I’m guessing this is the perfect place to start recruiting.”

 

Leia laughed, grabbing onto the console as the ship leaned heavily to the right.

 

Alarms started going off.  “We got three TIES on our rear, Chewie,” Lando yelled.  He turned to Leia, “The question is, where to hide until the Order has what they want and leave?”

 

Leia pulled up a map of the area, scanning it.  “How do you feel about an old debris field?”

 

“Perfect,” Lando said.  He then yelled, “Chewie, hold on!  We’re about to get creative.”

 

**# # # #**

 

“How are negotiations proceeding,” the voice asked over the comms.

 

Sabine growled, “About as well as could be expected.”  She leaned forward, closing her eyes and cradling her head in her hand, knowing that in all likelihood this transmission was being monitored.  “It seems that clan policy these days is _let’s pretend the Order doesn’t exist_.”

 

“Which will work until the Order shows up,” the voice on the other end of the line said.

 

“Exactly,” Sabine said.

 

“Well, we’re pulling for you.  And we got word from Zeb.  He and… _his new friends_ are doing well.  Just got an influx of… _goods_.”

 

Sabine laughed.  “Good,” she said, figuring their code wasn’t fooling anyone.  “And you,” she asked the voice on the other end of the line.  “Have you made your grand entrance yet?”

 

“Not yet,” the voice said.  “When the time is right.”

 

Sabine sighed and muttered, “Jedi.”

 

“What?”

 

“Nothing, dear.  Just tell Zeb’s _friends_ that I’ll keep plugging away at things here.”

 

“Will do.”

 

“May the Force be with you.”

 

The voice laughed.  “And you too.”

 

**# # # #**

 

Bode leaned over and whispered, “Any word on Piper?”

 

Jess shook her head, shoving whatever it was they were feeding the prisoners into her mouth.  She kept her head down.  “I think this is A’truna’s way of getting to me.”

 

Bode made a low noise of agreement.  A Stormtrooper walked by their table, and both focused on eating.  As soon as the trooper was far enough away, Bode said, “I started keeping a log of shift changes like you suggested.”

 

“And?”

 

Bode leaned in, “Is it possible that they’re making them work 12-hour shifts?”

 

“Anything’s possible,” Jess muttered.  She frowned, her fork frozen half-way to her mouth.  Her eyes flicked up.  She figured that in this mess alone, there had to be nearly three-hundred prisoners.  _But only six guards._

_Something’s not right._

 

She leaned in to Bode.  “I know this is a prison and all, but do you get the sense that they’re cutting corners?”

 

“That if it weren’t for beings like A’truna, they’d have no way to keep this many prisoners in line with as few troopers as they have?  Yeah,” Bode said.

 

Jess had never asked what he’d been or where he’d lived before coming to this place, but she appreciated his sharp mind.  “What’s the likelihood that the Order is having financial problems?”

 

Bode nearly snorted.

 

Jess shot him a nasty look.

 

“No,” he hissed, mindful of a guard two rows over.  “It’s just that, that would actually make some sense.  I can’t imagine how expensive Starkiller was, plus I’m pretty sure the Resistance didn’t go down without a fight.”

 

“They’re not down,” Jess said through clenched teeth.

 

“You know what I mean,” Bode whispered.  He leaned away from her as another guard walked by.

 

When that guard was gone, Jess said, “If that’s the case, then our plan might be a bit more workable.”

 

Bode nodded.  “I’ll let the twins know.”

 

Jess tensed.  “We still need to wait to see what happened to Piper.”

 

Bode let out a sigh.

 

Jess knew he thought Piper was dead, but she wasn’t giving up hope.

 

_Not yet._

 

**# # # #**

 

They were both panting, leaning against a wall in the port area.

 

“I think we lost ‘em,” Poe said, looking right and left.

 

Rennal nodded, leaning forward and trying to catch his breath.   “I am so out of shape.”

 

Poe laughed, slapping the other man on the back.  “You won’t be in a few weeks, buddy.”

 

Rennal looked up at him.  “You seriously do that all the time?”

 

“Well, I was usually in an X-Wing getting shot at, but yeah, I’ve done my fair share of running from Stormtroopers.”

 

Rennal shook his head.  “I’m going to have to start jogging or something.”

 

Poe laughed.  Rennal might be an ass, but he was starting to warm to him.  “Oh, don’t worry.  We’ll get you into shape.”  He looked around.  Everything seemed quiet.  “Come on.  Let’s find your ship, so you can take me to mine and we can get off this rock.”

 

“Sure,” Rennal said, still a little breathless.  “Let’s go sit down.”

 

**# # # #**

           

“Poe!”

 

Finn sat up in his bunk, sweat pouring down his face.  He sucked in a huge breath, and then another.

 

He closed his eyes, trying to steady his breathing.

 

_Poe is alive._

_He survived._

_We made it out of the crash._

_Poe is fine._

 

And then he remembered the mission.

 

_I hope._

 

Finn got up and dressed, knowing from past experience that he wasn’t going to get any more sleep.  He made his way to the mess, grabbed a drink, and sat at an empty table.  He looked around.  Koo was in a corner, leaning on her hand, dozing.  No one else was around.

 

He wanted to scream.  He wanted to run to command and demand they put him in touch with Poe, just so he could hear Dameron’s voice.  He wanted…

 

_I want to stop being scared all the time and worried and…_

 

Finn closed his eyes and took a shaky breath.  He sipped his drink.

 

_Calm the fuck down._

_He’s fine._

 

He started practicing the breathing meditation Rey had taught him. 

 

He’d been doing it for a few minutes when he heard a noise.  He opened his eyes to see Kes fixing himself a drink.

 

Kes walked over.  “Never slept more than three or four hours with the Pathfinders.”  He shrugged.  “And never got over the habit.”

 

Finn nodded to the chair across from him.

 

Kes sat down, slowly sipping his drink.

 

Finn looked at his mug, spinning it slowly in his hands.  “You ever feel like you’re faking it?”

 

“Every damn day I was in the Rebellion,” Kes said.  “None of us knew what we were doing.”

 

Finn smiled and looked up.  “Poe does.”

 

Kes laughed.  “Son, I raised him.  Trust me, he’s faking it as much as the rest of us.”

 

Finn shook his head.  “I miss him,” he said.  He got a faraway look in his eyes.

 

 _So that’s how it is_.  Kes smiled.  “Yeah, I hear that.”  He took another drink.  “Haven’t been able to talk to him much in the last year or so.  He came back to Yavin after Jakku just long enough to change ships.  Didn’t tell me about you or the _Finalizer_ ,” Kes sighed, trying not to think about what the Order had done to his son.  “Probably didn’t want me to worry.”  Kes shook his head.  “Nerfherder.”  Finn chuckled.  Kes said, “No, he hugged me, promised to comm soon, and took off.”  He put his mug down.  “It’s always go-go-go with that one.  Just like his mama.”

 

“What was she like?”

 

“Shara?”  Kes stared at his drink.  “There aren’t enough words to describe her.  She was…the most amazing being I ever met.  Transcendent.  Made everything just a bit easier.”  He smiled at Finn.  “Meeting her was the best damn thing that ever happened in my life.  Well, before we had Poe.”  Finn noticed that Kes’s eyes did that same crinkle thing that Poe’s did.  “I’m so kriffing proud of him,” Kes said.  “Everything he’s done.  Who he is.”  He got a faraway look in his eyes.  “His mama…she…she’d be damn proud of him too.”

 

Finn felt a longing in his chest he’d never felt before.  He suddenly wanted to know his parents, to talk to them, to tell them all the things he’d done since breaking out of the Order.  He wanted someone to talk about him the way Kes was talking about Poe.

 

Kes studied the young man sitting across from him.  “I’m proud of you too,” he said.

 

Finn blinked.

 

Kes smiled.  “Knew a few defectors in my day and to a one, they were people with big hearts.  The bravest soldiers I ever knew.  Had to be.  That’s the only way it works, isn’t it?”

 

“Mostly, I was just scared.”

 

Kes chuckled, finishing off his drink.  “Well, that’s it, right?  Bravery is doing it, even when you’re terrified.  Because it’s the right thing to do.”

 

Finn sat there, turning his mug in his hands.  “Kes,” he said.  “What if there are others?”

 

“Others?”

 

“I can’t be the only Stormtrooper who ever had second thoughts.”

 

“Don’t they lock that shit down pretty tight?”

 

“Yeah,” Finn said, “but I’ve been thinking that if we were able to get to a training facility, get to some young troopers before they’ve been out in the field and talk to them…”

 

“That you might be able to turn them?”

 

Finn nodded.  “I just wonder how many of them are sitting in their barracks, terrified, thinking there’s no way out.”

 

Kes hummed, thinking it over.  “I think you and I should go talk to Zeb.  He knows a thing or two about defectors...  Maybe draw up some plans?”

 

Finn smiled.  “Yeah?”

 

“Yeah.  I think it’s a good idea.”

 

**# # # #**

 

Rey watched the children as they slept.  All three were still shy, but they seemed to know they could trust her.  She frowned as stars streaked past the ship.  _What exactly is my plan here?_

 

 _Gather Force-sensitives and…and their friends that I can’t leave behind.  And then what?_   Fear spiked in her.  _What am I supposed to do with a bunch of children?_

 

_I don’t know anything about children._

 

She got up from the cockpit and walked to the hold, going through the motions of her exercises.  She felt a ripple in the Force, and for a moment, she froze, expecting the worst.  Then, she turned and saw something truly baffling.

 

“Luke,” she whispered.

 

Skywalker’s blue-glowing form stood before her.  “Hello, Rey.”

 

Rey instinctively took a step back.  “But…but you’re…”

 

“Dead,” Luke said, matter-of-factly.  He smiled.  “Nothing ever really dies in the Force.”

 

“So, you’re…you’re,” Rey closed her eyes and took a deep breath.  _You can handle this._

“I’m a ghost,” Luke said.  “For lack of a better term.”

 

“And this is a common thing?”

 

Luke smiled.  “Yes.  Force-wielders can come back.  Typically, only those they had bonds with or who are especially strong in the Force can see them, though.”

 

Rey nodded.  “Why are you here?”

 

“You seemed troubled,” Luke said.  He moved towards the main part of the craft, nodding towards the children.

 

“One of them is like me, but, but… I couldn’t leave the other two.”

 

Luke smiled at her.  “No.  You did the right thing.”  He moved up towards the cockpit.  “And now?”

 

“Felucia,” Rey said.  “There’s someone there.”

 

“Perhaps more than one someone,” Luke said.

 

Rey raised an eyebrow.  “Is that part of it too?  You’re going to be all mysterious?”

 

Luke laughed.  “Trust me.  I’m so much more forthcoming than any of my teachers ever were.”

 

Rey sat in the pilot’s seat.  “I get the feeling that the Jedi weren’t a straightforward bunch.”

 

“No,” Luke said, seeming to sit down beside her.

 

She looked back at the children.  “I don’t know how to take care of them.”

 

“You were a child once.”

 

Rey’s forehead bunched a bit.  “Was I?”

 

Luke said, “Treat them with respect and love and follow your instincts.”

 

Rey smiled, looking over at him.  “I like that.”

 

“And you won’t be alone for very long,” Luke said.  “There are others.  They’ve been away for a long time, but they’re back now, and…”  He smiled.  “You’ll be able to build a family of beings, teach each other, learn from each other.”  Luke leaned forward.  “And I’ll never really be gone.  Not completely.”

 

Rey sat in silence for several minutes after Luke faded away.  Then, she let out a long breath, feeling much better than she had a few hours earlier.

 

**# # # #**

 

The guards drug Piper into the cell and dumped her on the floor.  As soon as Jess couldn’t hear their boots clanking against the walkway anymore, she jumped from the slab that served as her bed and crouched over her friend.

 

Piper opened one eye—the other was swollen too badly—and smiled at Jess.  Jess had to fight the urge to be sick.  They’d worked the poor girl over until there was barely anything left.

 

“I didn’t break,” Piper croaked out.

 

Jess tried to smile, figuring it came out as a grimace.  She put a hand on Piper’s shoulder, trying not to look at the marks on the girl’s body or the blood.  “Good,” Jess said in as soothing a tone as she could muster.  “You did good,” she murmured.  She tried to decide if it would be worth it to try to get Piper up off the floor and finally decided against it.  Instead, she moved until she was sitting at Piper’s head, slowly working until Piper’s head was on her leg.  Jess moved her hand through Piper’s hair, trying to work out the tangles.  She started singing a song her mother had sung when she was a child, and as she sang, she fought back against her tears.

 

“Nice,” Piper murmured.

 

“Sleep,” Jess said.

 

Piper moved a hand up to Jess’ arm.  “I didn’t tell them anything.”

 

Jess leaned forward, whispering, “I know.  You did great.”

 

Piper smiled, and it was a gruesome sight.  Jess closed her eyes and put a supportive hand on Piper’s head.  “Sleep, okay?  We’ll talk more in the morning.”

 

“Ummmm-hmmmmm,” Piper hummed.

 

Jess sat their humming and rocking Piper the rest of the night.

 

When the guards came to fetch them for their work detail the next morning, Piper was dead, and Jess had a hard glint in her eyes.

 

_Going to make them all burn._

 

 


	12. Ember to Flame

 

 

Poe set the X-Wing down perfectly and took a moment to close his eyes and savor the feeling.  _Don’t know when I’ll get to do this again_ , he thought to himself.  He popped the hatch and didn’t even wait for a ladder, hopping off and only groaning slightly as he landed.  He waved at Rennal’s ship—a Naboo star skiff, of all things—as Kaydel came out to greet him.

 

“I take it the Resistance is still up and running, Colonel,” Poe said.

 

“Yes,” Kaydel said.  “I take it the meeting with Rennal went well.”

 

“You could say that,” Poe said with a smile, nodding back towards Rennal’s ship.

 

Kaydel had a smile of her own.

 

“What,” Poe asked.

 

She nodded towards the entrance of the base where a figure was emerging into the light.  It took Poe a split second before he recognized him.  “Dad,” Poe yelled as he started running.  He crashed into his old man, laughing like a madman.

 

Kes was chuckling, shaking his head, “Yeah, kiddo.”  He put his hand on the back of Poe’s head, pulling his son closer and whispering, “You scared the ever-loving shit out of me.”  He buried his head in his son’s shoulder.  “Don’t do that again.”

 

“No, sir,” Poe said, tears leaking from his eyes.  “Fuck,” he whispered.  He stepped back, but kept his hands on his dad’s arms, refusing to sever contact.  “How long have you been back?”

 

“Got here just after you left,” Kes said.  He raised an eyebrow.  “General.”  He smiled.

 

Poe ducked his head, blushing. 

 

Kes ruffled his son’s hair before he jerked his head to the side.  “Found those two on Crait.”

 

Poe looked over and his eyes grew even wider.  “Oh no,” he breathed out, already running.  “Karé?  Iolo?”  He laughed as he ran to the two of them, trying to get one in each arm.

 

Karé pulled him in close, closing her eyes and whispering, “Good to see you, Poe.”

 

“You have no idea, Kun.”

 

Poe let her go and grabbed Iolo into a proper hug.  Iolo immediately started trying to get out of it.  “Yeah, yeah, yeah.  We’re all happy.”

 

“Shut up, Lo,” Poe said.  He leaned in.  “Glad to see you.”

 

“Glad to see you too,” Iolo whispered before pushing away.  He quickly wiped his eyes.  “But seriously, what moof-milker went and made you a general?”

 

Poe shook his head and laughed.  “That would’ve been Leia.”

 

“Oh, it’s _Leia_ now,” Karé asked.

 

“Yeah,” Poe said, ducking his head, overcome with joy—an emotion that had been seriously lacking in his life for the past few months.

 

Kes came over, putting a hand on Poe’s back.  “What say we continue this reunion in the mess?”

 

“That sounds amazing, Dad,” Poe said.  He looked around, spotting Kaydel, who had already taken Rennal’s arm and was leading him towards the base.  “Just let me go check in first.”

 

“Sure, son.”  Kes watched his son jog over towards Kaydel, and he couldn’t help but think about Shara.  There was so much of her in Poe.  He smiled _.  A kriffing general, honey.  Leading the whole damn Resistance_.  He shook his head. 

 

Karé took his arm and said, “Let’s go get something to eat.”

 

**# # # #**

 

Karé, Iolo, and Kes had insisted Finn join them, and the group were laughing about stories of young Poe when the man himself walked into the mess.  He had his arm around the shoulder of a taller man, who he quickly introduced as Amir Rennal.

 

Finn knew he had no reason to hate Rennal, but he almost instantly did.  It didn’t help that he and Poe seemed to have this banter-thing going on.

 

“So,” Poe said, after he’d gotten himself and Rennal some drinks.  “I’m happy to report that the Resistance is about to be a lot better funded and a lot better equipped.”  He turned to Finn.  “Rose was practically speechless when I showed her the inventory.”

 

“I don’t think she likes me much,” Rennal said.

 

Poe laughed.  “She takes a while.”  He nodded at Finn.  “She tazed him the first time they met.”

 

Rennal raised an eyebrow at Finn.  “Really?”

 

“Really,” Finn said.  _Not one of my fondest memories_.

 

Rennal reached his hand out.  “Amir Rennal.”

 

Finn gave his hand a quick shake.  “Finn.”

 

“The ex-Stormtrooper?”

 

Kes put an arm around Finn.  “You’ve heard of our boy here?”

 

Rennal laughed.  “Everyone in the galaxy has.  He’s got a bigger bounty on his head than either Organa or Poe.”

 

Karé whistled.  “You must’ve pissed off the wrong people, Finn.”

 

Poe smiled at Finn.  “He was just doing the right thing.”

 

For a moment, it was just Poe and Finn, and for a moment, Finn smiled back, lost in Poe’s eyes.  Then, he remembered they had an audience.  “They want to set an example.  Prove to the other troopers that it isn’t worth it to defect.”

 

Kes nodded.  “I have a feeling a lot of you are going to have to be extra careful.”

 

“There’s a bounty on your head too, sir,” Rennal said.

 

Kes whistled.  “Wow.”

 

Iolo slapped his back.  “Welcome to the club!”

 

The group laughed.

 

Rennal bumped his shoulder into Poe’s.  “So, besides getting a bounty on my head, what can I expect from the Resistance?”

 

Poe chuckled and something about it hit Finn right in the gut.  He abruptly stood.  “I should get back to command.”

 

“Stay,” Poe said.

 

“No,” Finn said, already walking away.  “I should…I have work to do.”

 

No one at the table missed Poe’s hurt look as Finn walked away.

 

**# # # #**

 

Finn nearly ran into Rose as he marched into command.  “Hey,” she said, jumping out of his way.

 

“Sorry,” he said.  And then he realized he’d practically run all the way from the mess.  He leaned against a console.  “Sorry.”

 

“What’s wrong?”

 

“Nothing,” Finn said, shaking his head.  “Just tired.”

 

Rose frowned.  Her feelings for Finn were complicated, but the guy was clearly hurting.  She decided to try another tack.  “You meet Amir Rennal yet?”

 

“Yeah,” he said, letting the disdain drip from his voice.

 

“Exactly,” Rose said, crossing her arms and leaning up next to Finn.

 

“But he has money,” Finn said.

 

“Yeah,” Rose said.  “And so much equipment,” she said, still in a bit of shock.

 

“But, yeah, he’s a slimeball,” Finn said.

 

Rose laughed, leaning into her friend.  “He is.”

 

_And Poe likes him_.  Finn frowned.

 

Rose saw it, and she could guess what was going on in his mind.  “Want to help me with this?  We’re trying to figure out the best way to get all of the weapons he’s got stashed before his family shuts us down.”

 

**# # # #**

 

“General,” Kaydel’s voice came over the comms.  “I think we’re ready to start transferring those credits.”

 

Poe nodded to Rennal.  “We’ll be right there.”  He turned to his Dad, Karé, and Iolo.  “Sorry.  Duty calls.”  He stood.

 

“No worries, son,” Kes said.  He grabbed Poe’s arm.  “But we’re talking later.”

 

“Yes, sir,” Poe said, before giving his father a quick kiss on the top of the head and then moving away.

 

When they were out of the mess, Rennal said, “So the kid?”

 

“Kid,” Poe asked.

 

“Finn,” Amir said. 

 

“He’s not a kid.”

 

Amir laughed.  “Yeah, sure…  So, this Finn kid?  What’s the deal?”

 

“Deal?”

 

“You sleeping with him or what?”

 

Poe stumbled and then shot a wide-eyed glance at Amir, who grabbed his arm to steady him.  “What?  Kriff, no!”

 

“Why not?”

 

“Why not?  Why…”  Poe’s mouth hung open.  “What in the kriff do you mean _why not_?”

 

“I think that’s a pretty straightforward question, Dameron.”

 

Poe shook his head, shock still clear on his face.

 

Amir said, “I mean, you like him, don’t you?”

 

Poe stumbled again.  “Seriously!  I don’t know what—”

 

“You can pretend all you want, Dameron.  Ain’t gonna change the fact that you’re gone on that kid.”

 

“He’s not a kid,” Poe bit back.

 

Amir laughed.  “Yeah.  Whatever.”

 

**# # # #**

 

The message was being broadcast all over the galaxy: “Hello, this is Commander Rose Tico of the Resistance.  We’re here today to tell you that the First Order is lying to you.  We aren’t dead.  We are rebuilding.  We are fighting back.  And we urge all beings in all sectors of the galaxy to join us.  Take up your weapons, whatever they may be, and fight back.  The Order wants to kill us or make us into slaves, and we say that is unacceptable.”  She took a deep breath.  “We’re not going to rest until the Order is defeated.  That is our promise to you.”  She paused before adding, “Remember, the Resistance is alive.  We are here for you.  Don’t give up hope.”

 

Snap looked up and smiled at the group gathered in the small room behind his shop.  There were a dozen of them now; they were slowly building tech and recruiting new members.  Soon, they’d be ready to reach out to the Resistance and form a proper cell.  “See, Nyss, I told you they were rebuilding.”

 

Nyss laughed, “Yes, you did, boss.”

 

**# # # #**

 

Rey smiled as she heard the broadcast.  The children gathered around the ship’s comm as it played again.  “Those are the beings that we’re going to help.  They’re the ones trying to put an end to the First Order.”  The children smiled.

 

**# # # #**

 

Lando raised an eyebrow at Leia.  She couldn’t help the self-satisfied smirk on her face.  “I guess that means we better get our butts in gear,” Lando said, “and find your people some new allies.”

 

“ _Our_ people, Lando,” Leia corrected.

 

He smiled.  “You’re absolutely right, highness.  _Our_ people.”

 

**# # # #**

 

The next day, Finn stood at one end of the main table in command.  Zeb and Kes flanked him.  Poe, Kaydel, Rose, and Koo stood at the other end.

 

“I’m proposing a small mission.  Me and one other being.  We go and infiltrate one of the Stormtrooper training facilities and I lead a mutiny of the troopers,” Finn said.  “I figure—”

 

“No,” Poe said, crossing his arms.

 

“You gonna hear the whole plan first,” Kes asked.

 

“No,” Poe said.  “We don’t have the manpower to risk one of our top commanders on a mission like this.”

 

“Maybe if we heard the whole plan,” Rose started.

 

Poe worked hard to keep his voice even.  “I said _no_.”

 

Finn walked over and grabbed Poe’s arm, turning to the rest of the command team.  “Will you excuse us for a moment?”  He then pulled Poe out to one of the passageways and said in a low voice, “We’ve already had this argument, Poe.”

 

“Yeah, well, we’re having it again,” Poe hissed.

 

“So, it’s okay for you to go out and meet a mysterious benefactor but not okay for me to—”

 

“To go to a kriffing First Order training facility and get yourself killed?  Those two things are NOT the same, and you know it, Finn!”

 

“Well, seeing as I’m the only ex-Stormtrooper you have, it just makes sense that—”

 

“No,” Poe said.

 

“Poe,” Finn started.

 

“No,” Poe said, louder.  “I’m the fucking General and I say _no_.”

 

“And with all due respect, _General,_ ” Finn said, “I think you need to get your head out of your ass and—”

 

Someone cleared their throat at the end of the hall.

 

Both men turned to see Kes standing there.  “General.  Colonel.”

 

“Kes,” Finn said.

 

“Dad?”

 

Kes walked over.  “Why don’t the two of you come back and we’ll discuss this.”

 

“There’s no discussion,” Poe said.  “Head of the Resistance,” he said, pointing to himself.  He started back towards command.

 

“Huge jackass,” Finn called after him.  Kes raised an eyebrow.  “Well, he’s being a colossal kriffing moof-milker, sir.”

 

“Oh, I’m well aware of that,” Kes said.  He caught Finn’s eyes.  “And do you know why?”

 

“Because he doesn’t think I can do it.”

 

Kes gave Finn a sad smile and put a hand on his shoulder.  “You’re an idiot, son.”  He grabbed Finn’s arm and pulled him back towards command.  “Come on.  Zeb and I are going to help you make your case.”

 

Kes walked in and barked, “Poe Cassian Bey Dameron.”  All of command went silent.

 

Poe turned, his face blazed red and he simultaneously felt nine years old and so kriffing pissed at someone who was technically his subordinate that his brain short-circuited.  He sucked in a quick breath as it came back online.  “I’d like to remind you, _Sergeant_ Dameron, that I’m the kriffing head of this organization.”

 

“Yes, you are,” Kes said.  “And feel free to write me up or throw me in the brig when we’re finished here, but I think you need to hear this young man’s plan out.”

 

“So do I,” Zeb said.

 

“So do I,” Rose added.

 

Amir walked up to the table and shot Poe a knowing look.  Poe crossed his arms to keep from punching something…or someone.  “Fine,” he spat out.  “But then,” he looked at his father.  “You and I are having a long talk.”

 

“Yes, sir,” Kes said.

 

**# # # #**

 

When Finn finished explaining the plan, Poe stood there for a beat.  He turned to Kaydel.  “I’ll be on my comms if you need me for the next hour.”  He looked back up at the group.  “I’ll let you know my decision then.  Dismissed.”  Kes started to step forward.  “Later,” Poe said, hating how he was having to talk to his dad.

 

Finn looked from Kes to Zeb.

 

“I guess it means something that he’s willing to consider it,” Zeb said.

 

“He’ll come around,” Kes said, patting Finn’s back.

 

“You shouldn’t have put yourself in the middle,” Finn said.

 

Kes shook his head.  “I can handle it.”

 

“But still…”

 

“Zeb, let’s buy this man a drink,” Kes said, already shoving Finn towards the mess.

 

“Sounds good,” Zeb laughed.

 

Amir waited until they were gone and then pushed himself off a nearby wall and walked to Poe’s quarters.

 

**# # # #**

 

Amir stood frowning in front of Poe’s quarters.  He wasn’t there.

 

Kaydel came up behind him and said, “He’ll either be in the gym or out on the east side of base.  That’s where he goes when…”

 

Amir nodded, already moving.  Kaydel quickly fell in next to him.

 

They found Poe twenty minutes later, going through a series of martial arts moves in an unused room on the east side of the base.  “We thought we might find you here,” Kaydel said.

 

“Not in the mood to talk right now.”

 

“I don’t really care,” Amir said.

 

Poe stopped, picking up a towel and wiping his forehead.  “What do you want?”

 

“His plan is solid,” Amir said.

 

“I’m kriffing aware that his plan is solid.”

 

Kaydel shot him a confused look.  “But you’re still going to say no?”

 

“I don’t know,” Poe said, throwing the towel down and starting to move again.

 

Amir stepped into the room.  “You’re really going to let your crush on this guy determine—”

 

Poe was in his face in a flash.  “I am so sick of beings accusing me of being a bad leader because I think with my fucking heart!”  Amir took a step back, nearly knocking Kaydel over.  “You think I don’t know it’s a decent plan?  I do!”  Poe started pacing back into the room.  “But I also know that the chances are real damn good that even if he were to recruit some soldiers, there’d be a lot of casualties and more than likely, he is not making it back.”  Poe stopped, his back to them, shaking his head.  He took a deep breath and turnd.  “And yeah, so fine—even if I did have a crush on him—you know what?”  Poe pointed to himself, his voice rising.  “I’m also the person who has to weigh the fact that he’s one of the most symbolically important beings we have in the Resistance.  The other two are off flying who knows where, and they may not come back!”  He stalked closer to Kaydel and Amir.  “Finn dies and the Order gets to tell everyone that that’s the fate of anyone who steps out of line.”

 

Amir crossed his arms.  “So you actually are thinking about this?”

 

“Fucking hell,” Poe screamed.  “Of course, I am!  That is my kriffing job!”  He pulled at his hair and started pacing again. 

 

“I didn’t realize,” Amir said.

 

“No, you didn’t,” Poe said, deflating just a bit.  He found a wall and leaned into it, scrubbing his hands over his face.  “Is there anyone on this kriffing base who thinks I can do this job?”

 

Kaydel said, “Me.”

 

Poe looked up at her and was caught by the sincerity in her eyes.

 

“Me too,” Amir said.

 

Poe sighed.  “Thanks,” he said, pushing off the wall and reaching for his towel.  “Such a kriffing mess,” he said, pushing past them and walking back towards his quarters.

 

Amir called out, “At the end of the day, you’re going to have to ask yourself if you trust Finn enough to gamble with his life.”

 

Poe stopped.  He turned to say something to them, but Kaydel and Amir were already walking the other way.

 

“Fuck,” Poe said.  He knew what he had to do.

 

**# # # #**

 

The Order seemed to have finally left the quadrant, and the fighting was over, but Lando and Leia were both playing it very cautious.  Chewie, on the other hand, was growing impatient, so Lando reached out to an old friend named Cal.  It had taken the smoothest of smooth talking from Lando to get Cal to agree to meet, but he finally did, and now the four of them were sitting around a table on Cal’s ship with his crew looking on.

 

Leia didn’t like it, but given the way that Cal’s crew was eyeing Chewie, she figured they had a 50-50 shot if things went south.  _Everyone’s afraid of Wookiees_ , she could hear Han saying.  _It’s cause they’ve never met one in real life.  Ewoks!  That’s what everyone should be afraid of.  They’ll eat you alive._ She couldn’t help but smile at the memory.

 

She looked across the table at Lando, who was doing his hardest to hit Cal with a tough sell.

 

“I just don’t see why me and mine should risk our necks,” Cal started.

 

“So that mess that we jumped into the other day, stuff like that is fine?”

 

“That’s just the Order making sure everyone knows who the new boss is.  Once they have things locked down, they’ll let everyone get back to business.”

 

Leia snorted.  Lando shot her a look, but she couldn’t help herself.  “I think you’re confusing the Order with the Empire.  That may have been how the Emperor ran things, but it won’t be how Hux and Ren do.”

 

“And how would you know that, Princess?”

 

Leia bristled at the title and decided on the direct approach.  “Because I raised one of them and spent the last seven years studying the other one.  Brendol Hux was a sadistic fanatic and as far as I can tell, the only decent thing his son has ever done is kill him.  They want order.  They want to control everything.  And on top of that, Ren has a special grudge where smugglers are concerned.  That means no more smuggling, probably no more gangs as well.”

 

Cal chuckled.  “I’d like to see them try to take out the gangs.”

 

Lando said, “Seeing as how they’ve been developing hyperspace weapons and tracking systems, I think you just might.”

 

“Starkiller is destroyed.”

 

“Yeah, and we thought the same thing after the Death Star,” Leia said.

 

Cal’s smile disappeared.  “But you’re asking us to put ourselves directly in their crosshairs.”

 

One of his crew stepped forward.  “Seems to me the only time your kind come calling is when you want new soldiers to send to the slaughter.”

 

There were several _yeahs_ voiced with that.

 

Leia sighed and stood as she said, “Basically, there are three kinds of beings in the galaxy: those who would have everyone else bend to their will; those who push back, and those who don’t want to get involved.  But here’s the thing,” she said, “with the Order, eventually, you’re going to have to get involved.  Because I guarantee, they’re going to come for you.  And maybe that’s the day you decide to start pushing back or maybe that’s the day you die.  I don’t know.  But I will say this.  Every single being who died during the battles of D’Qar and Crait was a hero.  They were trying to stop a genocidal force that wants to crush the galaxy under its heel.  And every single one of them died pushing back.  What you have to decide now is if you’re willing to step up and risk your life like that or if you’re going to hide and wait.”  She looked over at Lando.  “Let’s go.”

  
Lando nodded and rose, Chewie right behind him.  “If you change your mind, Cal, you know how to reach me.”

 

**# # # #**

 

Amir and Kaydel found Kes, Zeb, and Finn in the mess.  They had an animated talk at the edge of the room before Kaydel shot the group a strange look and then took off towards command.  “Wonder what that’s about,” Zeb murmured.

 

Amir walked up to them.  “Hello,” he said.  “Do you mind,” he nodded at an empty chair.

 

“Sure,” Kes said, not missing the way Finn tensed around the other man. 

 

“I just wanted to say, for what it’s worth, I think you have a good plan.”

 

“Thanks,” Finn said, trying to sound polite.

 

“But I think that all of you need to back off the General just a bit.”  Kes’s eyes went wide.  Amir continued, “He’s taking over command from _Leia fucking Organa_ , and from what I can tell, she had been planning on handing things over to him for a while—but then there was that mess with the Order and…and, I guess things got sped up.”  Amir looked around the table.  “It can’t be easy to go from being everyone’s friend—or their son—to being the person in charge.  And yeah, from what I can tell, the guy wears his emotions on his sleeve, but maybe that’s not such a bad thing?”  He looked around at them.  “Plus, did any of you stop to consider what happens if Finn dies on this mission?  Maker knows I didn’t, but Poe did.”  Amir frowned as he turned to Finn.  “You’re his friend, but…but if you die, the Order scores a victory that the Resistance might not recover from.”  Finn snorted.  Amir shook his head and rose.  “Look, all I’m saying is, he actually had valid reasons for saying no, and I think it took a lot of class to reconsider.  He’s got the worst fucking job in the galaxy, so…I don’t know?  Maybe cut the guy some slack?”  He shrugged.  “That’s all.”

 

He started to walk away, when he turned and added, “Just try to remember that from what little I’ve seen, he actually is really good at his job, okay?”

 

The three men sat there in silence for several beats.

 

Finn felt as if he’d been plunged into ice water.  _Fucking hell._ He wanted to scream.  _And, of course, it had to be Amir_ , he thought to himself.  He closed his eyes. 

 

“You okay, kid,” Zeb asked.

 

Finn shook his head.  “No.”

 

Kes pushed away from the table.

 

“Where are you going,” Zeb asked.

 

“I owe the General an apology,” he said.

 

**# # # #**

 

Back on the ship, Lando stared at Leia as Chewie started the pre-flight sequence.  “That was your plan?”

 

Leia smiled.  “Give it time,” she said.  “I’m good at reading a room.”

 

“So am I,” Lando said.

 

“Well, then, you know that some of them were never going to agree to join us, but some of them—”

 

The comm in the Falcon dinged.

 

Lando gave Leia a strange look before answering.  “Yes?”

 

Cal said, “We’ve got some beings here who want to sign up.  Figure it might be worth it to come back on over and talk things out.”

 

“Sure thing, Cal,” Lando said.  He flipped off the comm, shaking his head.  “You never cease to amaze me, your highness.”

 

**# # # #**

 

Poe looked up as his father entered command.  He nodded to a far corner and Kes nodded back.  Poe continued talking to Karé and Iolo for a few minutes.  Then, he walked over to his father.  He opened his mouth, but Kes beat him to it.

 

“I’m sorry, General.  I was out of line earlier.”

 

Poe nodded.  One part of him wanted to reach out and hug his dad.  Another part needed to make sure this wouldn’t happen again.  “When we’re in command,” Poe started.

 

“You aren’t my son.  You’re my CO.  I get it.”

 

Poe nodded.  “Good.  Now,” he said, gesturing towards the main table.  “If I were to give the go-ahead to Finn’s plan—”

 

Kes smiled.

 

“I said _if_ ,” Poe said.

 

“If,” Kes repeated.

 

“Then, how would you feel about taking over control of ground forces with Tansirch?  Basically, you two would work as a team and report directly to me.”

 

“Sounds good,” Kes said.  “I was thinking we might ask Zeb to—”

 

“I’ve got plans for Zeb,” Poe said.

 

Kes nodded.  “Fair enough.”

 

“Thanks,” Poe said.  He pointed over at Tansirch.  “You two should probably start talking logistics.”

 

Poe walked out and made his way to the mess.

 

**# # # #**

 

Finn froze and Zeb looked over to see Poe walking in.

 

“Poe,” Finn started.

 

Poe stopped next to them, raising his hand.  “I’ve reconsidered your plan, Colonel, and I’m very reluctantly going to give it the go-ahead.”  Zeb smiled.  Finn remained motionless.  “I’ve talked to Karé and Iolo.  I’m putting them in charge of the pilots.  They have more experience than C’ai.  I’m putting my father and Tansirch in change of the ground troops.  With you gone, it just seemed time to go ahead and separate out the two chains of command.  I’ll want you to spend the next few days meeting with my command team as well as Dad and Tansirch on the security measures we should be taking in your absence.”

 

“What about me,” Zeb asked.

 

“I want you to go with him.  I figure you and my father have the most experience breaking into Imperial instillations, and the Order’s facilities don’t look to be that different.  Plus, to be frank, you’re in better shape than my father.”

 

Zeb chuckled.  “I won’t tell him you said that.”

 

“Thanks,” Poe said, with a hint of a smile.  It almost immediately fell again as he directed his attention to Finn.  He took a deep breath.  “You have a timeline for leaving?”

 

“A week?”  Finn shrugged.  “It will depend a lot what sort of ship is available to us, what weapons we can get.”

 

Poe nodded.  “You’ll need to schedule a meeting with Amir and Kaydel as soon as possible then.”  For a moment, it looked like he wanted to say more, but he didn’t.  “Good luck, Finn,” he said, before turning and walking back toward command.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just wanted to say a quick thank you to everyone who has been commenting on the chapters. This is a massive fic and I'm updating quickly. I'm really touched by those of you who are showing up regularly and commenting. It means a lot. Thanks!


	13. Scars

 

 

“You free?”  Kes looked over at his son with a hopeful smile. 

 

Poe had a million little things to do, and over the past few days, things had been a bit awkward with his father, but there was something in the old man’s eyes.  Poe turned to Kaydel.  “Can you cover for me for an hour or so?”

 

“Of course,” she said.

 

Poe turned to his father.  “Lead the way.”

 

Kes led Poe out to a thin ledge on the far side of the base.  He crawled out onto it and then motioned for Poe to follow.

 

“You really do find the strangest places,” Poe said.

 

“Pathfinder,” Kes said.  “We survey and adapt.”

 

“You just like to show off,” Poe said.

 

Kes chuckled.  “That too.”

 

As Poe settled in next to him, he reached over, squeezing his son’s arm.  “I haven’t told you yet how proud I am of you.”

 

“You’ve told me about a million times, Dad.”  Poe turned to his father.  “But…thanks.”

 

Kes nodded, then turned to look out towards New Jedha City.  “Always amazed me the ways beings will come back from the brink of destruction.”  His voice got soft.  “Empire blows the city up and beings rebuild.  Empire destroys Alderaan and some of ‘em come here and set up.”  He shook his head.  “Life always finds a way.”

 

Poe stared out into the dusk.  “Gives you hope.”

 

“Yep.”

 

They sat in silence for several minutes before Kes said, “You want to tell me about Finn?”

 

Poe smiled.  “I guess I didn’t get much of a chance after Jakku, did I?”  He leaned back against the rock and shook his head.  “Honestly, I thought I was going to die.  Ren had what he wanted and this Stormtrooper comes into my cell and—”

 

“I know about that,” Kes said.  “Finn told me the story.”

 

Poe looked confused.

 

“Son,” Kes said, “tell me about Finn.”

 

It took another second, but then Poe caught on.  He pulled his legs up to his chest.  “Am I that obvious?”

 

“I’m your papa,” Kes said, bumping his shoulder into Poe’s.  “I’d like to think that makes me a bit more perceptive than most.”

 

“I guess.”  He rocked back a bit.  “What do you want to know?”

 

“Any reason you haven’t told him?”

 

Poe gestured around.  “There’s a war on?”

 

Kes shook his head with a chuckle.  “If that were a good excuse, you’d have never been born.  Try again.”

 

Poe stared out towards New Jedha City.  “He came back from Starkiller with a lightsaber wound up the back, in a kriffing coma, and…”  Poe stopped rocking.  “And I figured it was going to be like any other campaign.  We lick our wounds and they lick theirs and everyone regroups.”  Poe hugged his legs tighter.  “Didn’t figure on them nearly knocking us out.”

 

Kes put a hand on his son’s back.  He’d heard most of the story from various beings around base—and to a one, none of them blamed Poe for anything that happened during the disastrous evac.  But Kes knew his son, knew that Poe counted every single one of those deaths as his responsibility.  _You’re punishing yourself, aren’t you?_  

 

Poe kept talking, “He woke up in the middle of it, and then, we’re trying to outrun the Order and I’m sending him and Rose off on that stupid, blasted mission and…”  He shook his head.  “There wasn’t time.”

 

“What about after?”

 

Poe gave a mirthless chuckle, curling up even more.  “I’m running the whole damn Resistance now, Dad.  Don’t really have time to—”

 

“Bullshit,” Kes said.  “Don’t have time?!?  That’s the best you can come up with?”

 

“We’re not really going to do this again, are we, Dad?”

 

“Poe, I’m not questioning your chops as a leader.  You are a kriffing fantastic leader!  I’m…I’m questioning why you seem to feel the need to come up with bullshit excuses to stay away from the man you clearly love.”

 

Poe let his legs fall.  “It’s…  It’s complicated,” he said.  “Not like with you.”

 

“You really think it was easy for me to tell your mama how I felt?  It wasn’t!  Hell, even after, it wasn’t easy.  One or both of us were always in danger, and then, after she had you, we had to send you away.  You know what that’s like?  Sending your only child—the thing you love most in the entire galaxy—away?  I didn’t know if I’d ever see you again, if she would either.  It was hell.  So don’t even try to start with the _there’s no time_ shit.”

 

“And what I am supposed to say, Dad, huh?  _Hey, Finn, I know that you and I haven’t really known each other that long, but I think I’m in love with you and hey, no pressure, just because now I’m your commanding officer and all…and even though it’s pretty clear that you’re probably in love with Rey or Rose or…hell, for all I know, you’re in love with kriffing_ _Kaydel_.”  Poe scooted off the ledge towards the path and started pacing, pulling at his hair with a growl.

 

“Kaydel?  Really?”  Poe shot his father a deadly look and Kes put his hands up.  “Okay,” he said, “I hear you.”  Kes got off the ledge and stood in his son’s path.  “But if you really love him, you have to try.”

 

Poe stood there, staring at his father, hating that he felt he was disappointing him.  Finally, he said, in a voice that sounded like eight-year-old Poe, “Dad.”

 

“Son,” Kes started.

 

“Dad,” Poe whined.

 

“Please, son,” Kes said, pulling Poe into a hug.  “We are looking at some really tough times ahead, and I don’t want to think that you’re going to be making yourself miserable because of what you _think_ you know.”  He pulled back and looked Poe in the eye, using his thumb to wipe a stray tear from his son’s cheek.  “My beautiful Poe.  Always trying to protect everyone around him.”  He gave his son a sad smile.  “Please promise me that you won’t torture yourself.  That you’ll try to find some happiness.  Please tell me that you’ll tell him how you feel before it’s too late.”

 

Poe wanted to argue, wanted to tell his father that it was a stupid crush and that he deserved to be tortured and that he didn’t have time and… All of his excuses rattled in his head and he knew that they were simply that: excuses.  He started shaking.

 

Kes pulled him back into the hug, and he held his son.  Poe cried, letting the past few months of grief and guilt and a million other things wash over him.  “I love you, Dad.”

 

“I know, son.  I love you too.”

 

**# # # #**

 

Dy watched as a ship landed on the outskirts of the village near the amphitheater.  He tensed, debating about whether he should go inform the village elders or not.  He couldn’t think of what the Order might want with a small farming community on Felucia, but there didn’t seem to be much logic to the Order’s movements these days.  Yet, it was only one ship, and surely if the Order were to arrive, it would be more than one ship.

 

Dy left his hut, pulling on his shoes as he started down the path towards the amphitheater.  A part of his brain told him that smart men didn’t leave their huts in the middle of the night to go search out strangers, but something in his gut told him this was worth investigating.

 

The ship stood in the field, its lights on low, but still managing to make the grasses glow a strange red.  Dy stopped jogging, suddenly afraid.  He heard something behind him and turned to see Teean coming up behind him.

 

“What are you doing here,” Teean sneered.

 

“What are you,” Dy countered.  Teean was only about three years younger than Dy, but Dy had always felt awkward around the younger man.  He’d never fit in with Teean’s crowd.  He’d never fit in with anyone in the village, really.

 

The ramp to the ship lowered and both of them stared at it, unconsciously stepping closer together as it hit the ground with a dull thud.

 

“Do you think it’s the Oder,” Dy asked.

 

“It’s not the Order,” Teean said, far more surely than Dy expected.

 

A woman came out and strode down the ramp, walking towards the two of them with purpose.  Dy took a step back.  Teean grabbed his arm.  “No, it’s…she’s okay.”

 

Dy stared at Teean, as if he’d never seen the young man before, but said nothing.

 

The woman came to stop about ten feet in front of them.  She stared at them intently.  Dy felt naked in front of her.  She turned to Teean.  “It’s you,” she said.

 

Teean nodded.  “And you,” he said.  “I felt you coming.”

 

There was a sound at the ship and Dy looked over to see three small children at the top of the ramp.  The woman turned around.  “It’s okay,” she called back.  She turned to Teean.  “Do you want to come with us?”

 

“Where?”

 

The woman shrugged.  “I don’t know yet.  I’m still trying to find others.”

 

“Others,” Dy asked.

 

She startled, as if she’d forgotten he was there.  “Others like your friend…and me.”

 

Dy nearly expected Teean to tell her they weren’t friends.  Instead, Teean reached out his hand to her.  “Teean.  And this is Dy.”

 

“Rey,” the woman said, shaking Teean’s hand.  “Do you want to come,” she asked again.

 

Teean nodded.

 

“Good,” she said with a sweet smile.  She indicated they should go back to the ship.

 

“I,” Teean started.  “I need to get my things, leave a note.”

 

“Oh,” Rey said.  _Family._   “Yes.  Go.”

 

Teean smiled and gave her a nod before taking off back down the path.  When he had disappeared from sight, Dy asked, “Can I come too?”

 

Rey hesitated.  Children were one thing, but strange young men were another. 

 

“I…”  Dy licked his lips and stepped forward.  “There’s nothing for me here.  My family died six winters ago.  I, I, I don’t have anyone else.  I just…”  He looked at her ship in awe.  “I always wanted to make a difference.”  He looked back at her.  “You’re going to fight the Order, right?”

 

“Yes,” Rey said.

 

Dy hit the mechanism on his ring, holding the starbird symbol up to Rey.  “Then let me help.  I’m not special.  I’m no one, but…”

 

_No one_.  Rey’s heart broke.  She smiled and held out her hand.  “I’m Rey.”

 

“Dy,” he said.

 

“Let’s go meet the children, Dy.”

 

**# # # #**

 

“It seems little brother has been busy,” Asha said, coming into a small lounge and spying Kessa and Kaya at the bar.

 

“How so,” Kessa asked, holding up a bottle of something dark blue.  Asha nodded, and she poured.

 

“The best Father’s people can figure, he’s been squirreling away money and tech for a long while and now…”  Asha pulled at the neck of his shirt, undoing the top two buttons.  “And now, he’s run off and joined the Resistance.”

 

“Kriff,” Kessa said.

 

“Just like Alli,” Kaya murmured into her drink. 

 

“And he’s going to get himself killed like Alli,” Kessa said.

 

“Father already has a bounty out on him,” Asha said, gulping down his drink in one go.

 

“Kriff,” Kessa said.

 

“How much,” Kaya asked.

 

Asha shook his head.  “I didn’t ask.”

 

All three refilled their cups and stared blankly into the room.

 

“Think they’ll get him,” Kaya asked quietly.

 

Asha sighed.  “Maker, I hope not.”

 

**# # # #**

 

The night before Finn was scheduled to leave, Kes found him sitting on a rock on the edge of the tarmac, meditating.  He sighed _.  Why do both of these boys feel like they have to keep it all inside?_   He felt the ring dangling around his neck and thought of Shara.  _You’d know what to say to them.  You’d know how to get them where they need to be._

 

He grimaced as he slowly made his way over to Finn, who opened his eyes as Kes approached.

 

“I’m not interrupting?”

 

Finn shook his head.

 

“Worried about the op?”

 

“Yeah,” Finn said, scooting over and patting the area next to him.  At this time of night, there weren’t many beings outside, but somewhere in the distance, Finn could hear snippets of chatter.  It was nice.  _Starting to feel like a real base._

 

Kes settled in next to Finn with a groan.  “What has you tight, son?”  Finn shrugged.  “Don’t know or don’t want to talk about it?”

 

Finn sighed.  “A little bit of both.”

 

Kes nodded.  After a minute, he said, “Before Endor, Shara and I had about ten minutes alone together, and I just remember being so kriffing frustrated.  I mean, first of all, there were about a million ways that the op could go south.  Well, and frankly it did go south, but also…  There were so many things I wanted to tell her and…”  He slapped his hands on his thighs.  “Never been much for words.”

 

Finn chukled.  “I think you do alright.”

 

Kes laughed and then it caught in his throat.  “I was so damn scared that that was it, you know?  Like, one of us wasn’t going to come back, and…”  He took a long shakey breath.  “When the Death Star exploded, I had this moment.  Fuck.  I…”  He turned to Finn.  “There were so many things I hadn’t told her.”

 

“Weren’t you married,” Finn asked.

 

Kes said, “Yeah, we’d been together for a while, already had Poe, but, but…  It didn’t mean that there weren’t still things she needed to hear, things I needed to say.”

 

“But she did make it out.  You both did.”

 

“Thank the maker,” Kes said, pulling the chain from around his neck and kissing the ring hanging from it.

 

Finn stared out into the night.  “I don’t want to die,” he said.  “Don’t figure many of us do, but…”  He frowned.  “I…”  He turned to fully face Kes.  “I just got this life, you know?  I don’t want to lose it.”

 

“And you won’t,” Kes said.

 

“You don’t know that,” Finn spat out, hating how vicious he sounded.

 

“I have to keep a little faith,” Kes said, unphased.

 

Finn gave a strange chuckle.  “So, that’s where Poe gets it from?”

 

Kes smiled.  “Probably.”  He turned and stared at Finn.  _Might as well try._   “You two, you…”

 

Finn blinked and looked away from Kes.  “You weren’t supposed to have emotions in the Order; you weren’t supposed to care.  There were no friends, no…no relationships.”  He leaned forward, rocking, as if he wanted to run.  “I’m still trying to figure all of this out.”

 

Kes nodded, putting a hand on Finn’s shoulder and squeezing.  “I know.”  Finn ducked his head.  “You want my advice?”

 

“Hell, yes,” Finn said, looking up.

 

“Just speak from the heart.  Tell him—”

 

“Kes,” Finn started.

 

Kes kept going, “Just tell him what you’re thinking, even if it’s not clear to you yet.  Don’t go away wondering.”

 

“Put my cards on the table,” Finn muttered.

 

“Yes,” Kes said.

 

Finn was terrified of the prospect.

 

Kes pulled him into a quick hug.  “Think of it this way, if you were to die out there—which, let me be clear, I don’t expect to happen—but if it did, wouldn’t you want him to know?”

 

_I don’t even know_ , Finn thought.

 

“Just think about it, okay?”  Kes waited a moment.  “Okay?”

 

“Okay.”  Finn nodded, wondering if this is what it felt like to have a parent.

 

**# # # #**

 

“Boss,” Ega yelled from the front of the shop.  “You have a visitor.”

 

Snap slipped the safety off his blaster.  _Visitor_ was code for one of the many criminals who still made Myrra home.  Snap walked out front, fighting against rolling his eyes.  “What do you want, Trent?”

 

“What,” Trent asked, pretending to be offended.

 

Snap repeated, “What do you want, Trent?”  Snap had known Trent’s father back in the day, and from their interactions in the months since Snap had returned to Akiva, he’d come to learn that Trent had managed to pick up all his father’s sliminess and none of his brains.

 

“A word in private, perhaps?”

 

“Yeah,” Snap said, jerking his head towards the back.  “Just make it quick.”

 

“Of course!  Of course!”  Trent rushed to the back.  As soon as they were alone, he leaned in, whispering.  “I have a proposition for you.”

 

“Not interested.”

 

“You haven’t even heard—”

 

“Not interested,” Snap repeated.

 

Trent shook his head.  “It’s not like that, Wexley.  This is…this comes from way up in the syndicate.”

 

“The what?”

 

“The syndicate.”  Trent smiled.  “I keep forgetting you’ve been out of the game for a while.  Group of…loosely affiliated criminal organizations.  They offer up protection and support and the like.”

 

Snap raised an eyebrow.

 

“We protect our own,” Trent said defensively.

 

“And?”

 

“You’ve caught someone’s attention.  They’ve invited you out to a meeting.  I think they wanna see if you’d like to join.”

 

Snap’s eyes narrowed at that.  He was pretty certain that if this syndicate had any power at all, they’d have done their homework on him.  _Maybe this is a way to reach out to the Resistance?_   Snap suddenly thought about Poe and Iolo and…

 

_Karé._

 

He let out a breath, banishing the thoughts.  “So, what exactly would this entail?”

 

“Next meeting is in a few days at Junkfort Station.”

 

“Of course, it is.”  _Neutral territory._

 

“I’m supposed to take you there, and then,” Trent shrugged, “we’ll see.”

 

“If I’m going, I’m taking Nyss with me.”

 

“Sure, sure.  Whatever you say.”  Trent looked at him expectantly.

 

Snap wasn’t sure if he was nervous because it was a bad idea or because this just might put him one step closer to the Resistance.  “Set it up, then.”

 

“You’ve got it,” Trent said with a smile, rushing back into the shop and then out into the early evening.

 

Ega raised an eyebrow as Snap emerged from the back. 

 

Snap shook his head.  “I guess we’re moving onto the next phase of this thing.”

**# # # #**

 

Kaydel and Rose watched as Zeb and Finn packed up the last of their things onto a small transport.

 

“You think he’ll come,” Rose asked.

 

“He’ll come,” Kaydel said.  “Amir said he was going to drag him out here if he had to.”

 

Rose groaned at the mention of Amir.

 

“Not a fan,” Kaydel asked.

 

“Of rich princes who suddenly decide they’re going to deign to help the good guys?  No.”

 

Kaydel smiled.  “I think there might be more to it than that.”

 

Rose was about to argue the point when she spotted Poe coming out to the tarmac.  She nodded his way. 

 

Kaydel sighed.  “Oh thank goodness.”

 

“Why don’t they just tell each other,” Rose said.

 

“Because they’re idiots,” Kaydel said.  She then chanced a glance over at Rose. “And,” she sighed, “let’s be honest, it’s a little scary to put yourself out there like that.”

 

Rose shrugged _.  I did it._

 

_Of course, I thought I was going to die at the time…_

 

“Yeah,” Rose said.  “Scary.”

 

**# # # #**

 

Poe stood at the base of the ramp.  “You have everything?”

 

“We’re good, General,” Zeb said.

 

Poe nodded.  “Good.”  He thrust his hands in his pockets and rocked back on his heels.  “Colonel?  I was wondering if I might have a word before you took off?”

 

Since Poe had agreed to the mission a week ago, he and Finn had been… _polite_ to each other.  Finn felt it deep in his chest, as if someone had reached in and filled his lungs with ice water.  He hated being around Poe when things were like this.  Plus, Kes’s words from the night before kept ringing in his ears.  “Sure,” Finn said.  He turned to Zeb.  “Go ahead and warm her up.”

 

Zeb nodded.  “General,” he said with a nod.

 

“Take care,” Poe said, waving.

 

Finn came down the ramp and Poe motioned to the far side of the ship.

 

**# # # #**

 

Kes came over and stood next to Kaydel and Rose.  “They about to leave?”

 

Kaydel nodded.  “Zeb’s doing the preliminaries.  Finn and Poe are over there talking.”

 

Kes followed her pointing finger and saw his son and Finn standing at the back of the ship.  _Just tell him_ , he thought at both of them.  _Don’t let this be your one big regret._

 

**# # # #**

 

“Um,” Poe said, ducking his head.  “I know things have been a bit…formal with us lately.”

 

“Yeah,” Finn said.

 

“And,” Poe said, his hand reaching up to card through his hair before he stopped and shoved it back into his pocket.  “I just…”  He finally looked up at Finn.  “I didn’t want there to be any hard feelings between us.”

 

Finn let out a long breath.  “Me either.”  He leaned forward.  “I haven’t liked this, this…whatever has been going on between us this past week.”

 

“I know,” Poe said.  “And,” he took Finn’s arm, “you have to know.  This had nothing to do with what I think of you as a solider, Finn.  Kriff!  You’re the best damn soldier I’ve ever met!”

 

Finn laughed.  “Poe.”

 

“No, I’m serious.”

 

“Then why?”

 

“You understand the odds of this mission going south are pretty high, right?  And…and if that happens, then we not only lose our friend, Finn, we lose all the blasted symbolism of having an ex-Stormtrooper in our ranks.  And the Order gets to tell everyone that traitors don’t last very long.”  He realized he was still holding Finn’s arm.  He let go.  “But, also, come on, man!  I’ve nearly lost you twice in recent memory.  Maybe I’m just being protective of my friend.”

 

Finn suddenly felt brave.  “Is that all?”

 

“Is what all?”

 

“Am I just a friend?”

 

Poe’s breath caught.  “Kriff,” he whispered.  “No.”  Poe wanted to say more.  He wanted to move his hand to Finn's cheek and step closer and tell him so many things.  But he couldn’t.  _I can’t start a relationship with you when you’re getting ready to leave.  I can’t burden you with that._   He breathed out, “Finn, this is a dangerous mission.”

 

“Yeah, and I can handle that.”

 

“Yeah, but there is still a chance that you might not come back, and…and…”

 

“And?”  Finn stepped closer.

 

Poe chickened out a second time.  “And…and you’re pretty damn irreplaceable to the Resistance.”

 

“Just the Resistance,” Finn asked.  He’d leaned in a bit.

 

“No,” Poe said.  “Not just the Resistance.”

 

Finn’s eyes bored into Poe’s.  “To who else?”

 

“Finn,” Poe whispered, his voice breaking a bit.  He grabbed Finn’s arm again.  “You have to know…”  This was the moment.  Both of them knew it.  This was the moment when they could make it happen.  All it would take would be either of them moving forward just an inch and…

 

Zeb called out, “Ready whenever you are!”

 

The spell was broken.

 

Poe let go of Finn’s arm and Finn felt all his bravado fade away.  He stepped back, blinking, feeling as if he’d just been slapped.  “Uh,” he turned back towards the ship.  “We really should be…”

 

“Yeah, of course,” Poe said.

 

Finn felt hollow as he started to walk away, but then Poe grabbed his arm yet again, tugging him back.  “No,” he said.  “I…”  He let out a long breath, struggling to find the words.  “Just be careful out there, okay, buddy?”

 

“I will, Poe.”

 

“Come back to me,” Poe said.

 

Finn felt that plea settle in his chest and it felt good.  “I will.”

 

“Promise?”

 

“I promise,” Finn whispered.

 

Poe reached into his pocket and grabbed something, shoving it into Finn’s hand.  “For luck,” he said, pressing a quick kiss to Finn’s cheek.  He started walking away and then stopped, saying, “Just don’t lose it like you did the jacket.”

 

Finn smiled, touching his free hand to his cheek, which was still tingling.  “Yes, sir, General.”

 

Poe threw him a lazy salute and walked back towards the base.

 

Finn looked at what Poe had pressed into his hand.  A brushed steel washer on a metal chain.  He smiled.  He’d seen Poe wearing it before.  It was like the one Kes wore.  _Good luck charm_.  He pulled it over his neck and jogged to the transport.

 

**# # # #**

 

“Holy kriffing fuck,” Kes breathed out.

 

“What,” Rose asked.  “Poe’s necklace?”

 

“That’s his mother’s wedding ring,” Kes said.

 

All three watched in stunned silence as Finn’s and Zeb’s transport lifted off.

 

 


	14. Heretic and Fighter

 

 

He’d promised himself he wasn’t going to obsess over the fact that he’d given Finn his Mama’s ring.  _It’s done_ , Poe told himself, walking to command.  _It’s done, and I can’t take it back._

_And he probably doesn’t know what it means anyway._

 

Poe gave himself a nod, as if agreeing with himself.

 

_Just a gift between friends._

_Exactly._

_A gift between friends._

 

He refused to listen to the other voice in his head that was currently laughing at that.

 

Poe’s fretting quieted as soon as he reached command and Maz came up beside him.  “Things are starting to come together.”

 

“Seems like it,” Poe said.  He looked down at her.  “So, are you here to throw a wrench into my plans?”

 

“No,” Maz said.  “Maybe complicate them, but nothing so drastic as that.”  She gestured to the far side of the space. 

 

Poe moved over.  “What’s on your mind, Maz?”

 

She held out a datachip.  “An old friend of mine.  I think it’s worth seeking her out.”  

 

Poe took the datachip and frowned.  “Any reason you aren’t contacting her directly?”

 

“I think it’s time that we spread our resources out a bit.  I know that Sabine Wren’s people have a cell on Bandomeer and Rey is…”

 

“Somewhere,” Poe said with a sigh.

 

“I think it would be wise for me to set up my own cell now as well.”

 

Poe raised an eyebrow.  “Anyplace in particular?”

 

“I have some friends on Cerea.  I think they might be amenable to the cause.”

 

Poe smiled.  “And how many beings would you need to take with you?”

 

“Not many,” she said.  “Two or three at most.”

 

Poe nodded.  “When were you thinking of leaving?”

 

“Soon,” Maz said.  “I have a feeling that with Amir making a split with his family, things are about to ratchet up.”

 

“Yeah,” Poe said, crossing his arms.  “I’ve been thinking the same thing.”

 

Maz reached over and squeezed his arm, nodding at the datachip.  “Send someone to go talk to Queenie.  I think she’ll have some good news for us.”

 

“Queenie?”

 

“I never caught her real name,” Maz said.  “Besides, Queenie fits her.  You’ll see,” Maz said with a mysterious smile.

 

“General,” Koo said from across the room.  “Ummmmm…”

 

Poe shared a worried look with Maz and dashed over.

 

A group of beings were huddled around Koo’s station.  “What are we watching,” Maz asked, walking up behind them.

 

“Chandrila,” Koo answered.  “Seems the beings there started a revolt.” 

 

Maz smiled.

 

Kaydel shook her head.  “The Order landed a few hours ago.  Already reports of thousands dead.  Most of Hanna City is on fire.”

 

“Those animals,” Maz whispered.  _All the Order knows is destruction._  

 

“Hux is broadcasting the usual stuff,” Kaydel said, listening to her earpiece. 

 

“Turn it off,” Poe said.  “And get all the commanders in here.”

 

Kaydel nodded.

 

Poe moved to the table in the center of the room.  Beings jogged up quickly and once Poe saw that most everyone was present, he started talking.  “The Order are starting to lash out at potential allies, hoping that they’re going to scare beings into backing down or rolling over.”  He looked over at Maz.  “Leia, Chewie, and Lando are trying to start something with some old smuggling friends of theirs.  Rey is out…recruiting, and we know that Sabine Wren is trying to make headway on Mandalore.  Thanks to the new influx of credits and tech from Sergeant Rennal,” he nodded to Amir, “we’re more comfortable than we’ve been in a long while, which means I think it’s time to start changing our strategy.”

 

“Meaning,” Rose asked.

 

“Meaning, spreading out and going on the offensive.”  There were some murmurs and shuffling.  Poe kept on talking.  “Maz is going to take some of her people and set up a new splinter cell out on Cerea.  And Karé, Iolo, and the pilots have suggested starting small-scale attacks against known First Order instillations.”

 

There was more murmuring.

 

“Yes,” Poe asked the room.

 

“Won’t that be dangerous,” Koo asked.

 

“Yes,” Poe said, “but we’ve reached the point where we need to start hitting back.”  He looked over at Karé and Iolo.

 

Iolo said, “These will be small attacks.  One or two pilots at most.  Mainly aiming at communications posts and supply stations.”

 

“Anything that can disrupt the usual flow of things,” Karé added.

 

“I’m also going to set up a mission to a new potential ally,” Poe said.  He looked at Maz.

 

She said, “She may be able to put us in touch with beings willing to fight the Order, and she’ll be another source of weapons and tech.”

 

“What all of this means,” Poe said, “is that we’re about to become more of a target.”  He sighed, moving around the table.  “We’ve been keeping our heads down, licking our wounds, because…well, because frankly, there weren’t enough of us to do much else.  But,” he said with a smile, “we’re gaining new recruits.  We finally have credits and ships and weapons and… And it’s time to start fighting again.”

 

The mood around the table was hard to read.  There was definitely anxiety, but there was also something else.

 

Finally, it was Iolo who broke the silence: “About damn time.”

 

There were smiles and chuckles from around the table.

 

“Okay, dismissed,” Poe said.

 

As beings started to move away, he caught Rose’s eye.  “A word?”

 

“Sure.”

 

“Amir,” he called out.  “Can I borrow you for a moment too?”

 

“Sure,” Amir said, his brow wrinkling.

 

Poe pulled the two of them off to the side.  He found the datachip that Maz had given him.  “I’m assigning the two of you to this mission.”

 

“What,” Rose demanded.

 

“Yeah, I’m with her: _what_?”

 

Poe tried not to roll his eyes.  “Rose, you’re one of the new leaders of the Resistance, and I’ve heard your broadcasts.  If anyone could inspire someone to join up with us, it’s you.”

 

Rose’s cheeks went bright red.  “Thanks,” she muttered.

 

“And Rennal, you have experience negotiating with all types.”

 

“True.”

 

“I don’t know anything about this Queenie that Maz is suggesting—”

 

“Queenie,” Rennal asked.

 

“Yeah, Maz doesn’t know her real name.”  Poe said, “But I’ve got to figure you’ve handled all sorts of middle men in your day.”

 

Rennal nodded.

 

“Good,” Poe said.  “Look over Maz’s information, put together a flight plan, and get back to me.”  He walked away.

 

Rennal looked down at Rose and deadpanned, “Are you as excited about this as I am?”

 

“Thrilled,” she said through clenched teeth before swiping the datachip from his hands and marching towards an open console.

 

“Oh, this is going to be fun,” Rennal said, following her.

 

**# # # #**

 

BB-8 beeped incredulously at Poe.

 

“What,” Poe said, stalking towards his bunk.  “You’ve been complaining since Threepio got his rank that I’m not letting you do enough and now you’re angry that I’m sending you out on assignment?”

 

[I do not trust Desgination Ally-Amir.]

 

Poe raised his eyebrow.  “Ally?  Really?”  BB-8 ignored the question.  “Do I even want to know what you called Finn when you first met him?”

 

[Designation Jacket-Thief.]

 

Poe burst out laughing.  “Oh, I can’t wait to tell him that.”  Poe almost immediately sobered, wondering if Finn was okay.  BB-8 seemed to sense the shift in mood; it rolled over, pressing into Poe’s leg.  Poe looked down.  “Look, buddy, I just think that you can be helpful on this mission.  If nothing else, you’ll keep Rose and Amir from killing each other.”  He kneeled down.  “Please, buddy?  For me?”

 

[You are trying to make me feel guilty, but you can’t.  I’m a droid.]

 

“Please,” Poe said, making his eyes wide.

 

If BB-8 could’ve huffed, it would have.  [Fine.]

 

“Thanks, buddy!”

 

BB-8 let forth a series of low beeps that Poe was pretty sure the droid equivalent of grumbling.  He ignored it as he settled into his cot.  He reached over and rubbed the top of BB-8’s dome.  “You’re doing me a huge favor, Bee, and I won’t forget it.”

 

[Does this mean I can get a rank?]

 

“We’ll see, buddy.  We’ll see.”

 

**# # # #**

 

Two days later, Amir looked over at the pilot’s seat where Rose was staring up ahead, a steely look in her eyes.  He glanced back at Dameron’s droid, which the General had insisted they take with them, “for backup.”  Amir shook his head and leaned over, cradling it in his hand.  _What in the hell am I doing here?_

 

A month ago, he’d been one of the richest beings in the galaxy, his every whim catered to.  Now?  Now, he was a member of the most rag-tag assemblage of beings he’d ever seen.

 

_Going out on missions_ , he thought with a laugh.  _Like I am in any way qualified to be here_.  He snuck a look back over at Rose.  _And I’m certainly not welcome_.  He closed his eyes with a sigh, pinching the bridge of his nose.  “So, you wanna tell me exactly why I piss you off so much, Tico?”

 

Rose’s eyes never left the white of hyperspace in front of them.  “No.”

 

Amir groaned and sat up, turning to face her.  “Come on,” he said.  “We have six hours until we get to Nar Kreeta.  You really going to spend the entire time not talking to me?”

 

“Ideally,” Rose said.

 

Amir gave a theatrical sigh and turned to BB-8.  “You have any insight?”

 

The droid rolled over and cocked its head to the side. 

 

“Why doesn’t Commander Tico like me?”

 

The droid looked from Amir to Rose and back again.  [The other one seemed friendly at first too.]

 

Amir looked over to Rose.  “What did the droid say?”

 

Rose rolled her eyes and finally looked at him.  “You asked Bee even though you don’t understand binary?”

 

“Who else am I gonna talk to?”

 

Rose growled.  “Are you incapable of just sitting there quietly?”

 

“Yes!”  Amir stood, pacing the small transport.  “I’m not used to this!  I’m used to…”

 

“Yachts and beings serving you and having everything you could ever want,” Rose said.

 

“Exactly!”

 

“Oh you poor thing,” Rose deadpanned.  “I feel so sorry for you.”

 

“So, wait.  Is this a rich—poor thing?”

 

Rose turned her chair around to face him.  “A rich—poor thing?”

 

“Yeah, like you hate all rich beings or something?”

 

“I hate beings that earn their wealth exploiting others.  I hate beings who don’t earn their money, but instead inherit it and then do nothing other than get fat off their riches.  I hate—”

 

“I get it,” Amir said, collapsing back into his seat.

 

“You’re the one who wanted to talk,” Rose said, crossing her arms.

 

Amir eyed her for a moment.  “It doesn’t matter that I’m giving the Resistance all of my money and—”

 

“I’ve been burned before,” Rose said through clenched teeth.

 

Amir’s eyebrow rose.  “Oh, there’s a story there.”

 

“Yes, there’s a story there, but it’s not one that I have to—”

 

“Six hours, Tico.  Six long, looooooong hours.”  Amir was smiling.  “Six hours.  Six.  Six. Six.”

 

“Shut up,” Rose said.  “Shut up.  Shut up.  Shut up!”

 

“Talk to me,” Amir said.

 

Rose swiveled to him again.  “See?  That’s it.  Right there.  You want to know why I don’t like you?  Fine.  One, I don’t know you.  I have no reason to trust you.  Poe, he trusts just about everyone.”

 

“Including that ex-Stormtrooper.”

 

“His name is Finn,” Rose gritted out.

 

Amir fought against his smile.  He loved getting under a being’s skin and Tico was just too damn easy.  “Ahhhh, right.”

 

“Two, you’re rich, and yeah, I might have something against the rich in general, but your family in particular.  You think I don’t know how your family made its money?  You think I don’t know that they’re helping the Order get more ships and weapons even as we speak?”

 

“That’s my family, not—”

 

“So, you’re saying that the money you brought us, it’s clean?”

 

Amir’s smile wavered.

 

Rose continued, “Three, I’ve been burned.  Finn and I went out on a mission, and there was this guy.  He had all the answers, ready to help, and…”  She got a faraway look in her eyes as she remembered the sound of the laser axe next to her neck.

 

“Tico?”

 

“He betrayed us.  Sold us out to the Order.”  Rose was more than mad at this point.  “ _Don’t take sides_ , he said.  You want to know what that means?  It means you’re too cowardly to choose a side.  It means you don’t care about anyone but yourself.”

 

Amir opened his mouth, but Rose continued, “Finally, you want to know why I don’t like you?  Because you’re the type that thinks it’s my job to entertain you if you’re bored.  I want to sit here in silence, but no!  Amir is bored, so we have to talk.  You don’t think about others.  You only think about yourself and what you want,” she said.  “That a good enough explanation for you?”

 

“Perfect,” he said, completely deflated.

 

“Can we go back to not talking now?”

 

“Definitely,” Amir said, leaning back in his chair and staring out into the white nothingness.

 

**# # # #**

 

“You ready, boss,” Iolo asked as they came out of hyperspace.

 

“So ready,” Karé said.  She smiled.  Without looking, she knew that Iolo and Nien were flanking her.  “Feels good to be doing something again.”

 

“Roger that,” Iolo said.  “You good, Nunb?”

 

“Yeah,” Nien said.

 

Karé laughed.  “Always did like the strong silent type.”  She stared at the screen, waiting for the go-ahead from her droid.  “On my mark,” she said.  She took a breath and held it.  At the beep, she gave a quick nod.  “Let’s do this.”

 

The three ships streaked through the atmosphere, headed towards a suspected First Order Communications Post.

 

Karé’s grip tightened as she spotted it.  “Lo, I want a confirmation before—”

 

“Working on it, boss,” he said, already pulling ahead of her and Nien. 

 

When they were less than two klicks away, they started taking fire.

 

“That’s all the confirmation I need,” Karé said.  “You know what to do, gentlemen.”

 

**# # # #**

 

Poe was deliberately trying not to hover.  This was C’ai’s job, technically, and Poe was supposed to be going over plans for a possible ground assault on a First Order outpost near Kessel with Tansirch and C-3P0.  Finally, Tansirch said, “Just go over there, sir.”

 

“But…”

 

Tansirch looked to the droid.  “I think Threepio and I can handle the particulars for a bit.”

 

“Thanks,” Poe said, jogging over. 

 

Kaydel rolled her eyes.

 

Poe ignored her and raised an eyebrow.

 

“They’re fine, Poe.”  She looked back down at the screen.  “They hit the post, disabled it.  Iolo’s going to be limping back, but they are all already in hyperspace.”

 

Poe let out a relieved breath. 

 

Kaydel reached over and squeezed his arm.  “Trust us.  We know how to do our jobs.”

 

“It’s not that,” Poe said.  “It’s…”  _I should be out there with them_.  He licked his lips, picking up a headpiece and holding the earphone to his ear.  “Hey guys, good work out there.”

 

“Thanks, General,” Karé said.

 

“Feels good to be fighting again,” Iolo added.

 

“I bet,” Poe said, feeling a fleeting sense of jealousy.  He put the headpiece down and smiled at Kaydel.  “Let me know when they land.”

 

“Yes, sir.”

 

**# # # #**

 

They’d left BB-8 with the ship—figuring the droid was a bit too recognizable, especially on a planet like Nar Kreeta—and they were now wandering the streets, trying to follow Maz’s directions.  As they got closer to what Amir figured was the building, Amir started to notice more and more tell-tale signs that they were in the red-light district.

 

_Not like I haven’t visited my fair share_ , he thought to himself.  He looked over at Rose, who seemed, blessedly, oblivious.

 

Amir looked down at the flimsi in his hand and back up at a large building, done over in the most outrageously gaudy shades of burgundy and purple imaginable. 

 

“This is the address,” Amir said.  He turned to Rose, his hand poised above the buzzer.  “I know you don’t like me, but we both know that it’s probably a good idea to let me do the talking in here, yes?”

 

“Yes,” Rose said.  “I have a feeling she’s going to be more your _type._ ”

 

“Did my family do something to you personally or—”

 

“You really want to talk about that again?  Now?”

 

“Right,” Amir said.  He pressed the buzzer.

 

A man’s voice came over the speaker.  “Yeah?”

 

“We’re here to see Queenie.”

 

There was nothing for several seconds.  Amir and Rose traded a confused look.  Then, the door slid open and a tall Twi’lek male answered the door.  He was wearing a series of strategically-placed straps—and nothing else.

 

“Holy kriff,” Amir said. 

 

“Yes,” the Twi’lek asked.

 

“Sorry, I…”  Amir had no words.

 

“Is this a brothel,” Rose asked, peering inside behind the Twi'lek

 

The Twi'lek smiled.  “Yes.”  He gestured for them to enter.

 

Amir recovered first and walked in, tugging on Rose’s sleeve to get her to follow.

 

Once inside, the Twi'lek led them to a large central room.  There was a sweeping staircase to one side and several rooms—like spokes—leading off in various directions.  From what little Amir could see, there was quite the party going on.  There were several beings in various states of undress walking around.

 

Rose flushed and looked up at the ceiling.

 

Amir’s eyes settled on the staircase and a curvy human woman, who he judged to be in her forties or fifties.  She was different.  Besides the grey hair piled high on her head, she was fully clothed.  But there was also something else.

 

While the family name had ensured that for the most part, in business dealings, he got middle men to deal with the truly disreputable types, from time to time, Amir had met with grizzled criminals, the kinds of beings who had a hardness to them—as if their very humanity had been slowly ground away.  On first glance, Queenie had that look, and Amir had no doubt that that was the kind of aura she tried to project, but the closer she got, the more he was convinced that it was a façade.  There was a gleam in her eye, a spark of something that told him that she still gave a damn.

 

He took a breath, hoping against hope that he was reading that gleam right and that it meant that she might help them.  Amir looked over to Rose, who was glaring at the older woman.

 

“Queenie,” the Twi’lek called out.  “Two of ‘em to see you!”

 

Queenie was already looking them over, but now she smiled—the kind of fake smile one wore when they weren’t sure how a situation was going to fall out.  She raised an eyebrow.  “You have business with me?”

 

Amir stepped forward and bowed.  “Cassian Frel and Lilly A’mal.  Maz Kanata sent us.”

 

He had to hand it to the woman; she didn’t even blink.  She considered what he’d said for a moment and then nodded.  “Fine,” she said, turning and going back up the stairs.  “Let’s talk in my office.”

 

Rose made a disgusted little noise and Queenie stopped.  “You have a problem with that?”

 

“I have a problem with all of this,” Rose said, pointing towards the main room.

 

Amir tensed.

 

Queenie chuckled.  “You have something against sex workers?”

 

“I have something about exploiting beings and—”

 

“Archan,” Queenie called out to the Twi’lek who had answered the door.  “This one thinks I’m exploiting you.”

 

He laughed.  “I guess she doesn’t know what we’re charging you in rent, then, does she?”

 

Queenie leaned in.  “The brothel is a co-op, dear.  I don’t own it or run it.  I rent a room upstairs from them.  They’re all equal owners, and all here by choice.”

 

Amir raised an eyebrow, and Queenie said, “Two places in the galaxy a being of any species or station can walk in and no one asks any questions: a cantina or a brothel.”  She turned.  “And I don’t like alcohol.”  She started back up the stairs and Amir tried hard to hide his smile at the shocked look on Rose’s face.

 

**# # # #**

 

“…and I turned a corner and,” Rey smiled a wide smile, “there they were: Han, Chewie, and Finn.”  She shook her head.  “They came for me.”

 

“Wow,” Arashell whispered.

 

“What happened next,” Dy asked, leaning forward and looking as eager as any of the children.

 

“We decided to help the pilots.  We had some explosives, so we went to the thermal oscillator and…”  She swallowed hard.  “Kylo Ren was there.  Han went out to talk to him, to try to bring him back, but…”  She could feel the tears welling behind her eyes.

 

“But he didn’t,” Temiri said.

 

Rey shook her head, quickly wiping her eyes.  “He killed Han.”  She closed her eyes, reliving those terrifying moments after.  “He chased me and Finn into the forest and…he nearly killed me.  Finn picked up the lightsaber and,” she smiled a sad smile this time, “he protected me, but…”  She took a deep breath.  “Ren slashed him up his back.”

 

The children gasped.

 

Rey nodded.  “But then, I woke up and called the lightsaber to me and…somehow I won.”

 

“Wow,” Oniho said.

 

Rey nodded.

 

“What happened to Finn,” Arashell asked.

 

Rey smiled.  “We got him back to the Resistance and now, he’s as good as new.”  _I hope._ She opened her mouth to tell them about Poe and the pilots when she felt it, a strange tug in the Force.  She turned her head.

 

Both Temiri and Teean seemed to feel it too.

 

Dy looked at them.  “What is it?”

 

Rey shook her head.

 

Teean said, “Lots of beings in pain.”

 

“Scared,” Temiri whispered.

 

Rey said, “Something bad nearby.”

 

Dy met her eye.  “Then, we should go see, right?”

 

Rey looked to the others, who all seemed to agree.  “Okay, then,” she said, walking back towards the cockpit.  “Let’s go take a look.”

 

**# # # #**

 

Queenie’s room wasn’t much.  There were some stuffed seats to one side, a bar to the other.  There was a table in the middle and a desk at the back.  Queenie walked to the desk, motioning to the two chairs in front of it.  “So, now that we’re alone, you want to cut through the bantha fodder and tell me your real names?”

 

“Ma’am,” Amir asked.

 

Queenie rolled her eyes as she sat down.  “Cassian Frel and Lilly A’mal?  Really?”  She chuckled, scrolling through her datapad.  She then turned it to Amir.  The screen held a picture of him with his family.  “The Rennal family.  What was this?  Two?  Three years ago?”

 

“Two,” Amir said, tensing.

 

Queenie’s eyes narrowed.  “I hear your brother was in the Hosnian System when it…”

 

“Yeah,” Amir said.

 

Queenie nodded, considering.  She then turned to Rose.  “And who’s our little crusader?”

 

Rose bristled.

 

Amir said, “Rose Tico.”

 

“Of the Resistance,” Queenie said.

 

“We both are,” Amir said.

 

Queenie hummed and leaned back in her chair.  “And so is Maz these days, I suspect.”

 

“Yes,” Amir said.

 

“And she sent you here because…”

 

“She thought you might be willing to help,” Amir said.

 

Queenie smiled, shaking her head.  “And what was the plan, exactly, Mister Rennal?”

 

“It’s actually Sergeant Rennal and Commander Tico,” Amir said.  “And honestly, I don’t know.  We were going to come here and see if you wanted to join up.”

 

Queenie hummed, contemplating that.

 

Rose leaned forward, finally speaking, “Why did Maz think you’d join?”

 

Queenie said, “I don’t know.  My parents fought in the Rebellion, so maybe it’s that.  I’ve always tried to do right by Organa and her lot, but…”

 

“You’ve never gotten involved,” Amir finished.

 

“No,” Queenie said.  “Learned a long time ago that you’ll live a lot longer in this galaxy if you don’t pick sides.”

 

“As long as you don’t live on Yavin IV or Bespin,” Rose muttered.

 

“What,” Queenie asked.

 

“I said, that you only live longer unless you’re unlucky enough to get in the Order’s way.  I’m sure there were plenty of beings in the Hosnian System who were just trying to mind their own business, not get involved.”

 

Queenie smiled and nodded to Amir.  “I like this one.  She’s got spunk.”

 

“And I’m getting sick and tired of beings who seem to think that this isn’t a life or death situation,” Rose said, her voice rising.  “Like it’s all some sort of game that we’re playing.”

 

“Oh, it’s not a game,” Queenie said.  She leaned forward.  “But you’re going to have to learn how to play, all the same, Commander Tico.”  She rose and made her way to the front of the desk.  “You can look down your nose all you want at beings like me, but let me make one thing clear: there’s blood on the hands of both sides.  Admittedly, the Order is about a million times worse, but up until a few months ago, siding with Leia’s Resistance also meant tacit support of the Republic, and there’s plenty of beings who were exploited by them as well.”  She shook her head with a sigh.  “There’s lots of them who are simply trying not to get squashed…by either the bad guys or the good ones.”

 

Rose crossed her arms.  “So what?  Both sides have bad qualities so you just give up on all of it?”

 

“For some beings, yes,” Queenie said.  “For others, you simply try to work with what’s there.  In my case, that meant throwing help to the Resistance when I could but staying far clear of the Republic.”  She nodded to the door.  “And helping beings like Archan and his friends steer clear of them as well.”  She frowned.  “I think that there are a lot of potential allies out there for you, Commander, but I’ll tell you now, a lot of them are going to be scared that your plan is to reinstall the Republic when you’re through.”

 

“We haven’t thought that far ahead yet,” Rose said.

 

“Organa has,” Queenie said.

 

“But she’s not in charge anymore,” Amir said. 

 

“She’s not?”

 

“Handed things over to Poe Dameron,” Amir said.

 

“Hmmmmm,” Queenie said, suddenly thoughtful.  “That’s an interesting choice.”

 

“How so,” Rose asked.

 

“He’s got the pedigree.  Most beings know about his parents.  Plus, he’s made a name for himself in his own right.  But he’s not a career politician.  And he sure as hell ain’t royalty.”  She leaned back.  “No, that actually might work in your favor here.”

 

Amir sighed.  “You care to let us in on whatever is going through your head?  Frankly, I get the idea that we’re only getting about half of this conversation.”

 

Queenie laughed.  “Let’s just say, I’m not shocked that you reached out, and I was curious to see who the Resistance would send me and what their pitch was going to be.  Sending you two,” Queenie said, “was not what I expected, but…”

 

“You’re still going to turn us down,” Rose said.

 

“No,” Queenie said.  “It’s not me you have to convince, Commander.”  She shook her head and returned to her seat on the other side of the desk.  “I am a member of a… _guild_ of…concerned citizens.”

 

Amir raised an eyebrow at that.

 

“Fine, thieves, smugglers, cartels.”

 

Rose made a noise.

 

“There’ve been rumblings in the group about joining up with the Resistance, but there’s been a lot of fear, too.”

 

“Because they’re scared we’re trying to reinstall the Republic,” Amir asked.

 

“Yes,” Queenie said.  “But with Dameron running things, we can assume that might not be the case.  He didn’t exactly leave on the best of terms when he joined up with Organa.”

 

“Honestly,” Amir said, “I don’t get the sense that Dameron is thinking about what will replace the Order so much as defeating them and then seeing where the dust settles.”

 

“So, there might be a place for me and mine at the table,” Queenie asked.

 

“Yes,” Rose said, before Amir could.

 

Queenie lifted an eyebrow at the young woman.  “You sure?  I wouldn’t think you’d want _disreputable_ types like me in the thick of things.”

 

Rose leaned forward.  “I may be passionate about my beliefs, ma’am, but that doesn’t mean I’m not willing to listen.  And as someone who grew up under the Republic, who was abused under that system, I can sympathize with what you’re saying.”

 

Queenie smiled.  “I really like this one.”

 

Amir said, “So does that mean we have a deal?”

 

“It means I’ll take you to the next meeting of the syndicate.  You can take your case to them and see what they say.”

 

“But what about you,” Rose asked.

 

Queenie smiled.  “We’ll see,” she said.  She pushed herself up from her chair.  “Now, come on.  The meeting in a few days’ time at Junkfort Station.”

 

“Kriff,” Amir said.

 

“Neutral territory,” Queenie said.  “While we like to project an aura of collectivity, we don’t tend to trust each other.”

 

“Great,” Amir said, rolling his eyes.  “This mission just keeps getting better and better.”

 

**# # # #**

 

They’d been slowly making their way towards what Finn was convinced was a First Order training facility.  “This system meets all their requirements.  Out of the way, but not too far off any hyperspace lanes.  Sparsely populated,” he said, reading off his datapad.  “Never been that political.”

 

“Good place to hide,” Zeb added.

 

Finn took a deep breath.  “Then, this might be it.”  He set down the datapad.  “We’ll come in at the edge of the system and slowly work our way towards the most likely spots.”

 

Zeb nodded.  “I learned a few things back in the Rebellion.  I think I still remember how to sneak into enemy instillations.”

 

Finn wanted to smile, but he was nervous.  He sat down across from Zeb, absently playing with the ring that now hung around his neck.

 

Zeb looked up with an amused smile.  He set his bo-rifle on the table between them and started cleaning it.  “You figure out what that is yet?”

 

“It’s a washer.  Steel.  Not worth much.”

 

Zeb snorted at that.  “It’s a ring, kid.  We both know it.”

 

Finn looked down at it, worn smooth after years of…  _I wonder who it belonged to._

 

“How long have you and Dameron been dancing around each other?”

 

Finn looked up, still clutching the ring.  “We only met a few days before Starkiller.”

 

“Hmmmmm,” Zeb hummed.  “Love at first sight.”

 

“Who said anything about—”

 

Zeb looked pointedly at the ring and then up at Finn, raising an eyebrow.

 

“Well,” Finn stammered, “it’s not… I mean, Poe’s just a…”  He slumped back into his chair.  “What would you know about it?”

 

“Kal,” Zeb said, not taking his eyes off the bo-rifle.

 

“Who,” Finn asked.

 

Zeb stopped polishing the thing.  _Not like it really needs it._   He looked at Finn.  “Kal,” he said.  “That was my husband’s name.”  Zeb frowned and re-focused on his weapon.  “Died a few years ago.” 

 

“Kal,” Finn repeated, reverently.

 

“Alexsandr Kallus,” Zeb said.  “Agent Kallus of the Imperial Security Bureau.  Then, he switched sides and became Fulcrum.  Then…”  Zeb was lost for a moment before he seemed to remember Finn was there.  “Captain Kallus of the Rebel Alliance.”  He gave Finn a tiny smile.  “A defector, like you.”

 

_Traitor_ , a voice Finn couldn’t escape screamed in his head.  Finn’s hands clenched.  _No, a hero_ , he told himself.  Finn looked up at Zeb.  “Tell me about him.”

 

“Kal was a real bastard when we first met.”  Zeb chuckled.  “Was a real bastard most of the time after too, but…”

 

_But you couldn’t live without him_ , Finn thought as Zeb told him the story of a fateful night on the frozen moon of Bahryn…

 

**# # # #**

 

“How long were you together?”

 

_Not long enough._   “Nearly thirty years,” Zeb said.

 

Finn nodded, thinking that thirty years sounded both like an impossibly long time and way too short. 

 

“It wasn’t easy,” Zeb said.  “The past…it’s a hard thing to forget, and we’d both done things we regretted, but…”  Zeb looked up.  “After the fall of Lasan, I didn’t…”  Zeb sighed and started polishing the bo-rifle again.  “I found a family on the Ghost.  As much as…”  He shook his head.  “As much as Bridger got on my very last nerve and…”  He put down the rag.  “But there were things that happened that pulled us apart, and when that happened, I still had Kal, standing by my side.  It’s…”  Zeb shook his head.  _This kind of kriffing stuff, with the feelings, this is the kind of bantha fodder Kanan lived for._   Zeb chuckled, remembering.  He took a breath and faced Finn.  “It’s about finding someone who has your back, who has seen the good and the bad and is still willing to stand beside you.  It’s…”

 

“…about that being that makes it all a little easier.”

 

Zeb nodded.

 

Finn picked up the ring, studied it, and he hoped that somewhere on the other side of the galaxy, Poe knew.  _Please let this plan work, so I can go back and tell him._

 

Zeb studied the young man in front of him, feeling old, but also feeling so much more mellow than he had when he was younger.  He’d learned a long time ago that holding onto regret would do him no good, but watching Finn play with that damn ring made him wonder what it would’ve been like if he and Kal had figured things out even sooner.  If they could’ve had another few months, maybe even another year together— _what would that have been like?_

 

“Tell him as soon as you can,” Zeb said, hating how raw his voice sounded.

 

Finn didn’t trust himself to respond, so he nodded, still staring at that damn ring and hoping against hope that this mission would be a success.

 

 


	15. See the Mission Through

 

 

“General, we have a small ship just outside of atmo and—”  Koo stopped, concentrating on something as she pressed her headset closer to her ear.  She smiled.  “General, we have Leia Organa incoming.”

 

“What?”  Poe cocked his head and walked over.  “Open the comm,” he said.  Koo flipped a switch and nodded.  “Did we know you were coming?”

 

He could hear Leia’s laugh.  “Hello to you, too.  And no, General, you didn’t know.  I…”  Poe winced.  There was something in her silence he didn’t like.  “We’ll talk when I land,” she eventually said.

 

“Yes, we will,” Poe said, already jogging out of command.

 

**# # # #**

 

Poe stood on the tarmac, hoping that this visit meant good news.  The ramp lowered and soon, R2-D2 appeared.  Leia was behind the droid.  Poe’s eyes narrowed as she came down the ramp.  _She looks tired_.  He walked over and pulled Leia into a hug.  “Hey,” he said.  “You have news for us?”  _Why are you back?_

 

Leia squeezed her eyes shut and let Dameron hug her.  Finally, she said, “I missed you too, Poe.”

 

Poe laughed, stepping out of the hug.  “Come on.  You can tell me in command.  We have news.  Lots of news.”

 

Leia shook her head.  “First, let’s…”  She gestured to a path that led away from the base.  “Let’s take a walk.”

 

Poe swallowed and nodded, dreading what she had to say.

 

**# # # #**

 

They’d walked in silence for several minutes before Leia turned to him.  “I don’t know any way to do this other than being blunt,” she started.

 

“One of your best qualities.”

 

“Sometimes.”

 

Poe looked at her expectantly.

 

She stopped walking and turned to him.  “Poe, I’m dying.”

 

Poe blinked.  His first instinct was to tell her she was crazy, to shake his head and drag her to medical.

 

Leia reached over and took his hand.  “I’ve known for a while now.”

 

It sunk in, and Poe realized he’d known for a while now too.  “Since Crait,” he said.  She nodded.  “Which would explain why…”

 

“The plan was always for you to take over.  This, it just sped up the timeline a bit.”

 

Poe’s whole being felt heavy.  He looked around and spotted a rock.  He nodded to it.  “Can we?”

 

Leia nodded and walked over.

 

Poe asked, “But why come back?”

 

Leia looked out across the Jedha plains.  “I hadn’t planned to, but…”  She sighed.  “A lot of smugglers are joining up with Chewie and Lando, and I realized that there’s going to come a time very soon when I’ll be more of a distraction than a tool.  Besides,” she said, turning to Poe, “I wanted to be with family.”

 

“But Chewie and Lando…”

 

Leia squeezed Poe’s hand.  “They are family.  But you’re my family too.”  She shook her head.  “I had my goodbyes with Chewie and Lando, but…”  She was staring out into the dust, lost in memories.  She pulled closer to Poe.  Her voice was getting rough.  “There was something else I needed to tell you.”

 

“Me,” Poe whispered.

 

Leia nodded.  “Poe, you and I are a lot alike, and…”  She pressed her lips together.  “And one of the reasons I wanted you leading the Resistance was because I hoped that…well, that you would avoid some of my mistakes.”

 

Poe bristled next to her.  She could sense the conflict in him—both wanting to agree and disagree with her sentiment.  She chuckled.  “We really do have a screwed-up relationship, don’t we?”

 

Poe nodded.  “Yeah,” he said.  He took her hand, squeezing it.

 

“Poe, my whole life, I tended to have laser focus.  It was always the Rebellion.  Always go-go-go.  Almost everything else came second.  Because I _knew_ how important it was.  Not just for me, but for all those millions of beings who couldn’t fight back.  But,” she put her free hand over Poe’s hand and looked at him, “for a time there, I found a way to carve out a personal life and…and that was a very good thing.”

 

She turned, looking out across the plains.  “One of my biggest regrets is how things ended up with Luke and Han…and Ben,” she whispered.

 

“Leia,” Poe started.

 

She shook her head.  “It is what it is,” she said.  They both turned, watching the dust kick up over the pains.  Eventually, she asked, “Have you ever heard of Kanan Jarrus?”

 

“The Jedi?”

 

“Well, technically yes and no.  He gave that up for a time, but…yes, the Kanan Jarrus who fought in the Rebellion.”

 

“Mom and Dad mentioned him, but…”

 

“Kanan didn’t want to be a part of the Rebellion.  After the massacre of the Jedi, he wanted to get as far away from galactic politics as he could, but,” Leia took a deep breath.

 

“But?”

 

“He met someone.”

 

“Someone?”

 

“Hera Syndulla,” Leia said.

 

“General Syndulla,” Poe repeated.  “Great pilot.”

 

Leia laughed.  _Of course, that’s what he’d know_.  “Among other things,” she said.  “Well, Kanan followed her and ended up being a pivotal reason that the Rebellion survived.  One of many heroes who gave up their lives so that the rest of us could keep moving forward.”  Leia shook her head.  “But he was also a man.”  She looked at Poe.  “A man in love.  And from what my father told me, there were times when being a part of the fight took its toll on his relationship with Hera—just like it did with my father’s relationship with my mother—just like I’m sure it did with your parents and with any number of beings who were trying to juggle both the war and a normal life.”

 

Poe hated to think of his parents having problems, but it made sense.  _Mama in the air.  Papa on the ground._

“Anyway,” Leia said, “my point is that while the war took its toll on their relationship, I also think that their relationships made them better soldiers.”

 

“They had something to fight for,” Poe said.

 

“Yes,” Leia said, “but also, it settled into their hearts.”  She put her hand on Poe’s knee.  “Poe, you’re one of the most passionate people I know.  You have a big heart and…and I think that heart is going to lead the Resistance in new directions, _better_ directions.”

 

Poe started to protest, but she kept talking.  “But you’re keeping a part of yourself locked away, and it’s hurting you.”  She looked down.  “I think you’re following my example here, and, and…  You can’t be the best leader for this organization if you hold back.  I know that the Jedi thought that love was a distraction, but I actually think it helps you focus.  I…I…”  She shook her head.  “I _knew_ that, but…but I think that over the years, I let the war take over and…”  She sighed.  “We’re fighting to keep the galaxy safe and we’re fighting to protect families and children and all of those beings who can’t fight for themselves, but that doesn’t mean that we should give up our own hearts in the process.  Love…it…it keeps you tethered to something besides all of the fighting and destruction.  It gives you hope.”  She patted Poe’s knee.  “And I think you need that.”  She smiled.  “We all do.”

 

Poe licked his lips, taking in everything she was saying.

 

“Don’t hide behind the rank, Poe.”  She took his hand again and squeezed.  “Do better than I did.”  Poe scoffed at that.  “I’m serious.”

 

“I don’t think there is better than you.”

 

The sincerity of the statement took her breath away.  Leia let it settle into her heart before she rolled her eyes.  “I’m a being just like any other.”

 

“Not to most of us.  You’re…you’re…”

 

“ _Princess Leia_ ,” she said.  “Yes, I know, but…”  She sighed, closing her eyes.  “I’m also a woman, who is looking back on her life with a lot of regrets, and most of those have to do with the beings I loved.”  She held his hand even tighter.  “I’m passing on my wisdom here, Dameron.”

 

She could feel the slight shake in his hand.

 

“I’m not ready,” he whispered.

 

“For what?”

 

“To lose you.  To…”  He shrugged.

 

“You never are, but…”

 

Poe had tears in his eyes as he whispered, “Leia…”

 

“You can’t keep me from dying, Poe.” 

 

He nodded, wiping his eyes.  “This stupid, kriffing war,” he muttered.

 

“I’d still be dying, even if the First Order were gone.”

 

“Doesn’t make it any easier,” Poe said.

 

“No, it doesn’t,” Leia said.  “So do yourself a favor and make it a little easier.  Tell him.  See what he has to say.”  Leia reached up and put her hand on Poe’s cheek.   “Promise me, okay?  I want to know that I’m going to be leaving you in a good place.”

 

Poe put his hand over hers and nodded.  “I will,” he said.  “I promise.”

 

“Sooner rather than later, flyboy.”

 

He grinned at the endearment.  “Yes, ma’am.”

 

Leia looked back out over the plains.  “It’s going to be okay, Poe.  I promise.”

 

Poe nodded, wiping again at his eyes.

 

“No one is ever really gone,” Leia said.

 

Poe sighed, thinking about his mama, L’ulo, Tallie, Paige, all the others he’d been missing over the past few months.  “They live on with us and through us,” he whispered.

 

Leia turned and studied him, feeling calmer than she’d felt in a long time.  _He’s going to be okay._

She smiled and watched as the dust swirled up in the distance.  “Always.”

 

**# # # #**

 

Zeb and Finn were side by side on the top of a hill about a klick away from the facility.  It had taken them about two days to come in, land, and then trek across a strange forest of barbed trees to get to their current position.  For the past several hours, they’d been watching.

 

Zeb held the binoculars, watching a shift change.  “Four hours.  Right on the dot.”  He put the binoculars down.  “Looks to be older cadets and not regular troopers.”

 

Finn nodded, the beginnings of a plan percolating in his mind.  He looked over at Zeb.  The Lasat was frowning.  “What is it?”

 

Zeb shook his head.  “Does this feel too easy?”

 

“I mean, I don’t think it’s a trap, if that’s what you’re getting at.  We’ve been careful and—”

 

“No,” Zeb said.  “Not like that.”  He scowled and held his binoculars up again.  “It’s more like they’re cutting corners here.”  He put down the binoculars and turned to Finn.  “I mean, how many training facilities do you know of that are this short staffed?”

 

Finn pursed his lips together.  That was true.  The Order didn’t trust its cadets and usually kept a few squadrons around to make sure the younglings stayed in line.  He looked over at Zeb.  “What are you thinking?”

 

“Something’s not right.  With the Order, I mean.”

 

Finn hadn’t really ever given much thought to how the First Order was funded, but now, he stopped and considered just how hard Starkiller’s destruction might have hurt them.   _Not to mention the dreadnaught and all the ships Holdo took out_ , he thought.   _And now with Ren in charge…_   Finn looked at Zeb.  “Could the Order be running out of money?”

 

Zeb turned back to the base, examining it.  He then said, “For as much as they’ve been telling everyone that the Resistance is dead, they’ve taken some big losses lately.  And while destroying the Hosnian System was a good scare tactic, it probably eliminated some of their sorces of funding or it might’ve scared potential investors away.”

 

Finn’s eyes narrowed and he took the binoculars from Zeb.  He watched the cadets in the front yard going through their exercises.  After a few minutes, he put the binoculars down and rolled onto his back.

 

“What are you thinking,” Zeb asked. 

 

They had a good vantage on the main yard—and group after group had been cycling through in the last few hours.  By Finn’s estimate, this was a last-stage sort of facility.  The final bit of training before you were assigned rotations on a base or a ship and completed your competency exams.  “Looks like the youngest group is somewhere around fifteen or sixteen and the oldest bunch is around twenty?”

 

“Sounds about right,” Zeb said.  “So?”

 

“So,” Finn said.  He stared up into the dark purple sky.  “It’s just the two of us, and I know that Poe said we should call for backup if we needed it…”

 

“But?”

 

“But I think this will work better if we keep our numbers small.”

 

“Small?”

 

“I have a plan.”

 

“I’m not gonna like this, am I?”

 

“No,” Finn said, trying to keep his voice steady.  “I’m not sure I like it, but…but I think it might work.”

 

“ _Might_  work?”

 

“Yeah,” Finn said, opening his eyes and looking over at the Lasat.

 

“So what does this plan of yours entail?”

 

Finn let out a long breath.  “Me getting caught.”

 

**# # # #**

 

The transmission was scratchy, but it was undeniably Rey’s voice on the other end: “Hi, Poe, ummmmmm, General?”

 

Poe chuckled.  “ _Poe_ is fine, Rey.  How are you?”

 

“Good.”

 

“And the mission,” Poe asked.

 

“I’ve picked up some Force-sensitives.”  Rey bit her lip.  “And some others?”

 

“Others?”

 

“Ummmmm, well, it was sort of a package deal?”

 

Poe couldn’t help his smile.  “You’re picking up strays.”

 

“Yeah, something like that, but…”

 

“But?”

 

“Well, it turns out that,” Rey sighed, “they’re kids, Poe.”

 

“Kids?”

 

“Well, I guess, technically Dy isn’t.  He and I are the same age, and Teean is sixteen, so there’s that.  But…”

 

“But?”

 

“The others are nine and ten.”

 

“How many others are we talking about?”

 

“Three,” Rey said.

 

“Three kids, a sixteen-year old, and two twenty-year olds.”  Poe didn’t know if he wanted to smile or frown.    

 

“Yeah,” Rey said.  “And there’s more.”

 

“Of course, there is,” Poe said. 

 

“Teean and Temiri and I all felt something, so we went snooping and…”

 

“I’m not gonna like this, am I?”

 

“We found a prison, Poe.”

 

“Prison?”

 

“First Order detainment center.  It’s a work farm and…”  Poe could practically hear her forehead scrunch.  “I’m pretty sure there are some Resistance fighters here.”

 

“Kriff,” Poe said.

 

“I have a plan for an attack, but—”

 

“You are not taking kids into an Order detention center,” Poe barked.

 

“No, I’m not,” Rey said.  She rolled her eyes.  “That’s why I’m contacting you.”

 

“You want help.”

 

“Yes,” Rey said.

 

Poe closed his eyes.  They were gaining new personnel, but with Finn, Rose, and now Maz gone and the pilots back to running missions, things were stretched pretty thin.  “How many beings were you thinking?”

 

“How many can you spare?”

 

Poe let out a long breath.  “Let me talk to Kaydel, see who we have, and I’ll get back to you, okay?”

 

“Good,” Rey said.  She paused and then asked, “Is Leia there?”

 

Poe looked around command and spotted Leia watching the conversation intently.  “It just so happens she is.”  He turned to Koo.  “Can you patch this comm into the private room over there?”

 

Koo nodded.  Poe pointed to the room.  “Leia, you can talk to her in there.”

 

Leia nodded.

 

Poe said, “Stay safe, okay, Rey?”

 

“Will do.  Thanks, Poe.”

 

**# # # #**

 

Poe looked over to the room where Leia and Rey were talking.  He had a feeling that it was going to be a tough conversation.  He blinked and walked back to the center console.  “Kaydel?”

 

“Yeah?”

 

“Rey’s found a First Order prison, thinks there might be Resistance soldiers there, but she needs bodies to help her break them out.”

 

Kaydel gave a nod and started scrolling through her datapad. 

 

“Preferably beings with some experience.”

 

Kaydel rolled her eyes and kept scrolling.  These days, soldiers with experience were a rare commodity.  “Nodin and Cassian are our best options as far as the pilots go.  Unless you want to reassign Karé, Iolo, and Nien?”

 

“No,” Poe said.  “C’ai,” he then said, pressing his comm link.

 

“Yes, General?”

 

“Laying cover while ground troops infiltrate a prison.  Who’s the better bet, Cassian or Nodin?”

 

“Cassian,” C’ai said.  “Nodin is still learning his way around offensive maneuvers.  If you need transport, he’s your man, but—”

 

“Cassian for cover and Nodin for transport,” Poe said.  “Thanks.  I’ll get back to you with the particulars in a bit.”  He cut off the link and looked at Kaydel.  “What about ground forces?”

 

“There, we have a bit more wiggle room, but…”  She frowned.  “None of them have a lot of experience.”

 

Poe sighed.  _And we’re going to need someone with experience to lead this mission._

 

“Except,” Kaydel started.

 

“Except?”

 

“Your father.”

 

Poe closed his eyes.  _Kriffing, fucking hell._   He pressed his comm.  “Dameron,” he said.  “Can you come to command?”

 

“Right away, sir.”

 

Poe tried not to wince at his father calling him _sir_.  He looked over at Kaydel.  “Tell me who the others are.”

 

“Ro-Tahn, Jarik, and Iella.”

 

“Kriff,” Poe breathed out.  None of them had been with the Resistance much longer than Finn had, and none of them had his training or experience.  _There’s no way any of them could lead this mission._

_Fuck._

 

“Yeah,” Kaydel said.  “I mean, your father and Commander Tansirch are doing a great job with the training, but…”

 

“But this is a specialized kind of mission.”  _The kind Leia would’ve assigned to me, back in the day._

 

Kes jogged up to the console and immediately his brow creased.  “What is it?”

 

“Rey, our Jedi, she’s found a First Order prison, thinks some of ours may be inside.”

 

Kes nodded.  “And you need personnel to go back her up.”

 

“Precisely.  Led by someone with experience.”

 

Kes frowned, letting that sink in.  “That means me or Tansirch.”  He looked up at Poe.  “And we both know it should be me.”

 

Kes Dameron’s son wanted to argue that, but General Dameron knew he was right.  “I’m really kriffing tired of sending beings I love off into battle.”

 

Kes slapped Poe’s shoulder.  “Then you picked the wrong line of work, son.”

 

“Yeah,” Poe said.  He looked over at his dad.  “So?”

 

“So, I’ll talk things over with Tansirch and pick out four or five of our best and…we’ll be ready to go in the morning.”

 

Poe nodded grimly.  “Coordinate with C’ai.  I’m going to have Cassian fly cover.  Nodin will fly the transport.”

 

Kes nodded.  He reached back over and squeezed his son’s shoulder.  “It’s the right decision, Poe.”

 

“Doesn’t mean I have to like it.”

 

**# # # #**

 

Poe watched the troops load onto the transport, wondering now how Leia did it without it breaking her heart each and every time.  _Was it because she grew up with it?  Watched it happen all her life?_

_Is she just tougher than me?_

Kes walked over, staring into his son’s eyes, seeming to read the pain there.  He locked eyes with Poe.  “You are making the right decision, son.”

 

“I know,” Poe whispered.  “It’s just…”

 

Kes put a hand on Poe’s shoulder, leaning forward to keep the conversation between the two of them.  “I don’t know how many times I had to stand on a tarmac and watch your mama fly off, not knowing if I’d ever see her again.  Or hell, son, after you were born, leaving you there on Yavin, not knowing if…”  He squeezed Poe’s shoulder.  “We do it so that other families don’t have to go through this shit.”

 

“I know,” Poe said, feeling like a little kid again.  Hating that he sounded so damn petulant.  “I just…”  _We never have enough time together_.  He met his father’s eyes again.  “Thank you, Dad.”

 

Kes looked confused.

 

“Thank you for being so kriffing amazing and thank you for taking care of me and believing in me and,” Poe surged forward, pulling his dad into a tight hug.  “I love you.”

 

“I love you too.”  He leaned out of the hug with a smile.  He cupped Poe’s cheek.  “We’re gonna get your soldiers out of there, okay?”

 

Poe smiled, nodding.  “Good,” he said, hating the catch in his throat.

 

Kes stepped back and threw his son a salute.

 

Poe straightened and matched it. 

 

As Kes jogged up the ramp, Poe called, “Papa?  May the Force be with you.”

 

Kes turned around and smiled.  “Always.”

 

**# # # #**

 

“You sure about this, kid?”

 

“Hell no,” Finn said.  “But…”

 

“But it’s the best plan we’ve got?”

 

Finn nodded, giving Zeb a smile.  He started to remove the ring from around his neck.  “If anything—”

 

Zeb caught his hand.  “No.”  He pulled the chain back down around Finn’s neck.  “You keep that.”

 

Finn nodded, pressing the ring into his chest.

 

“And don’t look so grim.  I’ve got your back,” Zeb said.

 

“You better,” Finn said, walking off into the forest.

 

“I will,” Zeb whispered.

 

**# # # #**

 

“Poe,” Iolo said.  “General, you reading me?”

 

“Yeah, sorry, you’re cutting out a bit,” Poe said into the comm.  “What’s the problem?”

 

“We’re picking up a lot of strange chatter out here.  Seems to be centered around Mandalore.  Can you…”  Static frizzed over the comm and it cut out.

 

“Iolo?  Arana?”  Poe cursed under his breath.  “Koo, can you see if you can get him or Karé back?”  He turned.  “Kaydel, see if you can pick up anything near Mandalore.”

 

“Will do,” Kaydel said.  Less than a minute later, she shook her head, muttering, “Kriff.”

 

“What,” Poe said, crossing over towards her.

 

She pulled off her headset.  “The Order.  They’re attacking Mandalore.”

 

“Kriffing hell.  Get Maz on the line and see if she can get anyone over there and see if we can reach Sabine Wren or not.”

 

“Poe,” Koo barked.  “I’ve got Iolo back.”

 

“Iolo,” Poe said.  “The Order is hitting Mandalore.”

 

“Yeah, we just figured that out.  They’re jamming signals and,” there was the sounds of an explosion nearby.  “And I think Karé and I just became a part of this.”

 

“Take evasive maneuvers.  Try to get a handle on what’s going on, but then get out of there, okay?  You copy?”  Poe called out, “Iolo?”  He looked over to Koo, who shook her head.  “Keep trying.” He walked over to the center console.  “It looks like the Order is through playing games.”

 

“Do you think they’re trying to lure us out,” C’ai asked.

 

“That would be my guess,” Tansirch said.

 

“Mine too,” Poe said.  He then barked out, “I want all senior staff in command now.  I think we’ve just entered the next phase of the war.”

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next week...it's the final five chapters, and things are definitely heating up: Plans work. Plans don't quite work. Missions fail. Missions succeed. At least one character says, "I've got a bad feeling about this."
> 
> And I figure you guys will yell at me just a bit.


	16. Darkness is Coming

 

 

Nyss noticed the change in Snap the moment they were out of the air lock.  He was no longer the affable man Nyss had gotten to know over the past few months; Snap was a predator.  His shoulders were back.  His hand had drifted down next to his blaster.  His eyes were constantly moving, scanning, taking everything in.  He wasn’t missing a thing as they stalked through the corridors of Junkfort Station.

 

All sorts of disreputable types used the place—supposedly neutral ground—and there were stalls, cantinas, banks, all sorts of spaces where one could store or spend credits.  Nyss tried to keep his mouth shut and not do anything too stupid.  He knew that he wasn’t the smartest being in the ‘verse, and he still hadn’t figured out why Snap brought him instead of one of the others, but he wasn’t going to question it.  He was just going to do as Snap said and watch his back.

 

For his part, Snap was trying to assess as much as possible, including possible exit routes, as Trent led them to the syndicate’s meeting space.  The meeting wasn’t due to start for another hour, but Trent had insisted on being early, something that Snap didn’t mind.  He’d lived long enough that he knew the value in testing the temperature of a room.

 

He chanced a glance at Nyss, who’d gone a bit slack-jawed as they wound through the market stalls that lined the corridors.  “You okay, kid?”

 

Nyss’ jaw shut and he nodded.  “Yeah.”  He looked over at Snap, worry clear in his eyes.

 

Snap tried to give him a reassuring smile.  _I really hope this wasn’t a mistake._

 

Trent turned around and nodded to a set of dark doors in front of them.  “It’s through there.”

 

Snap took a deep breath and gave a single, solemn nod.  “Okay, then.”

 

**# # # #**

 

Rose crossed her arms in front of her chest as they waited for docking clearance.  Queenie had insisted they take one of her ships and that they leave BB-8 back on Nar Kreeta.  _This isn’t good._   She glared over at Amir, whose typical devil-may-care façade had slipped.  Rose’s leg started jiggling up and down.

 

Queenie gave a deep laugh as she looked at the two of them.  “You’re going to have to do better than that when you meet the syndicate.  They can smell fear.”

 

Amir lifted an eyebrow.

 

“Not literally,” Queenie said.

 

Rose rolled her eyes and pushed up from her seat.  “Could they just give us the clearance already?”

 

“Will you calm down,” Amir snapped.

 

“Will both of you calm down,” Queenie said.  She shook her head, all previous traces of mirth gone.  “Look, I get it.  You,” she said, looking to Amir, “are nervous because one of your family’s lackeys could be here spying.  And you,” she said, turning to Rose, “seem to have this very antiquated idea of how the galaxy should work.”

 

Rose harrumphed at that.

 

“But,” Queenie continued, “if you want the syndicate’s help, you’re both going to have to pretend to have some confidence.”  Rose opened her mouth and Queenie added, “And composure, because while you might not like doing business with us, I’ll remind you that the Resistance isn’t in a position to be picky.”

 

Rose closed her mouth and slumped into the nearest seat. 

 

“Hey,” Amir interjected.  “Lighten up on the kid.”

 

“I’m not a kid,” Rose snapped.

 

Amir held his hands up in surrender.  “Sorry.”

 

Queenie rolled her eyes.  A voice came over the comms, directing them to a landing bay.  “Will do,” Queenie responding, pressing buttons and steering the ship to the coordinates.  “Just,” she said over her shoulder, “try to remember that these beings can help.”  She then turned, locking her eyes on Rose.  “There are a lot of paths to making real change in the galaxy but precious few of them are as pristine as you might like.”

 

Rose crossed her arms, nodding.  At the end of the day, she knew help was help.  She just couldn’t shake the feeling that they were walking into a trap.

 

**# # # #**

 

While the overall plan was to get captured, the first part of Finn’s plan very much depended on him not getting caught.  Thankfully, he had two things going for him: he used to be a Stormtrooper and he was pretty damn good at sneaking into places.  Finn couldn’t help but smile as he managed to slip in through a loading dock.  _They really are shirking on security if it’s this easy_ , he thought as he jogged to hide behind some crates.

 

He watched the beings milling about—almost all cadets—until he had their patterns memorized.  Then, he quickly moved until he was in the base proper.

 

_Let’s take a look around this place_.

 

Finn found the laundry easily enough and he was happy to note that like most Order facilities, it seemed to be entirely populated by droids.  He scanned the area, trying to do the math on how many cadets would be housed in the facility and how much laundry they would produce.  Something didn’t add up.  _There aren’t enough clothes here._

 

Standard procedure was that a cadet or trooper would turn in soiled underthings every day for cleaning, but that didn’t look to be the case here.  _Not unless there are a lot fewer cadets than I thought_.

 

Over the next hour or so, Finn crept through the facility and discovered broken armor, shoddily repaired tech, outdated equipment.  It was all adding up.

 

_The Order is cutting corners._

 

He let out a long breath.

 

_Let’s hope that works in our favor._

 

He closed his eyes, pressed a quick kiss to Poe’s ring, and then decided to start phase two of his plan: the part where he let himself get caught.

 

**# # # #**

 

Rose looked over at Amir, and she had to hand it to him—he’d been a nervous wreck on the ship coming over, but now, he exuded grace and charm.  He was all smiles. 

 

“Let me do the talking,” he’d said as they’d walked into the station.  She’d nodded, grateful that he could at least pretend to be confident about this.

 

The place Queenie led them to was full of beings.  By Rose’s estimation, there had to be close to two hundred, seated in a large space, facing a stage where a group of about ten beings were seated at a long table.

 

Queenie pointed to a bench near the front of the crowd.  “I have a place on stage.”  She smiled at Amir.  “But don’t worry.  I won’t forget about you.”

 

As Queenie walked towards the long table, Rose looked around, trying to take in all the different beings.  Her breath caught about halfway around the space.  There, flanked by two human men, sat Snap Wexley.

 

Her eyes bored into him.  She was about to get up and run over to him when she felt Amir’s hand on her arm.  “What is it?”

 

“An old friend,” Rose said, nodding towards Snap.

 

Amir followed her eyeline, taking in a big bear of a man with a scraggly beard.  “Resistance?”

 

“Yeah,” Rose said.  “At least he used to be.”

 

Amir chewed on his lip.  “What’s he doing here?”

 

“I don’t know,” Rose said.  _Maybe it’s a sign?_

 

**# # # #**

 

Snap watched the beings that were seated at the table.  Trent had filled him in on some of them, especially those who had expressed an interest in Snap’s operation on Akiva.  An older human woman walked over to the table and sat down.  Snap leaned over to Trent.  “Who’s she?”

 

Trent looked at the table.  “Queenie,” he said.  “Definitely a good one to have on your side.  She runs things on Nar Kreeta.”

 

“I thought that was still Hutt Territory.”

 

“Oh, it is,” Trent said.  “But…”  He smiled, leaving the rest hanging.

 

Snapped hummed, watching the woman smile and greet the others up front.  He was about to ask Trent another question when something caught his eye.  He looked at the other end of room to a bench right up front and his whole body froze.  _Rose Tico._

 

He jerked his head around, studying the crowd.  _Does that mean that the others are here?_

 

_Please, Karé._

_Or Poe._

_Or…_

 

He couldn’t spot anyone.

 

“Boss,” Nyss whispered into his ear.  “What is it?”

 

He threw Nyss a tiny smile.  “Hope.”

 

**# # # #**

Maz woke up from a fitful sleep.  Things on Cerea had been going well enough.  They’d managed to cobble together a working base and each day, more and more beings were finding their way to them.  But on this particular night, for some reason…

 

Maz marched the halls.  _Something’s wrong._

_Something more than just Mandalore_.

 

She frowned as she turned into the mess.  It was empty.  She walked to the table nearest the middle, climbed on top of it and sat down, closing her eyes, trying to find her calm.

 

After a few minutes, she heaved out a sigh.  _Nothing certain_.  The Force just wouldn’t seem to settle.  “I’m getting too old for this.”  She pushed herself off the table.  _It could be nothing._

_And it could be…something._

 

She pounded on the door to Ipa’s room until she answered.  Ipa wiped the sleep from her eyes.  “Yes?”

 

“Get dressed, find Choor and Ar’ra and any others that are up.  Get on a ship and…”

 

“Maz, what’s wrong?”

 

Maz shook her head.  “I…I don’t know.  It may be nothing, but…just in case.”

 

Ipa had learned long ago to trust Maz’s intuition.  She nodded.   “Okay.  We’ll set a course for Takodana.”

 

Maz reached out and took Ipa’s hand.  “May the Force be with you.”

 

**# # # #**

If there was one thing Amir had developed over the years, it was an ear for double-speak and things-left-unsaid.  _And these moof-milkers are as bad as any politician I’ve ever seen._

 

So far, the group on stage had gone through the usual pleasantries—welcoming everyone and going over the general state of the galaxy—before delving into the question of the hour: what side they wanted to take in the war between the First Order and the Resistance.

 

Except they never mentioned either the Order or the Resistance outright.

 

To the uninitiated, it probably sounded as if they were squabbling over allowing in new members—because that is all they were talking about on the surface—but Amir understood the subtext.

 

To his reckoning, there were four broad groups represented on stage.  Three of the beings were firmly in the neutral camp—they wanted to stay out of the war and just keep doing what they were doing.  The smallest group, represented mainly by a Rodian, who kept fidgeting and making as if he were simply going to get up and run away, seemed to want to wait and see—pick the side that was winning a few months from now.

 

Amir tried not to show his amusement at that—trying to play it both ways almost never ended well for a being.  _I thought all smugglers knew that._

 

Surprisingly, the largest contingent seemed to be in support of joining up with the Resistance, or at the very least offering them tacit support.  Queenie, as well as a Twi’lek and two other humans, were passionately arguing this stance, and from what Amir could tell, large portions of the crowd agreed with them.

 

From what Amir could follow of the subtext, most of the gangs and smugglers understood that the Order was something fundamentally different than the Empire, and while the Empire might have let things slide, it didn’t look like the Order was as apt to pass a blind eye over the less-than-legal goings on in the galaxy.

 

There were also two Trandoshans sitting at the far end of the table on stage.  Amir was willing to bet most of his fortune that they supported the Order, and he was getting more and more antsy because neither of them were saying anything.  He kept waiting for them to jump in, but neither ever did.

 

His hand had long since gravitated towards his blaster and he found that as the meeting wore on, he never tore his eyes from the Trandoshans.

 

“What is it,” Rose whispered.

 

“I’ve got a bad feeling about this.”

 

“That makes two of us.”

 

**# # # #**

 

Snap didn’t recognize the guy sitting with Rose, but they were definitely together.  He figured the guy had to be a new member of the Resistance, but Snap couldn’t quite figure out what he and Rose were doing at the meeting.

 

The longer he sat, watching the strange debate on stage, the more he wondered why Trent’s friends had invited him.  Snap had narrowed down his mysterious benefactor to one of four beings—a Twi’lek and three humans, including the one Trent identified as Queenie.  They seemed to be the most Resistance-friendly of the bunch, so it made sense that one of them was the being who invited him here.

 

_But why?_

 

Snap spared another look over at the guy sitting with Rose.  Whoever he was, he was tense, and Snap couldn’t say that he blamed him.

 

He leaned over to Nyss, “I don’t think this is going the way our friends thought it was.”

 

Nyss nodded and whispered, “So what does that mean?”

 

“It means—”

 

There was a loud commotion on stage and Snap turned just in time to see the two Trandoshans stand up and start firing.

 

A second later, blasterfire erupted from all around them.  Snap grabbed Nyss and pulled him behind some cover, hoping that Rose and her friend were doing the same.  He looked over to tell Trent to hide, but he was too late.  “Kriff,” he breathed out, looking away from Trent’s lifeless form and reaching for his blaster.

 

Nyss looked terrified.  “Just stay close,” Snap said.  “We’ll get out of this.”

 

Nyss nodded, wincing as a new round of blasts flew past their heads.

 

**# # # #**

 

Rey frowned as she peered through the binoculars.  The operation was huge.  Hundreds of prisoners out working as far as the eye could see: picking and processing food stuffs.  _Feeding the Order_ , she thought ruefully.  She rolled over from her position on a small rise about a klick away from the outer perimeter.  _Slave labor._

 

And given what she’d seen over the last few days, they were torturing these beings as well.  It had taken all of her willpower not to just go running in, lightsaber in hand, and make the whole thing go away.  But that might get messy.

 

_No.  Wait for reinforcements._

 

She felt a tug at the edge of her senses.  _Teean._   She closed her eyes, following the tug.  “Speaking of which,” she whispered, smiling.  She carefully got up into a crouch and started back to the transport.

 

**# # # #**

 

Zeb hated the tight feeling in his chest.  “I thought we were finished with this blasted stuff,” he muttered, pacing a tight ring from his perch overlooking the facility.  “I thought that’s what it meant when we finally went home and started our new life.”  He kicked at some dirt.  “Karabast!”

 

He turned, looking at the facility.  Any moment now, there were going to be alarms, and if the kid played his cards right, a lot of beings running around.  _Please don’t shoot him on sight_ , Zeb prayed.

 

He could hear Kal’s voice in his head.  _Would you please learn to trust your friends?  He’ll be fine._

 

Zeb sneered and started his pacing again.  “And you should be here, you colossal pain in the…”  He could almost hear Kal laughing at him and telling him in that clipped accent of his that Zeb was just nervous.  “You’re damned right, I’m nervous.”

 

He growled and gripped his bo-rifle tighter.  _Come on.  Come on.  Come on._

 

The alarms sounded. 

 

Zeb got into position.  Theoretically, he was close enough to lay some fire if it came to that.  But Finn had told him to wait.  “I can’t believe I let him talk me into this,” he grumbled as he watched the facility erupt into chaos.

 

**# # # #**

 

Rey had to work hard to hide her smile.  Teean was standing in front of Arashell, Temiri, and Oniho, who were all peeking around him.  Dy had already walked forward to greet the Resistance soldiers coming off of the transport.  _My warrior and my peacemaker_ , she thought as she started forward.

 

“Rey,” asked an older man who reminded her of someone.

 

“Yes,” she said, holding out a hand.  “I’m Rey.”

 

“Kes.  Kes Dameron,” the man said with an easy smile.  His eyes crinkled, and she couldn’t believe she hadn’t made the connection instantly. 

 

Her smile grew.  “Hello.  I…I didn’t know that you were part of the Resistance.”

 

He laughed.  “Retired a few years after Poe was born, but,” he thrust his hands into his pockets, taking in the scenery.  “Figured they might need my help.”

 

A soldier came jogging up.  “Where do you want us, Sergeant?”

 

Kes turned.  “Just stay near the transport until Rey and I have figured things out.”

 

“Yes, sir,” the young man said.

 

Rey smiled.  “Sergeant?”

 

“Poe,” he said, smiling, “I mean, the General, never bothered to give me a promotion.”  He shrugged.  “But I don’t take it personally.”

 

Rey laughed.  She motioned over to the kids, noticing that Dy was already talking to the soldiers at their transport.  “This is Teean, Arashell, Temiri, and Oniho.”

 

Kes crouched down.  “Hello,” he said.  “Sergeant Dameron.  But you can call me Kes.”

 

A chorus of shy _hellos_ followed.

 

Kes laughed and turned to Teean.  “And you are?”

 

“Teean,” the teenager said, still a bit mistrustful.

 

Kes nodded.  “Do you mind,” he asked Rey, putting his hand on Teean’s shoulder.

 

“No,” she said, watching as Kes walked the young man over a bit away from the children.

 

When the two returned, Kes said, “I asked Teean to stay here to protect the children with one of our pilots, Nodin.  Just in case things go wrong, I want them to be able to get out of here quickly.”

 

Rey nodded.

 

“So,” Kes said, clapping his hands together.  “What do you know about this prison?”

 

**# # # #**

 

By Finn’s estimation, there were less than fifty adults in the entire facility.  Most of the facility’s operations fell to the cadets.  _Please say that works in my favor_ , he thought, as two of the older cadets escorted him over to the commandant.

 

The man sneered.  “FN-2187.”  He rolled his eyes.  “Did you miss the Order?”

 

Finn chuckled.  “No.  Figured some of your cadets might want to leave.  Thought I might help them.”

 

The commandant punched Finn in the stomach.  “Such arrogance from a lowly traitor.”  The man flicked through his datapad.  “I’m guessing that you and your little Resistance friends thought this would be a good way to get you back to central command.  Some new undercover mission, perhaps?”  The man shook his head.  “No, the orders came out just after Crait.  Capture and then live execution.”  The commandant smiled.  “We’re not going to give you a chance to escape again,” he said.  “Gather all troopers on the main grounds,” he yelled, “and set up a link to broadcast this live to the galaxy.”  He leaned in close to Finn, till they were practically nose to nose.  “I’m going to enjoy killing you in front of everyone.”

 

_That’s what I was hoping you’d say_ , Finn thought as the two troopers drug him to a holding cell.

 

**# # # #**

 

Command was a flurry of activity.  Poe stood in the center of it all, listening to reports from the prison and waiting, anxiously, for any word from Finn or Zeb. 

 

“We have chatter from Junkfort Station,” Zaré said.  “I can’t quite make it out, but I think there may have been an attack?”

 

“Who do we have in that sector,” Poe asked Tansirch, who started pushing buttons on his datapad.

 

“Fuck!”

 

Poe’s head snapped towards Kaydel.  “What?”

 

She was pale.  “The Order…they, they hit Cerea.”

 

_Maz._   Poe’s eyes closed.  “What?  But…”  _They didn’t contact us_.  “How bad?”

 

“It was a dreadnaught,” Kaydel said.  “It’s…it’s all gone,” she said.

 

Poe felt his chest seize for a moment.  _Kriff._   He then opened his eyes.  “Get in touch with Karé and Iolo and—”

 

Koo made a terrible noise.  Her hands flew to her mouth.  Both Poe and Kaydel ran over.

 

“Koo,” Kaydel said.  “What—”

 

“It’s all over the holonet.”

 

Poe looked at the images sprawling across the screen in front of them, announcing the capture of the traitor FN-2187.  He felt a familiar numbness settling over him, the same feeling he’d had in Ren’s interrogation chamber and later during the evac when Finn’s and Rose’s plan had gone to hell.

 

Poe swallowed hard, stumbling back and grasping for a console.  As his hands found one, he turned, wobbling.  He grabbed the edge of it, feeling his body sway.  From somewhere far away, as if he were slowly sinking under miles and miles of ocean, he could just make out Kaydel’s voice.  “General?  General?”

 

Instead of answering, one thought kept playing, over and over, in his head. 

 

_I should have told him._

 

**# # # #**

 

It hadn’t been very long since the blasterfire started, but the space was already getting a bit smoky, and Snap really didn’t like their position.  Plus, as he peered out from behind the table he and Nyss had used to take cover, he noticed that Rose and her friend were pinned down in an equally bad position, and her friend seemed to have crap aim.  Thankfully, the lady from the stage—Queenie—had made her way over, and she was a decent shot.

 

_What to do, Wexley?  What to do?_

 

Snap took a deep breath and turned to Nyss.  “Keep your head down and follow me.”  He closed his eyes, said a quick prayer, and then started running.  “Rose,” Snap screamed, running towards her.  He grabbed Nyss’ arm and pulled him in close.  They were going to come close enough to an exit that he could at least get the kid out.  “Get to the ship.  Block A.  Docking bay two-niner-five.”  He pushed Nyss towards the nearest door.  “Wait for me there.”  He laid cover as Nyss ran for the door.

 

As soon as Nyss was cleared, Snap sprinted towards Rose, trying to dodge blasts.  “Kriff,” he screamed as he ducked behind a chair.

 

“Snap,” Rose yelled, running over and dragging him behind cover.

 

“You okay,” Snap asked, sitting up.

 

Rose nodded.  “You?”

 

“Amir,” the other man said, holding out his hand.

 

“Snap Wexley,” Snap said. 

 

Amir nodded and turned back to the fray, firing into the amphitheater.  Snap frowned.  “You have any training?”

 

“He’s new,” Rose said.

 

“Obviously,” Snap said, taking out a sniper two rows away.

 

“They weren’t supposed to be shooting at us,” Amir said.

 

“We’re the Resistance,” Snap said.  “They’re always shooting at us.”

 

Queenie smiled at him.  “Well, this is a mess.”  She looked from Snap to Rose.  “Friend of yours?”  Rose nodded.  “Didn’t catch the name, sweetheart.”

 

“Snap Wexley,” he said, holding out his hand.

 

Queenie laughed.  “Of course, you are.  Any relation to Norra?”

 

“Yeah,” Snap said, a bit shocked.  “My mom.”

 

“Good woman.  Good pilot,” Queenie said.

 

“Who the hell are you,” Snap asked.

 

“Queenie,” she said.  “A friend of Rennal and Tico here.”

 

“Rennal?  As in…”  Snap looked to Rose.

 

“It’s a long story,” she said.

 

“Which we can tell him later,” Amir said.  “They’re getting closer,” he said with a nod towards a group of about four nasty-looking specimens slowly making their way forward.

 

“There’s a door over there,” Snap yelled, nodding to their right.

 

Queenie said, “Wexley and I are the better shots.  We can lay cover and then follow you—”

 

A blast landed right in front of the group.  Snap grabbed Rose, pushing her out of the way.  Amir jumped in front of Queenie.  A moment later a flash grenade went off.

 

Snap tugged at Rose, dragging her towards the door.

 

“No,” she yelled, reaching back for Amir.

 

Amir and Queenie were behind an overturned table.

 

“Go,” Amir yelled at Rose.

 

“What about you?”

 

“We’ll take my ship,” Queenie yelled back.  “You and Wexley get out of here.”

 

“We’re not leaving without you,” Rose said.

 

“And I’m telling you, Queenie and I will be fine, so go,” Amir said.  He looked at Queenie.  _Right?_

 

“Go,” Queenie roared.

 

Snap grabbed Rose’s shoulder.  “They’re right.”

 

Rose looked conflicted.

 

“Dammit, kid, get the hell out of here,” Queenie screamed.  “Go!”

 

Snap nodded, taking Rose’s arm and pulling her in front of him, to block her from the shooters.  Rose could feel the blasts whizzing past them, even with Amir and Queenie covering their exit.

 

“Where’s your ship,” Rose yelled, firing back at one of the Trandoshans.

 

“Block A.  Docking bay two-niner-five.”

 

“And where the hell is that?”

 

“Two corridors up, six to the right, another seven to the right,” Snap barked.  “Just keep up,” he said, pulling ahead of her once they were clear of the amphitheater.

 

The rest of the station was in chaos. 

 

_Please, Nyss, say you got to the dock okay._

 

Snap gripped Rose’s arm and started running, not bothering to look back.

 

“Hey,” Rose called after him.  “I’m a foot shorter than you,” she yelled.  “Little legs!  Little kriffing legs!”

 

“Sorry,” he said, keeping the same pace and pulling even harder.  Pretty soon, they were going to start locking ships down, and he needed to make sure they were clear before that happened.

 

Thankfully, it seemed that the syndicate’s fight was mainly centered on the meeting room and its closest environs, but in the pandemonium of the rest of the station, there was still the occasional blast to worry about.  “Who’s the guy?”

 

“Who?  Amir?”

 

“Yeah, since when do members of the Rennal family join up with the Resistance?”

 

“Since the Order killed his brother,” Rose shouted.  There were screams coming from behind them; she glanced back, hoping against hope that Amir and Queenie were already clear.

 

“And he just joined up?”

 

“Snap, we were down to thirty people after Crait.  At this point, we’re not being picky.”

 

“Fuck,” Snap said.  “I mean I heard the Order’s broadcasts, but—”

 

An explosion rocked the station. 

 

“Kriffing hell,” Rose screamed.

 

Snap pushed harder and Rose was pretty sure at this point, he was simply dragging her along.

 

They turned one last corner and Snap stopped so abruptly that Rose ran into him.  “What?”

 

“We’re here.”  _No sign of Nyss_.  “Fuck!”

 

“What,” Rose asked.

 

“Nyss,” Snap screamed.

 

“Yeah, boss,” came a voice from the corridor behind them.  Nyss stumbled forward, clutching a rag to his head.

 

“You okay?”

 

“Fell and banged it up.  I’m fine,” he said, stumbling forward.

 

“Rose,” Snap said, pushing in the security code for Trent’s ship.

 

Rose grabbed Nyss and helped him forward.  “Rose Tico,” she said.

 

“Nyss.”  He smiled.  “You with the Resistance?”

 

“Yeah,” Rose said.

 

“Cool.”

 

The door hissed open and Snap waved the two of them in.  “Come on.  Come on.”

 

“What’s the hurry, boss?”

 

“They’re going to start locking down ships is the problem.”  Snap jumped into the pilot’s seat.  “Rose, make sure everything’s ready to—”

 

“On it,” she said, dumping Nyss in a nearby seat.

 

Within a minute, Snap was pulling out of the dock with a relieved sigh.

 

As they got some distance on the station, they could see that massive chunks of it were gone.  Nyss whistled.  “Wow.”

 

“Yeah,” Snap said, watching other ships peeling off of it.  _Like rats off a sinking ship_.  He let out a breath.  “Okay, so next question is where to now?”  He looked to Rose.

 

“What about Amir and Queenie?”

 

“They’ll catch up,” Snap said, hoping it wasn’t a lie.

 

“We were on Nar Kreeta.  Beebee-Ate is still there.”

 

Snap smiled.  “Then, our first stop is Nar Kreeta.”

 

“And we should probably contact the General,” Rose said.

 

“General Organa’s okay?”

 

Rose smiled.  “ _Former_ General Organa is fine, but I was talking about Poe.”

 

“Poe?”

 

“General Dameron.”

 

“Kriff,” Snap said.

 

“He’s in charge now.”

 

Snap started laughing.  “Of course, he is.”  He looked over at Rose, his eyes suddenly wide and worried.  “And Karé?”

 

Rose smiled.  “She and Iolo caught up with us a while back.  They’re fine.”

 

Snap whooped in glee.  “Yeah!”

 

**# # # #**

 

There was a nasty scar on Queenie’s arm and she was pale.  Amir frowned.  _It wasn’t supposed to be like this._

 

“I know that look,” Queenie said, crouching down. 

 

“What look,” Amir said, peeking out.  There were still four beings between them and the nearest door.

 

There was another loud bang as the station shook again.  Amir winced.

 

“That look,” Queenie said.  “You’re scared.”

 

“Of course, I’m kriffing scared,” Amir said.  “I think that’s an appropriate emotion for the situation, actually.”

 

Queenie gave him a long, piercing look.  “Why in the hell does a Rennal join the kriffing Resistance,” she asked, taking aim at one of the men firing on them.

 

“My brother,” Amir started.

 

“The rest of your family is forgetting about him.”

 

“Well, I couldn’t,” Amir said, firing out.

 

“Thought it would be some adventure?  Or some romantic story of heroism where you tracked down the bastards who killed your brother?"

 

"Why are you pushing this?"  Another shot zoomed past them.  "Now?"

 

"I'm trying to get a read on you," Queenie said, popping up and taking out one of the men firing on them.

 

"I..."  Amir hated how badly he was shaking.  "I wanted to..."  He swallowed hard.  "I may not have personally sold to the Order, but I did nothing to stop it, and Alli, he was just trying to make the galaxy a better place.  I owe it to him," he said.  "I have to try to be a better being."

 

Queenie nodded, coughing a bit as smoke poured into the room.  A shot landed nearby and Amir made a noise.  He started shooting randomly into the haze.

 

"You’re a crap shot,” Queenie said.

 

“Well, I’ve only been with the Resistance about a month,” Amir said.  “We haven’t covered aim yet.  Or getting shot at!”  Amir ducked as another blast whizzed by.

  

Queenie gave him a sympathetic look, reaching over and squeezing his shoulder.  “We’re going to have to move soon,” she said.

 

“Yeah,” Amir said, hating how scared he sounded.

 

Queenie grabbed his arm, hard.  “Look at me,” she barked.  “Amir Rennal, look at me!”  He looked at her.  “We’re going to make it, okay?”

 

He nodded.

 

“No, say it.”

 

“We’re going to make it?”

 

“Say it like you mean it,” Queenie said.

 

“We’re going to make it,” Amir repeated.

 

“Good,” Queenie said.  "We're going to make it, and you're going to do Alli proud, okay?" 

 

"Yeah," Amir said, his voice still shaking.

 

She took a deep breath.  “On three, we’re going to jump up.  Just start running for the door.  Don’t look back.  Just keep your blaster up and keep firing, okay?”

 

“That doesn’t sound like a great plan,” Amir said.

 

“We don’t have time for great,” Queenie said.  “Okay?”

 

Amir nodded.

 

“Okay.  One.  Two.  Three.”

 

The two jumped up, firing and yelling as they ran for the door.

 

Amir heard Queenie grunt behind him, but he didn’t look back.  He just kept running, his eyes focused on the door.

 

They made it out of the space.  Queenie yelled, “To the right.  Two halls down and then left!”

 

Amir ran, his lungs hurting at the strain of it.  His eyes were watering.  The smoke was getting thicker.  “Where now?”

 

Queenie was panting.  “Three halls down and then right.”

 

He nodded and started running again.  _Please let us make it out of here.  Please, maker.  I don’t want to die here._

 

As he turned right, he saw the dock where Queenie’s ship was.  He pushed himself harder than he ever had in his life.  The whole station seemed to be wobbling now.  “We’re losing grav,” he yelled back.

 

“Yeah,” Queenie barked out.  Her voice sounded rough.  “Big blue button on the left of the door.  Code is seven-six-five-nine-alpha.”

 

Amir pressed it in and the door slid open.  He turned and his breath caught.

 

Queenie was clutching her stomach.  There was blood everywhere.

 

“Shit!  Queenie!”  He started towards her. 

 

“Get on the ship,” she yelled. 

 

He shook his head, making it to her and wrapping an arm around her.  “Come on.”  He drug her into the ship.  “Where’s your med kit?”

 

“No time,” she said, stumbling towards the cockpit.  “We have to get you out of here.”

 

“We can’t.  You’re—”

 

“Kid, I’m not going to make it, but I have to help you get her away from the station or you’re not going to make it either.”

 

Amir wanted to laugh, tell her to stop making bad jokes, but he knew she was telling him the truth.  He swallowed. “What do you need me to do?”

 

“Follow me,” she said. 

 

They made it to the cockpit and Queenie started pressing buttons.  “You know where you’re going?”

 

“Not back to Nar Kreeta?”

 

Queenie shook her head.  “Rose will get the droid, but it’s going to be dangerous there.  Especially for you.  There’s no way that you weren’t made back there.  Your family will be looking.”

 

“Kriff,” Amir said.  “Uhhhhh…”

 

“Resistance have a place you can go?”

 

“Yeah,” Amir said _.  I hope._

 

“As soon as we’re away from here,” she groaned, “we’re going to call them.”  She took a long, labored breath and winced.  “Tell them,” she took in another long breath, “tell them we’re near the lane to Jabiim.”  She clutched her stomach tighter as the ship pulled away from the dock.  Sweat was pouring down her face.

 

“Queenie,” Amir said, his voice shaking.

 

“Nothing to be done about it, Rennal.”  She looked over at him.  “Sorry.”

 

“Sorry?”

 

She nodded and reached around her neck, pulling off a chain.  There was a long pendant hanging at the end.  She held it out to him.  “Follow the instructions on the datachip inside.  There’s money and a cache of weapons. Do Alli proud.”

 

“Queenie, you don’t have to—”

 

“Amir, please, don’t.”

 

“Okay,” he said, slipping the necklace over his neck and then turning and facing the blackness of space.

 

Queenie started pushing buttons.  “They give you a contact code?”  Amir nodded.  “Good.  Once we’re near the lane, then we’ll tell your people where you are.”  She started coughing.

 

Amir reached over and grabbed Queenie’s hand.  “Thanks,” he breathed out.

 

She nodded.  “Any time.”

 

**# # # #**

 

Two Stormtroopers pulled him out of the cell and he was quickly escorted to the yard, where it looked like every cadet in the facility was lined up.   _This is it_ , Finn thought.  _Time to do or die._

 

Finn swallowed and just started talking.  “You don’t have to do this,” he said, struggling against the Stormtroopers as they drug him to the dais.  “They tell you that you’re nothing without the Order, that it knows best, but did you ever stop and consider how they never let you think for yourselves?  How they never let you have a choice?  Well, I made a choice.  The first time in my life I broke with the Order, I made a choice.  _My_ choice!  And it was that I wasn’t going to kill for them anymore.  They see us like robots, like machines that they can send out to do their dirty work, and they don’t care if we’re killed because they’ll just go kidnap some more kids.”  He looked around, desperately trying to meet the cadets' eyes through their helmets.  “Think of it.  How many times have you been told you’re expendable,” Finn yelled out.  “How many times have you been threatened or told you were worthless?”  He looked around, realizing that even with their helmets on, hiding their faces, some of them were hearing him.  “Not once with the Resistance have I been threatened like that.  Not once!  But here’s the thing.  I made the choice to join them.  _My_ choice.  And you know what?  I made the choice to come here too.  I formulated a plan and I executed it.  In fact, my commanding officer didn’t want me to risk my life, but…but…”  Finn forced himself to think of anything but Poe.  “But if I die today, I die knowing that after all those years the Order stole from me, in the end, it was _my_ choice.  _My_ life.  Not theirs.  Mine,” Finn yelled out.

 

They pushed him up the stairs and he kept yelling.  “My life,” he called out again.  “My choices!  And they can’t take that away.  They can call me a traitor and they can kill me, but they can’t take away my free will.  I’m going to die a free man.  How many of you can say that?”  They pushed Finn out onto the stage, and for the first time since he’d started talking, the reality of the situation hit him square in the chest.  _I’m probably going to die today._

_Fuck._

 

“There are terrible things in the galaxy, but there’s so many wonderful things out there too.  Friends and lovers and beings you can laugh with and who have your back because they’re your friends, not because they’re ordered to.  Beings who will take care of you.  Hell, I had a lightsaber wound up my back.  The Order would’ve left me to die, but the Resistance came and found me, took me back to their base and healed me.  Don’t you see!  Don’t you see that,” they forced him to his knees, “don’t you see that there is a better way?”  His voice was hoarse.  “Just…even if I die today, just remember that _you have a choice_!  You have the power to say _no more_!  You’re stronger than the First Order,” Finn yelled out.  “So much stronger!”

 

**# # # #**

 

“Freeze,” came a mechanical voice from just behind Zeb.

 

He closed his eyes and groaned.  “Karabast,” he muttered.

  

Another voice said, “Drop the blaster and roll over.  Slowly.”

 

Zeb clenched his jaw and complied.  There were two Stormtroopers standing at his feet, pointing their blasters at him.

 

The first turned to the second.  “What is that thing?”

 

The second shrugged.

 

“You’ve never heard of a Lasat,” Zeb asked.

 

“No,” the first one started.

 

“Good,” Zeb growled, his legs already kicking out and his claws ripping at their armor.  Before either of them could react, Zeb pivoted, wrenching them both off balance.  He jumped up and grabbed at both of them.

 

It took less than a minute before both troopers were unconscious on the ground.  Zeb then turned, horrified, as he heard the commandant’s voice.

 

**# # # #**

 

Across the galaxy, Poe stood watching the broadcast, tears streaming down his face, realizing that even in death, Finn was going to be the one that saved him, saved them all.  He shut his eyes, feeling his heart break as the commandant of the facility started talking.

 

“FN-2187, for your crimes against the Order, you are to be executed as an example.  This,” the commandant said, pointing to Finn, “this is what happens to those who would defy the Order.”  He nodded to the executioner trooper, who stepped forward with his axe.

 

Finn could hear it sizzling, could feel the air vibrate around it.  “My choice,” he screamed out.  He closed his eyes and thought of everyone he loved, profoundly grateful in these last few seconds that he’d been able to love and be loved by them all.

 

“Now,” the commandant ordered.

 

 


	17. Rise from the Ashes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please remember to be mindful of the tags...

 

 

The feed cut off. 

 

Poe blinked and then sucked in a huge breath.  It took him a moment to gather his wits.  “Kaydel?”

 

She was shaking her head.

 

“Where’s the feed,” he asked, hating how scared he sounded.  “Where’s the kriffing feed?”

 

“I…I don’t know.”  She was pressing buttons and frantically searching the screens around her. 

 

“Get it back,” Poe nearly screamed.  He was shaking so badly, he didn’t trust his legs to move.  He leaned against the console, trying not to sink to the ground, his mind screaming that he really did not want to see what was going to be on that feed.  Another part of him was saying that he had to—he had to know for sure.

 

“Poe,” Koo said, running up to him.  “We’ve got an incoming transmission—” For a moment Poe’s heart stopped.  “—from Rose.”

 

Poe nodded, licking his lips and wishing his mouth wasn’t so kriffing dry.  “Put it through.”

 

“Poe?”

 

“Rose, is that you?”

 

“Yeah, and…”

 

A new voice cut in: “Hey, Dameron, how’s it going?”

 

“Snap,” Poe asked, his eyes going wide.  “Is that you?”

 

“Yeah,” Snap said.  “Ran into Rose on Junkfort Station.”

 

“Kriffing hell,” Poe said.  He laughed.  _Thank the maker for small miracles_.  “It is really good to hear your voice, man.  And Karé is going to be so kriffing pissed she wasn’t here.”

 

“But she’s safe?”

 

“As safe as any of us can be,” Poe said.

 

Snap let out a sigh.

 

“Poe,” Rose cut in, “things went sideways here and we’re trying to figure out our next move.  We’re going to go get Bee, and—”

 

“You abandoned my droid?”

 

“Poe, Bee’s fine.  They’re guarding the ship back on Nar Kreeta,” Snap said.

 

“You left my droid on Nar Kreeta?”

 

“Yeah,” Rose said, ignoring his worry.  “Anyway, I think it might be smart if we found a place to set down and take stock.  Regroup.  Amir and I got separated, and if there’s a place nearby where we can—”

 

“Lothal,” Poe said automatically.  “I’ll have Connix send you the coordinates.  It’s close enough to some of the structures that you can scavenge but far enough away from the city you’ll be able to hide yourselves.”

 

“Thanks,” Rose said.  “And if you… _when_ you hear from Amir, send him our way.”

 

“Will do,” Poe said.

 

“And tell Karé I love her,” Snap added.

 

“Will do,” Poe said.

 

**# # # #**

 

Rey’s plan had been simple.  Cassian was going to fly over, hit a few key targets and create a distraction, while the rest of the group came in via the south fence—closest to the prisoners’ barracks—and start getting beings out of the prison.

 

The cover fire had worked and now Cassian was contending with a couple of TIEs off in the distance.  Alarms were blaring and Kes was slowly making his way forward with two of his soldiers while Rey led an assault on the warden’s office.  So far, most of the Stormtroopers were busy containing the fires from the explosions and dealing with Rey.

 

But Kes knew that wouldn’t last forever.

 

What he wasn’t expecting was a group of about seven prisoners, all armed with make-shift weapons, to come running, screaming at him.  One of Kes’ men threw up his arms as Kes shouted, “We’re with the Resistance.”

 

To a one, the prisoners froze.  Then, a small woman with long black hair emerged from the group.  “Who the hell are you?”

 

“Like I said,” Kes said, walking forward.  “We’re with the Resistance.”

 

Another explosion rang out.

 

“No, _I’m_ with the Resistance,” the woman said.

 

Kes raised his eyebrow.  “Then, you know my son, Poe.”

 

“Fuck,” she said, lowering her weapon and squinting.  “Sergeant Dameron?”

 

He chuckled.  “Call me Kes.  And you are?”

 

“Jessika Pava.”

 

Kes laughed.  “Well, it’s good to meet you, Pava.  What say we get these good beings out of here before any bucketheads show up?”

 

“Yes, sir,” Jess said with a gleam in her eye.

 

**# # # #**

 

Snap leaned back.  “I know Poe said Lothal, but I need to get back to Akiva.”

 

“Snap,” Rose started.

 

Snap shook his head.  “I’ve been building a cell there for months now and—”

 

“With all due respect, boss.  Ega, Allet, and some of the others have been talking and…”  Nyss sighed.  “Just call them.  They’ll tell you.”

 

Snap gave Nyss a strange look and punched in the code. 

 

A few moments later Ega picked up.  “Boss, is that you?”

 

“Hey, Ega!  Yeah, it’s me.  Things went…sideways,” Snap said, remembering Rose’s term.  “But the good news is, I managed to make contact with the Resistance and—”

 

“Good,” Ega said.  “Because we’ve been talking and, and…and we think you should meet back up with them.”

 

“Are you kicking me out?”

 

“Sort of?”  Ega sighed.  “Look, we know what we’re doing and, quite frankly, you’ve been itching to get back to your people for a while now.”

 

Allet’s voice cut in.  “If I have to hear you moan about Karé one more time…”

 

Ega laughed.  “What we’re saying is, we can handle training and recruiting here on Akiva.  You go meet up with your people and just keep us in the loop.  Okay?”

 

“Do I have a choice?”

 

“Not really, sir.”

 

“What about Nyss,” Snap asked.

 

“I’m coming with you,” Nyss said.  “Always did want to see the galaxy.”

 

Snap sighed, shaking his head.  “Okay, fine, but…keep this line open, okay?”

 

“Will do, boss.  Over and out.”

 

Snap leaned back.  “So, I guess we’re going to Lothal.”

 

**# # # #**

 

It only took a few minutes for everything to go to hell, and in that time, Kes had lost sight of Jessika.  Plus, there were a lot more Stormtroopers now, and the whole prison seemed to be on fire.  Still, Kes kept pushing forward, his troops and several prisoners right behind him, and he tried not to think about how long it had been since he’d seen real combat.  Kes grit his teeth and squinted as smoke filled more and more of the area.  Besides the explosions the Resistance had set, the prisoners were now setting fires as well.

 

Kes felt a blast come way too close and crouched down behind what had been a wall but was now a large pile of rubble.  “Rey,” he shouted into his comm.  “How’s it going?”

 

“We cut their communications and we think that most of the higher-level officers are already trying to evacuate.”

 

“We’re going to need to get these beings out of here before they hit atmo and can call in reinforcements.”

 

“Yeah,” Rey said.  “Let’s start falling back.”

 

Kes shouted to his troops.  “Fall back.  I want everyone at the evac site.”  He pressed his comm.  “We’re going to need more than your transport and mine.”

 

Jessika Pava came up through the smoke, landing next to Kes and splattering him with mud.  “I can help with that and,” she nodded behind her.  “And I’ve got two others who can fly.”

 

“Good,” Kes said.  “Rey,” he said into his comms.  “I’m going to help Jess and her friends get to some transports.  You get as many beings as you can to the evac point.”

 

“Will do,” Rey said. 

 

Kes turned to his soldiers.  “Get these prisoners to the evac zone.  I’ll meet you there.”  He nodded to Jess.  “Any idea where they keep their ships?”

 

Jess smiled.  “Follow me.”

 

 

**# # # #**

 

Thankfully, Jess had been paying attention during her time as a prisoner; she knew the shortest route to the hangar and got them there without any problems.  Just as they arrived, though, an order to evacuate started blaring all over the prison.  “They’re going to blow the place up,” Kes said, nudging Jess and her friends forward.

 

“I guess that means we need to get up in the air sooner rather than later.”  As they made their way into the hangar, Jess said, “So how did you guys know we were here?”

 

“Didn’t.  Rey, the Jedi?  She felt you or something, so Poe sent us to come help her.”

 

“Poe?”

 

Kes laughed.  “Yep.” 

 

Before Jess could ask more, they started taking fire.  “I guess they didn’t all get the evac order.”

 

Kes said, “You and yours get to those ships,” he pointed to their left, “while I lay cover.”

 

“Kes,” Jessika started.

 

“Just go,” Kes barked, already starting forward.

 

Jess and the others ran towards the ships.  “As soon as you can, just get in the air,” she yelled “and get to that evac point.”

 

**# # # #**

 

“This is Sergeant Amir Rennal, trying to contact the Resistance.”

 

“Good to hear from you, Amir,” Kaydel said.  “I have coordinates for you.”

 

“I’m supposed to tell you I’m on a lane headed towards Jabiim.”

 

“Perfect,” Kaydel said.  “When you get to Jabiim, program in these coordinates,” she said, transmitting the codes.  “Rose and Snap will meet you there.”

 

“Lothal?”

 

“Yeah,” Kaydel said.  “Good luck!”

 

“Yeah,” Amir said.  “Thanks.”  He leaned back into the seat with a heavy sigh, shuddering, and not daring to look back into the main cabin.

 

**# # # #**

 

Most of the Stormtroopers had scattered.  Kes turned around and spotted Jess, standing at the end of a ramp, waiting for him.  He groaned.  “I told you to go already, Pava!”

 

“You sound just like Poe!”

 

“More like he sounds just like me,” Kes winked at her.  And then, in one sickening moment, Kes saw it.  A Stormtrooper taking aim at her.  He ran as fast as he could, putting himself between her and the blast.

 

Jess saw it all happen in slow motion: Kes yelling and running.  The trooper taking aim.  Kes jumping in between her and the trooper and then Kes going down. 

 

Jess grabbed her blaster—relieved from another Stormtrooper soon after the prison break had started—and screamed, firing blast after blast until the trooper fell back, his armor smoking.  She dropped the blaster and for a moment she froze as she took in Kes, who was clutching his chest.  Blood was gurgling from his mouth.  “Kes,” she whimpered, shaking out of her daze and crashing into the ground next to him.  She grabbed his shoulders.  “Kes.”

 

His lips were moving but no sound was coming out.  Jess leaned forward.  “Kes,” she said, looking around desperately for help.  He somehow managed to pick up a ring he was wearing around his neck and press it into her hand.

 

She looked at the ring and then to the man.  “Kes?”  His eyes were shut.  He wasn’t breathing.

 

“Kes,” she whispered.

 

An explosion rocked the base. 

 

Klaxons were going off. Jess's whole body startled.  She blinked, realizing that she was in danger.  She pulled the chain holding the ring off Kes’s neck.  She got up, stumbling back towards the transport, tears streaking her eyes.  She ran up the ramp and spared one last look at the man who’d given his life to save hers.  She slammed the button for the ramp and ran to the cockpit.

 

**# # # #**

 

“Poe,” Koo yelled.  “We have Rey!”

 

“Put her through,” Poe said.  “Rey?”

 

“Poe?  Oh maker, Poe!  We…we, we attacked the prison and…well, wait just a moment…”  There was a strange noise on the other end, like beings moving about.  Poe shot a confused look to Kaydel, who shrugged.

 

“Hey!  I hear you’re in charge now.”

 

Poe nearly fell down.  “Testor,” he breathed out.

 

“In the flesh.”

 

“Oh, kriffing maker, Testor!”  He laughed.  “Jess, you’re…you’re…”

 

“Yeah,” Jess said.  “I’m glad to hear you’re okay too.”  Her voice got quiet.  “Knew you guys weren’t dead.”

 

“Maker, Jess,” Poe shook his head.  “This is…this…”  He laughed again.  “This is fucking fantastic, Jess.”

 

“Ummmm,” Jess’s voice went strange.  “I’m going to put Rey back on.”

 

“Jess?”

 

“Poe,” Rey asked.

 

“Yeah,” Poe said with a sigh.  Everything suddenly felt so much better.  He laughed.  “Jess is…”  _Kriffing hell.  First Snap and now Jess_.  He ran a hand through his hair, a single tear streaking down his cheek.  “Is she…”

 

“Tired,” Rey said.  “And…she’s been through a lot.”

 

“Yeah,” Poe said.  “Give her a hug from me.”

 

“Will do,” Rey said.

 

Poe chuckled again.  “I can’t believe you did it.  I can’t believe you kriffing did it.”

 

“Poe,” Rey started.

 

“Honestly, Rey, this is some of the best news we’ve had in—”

 

“Poe.”

 

The tone of her voice froze him.  _No._

_No, no, no, no, no.  Whatever you have to say, don’t say it._

_Please don’t say it._

 

“Poe,” Rey said, her voice tiny—so kriffing tiny that Poe forgot for an instant that she was a Jedi and imagined a frightened little girl on the other end of the comm.

 

“Rey, no,” he whispered.

 

“Kes,” she started.

 

Poe swallowed hard.  Everything stopped.

 

From somewhere far away, he could hear Rey’s voice, but he was gone, transported back to Yavin IV.

 

He was eight years old, standing at the back of the house, staring out.

 

It was an absolutely beautiful day.  The weather was perfect.  Flowers were in bloom and their scents floated on the breeze.  Birds dipped in and out of the jungle canopy, singing.  He stood there, his eyes tracing the leaves in the trees, the sway of the grasses.  A part of him knew it was beautiful, the kind of setting that beings travelled the galaxy to find, but he felt…

 

_Nothing._

 

After the tears and the screaming and the refusal to believe what his father had told him, there had been a strange hollow feeling.

 

That space in his heart where his mother had been was too large.  The hole was too big.  And instead of running from it, Poe had simply crawled inside and stopped feeling.  It was both terrifying and comforting, so he sunk into it, let it take him over.

 

He didn’t speak for four months after that perfect, horrible day.  At first, his father had given him space.  Then, he’d taken Poe to the best doctors on Yavin; he had begged; he had pleaded, his face streaked in tears.  He’d offered bribes to Poe, yelled.  Poor Kes had been at his wit’s end.

 

_Poor Kes._

From somewhere far away, Poe felt a spasm of something.

 

But then he was standing at the back of the house, staring out at that perfect day.

 

Feeling like it was mocking him.

 

And he remembered, there was Poe- _before_ and Poe- _after_. 

 

When he rejoined the world and started pretending that there wasn’t this huge, gaping hole in his chest, _after_ was still dull and grey.

 

_After_ was pain and longing and wishing and…  _Mama is dead._

 

_And now…_

 

Now, there was going to be a new _before_ and _after_.  And this _after_ was… 

 

_I can’t do this._

 

_I can’t do this._

_This can’t be the rest of my life._

_I can’t…_

_It’s not fair._

_Please._

_No._

 

He closed his eyes, images of Finn and Kes floating in front of him.  His body shuddered and he leaned forward, his hands holding the console in front of him so tight, they were turning white.  _Please don’t ask me to live like this_ , he begged the universe.

 

_Please…_

 

_Just let me go, too._

_I…I…_

_I can’t do this._

 

 


	18. Gather, Rebels

 

 

There was a small part of Finn’s brain that was watching everything happen as if he were a spectator, somewhere on the outside looking in, and that part still didn’t quite believe it.

 

The commandant had given the order and there had been no shot from Zeb.

 

_Fuck. I’m really going to die now._

 

Finn could hear the horrible charge coming off the axe.  He tensed, waiting for it to swing, but then, there was a single blast and the thud of a body falling back.  _Zeb!_   Finn opened his eyes to see a lone cadet, her gun still smoking where she stood.

 

Finn blinked.

 

That’s when all hell broke loose.

 

The cadet took off her helmet and started firing and others joined her.  Finn wanted to laugh, to cry, to jump up and down, but there were still plenty of beings on the Order’s side.  His instinct and training took over.   He pushed up and ran at the commandant, knocking the man off the dais.

 

There was a yell behind Finn and he spun to see a Stormtrooper aiming at him.  Finn blinked as the trooper went flying back.  Finn turned to see Zeb running into the fray, his bo-rifle taking out Stormtrooper after Stormtrooper.

 

A cadet rushed at him and Finn crouched, ready to meet the attack, but the cadet removed his helmet and nodded to Finn’s binders.  Finn held them out and the kid shot at them.  “Thanks,” Finn breathed before ducking a blast.  “Kriff,” he yelled.  “Need a gun.”  The kid shot at another trooper, hitting him in the back, and ran over, grabbing the trooper’s gun and holding it out for Finn.

 

“That’s two I owe you.”

 

The kid nodded and dashed off into the fight.

 

_Let’s do this_ , Finn thought with a smile.

 

**# # # #**

 

In that horrible moment when he’d realized that the two troopers had stopped him from saving Finn, Zeb had felt the kind of soul-crushing guilt he hadn’t felt since the fall of Lasan.  But when he saw the cadet take the shot and save Finn, he started laughing and running _.  The plan worked._

_The damn fool plan worked._

 

Zeb rushed into the fight.

 

Truth be told, Zeb had missed fighting.  Not that the last thirty years hadn’t been the best of his life, but he’d missed the excitement of battle, the singular focus of it.

 

He snarled as he rammed his bo-rifle into a Stormtrooper’s helmet, loving the crunching sound as it made contact.  He looked over and saw Finn, flanked by half a dozen cadets, slowly making their way forward.  Zeb had to admit, the kid was good.  Finn seemed to have a second sense when it came to fighting—he just knew where he needed to be to avoid being hit.  Zeb laughed to himself.  “If I didn’t know better,” he chuckled.  _Reminds me of Kanan_.

 

“Hey!  Zeb,” Finn yelled.  “We’re going to start working our way inside, try to get some sort of communication going with the Resistance.”

 

Zeb growled, pushing forward and noting the group of cadets who were now flanking him.  _My own personal guard_ , he thought with a smile.  “Me and mine will stay out here and finish up with the troopers.”

 

Finn nodded.  “Good luck!”

 

**# # # #**

 

Everyone in command was frozen in place.  Koo was crying, her headset askew.  Kaydel stared at Poe, who stood at the console, staring blankly ahead. 

 

No one made a move towards him, and Kaydel felt true panic for the first time in a long time.  An alarm went off and Koo pulled her headset back on, wiping her eyes.  “What,” she said.

 

After a moment, she yelled, “Connix!  Come here.”

 

Kaydel spared one look at Poe before running over.  She listened to the message on the comm and then sent out a quick prayer of thanks.  “Nien,” she yelled out.  “Get in the air now.  We’ll have coordinates by the time you break atmo.”

 

The Sullustan ran out of the room.

 

Kaydel turned and jogged over to Poe.  She took a deep breath.  “Poe?”

 

He didn’t acknowledge her; she wasn’t even sure he knew where he was.  She reached out slowly.  “Poe?”  She raised her voice.  “Poe?”  She grabbed his shoulder and shook it.

 

It was this strange moment of clarity, and it reminded him of how it had been in the X-Wing—all at once, the million little things would slot into place, and it was all still overwhelming and terrifying and draining, but there was something else, something more important that had to be done. 

 

Poe wondered if this was what it was like when you became a parent, when you had to set aside the voices screaming in your head because there was a child who needed you more.  _And like it or not, the Resistance is my child now_ , he thought.

 

He immediately groaned.  _Your analogies suck, Dameron._

 

He took a deep breath, pushing past his grief and his guilt and all the other things that had been weighing on him.  _After_ , he promised himself—and he genuinely hoped he would be able to get back to his feelings, face them, and deal with them later, but right now, he had to lead.  _I have to do this._

_Dad would want me to do this._

Poe blinked, coming back to the world.  His voice was rough, as he said, “Connix, I…” 

 

“Poe, we got a transmission from the First Order facility.”

 

Poe winced, squeezing his eyes shut.  _I can do this._

 

“Finn’s plan worked.  He and Zeb and a bunch of baby Stormtroopers are in the middle of a rebellion.”

 

Poe turned his head, his eyes red and watery.  “What?” 

 

Kaydel smiled, tears streaming down her cheeks.  “Finn’s alive.”

 

Poe let out an undignified hiccup—somewhere between a cry and a laugh.  “He’s…”

 

“He’s alive, Poe.”

 

Poe closed his eyes and sucked in one breath and then another.  He nodded, wiping at his eyes.  He asked, “Do they need help?” 

 

“I’ve got Nien in the air already,” Kaydel said.

 

“Contact Rey.  See if she can spare someone—Cassian?”

 

“On it,” said Koo.

 

Poe’s whole body was shaking.  Kaydel gave him a concerned look before he waved her off.  “Okay, let’s do this,” he said.  “What’s the latest on our beings on Lothal?”

 

**# # # #**

 

Rose, Snap, and Nyss landed at the coordinates Poe had provided.  Rey and the group from the prison were already there, scurrying around, setting up a temporary base camp.

 

Rey looked to be in charge, so Rose jogged over.  “You okay?”

 

Rey smiled as she saw the other woman.  “Yes.  You?”

 

Rose nodded.

 

“What were you doing out here?”

 

Rose sighed.  “Amir and I were…you don’t know Amir—”

 

“That’s not Amir,” Rey asked, pointing to Snap. 

 

“No, that’s Snap Wexley.  He’s…He was out on a mission during the evac.  We met back up with him on Junkfort Station and…”  Rose sighed.  “Amir and I were on a mission to try to get some new allies and…”  Rose shrugged.

 

“Everything went to hell?”

 

Rose nodded.  “I’m just glad to see some friendly faces.”

 

Rey wrapped an arm around her and gave her a hug.  “Me too.”  She sighed, looking out at all of the beings milling about.  _What in the kriff are we doing here?_   “How are things on Jedha?”

 

“Good,” Rose said, wondering what Kaydel and Koo were up to.

 

“And Poe?”

 

Rose shrugged.  “He gave Finn his mother’s wedding ring.”

 

Rey laughed.  “What did Finn say?”

 

“I don’t know if he knew or not?”

 

Rey's eyes were suddenly sharp.  “Why wouldn’t he know?”

 

“It was right before he left on his mission.”

 

“Mission?”

 

“To infiltrate a First Order training facility.”

 

“What,” Rey yelled.  “Why in the…why would Poe let him do that?  Doesn’t he know that—”

 

“Rey,” Rose said, putting a hand on the other woman’s arm.  “Reach out.”

 

“What?”

 

“Finn is fine.”  She smiled at Rey.  “I may not be a Jedi, but I’m getting better at this whole _reading-the-Force_ stuff.  Especially with beings I care about.”

 

Rey smiled.  She closed her eyes and thought about Finn.  She could sense his life force, humming somewhere out in the galaxy.

 

“See,” Rose said.

 

Rey laughed.  “When things settle down a bit, you should join me and the boys for some training.”

 

Rose looked around at all of the beings wandering their camp and raised an eyebrow.  “So, in like two or three years?”

 

“Exactly!”

 

**# # # #**

 

Snap laughed as he spotted Jess amongst the crowd.  “Testor,” he yelled, jogging towards her.

 

Jess stood, still a bit wobbly.

 

Snap stopped short, suddenly unsure.

 

“Will you just hug me already, you bit idiot,” Jess said.

 

Snap laughed and pulled her up into a big hug.  “It’s so good to see you, Pava,” he whispered.

 

“You too,” she said.  She closed her eyes and squeezed him back.

 

As he set her down, he looked her over.   “You look like shit.”

 

“I feel like shit,” Jess said.

 

Snap’s eyes were teary.

 

Jess rolled hers.  “Please!”  She sat back down, patting the rock next to her.  As Snap sat down, she asked, “Okay, so I was in prison all this time.  Where were you?”

 

“Akiva,” Snap said.

 

“I get stuck in a work camp and you get to go back home?  How in the kriff is that fair?” 

 

Snap shook his head, gently bumping her shoulder with his own.  “Looks like we have a fairly big contingency from the prison here.”

 

Jess nodded.  “Rey and her group came and got us.”  She sighed, looking down.  “Poe’s dad was with them, but…”  She shook her head, her eyes filling with tears.

 

“Kriff,” Snap whispered.  He closed his eyes, saying a quick prayer for Poe’s dad.  He wrapped his arm around Jess.  “I’m sorry.”

 

“Yeah,” Jess said, wiping her eyes.  “He was just like Poe,” she whispered.

 

“So, self-sacrificing and nice and amazing and…”  He swallowed hard.

 

Jess nodded, making a strange noise before blowing her nose into her sleeve.  “Stupid Dameron men.”

 

Snap hugged her tighter.  “Uh, you talked to any of the rest of them yet?  Poe?  Karé?  Iolo?”

 

Jess shook her head.  “Not really, no.  Just Poe for about three seconds.”  She gave Snap a weak smile.  “Can you believe that moof-milker is in charge now?”

 

“No,” Snap said with a chuckle.  “But honestly, I can’t believe we’re all still here.”  He sighed.  “After that message from Crait…”

 

“Crait?”

 

“Oh kriff!”  Snap licked his lips.  “That’s right.  Prison.”  He shook his head.  “From what I’ve been able to piece together,” Snap said, “the Order attacked during the evac from D’Qar and—”

 

“And it sucked,” Rose said, walking over.  “We lost the bomber fleet and—”

 

“Fuck,” Snap said.  “Paige?” 

 

Rose shook her head.

 

He reached over, pulling Rose into a hug.

 

Rose nodded, bowing her head for a moment and wiping away a stray tear.  She took a shaky breath.  “But then, we jumped to hyperspace and, and, and they were able to track us.”

 

“Kriff,” Jess said.  “That’s…that’s bad.”

 

“Tell me about it.”

 

“So, basically, they’re chasing us and we’re running out of fuel.  Finn and Poe and I—”

 

“Finn woke up,” Jess asked.

 

“Yeah,” Rose said, smiling.  “He woke up.  Right in the middle of the evac.  And he and Poe and I came up with this plan to disable their tracking device, but…that didn’t work, and there was this other plan but…but it fell apart too, and…”  She shook her head.  Her voice wobbled as she said, “A lot of beings died.”  Rose pressed her lips together for a moment _.  I will not cry._   “What was left of us ended up on Crait.”  She looked up at Snap and Jess.  “We all would’ve died if Luke Skywalker and Rey hadn’t have shown up.”

 

“Wow,” Jess said, looking over at the Jedi.  She shook her head.  “I still can’t…”

 

“I know,” Snap said.

 

“But,” Rose said, “we got off Crait.  And the General handed things over to Poe and,” she shrugged, “I’m a Commander now.”

 

Snap laughed, standing and throwing her a sloppy salute.  “Ma’am.”

 

She swatted at his arm.  “Oh, please.  I’m sure if I’m a Commander, then at this point, you’re at least a Colonel.”

 

“Well, if Dameron’s a kriffing General, I’d hope so,” Jess muttered.

 

Snap hugged her.  “It looks to me like if we end up here for the long-haul, we’re probably going to have to come up with our own command structure.”

 

Rose nodded, looking around.  “It’s actually more bodies than we had when we landed on Jedha.”

 

“Jedha,” Snap asked.

 

“The Resistance is on kriffing Jedha,” Jess asked.  “Way to be dramatic, Poe!”  She chuckled.  “I’m surprised he didn’t choose kriffing Hoth or Tatooine or something.”

 

Rose smiled.

 

Snap squinted, looking off into the distance.  “There’s a shuttle coming in,” he said, frowning.

 

Jess squinted, watching it bump along its path.  “Whoever it is, is a shit pilot.”

 

“And then some,” Snap said.

 

As the ship got closer, Rose smiled.  “It’s Queenie and Amir,” she said.  “I recognize the ship.”

 

Rey came running towards them.  “We’ve got an Amir Rennal coming in, says Poe sent him.”

 

“He did,” Rose said.  “He’s part of the Resistance.” 

 

**# # # #**

 

The ramp lowered and as soon as Amir appeared at the top, Rose smiled.  “It’s good to see—”  He was covered in blood.  “Snap,” Rose screamed.  “We need a med kit!”

 

Amir shook his head, starting down the ramp.  “Not me,” he said.  He glanced back into the ship.  “Queenie.”

 

“Crap,” Rose said, starting up the ramp.

 

Amir grabbed her arm, tugging her back.  “No.”

 

“Amir, let me go so I can—”

 

“Rose,” he said, his voice louder.  “No.”  He shook his head, scrubbing his hands over his face.  “She’s…she…”  He shook his head, tears falling from his eyes.

 

Rey and Snap came running over.  Snap took one look at Amir and grabbed him, putting his arm around the other man’s shoulders.  “Come on,” he said.  “Let’s take a look at you over there.”  He looked towards their little camp.  “Nyss, get something for this guy to eat and drink.”

 

“Not hungry,” Amir said, sucking in a quick breath.  _Never going to be hungry again_.  He looked back at the ship, his eyes watery.  “She…”  He shook his head.  “She…”

 

“It’s okay,” Snap said, looking over his shoulder at Rey and Rose.  He held Amir tightly, navigating him towards a cluster of rocks.  “Come on, let’s sit you down,” he said in soothing tones.  _What in the kriff did you see?_

 

**# # # #**

 

The two women slowly went up the ramp. 

 

Inside, they saw Queenie.  She was stretched out on one of the built-in couches.  She was pale; her eyes were closed, and her mid-section was covered by a blanket.

 

Rey tentatively reached over and pulled it off.  Queenie’s stomach was covered in blood.  Rey stepped back and hissed as if she’d been burnt.

 

Rose blinked, hard.  “Is she…”

 

Rey nodded.  “She’s gone.”  She took Rose’s hand.  “Has been for some time.”

 

Rose fought back her tears. “She was trying to protect us.”

 

Rey could feel the sheer anguish pouring off of Rose—it was like a terrible scream that just wouldn’t stop.  She grabbed the other woman and pulled her into the cockpit.  “Rose,” she said, trying to sound calm.

 

Rose was shaking her head.  “She was just trying to—”  She swallowed hard, rubbing her hands over her eyes, trying to wipe away her tears.

 

Rey didn’t even need to prod to feel it all—Rose’s sister, the situation with Finn, her conflicted feelings about Queenie and Amir, DJ’s betrayal, being overwhelmed by her new rank, nearly being executed by the First Order, nearly dying on Crait—it was all swimming around in Rose’s head and Rose was drowning in it.  “I need you to breathe,” Rey said quietly.  “Breathe and try to focus on my voice.”

 

Rose was still shaking her head.  “But,” she said.  She glanced back at the main cabin.  “She was…”  Rose’s whole body shook as she sobbed.

 

Rey pulled her forward, holding her.  “I know,” she whispered.  Tears prickled in her eyes.

 

“I miss her,” Rose whispered.  “I miss her so much.”

 

It took Rey a moment to realize that Rose didn’t mean Queenie.  “I know,” she repeated.  She pulled Rose closer, patting her back and hating the Order with a firey passion.

 

**# # # #**

 

Finn looked around.  To his count, there were about two hundred or so cadets standing out in the main yard, waiting for some sort of word from him or Zeb.  All of them had their helmets off and all of them looked sweaty and tired.  But, Finn noticed with both pride and alarm, they were all standing stiff, at attention, waiting for his orders.

 

“At ease,” he said, hating how tired he sounded.  “For those of you who don’t know, my name is Finn.”  There were murmurs at that.  Finn smiled.  “And I’m hoping that over the next several days, we can get each of you situated with a name of your very own.  You’ll get to pick it, of course, but Zeb and I,” he nodded to the Lasat, “will be more than happy to help.” 

 

Finn took a deep breath.  “My guess is that the Order is going to send reinforcements to try and contain or destroy us.  So what I’m going to need you to do now is to organize yourselves.  Those of you who are good at communications, I’m going to want you on the comms, helping me and Zeb talk to our soldiers.  We have a few X-Wings and a transport coming to help.  With any luck, they should just beat the Order here.  And if any of you have any ideas about the best way to defend this place, I’d really like to hear it.” 

 

There were more murmurs, and finally, one of the older cadets—a pale human with rust-colored hair stepped forward.  Finn instantly recognized her as the one who fired the first shot.  “Sir,” she said.  “Are you saying you want our opinions?”

 

Finn nodded.  “Yes…”  He waited for her designation.

 

“LM-4129.”

 

“You have a nickname, LM-4129?”

 

“Lem,” she said.

 

“Lem, that is exactly what I’m saying.  You all risked your lives to help me and Zeb, and our fight isn’t over.  I’m not going to ask you to keep on risking your lives without giving you a say in how you risk them.”

 

Lem looked ready to cry.  “Yes, sir.  Thank you, sir.”

 

Finn gave her a gentle smile.  “And what say, for now at least, we stop calling me _sir_ and just call me Finn, okay?”

 

Lem nodded.  “Yes, Finn.”

 

Zeb said, “Okay, then, what do you cadets think we should do?”

 

**# # # #**

 

“Colonel,” Zaré said, her eyes wide as she pressed her headset to her ears, as if she couldn’t believe what she was hearing.  “Mandalore has fallen.”

 

“What,” Kaydel asked.

 

Zaré nodded, big fat tears falling down her cheeks.  “We don’t have word yet from—”

 

“I’ve got something,” Koo cut in.  She smiled.  “Karé and Iolo managed to find Sabine Wren and they all made it out.  They’re going to re-group on Bandomeer.”  She listened for another moment.  “Awaiting our instructions.” 

 

“We’ve got Ipa and some of the others from Maz’s cell,” Zaré said.  “They made it out.”

 

There was a cheer in command.

 

“Maz,” someone asked.

 

Zaré shook her head. 

 

Poe’s hands clenched.  _Fuck._ He took a deep breath.  “Tell Ipa and the others to meet up with Sabine.  Tell them all to re-group, and we’ll figure out what the Order’s presence is around Mandalore,” Poe said.  “We’ll be in touch soon.”

 

“Yes, General.”

 

Poe looked around the room.  Things were speeding up again—and the last time that had happened, they’d nearly been wiped out.

 

_But this time it’s different_.  He sucked in a deep breath.  _It has to be._  

 

_It will be._

 

Poe knew what he needed to do.  “Koo,” he said.  “Can you open a secure link that will broadcast to our allies as well as to the relay stations you and Rose set up?”

 

“Um, yeah,” Koo said.  “Just give me a minute.”  She turned back to her station, furiously pressing buttons and twisting dials.  “You’re good to go, General.”

 

Poe licked his lips.  _I can do this._

 

“Hello.  This is General Poe Dameron of the Resistance.  By now, you’ve no doubt heard about the attacks on Yavin IV, Chandrila, Bespin, and Endor, as well as the latest attack on Mandalore.  The Order claims that it’s trying to bring discipline to a lawless galaxy, but in reality, they are simply in the business of killing.  First, it was the Hosnian System, then it was D’Qar and Crait.  Now, it is any system with ties to the Rebellion or that dares defy them.  Soon, it will simply be any system that shows up in their cross-hairs.”

 

He took a deep breath.  “And I know that it can seem hopeless.  Like it might be easier to just sit back and let the Order take what it wants.  Maybe you think that their technology and their numbers are insurmountable.  Maybe you think you’re all alone out there.”  He paused.  “But you’re not.

 

“You have us.  You have the Resistance.”  Poe looked around command, at all the beings who were giving their lives for this cause, and he couldn’t help but smile.  “They may have told you we’re dead, but we’re not.  And we’re here for you.  We’re here to help.”

 

Poe’s voice was growing stronger.  “Way back, when the Rebellion picked a symbol—some sign to wave in front of the Empire to tell those bastards we weren’t going to back down—the rebels chose a starbird.  And I think that’s fitting.  All throughout the galaxy, there are stories of a bird.  A bird born from the heart of a super nova.  A bird that cannot die.  A bird that will rise from the ashes of its own destruction in times of need.

 

“That bird is hope,” Poe said.

 

“It is the very symbol of rebellion—a force that refuses to die.”  Poe said, “That’s why, when the Resistance was born, Leia Organa once again turned to the image of the starbird.”  Poe let out a small sigh. “And you may be asking yourself, what good are symbols at a time like this? What are we supposed to do in those times when everything is reduced to ash?”  Poe looked down, thinking about his Dad and all the friends and comrades he’d lost in the last few years. “What do you do when everything and everyone you love is torn from you?”

 

Poe licked his lips, his voice tight.  “You fight,” he said.

 

“You fight because the starbird isn’t just a symbol; it’s a lesson about what to do in the darkest of times.  You see, the starbird isn’t simply how the Resistance sees itself—although I’ll tell you right now, that we will keep rising from the ashes again and again until this galaxy is free.  No,” Poe said, “the starbird is all of you. The ones who’ve been kicked around, harassed, tortured, harmed. All of the beings who are scared and alone. We’re all starbirds.

 

“And the Order may think they can kill us, that they can squeeze us until there is nothing left, but I’m here to remind you that we’re too strong for that.”

 

Poe took a deep breath.  “I just wanted to remind you of that, starbirds.  I wanted to remind you that you can rise from the ashes and fight back.  That you have the power to turn things around. 

 

“This is General Poe Dameron of the Resistance, and we ain’t going anywhere.  The Order wants a fight? Well, we’re going to keep fighting and fighting and rising from the ashes again and again until every single one of you is free.  That is my promise and my vow.”

 

He looked around the room and smiled.  “May the Force be with you, starbirds.”

 

A cheer went up through command.

 

**# # # #**

 

Leia’s breaths were coming in shorter and shorter bursts.  She smiled as she heard Poe’s voice echo through the base, took comfort in the timbre of it.  _He’s going to be okay_ , she told herself, letting her eyes slip closed.

 

Nien took her hand, squeezing it.

 

As Leia felt herself fading into the Force, she was filled with a sense of calm she hadn’t felt since she’d been a young girl.  Peace enveloped her, and as she moved out into it, she could feel love, and she knew that whatever this next step brought, she wasn’t going to have to face it alone.

 

“Hello,” she whispered.

 

Nien sat transfixed by the smile on the Princess’ face, and he spent a long time after her breathing had stopped, staring at it.  He finally looked up to C-3P0 and gave a nod.

 

“Goodbye, your highness,” the droid said.

 

R2-D2 whimpered.

 

**# # # #**

 

Poe ended his speech, smiling, and for a brief moment, he could have sworn he saw Leia and his father standing just to the side of command.  He looked over, but there was nothing there.

 

He blinked, and then, as he turned back around to start planning the Resistance’s next move, he was overwhelmed with a sense of well-being.  He closed his eyes, letting it wash over him.  “Thanks,” he whispered.  Tears filled his eyes, and he moved to wipe them away before they tumbled out.  _Been doing this way too much lately_.

 

He could hear C-3P0 tottering in, and he took a deep breath.  He already knew what the droid was going to tell him, but that didn’t mean it was going to hurt any less.

 

 


	19. The Starbird Reborn

 

 

The entire base was humming with a new kind of energy.  Beings were running.  Command was full of noise.  For a brief moment, Poe allowed himself to take it all in.

 

In many ways, it was something familiar—the buzz of a base during the height of battle—but in so many other ways, it was something new.  They’d been knocked down, nearly dead, and now they were rushing back into the thick of things.

 

Poe looked around at all of the different beings—barking out orders, transmitting codes, all of them making sure that this time, the Order wasn’t going to win.

 

Kaydel came up beside him.  “Tell the truth,” she said.  “How badly do you want to jump in an X-Wing and blow stuff up?”

 

Poe chuckled, shaking his head.  _It hadn’t even crossed my mind._   “Honestly, that’s…”  _That’s not who I am anymore_.  He looked at Kaydel.  “My place is here.”

 

She smiled.  “Well, then, General, what now?”

 

“Now?”  Poe smiled.  “We win this war, Colonel.”  Poe stepped up to the console in the center of command.  “Someone tell me the latest about the situation on Mandalore…”

 

**# # # #**

 

There were hundreds of beings milling about their makeshift camp on Lothal.  Most of them were former prisoners, and currently Rose had two soldiers reaching out and trying to find their families and friends.  It was clear, though, that many of them were alone, and that that was going to become an issue soon.

 

Plus, with whatever was happening at the training facility with Finn, she’d lost most of the actual soldiers that had come to help Rey liberate the prison.  They suddenly had an overabundance of people, but not a lot of Resistance, which was why the first thing they needed to handle was setting up a chain of command, so Rose gathered Snap, Jess, Rey, and Amir, who were now all standing around, staring at each other.

 

Rose stepped forward.  “So, ummmm, I guess,” she took a deep breath, trying to quash her anxiety.  “Commander Tico, for those of you who don’t know.”  She looked around the group.  “Amir and I have been at the base on Jedha, and Rey originally opted out of the chain of command, but…”

 

“But now, we need to figure out some sort of structure and get things up and running here,” Snap said.  “Because from the chatter, this war just got hot again.  Plus,” he said, looking around, “we basically have a refugee camp here.”

 

“Or a base,” Jess said, “depending on how many of them want to join up.”  She scanned the crowd and shared a quick smile with Bode.  “I know some of them want to.”

 

“Good,” Rose said.  “So?”

 

“Boss,” Nyss came running over.  “Reports that the Order is hitting Akiva.”

 

“Kriff,” Snap said, breaking off from the group and following Nyss back to over to the makeshift comm station. 

 

Jess watched him leave and said, “Okay, so I’m guessing Snap is headed back to Akiva.  That leaves…”

 

“You,” Rey said, nodding to Rose.  Jess smiled.  "You've been helping Poe in command at Jedha all this time, yes?  You know how things work?"

 

Rose looked from Rey to Jess and back again and squeaked, “Yes?”

 

Jess laughed, saying, “Okay, Rose is in charge.  We’ll promote her to Colonel,” she looked around the group raising her hand, “all those in favor?”

 

Everyone raised their hands.

 

“Okay, Colonel Tico, now what?”

 

“But…ummmmm,” Rose blinked several times.  “I…”

 

Amir grasped the chain around his neck.  “I think…”  He took a deep breath.  “Colonel,” he said, turing to Rose, “Queenie left us something that might help, and…I think,” he looked over towards Snap and Nyss.  “I think if it’s all the same, I’m going to see if Snap might make a quick stop on his way to Akiva so I can pick it up?”  He raised his eyebrows, waiting.

 

Rose nodded.  She reached over, squeezing his arm.  “I think that’s a wonderful idea, and I’m sure Snap will go along with it.  We’re going to need all the weapons and tech we can get our hands on.”

 

“Again,” Rey said, joking.

 

“Again,” Rose repeated.  “Oh boy,” she said, remembering what it had been like those first few weeks on Jedha until Amir had shown up.  She gave him a smile.  “For what it’s worth, I’m really glad you’re with us.”

 

Amir blushed and managed a small smile.  “Thanks, ma’am.”  He gave her a sharp salute before jogging over towards Snapp and Nyss.

 

Rose watched him for a beat befoe turning and looking at the rest of them.  “Anyone else leaving?”

 

Rey laughed.  “I’m going to stay put for a while.  I need a place to train Teean and Timiri.  Besides Dy wanted to join up, so…”

 

“And I’m promoting myself to Commander,” Jess said, “unless anyone has any objections?”

 

Rey laughed.  “I guess that makes me a Commander too, for what it’s worth.”

 

“Sure does,” Jess said, slapping her back.  “Unless you want to be a Colonel.  You’re a kriffing Jedi; I don’t think anyone is going to complain no matter what rank you have.”  Rey rolled her eyes, chuckling.  Jess looked over to Rose.  “So, what’s the plan, boss?”

 

Rose took a deep breath and then smiled.  “Well, first thing, we need to find a location for a real base…”

 

**# # # #**

 

In the pandemonium of the next two hours, during which time, Snap, Nyss and Amir had taken off for Akiva and Rose and Jess had found a suitable site for the Resistance’s new base, Rey had felt herself getting more and more agitated.  The children were with Dy helping the prisoners, so she took the opportunity to sneak away for a few minutes.

 

_Just to refocus._

 

She wandered a bit away from the crowds and sat cross-legged in the middle of a sea of grass. 

 

There were so many beings and so many emotions pouring off of them—elation, guilt, sadness, joy—that she needed to calm her mind.  There was also Leia’s passing.  She’d felt it; during Poe’s big speech, there had been a fluttering in her chest and then a sense that Leia Organa was gone.

 

_Not gone_ , Rey thought with a smile.  _Not really._

 

She felt the weight of her lightsaber on her leg and looked at it.  After Crait, she had shown Leia the pieces of her old saber.  Leia had smiled and assured her that it could be repaired in time and then, much later that night, she had appeared and handed Rey a small, sleek lightsaber.

 

“It’s mine,” Leia had said.  “ _Was_ mine.  I think you should keep it for now.”

 

Rey had opened her mouth to refuse and Leia had said, “It won’t be yours forever, but for now.”  She had given Rey a strange, sad smile.  “Eventually, you’ll want to build your own.”

 

Rey looked down at Leia’s gift.  During their last conversation, Leia had told Rey about the places in the galaxy where a being might find kyber crystals and then Leia had been a bit cryptic: “And you’ll have some beings who can help you with it soon enough.”

 

Rey frowned, remembering that.  It resonated with something Luke had said.  She thought about Temiri and Teean.  _Not them._

_Someone else._

The breeze stirred up the grasses around her and she looked out across the plains.  She had to admit, when they’d first set down on Lothal, she’d had a moment of disappointment— _another beige planet_ —but now she could appreciate the finer differences between grass and sand.

 

For one, there was the soothing noise the grasses made as they waved in the breeze.  _Almost like the ocean_ , Rey thought, remembering Ahch-to.

 

Thoughts of Ahch-to eventually led to thoughts of Kylo Ren.  She hadn’t shared any Force visions with him in a long time, and now, she wondered why. 

 

_I wonder what would happen if I was the one to initiate a conversation_ , she thought.

 

She closed her eyes, concentrating, reaching out.  She didn’t know why, but she felt in every fiber of her being that she needed to do this, to confront him, to invade his space just as he had invaded hers.

 

It didn’t take long before she could feel the waves of anger and…

 

_Fear?_

 

Rey nearly blinked her eyes open. 

 

_I’d forgotten that._

 

_All that kriffing bravado._

 

She re-focused, following the Force until almost like a snap, she was there, standing on the bridge of a First Order ship.

 

Kylo Ren turned, panting and sweating.  “Not now,” he screamed.  “Not kriffing now!”

 

“So, you get to choose when and how this bond works then, eh?”

 

He stalked towards her, his lightsaber out.  “Can’t you see that I’m—”  Ren stopped, straightening up.  “You’re working with him now, aren’t you?”  He shook his head, stomping away from her.  “Hux got to you and promised you something.”  He turned back to her.  “What did he promise?  What did he promise you that I didn’t,” he asked, rushing at her.

 

It took all of her training not to back away from him.  _It’s just a vision.  He can’t hurt you_.

 

She smiled at him.  “This was your choice, Ren.”

 

“What does that mean?”

 

“It means that, when the Resistance beats you—and they are going to beat you—you are going to be looking around for someone to blame.  I want you to remember that this was _your_ choice.”

 

There was a brief flicker of recognition in his eyes before Rey pulled her energy back and severed the link.

 

She took a deep breath and opened her eyes, pushing up and running back to camp to find Rose to tell her that there had been a split in the First Order’s command.

 

**# # # #**

 

Poe stared at the map being projected in the center of command.  The Bandomeer cell had managed to break through the Order’s blockade around Mandalore and the rest of the Mandalorians had finally joined up.  Right now, there was a massive battle raging there.

 

Lando and Chewie were gaining more and more recruits and had already started targeting First Order outposts and supply chains.  _And whatever they’re doing, it’s working_ , Poe thought, watching as new intel flittered across the datapad in his hand.

 

As Poe studied the map, he realized that they were still stretched just about as thin as an organization could stretch without breaking.

 

_But…_

 

He ran a quick hand through his hair, trying not to get too excited.  In the past day, it seemed that the Resistance’s message had finally started to sink in.  Kaydel had already told him about a new uprising in a nearby system, and there were rumors of at least two different mutinies on First Order ships.   Poe pressed his lips together.   _Please say that is true._

 

“Poe,” Kaydel said, ripping him out of his thoughts, “we have reports of attacks on First Order outposts in the Core.  Seems a group of ex-Republic pilots have taken it upon themselves to—”

 

Koo broke in, “We have a message from Rose.  She’s been promoted to Colonel—”

 

“Good of them to let me know,” Poe muttered, smiling.

 

“—and they’re setting up a base.  Snap and Amir are headed to Akiva to help fight the Order there.  Rey is going to stay on Lothal with her padawans, and…holy kriff.  According to Rey, there’s been a split in the Order’s leadership.  Hux has gone rogue and…wow.”  Koo’s eyes were wide.

 

Poe wanted to cackle with glee.  “Kaydel,” he said, “I want confirmation on that yesterday, and reach out to those Republic pilots.  See if they want some official back-up.”

 

“On it!”

 

“Poe,” yelled Zaré, “I’ve got Colonel Finn on the line.”  Poe jogged over, grabbing Zaré’s headset.  “Finn?”

 

“Poe?  Holy kriff, is it good to hear your voice.”

 

Poe smiled before remembering he was in the middle of command.  “Ummm, what’s the situation like there?”

 

“We’ve got the facility under control, and we were able to fight off the first group of reinforcements they sent after us, but we figure we’re going to be dealing with more soon.  But before they get here, I just…there are some problems.”

 

Poe’s heart sank.  “Problems?”

 

“No,” Finn said, “I mean, not us…just, from what I’ve seen around here, I think the Order is running out of credits.”

 

Poe sighed in relief.  “Yeah, that’s what we’ve heard from Jess and her bunch too,” he said.

 

“And, the rumor here is, I think Hux may have tried to kill Ren.”

 

“We heard that one too.”

 

“Thank kriffing goodness,” Finn breathed out.  “That makes our job a lot easier.  I’m pretty sure the cadets who’ve defected and our soldiers are going to be able to hold off whoever comes, but—”

 

“But I want you to keep a line open with Rose and her contingent on Lothal,” Poe said.  “They’re closer, and if you need them—”

 

“Then, we’ll make that call,” Finn said.  He took a breath and was about to cut the link when Poe made a noise.  “Poe?”

 

“Kriff,” Poe whispered.  _This is so not the time._   Poe licked his lips.  “Ummmm, look, I know this is a crap time for a personal conversation,” Poe said.

 

“Uhhhh, you think?”

 

“But before you go, I just wanted to tell you that, ummm, I’m in love with you?”

 

There was a pause.  Then, Poe could hear Finn swearing.  Finally, Finn said, “Fuck, Dameron, you did not just say that.”

 

“Actually, I did.”

 

“Now?”

 

“Yeah, now.  Might not get another chance.”

 

“I swear to all that is holy, Dameron, if I die before I get a chance to see you and tell you in person that I love you, I will hunt you down in the afterlife.”

 

Poe made a strange noise—somewhere between a gasp and a laugh.  _He loves me_.  “Sounds fair.”  Poe smiled.  “You love me?”

 

“Oh, for the love of,” Kaydel’s voice cut in over the comms.  “Poe loves Finn!  Finn loves Poe!  Now that we’ve got that out in the open, could we _please_ focus on the kriffing war?”

 

“Sorry, Colonel,” Finn said.

 

“Focusing,” Poe said.  “Be careful, Finn,” he whispered.

 

“You too,” Finn whispered back.  Then, he chuckled.  “See you soon, General.”

 

“Promise?”

 

“Promise.”

 

Poe looked over at Kaydel.  “He loves me.”

 

She rolled her eyes.  She turned towards the rest of command and said, “Hey, everyone, can we win this war already so Dameron can see his boyfriend?”

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Before the final chapter goes up tomorrow, I just wanted to say thanks again to everyone for all of the lovely comments. They mean a lot to me. Thanks!


	20. It's Time to Start Anew

 

 

Years later, scholars and historians would note that it wasn’t a single battle that decided the war, but rather, it had been a subtle shift in the galaxy. 

 

Some claimed it was General Dameron’s starbird speech.

 

Others claimed it was the sudden reappearance of Force-sensitive beings in the galaxy.

 

Still others claimed it was the mutiny at the training facility coupled with the split between Hux and Ren. 

 

Whatever it was, there was no denying that a number of decisive events happened in quick succession: the disaster at Junkfort Station, the liberation of the D-21 Prison, the split in the First Order leadership, and the mutiny at the Stormtrooper training facility, as well as the beginnings of the Battles of Mandalore and Akiva all happened within a few days of each other. 

 

Soon after, more and more systems started resisting the Order’s rule.

 

The war wasn’t over, but it was the beginning of the end.

 

And the Resistance was growing stronger every day.

 

Not only was the main base on Jedha thriving, but the base on Bandomeer welcomed Lando Calrissian’s and Chewbacca’s cell of smugglers, as well as refugees from Akiva, and the base on Lothal, under the leadership of Rose Tico, became home to a huge number of First Order defectors, as well as the former prisoners of D-21.

 

While there was still bloodshed and loss, and the Order was still a force to be reckoned with, there was also a sense of hope spreading throughout the galaxy…

 

**# # # #**

 

It was a little less than two weeks after Rose and the others had set up the new base on Lothal when a transport ship from the cell on Bandomeer landed.

 

While they’d been expecting supplies and new personell, Rey, Teean, and Timiri could all sense that there was something different about this transport.  When the ship broke atmo, they stopped their training and came running to meet it.

 

As the ramp lowered, three beings stepped out of the ship: a Togruta wrapped in a white cloak, an older human man, about Luke Skywalker’s age, and one about the same age as Poe.  Rey’s eyes went wide.  “Jedi,” she whispered.  Timiri hid behind her legs.  Teean made a move to stand in front of Rey in a defensive posture.

 

The older man laughed.  He held out a hand, coming down the ramp.  “Ezra Bridger,” he said.  “This is Jacen Syndulla and…”

 

“Ahsoka Tano,” the Togruta said.

 

Rey shook her head.  “I thought that…”  She looked at each of them in turn.  “I thought that Luke was the last…”

 

“He was the last of the Jedi,” Ahsoka said.

 

“But not the only Force-sensitive being out there,” Ezra said.

 

“And…”  Rey was truly flummoxed for the first time in a very long time.

 

“And,” Ezra said, sharing a look with Ahsoka.  “We’ve been backing up the cell on Bandomeer, but we thought you might like some help.”

 

Rey looked to Timiri and Teean and then smiled at the newcomers.  She nodded slowly and said, “I think I’d like that.  I think we all would.”

 

**# # # #**

 

Three months after the start of the Battle of Akiva, the Order was finally forced out of the system.

 

Snap leaned his head back, sliding into a chair in the cramped underground room that had served as his command center since he had landed and taken over control of the Akiva Resistance.  Nyss was seated at a terminal a few feet away.  “You okay, old man?”

 

Snap opened his eyes.  “You know I’m your commanding officer, right?”

 

Nyss rolled his eyes and turned back to his screen.  After a moment he pressed his ear phones to his head, listening intently.  He smiled.  “Ega wants you over on the tarmac.”

 

“Can’t you tell Ega—”

 

“Just go already, old man.”

 

“Colonel,” Snap said, pushing up with a groan.  “ _Colonel_ Wexley.  How hard is that to remember?”  Snap rubbed his eyes as he started forward, stifling a yawn.

 

A few minutes later, he blinked in the sunlight as he walked out onto the tarmac.  “So, what in the hell is so important it couldn’t—”

 

Karé Kun stood next to Ega.  She wore a sly smile on her face.  “I hear you’re a Colonel now, Wexley.”

 

“Karé?”

 

She nodded.

 

Snap ran to her, grabbing her and squeezing her to him.  “Oh maker,” he breathed out.  “Karé.”

 

She buried her face in his shoulder, wrapping her arms around him.  “I missed you,” she murmured.

 

Snap closed his eyes and breathed her in, praying this wasn’t some sort of dream.

 

Eventually, he put her down and stepped away to look at her, keeping one of her hands in his.  He turned to Ega.  “Did we know that…”

 

Karé laughed.  “Nyss and I have been working on it for a few weeks now.  Poe and Sabine have been keeping me and Lo pretty busy, but we managed to shuffle some other pilots around, and seeing as I’m now a colonel myself…”

 

Snap shook his head.  “Karé…” 

 

She turned to Ega.  “The Colonel and I are going to be busy for the next several hours, okay?”

 

“Of course,” Ega said, trying not to blush.

 

“Come on,” Karé said, tugging on Snap’s hand.  “Show me your bunk.”

 

Snap swallowed.  “Bunk.  Yeah.”  He followed Karé wearing a dopey smile.

 

Ega pressed her comm link.  “Nyss, the Colonel is going to be indisposed for a while.”

 

“I already cleared his schedule.”

 

**# # # #**

 

One month later, Rose was doing her usual rounds of the base.  Being in charge was still terrifying, and she was glad that she had the full support of Rey, Finn, and Jess because she constantly felt like she was screwing up.  _I wonder if this is how Poe felt?_

 

She sighed, spying Rey, Ezra, Teean, and Timiri all practicing defensive postures in the grass near the tarmac.  Ezra was helping Rey train the boys, teaching her what Kanan Jarrus had taught him about the Force.  _I can’t remember when I’ve seen her smile this much_ , Rose thought, stopping for a moment to watch them.

 

It also seemed to be a source of hope for many of the ex-prisoners and ex-Stormtroopers who were calling the base home.  Many of the younger cadets and ex-prisoners often wandered over and watched them train.  From time to time, Ezra and Rey would even invite them to join in.

 

Ahsoka Tano and Jacen Syndulla had gone out in search of more Force-sensitive beings, and their reports seemed to indicate that Lothal was about to be teeming with not-quite-Jedis.  _We’re getting too big for our little base_ , Rose thought with a chuckle.  _I’m going to be overrun with Force-sensitive beings._

 

“Ma’am,” Dy came running up.  “These are the latest reports on the Order’s activity near Kessel.”

 

“And this is?”

 

“Red Order,” Dy said, their code for Kylo Ren’s faction.  “Black Order seems to be grouping near Arkanis.”

 

“Shocker,” Rose muttered.

 

“General Dameron wants to know your thoughts on setting up a cell in that vicinity.  Colonel Wexley mentioned Tatooine.  Admiral Wren mentioned Crait or D’Qar.”

 

Rose nodded.  “I’ll send him a comm just as soon as I get back to command.” 

 

Dy nodded and ran back that way.

 

Rose took a deep breath, still not really believing that Poe was asking for her opinion on these things, although she was certain that by this point, Kaydel and Koo probably had just as much say on matters as he did.  _I miss them_ , she thought.

 

“Colonel,” Amir said, shaking her from her thoughts.

 

“Yes, Captain?”

 

He thrust a datapad at her.  “I understand that you and Finn and Rey are all these big heroes now, but we still haven’t worked out a good system yet for distinguishing all of the ex-Stormtroopers who—”

 

Rose groaned.  This was Amir’s latest pet peeve: in the aftermath of the liberation of their training facility, a big chunk of the cadets had chosen symbolically significant names.  On the Lothal base that meant that they had over two dozen Finns, ten Reys, four Roses, and about fifteen Poes, not to mention all of the Lukes, Leias, and Hans.  It was confusing to say the least.  “I’m not going to tell those beings to change their names,” she hissed, starting towards command.

 

“And I’m not asking you to!”  Amir rolled his eyes.  “I’m just suggesting that we figure out sirnames or something.  Almost all of them are the same rank, and it’s getting really tiring to have to say, _Tall Rose_ or _Blue-eyed Finn_ , especially as there are at least three blue-eyed Finns wandering around!”

 

“Fine,” Rose said.  “Talk to Bode and see what the two of you can work out.  And find Colonel Finn; he might have some suggestions.”

 

“Yes, ma’am,” Amir said, offering her a playful wink as he started off.

 

“I still don’t like you,” Rose called after the man.

 

“You know you love me, ma’am,” he yelled over his shoulder.

 

Rose sighed and started back to command.  _The Resistance is a strange family_ , she thought.  As she looked around at all of the beings on base, she added, _thank goodness for that._

 

**# # # #**

 

Two months later, Poe Dameron ran out of the base to stand on the edge of the tarmac.  He immediately started scanning the skies.

 

Kaydel and Koo walked up, flanking him.  “Thought you were gonna be late,” Kaydel said with a wink and a smile.

 

Poe rolled his eyes.

 

Two months ago, they got a new recruit with mental health experience.  At first Poe had contended that there were a number of other beings more in need of the doctor’s services than him, but Kaydel had insisted that Poe go see them, and now he had a standing appointment every other week.  Poe was pretty sure that all of the caf on base would suddenly evaporate if he started skipping his appointments—plus, if he were being honest, it helped to have someone to talk to, someone who could help him work through everything that had happened, everything that was still happening.

 

He’d come straight from this week’s appointment, grateful he hadn’t missed the transport.

 

“Anything yet,” Koo asked.

 

Poe shook his head.

 

Then, as if on cue, a small ship became visible on the horizon.  Poe rolled forward on his toes, bouncing.  He’d told Finn he loved him exactly six months ago, and in that time, they’d been able to talk over the comms from time to time.  They’d shared a number of private messages, and a few holos, but the realities of war meant they hadn’t seen each other in person yet.

 

Poe knew what he and Finn had said to each other—had continued to say to each other for the last six months—but he couldn’t help but worry.  _What if it was the adrenaline of battle?_   _What if we’re both basing this on something that isn’t real?  What if Finn gets off that ship and decides he was wrong?_

 

“Would you stop that,” Kaydel said.

 

“What,” Poe asked.

 

Koo rolled her eyes.  “I’ve never seen a being look simultaneously like he was going to jump out of his skin with excitement and—”

 

“And like his boyfriend just dumped him,” Kaydel said, pointing to the frown on Poe’s face.

 

“But—”

 

Both women groaned. 

 

The ship landed and Kaydel pushed Poe forward.  “Just go talk to him already.”

 

Poe took a deep breath and started forward, forcing himself to walk and not run.  The ramp was just coming down as he made it to the ship.

 

The first being off the ship trilled a high-pitched noise and came rolling at top speed towards Poe.

 

“Bee,” Poe screamed.  He started laughing and pushed his way to the front of the crowd, crouching down and hugging the droid to him.  “How are you, buddy?”

 

[Designation Friend-Rose made me a Sergeant.]

 

Poe laughed even louder, rubbing the front of BB-8’s belly.  “Well, then, Sergeant, it’s good to have you back.  I missed you.”

 

BB-8 beeped quietly.  [I missed you too.] 

 

C-3P0’s voice then carried over the crowd.  “Is that?  Why, it is!  BeeBee-Ate, it is good to see you.”

 

BB-8 made a happy noise and rolled over to the golden droid.  Poe stood, smiling as he watched the two of them chat.  He then turned around, scanning the group of beings who were leaving the transport, waiting for that one being that…

 

“Finn!”  He went up on his tip-toes, waving.

 

Finn burst into a huge smile, waving back.  He made his way through the crowd to Poe.

 

They both started to hug and then stopped, suddenly awkward and unsure.

 

“Ummmm,” Finn said, looking down.

 

“Hey,” Poe said.

 

Finn looked up.  “Hey.”  He reached up to rub the back of his neck.

 

Poe grabbed Finn’s hand.  “That’s…that’s my ring,” he whispered.

 

Finn had started wearing the ring on his pinky finger during the last few months.  “Oh, yeah,” Finn said.  He started to pull it off.  “I just…”

 

“No,” Poe said, reaching over and pushing it back onto Finn’s finger.  He then laughed.  “Keep it.  It suits you.”  He didn’t let go of Finn’s hand.

 

“Yeah?”

 

Poe nodded. 

 

“Oh,” Finn said, reaching into one of his pockets.  “Jess wanted me to give this to you.”  He pressed Kes’s ring into Poe’s hand.

 

Poe closed his eyes, willing himself not to cry.  “Thanks,” he whispered, putting the chain around his neck.  Then, after a moment, he collected himself.  Looking into Finn’s eyes, he couldn’t help himself: “You’re a good man, Finn.”

 

Finn shook his head, chuckling.  “That’s what I hear,” he said.  He scratched the top of his head, suddenly nervous.  Finn looked into Poe’s eyes.  “So…”

 

“Yeah?”

 

Finn leaned forward.  “Now what?”

 

Poe shook his head.  “No clue.”

 

Finn laughed again.  He reached up, cupping Poe’s face.  “It’s good to see you.”

 

Poe stepped closer, whispering, “You have no idea.”

 

Finn pulled him forward, slowly closing his eyes and pressing his lips to Poe’s.

 

**# # # #**

This is what Poe would always remember about his first kiss with Finn: everything else fell away—all his fears, the constant nagging concerns that he wasn’t doing his job right, the buzz of beings around him, the gritty feel of dust on his arms, the sun pounding down on his head.  All of that was instantly replaced by Finn, the smell of him, the taste of him, the tiny happy noises Finn was making, and most of all, the way Finn’s lips felt against his own. 

 

As he grasped Finn’s shirt, pulling him closer, Poe felt nearly drunk on Finn, and the only coherent thought in his head was that he wanted to feel like this for the rest of his life.  He wanted Finn beside him and in his bed; he wanted to talk to him and argue with him and hold hands with him.  And most of all, he wanted to keep kissing him.

 

Poe murmured Finn’s name as if it were a prayer and smiled into the kiss.

**# # # #**

It wasn’t Finn’s first kiss, and as he heard Poe moan and felt Poe’s hands tighten in his shirt, he hoped it wouldn’t be his last.

 

And while it was generally hard to drown out the years of First Order indoctrination that told him that he was wrong for feeling, wrong for caring, wrong for wanting a connection with other beings, in this moment, every fiber of Finn’s being told him that this was _right_ , that this was perhaps the rightest thing he’d ever done.  And he fully intended to keep doing it for as long as he could.

 

He moved his thumb across Poe’s cheek, loving how the stubble rubbed against him, and he felt tears in his eyes.  Finn was still becoming acquainted with the feeling of joy, but as it settled into his bones, he couldn’t help but think that this was what they were really fighting for: giving every being in the galaxy a chance to feel like this.  He let the tears fall down his cheeks as he pulled Poe closer.

 

 _Zeb and Kal had thirty years together,_ Finn thought, and then he made a silent promise to himself that he and Poe were going to have at least that.  _Hopefully more_.  He felt Poe smile against his lips. 

 

_Definitely more._

**# # # #**

 

When they finally broke apart, Poe could hear the hoots and whistles of the soldiers around them.  He blushed and rolled his eyes, turning to say, “I’m sure all of you have better places to be.”

 

“Yes, sir,” said Kaydel.  “Come on!  Let’s give the General and the Colonel some space.”  She began herding beings away.

 

Poe shook his head, looking back at Finn.  For a moment, he looked concerned.  Finn blinked and then realized his cheeks were wet.  “Happy,” he whispered.  “Happy tears.”

 

Poe smiled.  “Happy tears,” he said, wiping one of them off of Finn’s cheek.

 

Finn took Poe’s hand.  “I was hoping,” he said, suddenly a bit shy, “that my bunk might be close to yours?”

 

Poe nodded.  “It’s right down the hall, actually.”  He bit his lip.  “But…”

 

“But?”

 

“But I’m hoping you might not want to use it all that often?  I mean, I have a perfectly good room with a nice bed.  We even have doors now.”

 

Finn laughed.  “Well, if you have a door, then…”  He smiled back up at Poe.  “I’d like that.”

 

Poe nodded.  He couldn’t quit smiling.  “Then, let’s do this.”  He pointed towards the base.  He started forward, tugging on Finn’s hand.

 

Finn let go of Poe’s hand and stood up straight, throwing Poe a sharp salute.  “Colonel Finn back _as promised_ , General.”

 

Poe chuckled, returning the salute.  “Good to have you back, Colonel.”

 

“Good to be back.”

 

“Well, now that you’re back, I guess it’s time for us to get to work, don’t you think?”  Poe started over towards command.

 

Finn fell in.  “I guess so.”  He bumped his shoulder into Poe’s.  “The sooner we finish this war, the sooner we can get to,” he wagged his eyebrows, “better things?”

 

“Better things?”  Poe laughed.  “Oh, I like the sound of that.”  He wrapped an arm around Finn’s shoulders.  He gave Finn a quick squeeze before letting his hand trail down Finn’s back and then to his arm.

 

Finn intertwined his fingers with Poe’s, stealing a look at the other man.

 

Poe blushed.  “What?”

 

Finn shook his head.  “Just…”  He let out a satisfied sigh, squeezing Poe’s hand.  “This.”  He shook his head again, wishing he could find the words.

 

“This,” Poe said, feeling complete for the first time... _for the first time since this damn war started._   He smiled at Finn, his eyes crinkling. 

 

Finn smiled back and then he took in the scene in front of them: hundreds of beings running to and fro, ships on the tarmac, gleaming in the sunlight.  The buzz of energy.  Optimism so palpable that Finn wanted to reach out and grab it.  Finn let Poe tug him towards command and he closed his eyes, trying to memorize the sensation—the sound of beings moving about with purpose, the smell of grease and sweat and dirt, the warmth of Poe’s hand in his.  He thought about all the events—all the little miracles—that had brought him safely to this moment. 

 

He felt tears welling in his eyes again.

 

The war was far from over, but on a sunny day on Jedha, walking hand-in-hand with the man he loved, Finn was filled with a sense of hope that was damn near intoxicating.  “This,” he repeated.

 

Poe looked over and smiled.  He stopped, turning to face Finn.  His Finn.  The man who rescued him and challenged him, who kept on surprising him, and who made all of this just a bit more bearable.  Poe nodded, bringing Finn’s hand up and pressing a quick kiss to it.   “Let’s go win this war, Finn.”

 

“Let’s go win this war, Poe.”

 

 

**# # # #**

**# # # #**

**# # # #**

 

_“Starbird, Starbird,” they whisper in the night._

_The darkness is coming; you must take flight._

_Ashes to ember, and ember to flame._

_“Starbird, Starbird,” they all proclaim._

_For those left behind._

_For those whose way is hard._

_For the beaten, the bruised._

_For those left scarred._

_For the believers, the defiant,_

_heretic, and fighter._

_For the true of heart,_

_waiting for the fire._

_“Starbird, Starbird,” we yell into the night._

_The darkness is coming; we must take flight._

_Rise from the ashes, see the mission through._

_Gather, Rebels, it’s time to start anew…_

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you again, dear readers, for taking this journey with me. I hope you enjoyed it.
> 
> I'm grateful for all of the kind comments and all of the kudos along the way. Thanks!

**Author's Note:**

> I will be updating weekdays until this is complete
> 
> Character tags will be added as new chapters post.
> 
> For a list of characters, you can consult [this post.](https://cha-llamala.tumblr.com/post/171795769608/below-the-cut-i-have-a-reference-guide-of) Just be warned that it will contain spoilers for future chapters.
> 
>  
> 
> As always, I appreciate all comments and kudos.


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